Authors: Dara Girard
He rubbed his forehead with regret. “I should have told you.”
She tapped harder. “Is that an apology?”
“Things have happened so fast between us it didn’t seem important. She’s my past.”
Brenna took a deep breath, trying to keep calm. “Your ex-wife, the woman whose very voice you loved, is married to your cousin and you didn’t think it was important?”
“In all honesty, no.” He shrugged nonchalant. “I don’t have a good excuse.”
“Let me be generous and give you one.”
He bowed in challenge. “Proceed.”
“She still means something to you. That’s why you didn’t tell me.”
He shook his head. “No.”
“Every time you look at her and James you think he could have been yours.”
His eyes darkened dangerously. “No, he’s not mine and I know that.”
“Then why are you holding him right now as if it were the most natural thing in the world?”
“I told you why.”
“Because you’re the only one who can calm him?” she said doubtful.
“Yes.”
“But I think it’s because he’s Angie’s son.”
“He’s family. He’s my blood and I love him for it. Nothing more.
I don’t look back. I never look back.” He touched the curve of her neck, the warmth of his fingers only feeding the fire of anger within her. “Hopefully within a year I’ll have a son of my own.”
“Then we’d better start looking at adoption agencies.”
His hand fell. “Adoption? I thought we’d have our own first then we can adopt if you like.”
“I don’t want to have children.”
“But I do.”
She nodded. “There are plenty of women who will carry a child for you.”
He frowned. “I don’t want that.”
“Why not? It’s an option. Just like getting a stranger to marry you.”
“You’re not a stranger and as my wife it’s your duty to have my child.”
“Yes, my duty as part of the plan,” she said grimly realizing the weight of the bargain she’d made. “As much as I would like to fulfill my duty I recognize that it is impossible.”
His voice became gentle. “You can’t have children?”
“I can. But I don’t like to lose.”
“Neither do I.”
“Then let’s make sure the odds are in our favor.” She patted her bad leg with sadness and regret, remembering how Byron had rejected her and her mother’s fears that no man would want her. “This is genetic. It could be passed down.”
“
Could be
is not a definitive term.”
“But there’s a risk. Doran and Angelina’s children will be strong while yours could end up like me.”
He glanced up at the sky exasperated. “What’s the likelihood?”
“Too high to try.”
His gaze met hers. “He could be healthy. Or he could be deaf or blind or anything! That won’t make him any less my son.”
“Yes, your son. There are many ways to achieve that without me. I’ll raise him and —”
“No.” He spun away.
She poked him with her cane. “Don’t turn your back on me.”
He slowly turned around. “Forgive me. I thought this discussion was finished.”
Brenna set her cane down. She briefly shut her eyes. “I can bear many things, but I couldn’t bear to marry a man whose children may be a disappointment to him. I know how it feels to have a father who doesn’t...” She bit her lip. “I have no qualms knowing that you don’t love me, but I will not stand by if you don’t love our kids.”
“Brenna—”
She blinked away tears as she glanced at James resting his little head on Hunter’s broad shoulders with the beautiful innocence that comes with complete trust and security. “You have a good heart and I know you’ll try to love the child whatever he or she may be, but this rivalry between you and Doran will affect that and our marriage. Our child would always be compared to theirs. We could lie and say I’m unable to have children and get a surrogate. It will be the same.”
“No.”
Her voice fell. “I will make an excellent wife, a great hostess, but this is one area I can’t control. I know my limitations. I just can’t compete. Not in this way.”
“This isn’t a competition.”
“Of course it is. Your grandfather likes to fuel it too.”
“It keeps us on our toes.”
“But this isn’t about business, this is personal. This is between you and Doran. You still love her.”
“No, I don’t,” he said in a low voice. James shifted and his face scrunched up as though he wanted to cry, but Hunter gently stroked the baby’s head until he settled and relaxed again.
His tenderness tore at Brenna’s heart because all she could see was the love he’d had and could still have for Angie. “How do you know?”
Hunter hesitated, then clenched his teeth. “I just do.”
“Because you’ve told yourself you don’t love her?”
