By the time he’d spent fifteen minutes increasing his speed on the treadmill, Braam was beginning to get worried and annoyed. The noise of the air conditioning unit as it cut in and out irritated him. It showed the passing of time.
Where was she? Had she made her mind up he was too everything she didn’t like? Then he looked at the clock. It was still early and a good ten minutes before the time they had agreed on. That fact didn’t seem to help his mood. He poured a paper cone full of water, drank it, then dragged a couple of exercise mats and blanket into a heap next to the rowing machine. If she turned up at least it would be semi-comfortable to sit on.
If she turns up? Where is she?
He poured another cone full of water and thought of Debra. There was so much he wanted to learn about her and there was so little time. She would be leaving to go back to Scotland soon and goodness knows when he’d have time to go there to meet up with her again. Would it be fair to ask her to travel to wherever he happened to be, knowing they’d have to snatch time together? It was a dilemma he wasn’t sure they could solve.
Where the hell is she? Does she have to leave it to the last minute? Does she not want to be here with me? Why am I so pissy?
He knew why. Because it mattered.
The bell outside the gym door rang loudly. Braam swore as he was jerked out of his reverie and once more cold water dripped down his chest and onto his cock. Talk about déjà vu.
He stalked stiff-legged to the door and opened it wide. He was mad and could think of no reason why. If it was Debra, she was here. She’d turned up so why the chip on his shoulder? He had no idea.
Debra stared at him in wide-eyed disbelief.
He could imagine what he looked like. Sweaty and soaked, but luckily not sporting a hard-on. Not yet.
“I didn’t think you showered until you finished exercising. And even then you stripped out of your gym kit. Have I missed something?” Debra sauntered passed him and spun around to look him in the face.
Braam shut the door by the simple method of kicking it. It banged solidly and rattled the frame.
“Missed something? Now why would you think that?” He knew his voice was furious. Damn it, he
was
furious and he had no bloody idea why. She was dressed as he’d asked and looked hot. Her boobs were unfettered and enticed him to touch and feast. In all his wildest fantasies he hadn’t dared imagine that.
Get a grip.
“I have no idea,” Debra said in an even tone.
It made him want to throw something, anything, or rant and rave like a tantrum filled teen. And for why?
Too much too soon? Scared and pathetic?
“However, you look as if you can’t decide whether to screw me or show me the door. I’ll tell you what, let me decide for you, eh?”
He did? She was what?
“Who do you think you’re talking to? I’m not one of your kids you can order around.”
“No, my kids behave much more maturely, and I wouldn’t dream of ordering them to do anything. Sheesh.” She shook her head and the long dangly earrings he’d admired jangled. “Argh, fuck off, Braam. I don’t know what’s got stuck up your arse, but it’s got B—all to do with me.” She walked, very upright and with a determined step past him, then wrenched at the door. Her face was whiter than the pile of clean towels on the cupboard top and her red lips stood out, to accuse him of every awful thing imaginable.
Unfortunately for her, and damned lucky for him, he’d set the door to lock automatically.
“Open the fucking door, Braam.” Debra tugged and turned the handle, anger in every jerky movement she made.
“No. And you think that’s suitable language?” Why was he adding fuel to the fire? Did he have a death wish? No, he needed her to shoot him down, pick him up and be his.
“Oh, yes.”
Braam bit his angry retort back. She didn’t deserve it.
She spun back and that floaty skirt flicked way too high for his libido to cope with.
“Speak to the hand, buddy.” She gave him two fingers. “It’s all you’re fit for. What on earth is eating you? You asked me to turn up. I got out of my bed at silly o’clock and for what? A bucket of grief. What is
eating
you
?
And open the sodding door.” She kicked it with her trainer-covered foot and winced. “Sheesh, what’s it made of, concrete?”
The look she gave him would have felled a lesser man. The sheen of tears in her eyes felled him.
“Oh, God, Deb, I’m so sorry,” he said hoarsely. He walked across to her and tried to take her in his arms.
She brushed them away as if she was flicking a speck of dust and stared, stony-faced, at him.
“Go away. I have a mad. A big, hot in my gut, want to thump you mad.” She sniffed and dug in her pocket, to bring out a tissue and blow her nose. “Bastard.”
