Homewrecker (Into the Flames #1) (19 page)

There’s no reason for me to respond since I know the question wasn’t meant for me, but I want to. I want to tell him that if he paid attention he would know exactly what to do. If he asked to try something I wouldn’t even hesitate on saying yes. The only way to grow is to try new things but he’s used to the way things are, to me going with the flow of whatever he wants. Him shutting me down last night makes me think that he isn’t open to trying anything unless it is an idea that he comes up with and that is something I’m not OK with.

He was right with his question though. What the hell do we do now?

“Kennedy?” Gunnar whispers over the back of his chair.

I look up from my phone, stopping the reply I was about to send Lynsey and smile at him. “Hmm?”

“Can you grab me another beer?” It lacks its usual sweetness, the tone in his voice has been more deadpanned lately. It’s safe to say that the elephant in the room has made itself at home and invited friends.

Dixon chuckles from beside me, never taking his eyes from the game tape playing on the screen. Leaning over, I punch his shoulder, sliding my fingers down his arm and slide off of the stool. I know by the curve of his lip when I look back at him, even though he isn’t looking at me, that I just ignited a fire in him that I can’t put out in front of my husband. I think back to the night of the game when we were in the back of the truck and grin because I know exactly how I’m going to pay him back for that.

I pop the top off the cold bottle I pull from the fridge and saunter around the island to hand it to Gunnar. Leaning down, I brush my lips across his and his eyes close but I never take my eyes off of Dixon. He sighs, not kissing me back, but also not refusing me his mouth. I hate this, but I can’t even begin to figure out how to fix it alone. All I want to do is escape it all.

Nothing has been talked out between Gunnar and myself. Hell, we have barely talked at all since that night. I am totally aware that nothing is going to get worked out between us if we keep avoiding the situation, but avoiding is better than making it worse. Since that’s all I can really see happening at this point, I keep my mouth shut. Instead, I find myself desperately needing distraction to keep me from focusing on my life being in shambles. The last thing I want to do is focus on the mess that I have made and it just keeps piling up now especially since our anniversary night meltdown.

Cue Dixon Hale who is quickly becoming my favorite distraction.

Dixon shakes his head, his eyes narrowing as he watches me walk back around to my seat. The second I’m seated I cross my legs, pulling my skirt up over my knee. My hand drops to his upper thigh, dragging my fingernails over his already hardening cock. I love that I can do this to him since I’m not his typical type. Lynsey was right, not that I am planning to tell the bitch that and give her an opportunity to gloat. Ava had no staying power, but for whatever reason, I affect him in a way that keeps him coming back for more. It’s only fair, since he has the same effect on me. It is so easy to get lost in him and the way he makes me feel. It’s a welcome feeling since everything in my life is such a wreck. I don’t have to think with Dixon and that is the draw to keep going back. For however short a time I am beneath his hands, I forget to hate myself and the situation that is mostly my own doing.

He grabs my hand, stopping me before I reach his zipper. I smile sweetly up at him and grab my phone.

Payback
. I type out, deleting it once I know he’s seen it. Reaching over he pulls my phone between us and types back.

Don’t start a game u can’t win…

Looking up, I check to make sure that Gunnar is still paying attention to the television and type.

Game on!

Taking my hand off my phone, I grab his arm and pull it away from my other hand, freeing it to go back to what I was doing before. I make sure that I’m careful so Gunnar doesn’t hear the zipper sliding down. My fingers wrap around Dixon’s length as I pull it out of his jeans without looking away from him. His eyes flick from me, to Gunnar, and back a few times as I stroke him, rolling my thumb over the tip and metal balls with every upstroke. Wrapping his fingers around the edge of the island, I have to bite my tongue to keep from laughing as his knuckles whiten with the tightening of his grip.

Gunnar starts to talk, and as hard as it is for him, Dixon answers. My slow torture has Dixon’s thighs clenching until he can’t handle it anymore. Grabbing my hand, he shoves it away and tucks himself back in, adjusting his cock with a pained look.

“All right, guys, I’m gonna head home. I’m on call in a few hours.” With his head shaking, he leaves without even waiting for anyone to say goodbye.

“That was weird,” Gunnar mumbles, pressing pause on the game.

Maybe avoidance is what we need right now. I wonder if we let it go for a while and get back to the way things usually are, the kinks will work themselves out. Sliding off the stool, I step around the counter, and crawl into his lap. He burrows his face in my neck, pressing his lips against my collar bone like he always does and I sigh, sagging into him, but the second I get comfortable my phone vibrates. Reaching behind us, I grab my phone off the island and open the text from Dixon behind Gunnar’s head.

Your ass. My house. NOW!

I clench, rocking against Gunnar without even realizing it because of the threat I know is in Dixon’s words. Gunnar’s hands grip my hips, pulling me harder against him. For a second I almost contemplate texting Dixon back and telling him no. Until Gunnar opens his mouth again and halts my movements.

“You haven’t seen Lynsey in few days, why don’t you text her and she what she’s doing. Maybe you should have a girls’ night.”

Who does that? Who tells their wife to leave when she’s rocking her hips on their dick? Oh, that’s right, my husband. Yes, I did just have my hand on some other guy’s cock, and yes we have been fighting, but I’ve never pushed him away like this. I never would. The hurt in his dismissal stings. My heart sinks; hope for any kind of resolution between us tonight tumbles down the drain. Instead of upsetting him and possibly starting another argument that neither of us will deal with, I think on my toes and try not to sound disappointed when I speak.

“Yeah, Mark just texted and said he hasn’t heard from her either. We probably should go find out what crawled up her ass before she starts throwing dildos at us the next time we work together.”