“Brenna, this has nothing to do with Angie.”
“I know she’s a soft spot, which means something.”
He rubbed the back of his neck, as if he’d wished he hadn’t shared that with her. “My marriage is a soft spot not Angie.”
“Wasn’t she part of it?”
“You don’t understand. This is between us, no one else. As my wife you will have my children. Why are we arguing about something that isn’t even a concern yet?”
“Because it will be. I know. I’ve lived it.”
“This is different. As I agreed I will pay for your medical bills. If necessary, I will pay for any surgery or procedures our children may need if it came to that.”
What if it did? Would it be fair to watch her child go through the series of surgeries she’d suffered in the effort to become normal? Had Byron been right to call her desires selfish? “I don’t know.”
“The bargain is to perform all the duties of a wife.”
“So there’s no compromise? No room for negotiations?”
He paused, for a moment looking uncertain, then shook his head.
Brenna fell quiet not sure if she was angry or disappointed then asked, “So, am I on probation now or am I fired?”
His gaze pierced hers. “It’s up to you whether you wish to stay or quit.”
She pulled off the ring with a steady hand.
He stared at her, ignoring the ring she held out to him. “You don’t want to do this.”
Brenna reached out and touched James’ soft curls then let her hand fall. Here was something Hunter could freely love even he’d never admit that his heart belonged to someone else. “Yes, I do. I didn’t realize how deep this game was. How much you needed to win it. I’m afraid I can’t give you the winning advantage.” She took his hand and placed the ring in his palm.
Hunter gripped it, his voice quiet. “I thought you weren’t afraid of anything.”
Brenna turned.
He jumped in front of her. “Was that a lie?” She tried to move around him. He blocked her path, his voice hardened. “Was it?”
She spoke in a raw, quiet voice. “Yes, it was a lie. Yes, I have fears. I’m afraid of being a failure. It terrifies me that it’s possible that all that I do, all that I am will never be enough. Never. If I married you, how will I know that you aren’t comparing me to her? That she doesn’t still claim a part of you?”
His tone became amused. “You almost sound jealous.”
“I am jealous. Jealous that everywhere I turn I seem to bump into my limitations.”
“Because you put them in front of you.”
She began to move around him.
He grabbed her arm. “Okay. I admit that I’ve handled this wrong. But believe me when I say that this—us—has nothing to do with Angie or Doran or anyone else. This is about two people—”
“Following your plan. Don’t you remember that the entire basis of this marriage was so you could get a promotion? I would have to say this marriage includes a lot of people. Do you think your grandfather would take kindly—-”
“He’ll learn to watch his tongue.”
Brenna studied him a moment. He believed what he said, even if he was lying to himself. He honestly believed that their marriage could become something real: Something that wasn’t about pressure, competition and dominance. She’d stop this charade for his sake as well as hers. She turned away. “I can’t.”
“So you’re just going to walk away?” Hunter called after her.
She kept walking.
“You’ll let fear rule your life?” he asked as a challenge.
She stopped then looked at him ready to offer him her own challenge. “Speaking of fear. Why don’t you want to remind anyone of your mother? Why won’t anyone mention her name or talk about her? What is the Randolph family afraid of?”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
A pale sun splashed light over the parlor room early the next morning. It barely touched Hunter who sat in the corner, staring at the ring Brenna had left behind. It had only been a few hours since her departure. It seemed longer. In a casual tone he’d explained at breakfast that the wedding was off. His parents didn’t take much notice, believing it was a simple lover’s quarrel that would soon be settled. His grandfather nodded, sharing that he knew she had a temper. Hunter knew in time the truth would come to light.
Doran sauntered into the room and stood near the bay windows, looking out at the pristine lawn and white clouds. “You deserve a standing ovation, cousin. That was skillfully planned.” He turned to Hunter. “You present a fiancée, secure the director’s position, lose her and keep the director’s position all within a week and no one suspects a thing.” He stood by the chair where Hunter sat and patted him on the shoulder. “Impressive.”
Hunter twirled the ring between his fingers.
“Answer one question for me.” Doran bent over, resting his hands on the armrests. “Was she really crippled or was that part of the act?”