“You’re right, I am. You’ve done nothing wrong and everything right.” How on earth could he explain it, when he didn’t know himself what he was trying to explain? “It’s me and I’ve no idea why I’m like this. Well, except I’m scared you don’t feel the same way, worried how we’re going to sort the future out, concerned I’ll be sent to darkest wherever is farthest from you and I’m as horny as a rhino. Only for you, Deb, only for you. Please don’t go.” He finished in a flat monotone. “Hell, don’t cry. I’m not worth it.” Braam wiped his thumb across the tears under her eyes. It cut him so deeply to see her like this and know it was all down to him.
She bit her lip. “You, Mr. Van M, are an idiot. You so are. Worth it. We are.” She took hold of his hand and he folded his fingers around it. It was warm and soft and to his sorrow it shook. “But hello? This is hard. You make it almost impossible to, well, to get to know you. There’s a great big wall to climb and I’m scared of heights without a safety net.” She bit her lip and refused to look him in the eyes.
“Shit, Deb, am I such an ogre?” Braam was appalled at what he had done. “I scare you and make you shake?”
She stared him in the face. He couldn’t decipher her expression.
“Tell me,” he said as he looked at her and wished he could kick himself for causing the misery he could see in her eyes. “Please, for God’s sake, tell me.”
She sighed. “No, no ogre. Merely a complicated man who doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve. Break down the wall, Braam. Then tell me, what exactly do you want?”
“You,” he said instantly. “You, with me.”
She looked doubtful. How the hell could he reassure her?
“I know there’s no reason for you to believe me. If I knew why I was such an idiot, I’d tell you. I don’t have a dodgy past. I have no reason to block you out of my life. Well, except for some work-related stuff. But why should you trust my word? Especially after I’ve acted like I have today. For no good reason. Well, except that you matter.”
“Well you’ve got a crappy way of showing it.”
Debra stared at him for so long, Braam wanted to fidget. Finally she walked past him to the water cooler, filled a paper cone and turned back to him.
“I should throw this over you and walk away. After all, life is too short to back a loser. But you know?” she sighed. “I can’t.”
Braam let out the breath he hadn’t been aware he held and moved toward her. Debra held up her hand.
“Hold on. I expect more of a grovel.” She looked at him speculatively.
He grinned warily and was pleased when she half smiled back. Her face had lost its pinched look and the color that had leeched out when he’d torn into her was coming back.
“Mea culpa? I owe you chocolate?”
“That’s a mini grovel. I want a great big one.”
Braam got down on his knees in front of her. The floor was hard and he wondered whether he’d need help getting up. That would be enough to spoil any grand gesture. “I, Abraham Van Meister, do humbly grovel at the feet of Debra Scotburn. To apologize for my pissy, up myself mood and admit there was no reason for it except my own self-doubt. Not doubt about how I feel about her, which is very deeply, but myself. As in why me?”
“Hmm.” Debra knelt down next to him. “It’s a start. However, you still owe me chocolate. And something else.”
He hoped to hell she didn’t want to see him bleed. Because he knew his reputation would be shot to bits if she did. He went giddy at the sight of blood.
“Champagne? Dinner at Sun Tung Lok?” He named a nearby Michelin starred restaurant. “My head on a plate?”
“Maybe, oh wow and no, not your head or a plate.” Debra pinched his ear. “What I want…” She paused and tilted her head to one side. “Is…”
Braam held his breath.
“You.”
He swallowed. His mouth was dry and his skin clammy. “Me? As in…?” His words came out in a croak. Braam cleared his throat and began again. “I mean, how?”
“Like this.”
He could hardly believe his eyes. Debra looked around the gym and made a noise deep in her throat. He could only liken it to a purr.
“Over there, I think.” She pointed to the exercise mats and blanket he’d heaped together earlier. “I won’t make you crawl, although in the last book I read it sounded fun.”
Crawl?
“Oh, love, you’ve had me crawling this last half hour or so, believe me.”
“Then enough is enough.” Debra stood up and held her hand out to him. “I guess we can say we’ve had our first row?”
He nodded and wondered what she was thinking. The look on her face was serene and gave no indication of what was in her mind.
“Good then, now we need makeup sex.”
We do? Oh yes we
do.