I slip out of his grip and without kissing him goodbye, I grab my phone and keys as I walk out the door. Starting the car, I text Lynsey some shit about missing her face so she knows I need her to cover for me and speed out of the driveway. It doesn’t take long before I’m pulling up to Dixon’s house and my headlights bounce off the tailgate of his truck. Light fills the yard and it doesn’t take long for me to realize that Dixon is standing in the middle of the driveway watching me like a hawk. An extremely dangerous hawk. As soon as I shut the car off and step out, he’s on me. His fingers tangle in my hair, lips clash, teeth crash, and I’m left gasping for air the second he pulls back to rip my shirt over my head.

“Game on?” he asks, an evil grin crossing his lips. “Were those your words? Did you actually make the mistake of tellin’ me game on, Sunshine?”

“I wouldn’t call it a mistake,” I reply, tilting my head out of the way as he moves his lips over my neck and chest. “I think I got what I wanted.”
More like what I needed right now
. I need to forget, for all that hurt to disappear. I am desperate for Dixon to grab the reins I can’t hold on to and for just a little while make everything better. I have grown to rely on this, on him, to make me feel something other than the rejection that I feel coming from Gunnar lately. I can’t fix the things lingering between Gunnar and me alone and he doesn’t even seem to want to try. With Dixon, I don’t have to fix anything. It is what it is and all I have to do is feel. That I can do.

“I think you’re gonna get more than you expected tonight.” Gripping the back of my thighs, Dixon hitches me up around his hips without an issue and wastes no time making his way into the house to his bedroom. I drag my teeth across his earlobe, earning me a slap to the ass before he tosses to me to the bed. Flipping my skirt out of the way, he dives between my legs, running his tongue along my slit. It’s just enough to drive me completely insane, but not enough to get me where I want to be.

I scream his name, forgetting for a moment that I hate myself and my life as it is right now. Forgetting that no matter what I do there is no going back and fixing it.

I moan his name, tightening my fingers in his hair to hold him where he is but Dixon wants no part of being held still. Pulling away from me, I’m left panting as he grabs something from underneath the bed. Without saying anything, he grips my hips, flipping me onto my stomach and knees and slaps my ass. I gasp at the sudden sting, but rock back into him for more because I love the bite of pain.

“I’ve always wondered how dirty I could make you. How far will you go, Kennedy? What will you let me do to you?”

I tighten my fingers around his sheets when he dips a finger into me. It’s slow, teasing, and completely fucking tortuous and he knows it. Is there anything I wouldn’t let him do to me? At this point, no, probably not.

“Anything,” I finally admit. “Anything you want to do to me, do it.”

He makes this noise and I swear it’s a damn growl but I can’t be sure because it was so low. “Good answer, Sunshine, because that’s exactly what I plan on doin’.”

Without warning, he drops his head back down, running his tongue from my clit to my ass, rolling it around there for a few seconds before retracing his path. My body flushes as I try to wiggle away but his rough hands on my hips hold me in place. I’m not sure if I’m blushing because of what Dixon is doing to me, or because of the fact that it feels really damn good and I don’t want him to stop. Ever. However, I am extremely glad I had just hopped out of the shower a few minutes before Dixon showed up at the house.

Cold metal slides along my thigh, causing goosebumps to pop up across my skin. The top to a bottle pops open, causing me to flip my head around to see exactly what he thinks he’s doing. The teasing glint in his eye doesn’t match the calming tone in his voice at all.

“Trust me?” he asks, setting a blue jeweled plug on my ass. I nod even though I’m not entirely positive. As much as I want it, it scares the hell out of me because I’ve never had anything in my ass before. “I’m not gonna hurt you, do you understand me?”

“Yes.” I breathe, pressing my face into the mattress as he pours the cold lube down the crack of my ass. After running his finger through it, he works that finger slowly into my ass. I tense up, freaking out about what he’s doing when he grabs the plug. Pulling his finger free, he presses the tip of the plug against my ass, rolling it and pushing it in a little bit more with each movement. The pressure is different, not painful like I expected it to be, and the second the plug is settled the weight of it has me moaning.

Dixon kisses his way up my spine, letting his teeth graze over my skin as he goes until the length of his body has mine pressed against the bed. “You OK?” he asks, rocking his knee against the end of the plug.

“Fuck yes,” I moan. I can’t get anything else out. It’s like the path from my brain to my mouth was disconnected when he pushed the plug in.

He chuckles, leaning back up on his knees and settles between my thighs, spreading them wide for him. “I think you should have one of these in your ass at all times because this is a fuckin’ beautiful sight.”

I attempt to answer but am cut off when my phone starts ringing from the pocket of my skirt. Dixon fishes around until he grabs it and hands it to me. Gunnar’s face flashes across my screen, and I want to throw the phone. “Perfect timing,” I mutter, wondering why the hell he would be calling me after how he basically pushed me out the door in the first place.

“Answer it, Kennedy,” he says calmly. “If you don’t, he won’t stop calling, but you better mask that tone in your voice.”

When I hesitate he slaps my ass, thinking it will make me listen. What he doesn’t know is that it only makes me want to beg for more. Instead, I do as I’m told and take a deep breath before connecting the call.

“Hello.”

“Did you make it to Lyn’s? Is she OK?”

“Mhm,” I say, biting my lip to keep from moaning because Dixon thinks right now is a good time to play with the plug. “Nothing but a case of the sad vagina.”

“Oh, OK,” he mumbles. “Well, can you pick up some aspirin on your way home? I’ve got a killer headache from practice today.”

“Sure.” I gasp when Dixon slips the head of his cock into me, making me feel fuller than ever because of the plug. I rush out my next set of words because I don’t think I’ll make it any longer and tell him that I’ll be home in a bit and that I have to go make Lynsey feel better. I glare back at Dixon the second I hang up. “Not. Fair.”