Hunter’s hand shot out like lightning and grabbed Doran’s collar. His eyes slammed into his. “She has a limp. How would you like to walk with one?”
Doran grabbed Hunter’s wrist even as he began to see stars. “You don’t scare me,” he wheezed.
“I’m not trying to scare you.” He tightened his grip. “I’m trying to hurt you.”
Angelina entered the room. “Hunter, let go of my husband,” she said absently as though they were two children at play.
“You’ll have to give me a good reason.”
“Hunter,” she warned.
He casually shoved him away.
Doran stumbled into a table then regained his balance. He rubbed his neck. “People lacking intellect always resort to violence.”
“People lacking intellect also don’t know when to stop,” his wife countered with a significant look.
Doran straightened his collar.
“I want to speak to Hunter alone.”
“You won’t get far.”
She gently pushed her husband towards the exit. “I’ll get farther than you.” Once Doran was gone she looked at Hunter. “So what happened?”
“He got on my nerves.”
Angelina sat on the sofa and gestured for him to join her. He ignored it. “I’m not talking about Doran.”
“I don’t think there’s anything else that is your business.”
“Come on Hunter we used to be friends.”
He pushed Brenna’s ring into his pocket. “Yes, and I used to love you. Neither is true anymore.”
Her voice was barely a whisper. “You could have asked me to stay. You didn’t have to give me up so easily. If you’d fought for me—”
“Is that what you’d wanted? A fight? I didn’t realize it was the husband’s duty to fight for his wife’s fidelity. Sorry to have disappointed you.”
She frowned. “That’s not what I meant.”
“I loved you. I wanted you to be happy no matter how much that—” He drummed his fingers on the armrest. “Are you happy?”
“Very.”
Hunter stood. “Then the story has a happy ending.”
“But it’s not the end. You—”
He picked up one of the pillows and studied its design. “You loved Doran, he loved you. You may have wanted me to be your rescuing knight for one day, but you would have grown to despise me. Don’t blame me for our failed marriage. There were two people involved and only one heart.”
Angelina’s voice grew sad. “So you’ll continue to hate me?”
Hunter threw the pillow on the couch. “Don’t be dramatic. I’ll never hate you.” He went to the window. “I don’t even dislike you.”
She smiled. “That’s something.”
“Your husband; however, is an exception.”
“You used to be friends.”
He shook his head. “No, we were never friends. We just tolerated each other more.”
“Then you should start again.”
He turned, wary. “What do you mean?”
She bit her lower lip then said, “You and I both know Doran deserves the director’s position.”
He smiled coldly. “So that’s what this is about.” He nodded amazed. “Clever maneuver. For a fleeting moment I thought you cared about me.” He clasped his hands behind his back. “I only intend to concede once in my life. I’ve already done that.”
“You’ll never be happy until this rivalry stops. Until Doran stops being the reason you go after things.”
“That argument doesn’t work. Try another one.”
Angelina stood. “Why do you make it so tempting for women to walk out on you?”
He grabbed her arm as she passed him, his voice hard. “Is that your excuse for infidelity?”
Her eyes pierced his. “I was always true to you.”
“But not to our vows.” He let her arm go. “I made it easy for you to leave because I found no reason to make you stay.”
Her bottom lip quivered. “You’re being cruel.”
“No, just honest. Think about how relieved you felt when I let you go.” His voice deepened. “How you told me that my love scared you.”
“It did. It was too much.”
Her words hurt him as they had many years ago. Naturally, he gave no indication of that as he sat down and stared up at her with a bored expression. “Well then.”
But Angelina knew him too well to let his expression deceive her. “You can continue to try, but you’re not like the others. There’s something different about you. Like your mother—”
“You never knew my mother.”
She folded her arms. “Sometimes when I’m with you, I think I did.”
Ruby entered the room before he could reply. Angelina turned. “I’ll go check on James.”
Hunter gathered his anger as Ruby sat. “Are you the next shift to look after me?”
Ruby took no offense to his tone. “You should have told Brenna about Angie,” she said, quickly assessing the reason for Brenna’s departure.