“As in here and now makeup sex? I’m forgiven?”
“Well, once we have makeup sex you will be. So?”
“Love, you humble me.”
“No, no humbling, I want a big, strong man to take me to heaven again. And I’m sure you’re the man to do that. I’ve even brought something with me to help you.” Debra put her hand inside a pocket of her skirt he hadn’t noticed and brought out a foil packet. “In case you needed one.”
“Snap.” He slipped his fingers into the pocket sewn into the waistband of his running shorts. It was supposed to be for an MP3 player but it was very versatile. “In case my fantasy came true.”
Debra ran her fingers over the handle of the exercise bike. The tactile way she did it, made Braam wish he were the recipient not the bike. She looked at him from under her lowered lashes.
“And has it?”
“Not quite yet, but I live in hope. Your skirt plays a big part. So does the purple peril over there.” He nodded toward the colorful Pilates ball in the corner. His heart and his cock swelled as her eyes widened and she gave a slow and incredibly wicked grin.
“The Pilates ball? How?” She didn’t sound mad, but definitely interested.
“May I show you?” Braam stroked her cheek. The tiny touch was something he couldn’t have enough of. Her soft skin almost vibrated as he skimmed across the surface. She leaned into the curve of his palm and sighed a needy moan.
“Oh yeah.”
Funny how once you made your mind up to forgive, forget and act like an adult, things all slipped into place. Well, Debra amended in her mind, so far they had. There was one, much more important thing that needed to slip into place. His cock into her pussy. How that was going to happen and involve the Pilates ball, she had no idea. But was desperate to find out.
Oh, God, I’m acting like a sex-starved man-hungry predator. And I love it. Well not the predator bit and not the starved bit but, ohh, shut up.
Debra squashed her thoughts and let herself concentrate on Braam, his touch and the here and now.
A sudden thought made her slow down at the same time as Braam set off to take her toward the ball.
“The door?”
“Still locked,” Braam reassured her.
“People wanting to get in?”
“We don’t open today until eight. It’s one of the deep clean days.”
“Deep clean?”
He flicked her nose. “Where we do more than the everyday cleaning. Every other day, it’s almost like a shut up shop and repaint job. Without the paint. Enigma did it last night when it closed because he wants to go to his sister’s husband’s cousin’s son’s wedding celebrations early today. I said fine and I’d check it was all okay this morning for him.”
As much as she wanted to know the difference between a thorough clean and a deep clean and who Enigma was, Debra reckoned it could wait. She wanted to know the difference between making love and involving a Pilates ball and making love and not.
“Um, so you thought of everything? Ah, good. Oh yeah.”
“Well, I’m hoping you’ll agree it’s very good. I thought of so many things. How you’d look naked and on top of the massage table. Whether the vibrating plates over there would help or hinder us.” Braam had slipped his hand under her skirt. “How your skin would color and whether you get red all over and… Damn, Deb, it’s as well I wasn’t totally sure you were buck naked or I’d have had you over the seat of the weight bench ages ago.” He started to knead and stroke each globe of her ass, hard enough to send a shiver and a surge of red-hot arousal through her.
The weight bench?
“Ah, right, well I’m glad you didn’t. I’m much more interested in the Pilates ball. I’m sort of fond of purple.”
“I’ll be even fonder soon.” He rolled the ball around with the hand not playing with her rear. “How supple are you? Don’t look as if I’ve asked you if you can run down the central escalator whilst it’s going up.”
Debra closed her mouth that she’d let drop open at his question. Her? Supple? Actually, even though she wasn’t an exercise freak, she was reasonably fit. She enjoyed walking and although she didn’t do a lot of bending and lifting, what she did do, she did well. After all her protestations that exercise was a dirty word, she might be about to surprise him.
“Hmm, let me see. What about this?” She measured the distance in her mind and with a wink, lay face down over the ball with her ass in the air. She made sure her skirt barely covered her rear.
It was weird with her boobs squished against the PVC, her face dangling over the other side of the ball and her toes on the floor to give her any balance. Debra let her feet rise and fall so the ball moved forward and back a little.
The air conditioning cut out in its cycle. The silence was almost absolute. Except for the soft squeak of PVC on floor tiles, Braam’s sharp intake of breath and his reverent, “Oh my, yeah.”