Authors: Wahida Clark
Tags: #Urban, #African American, #General, #Fiction
“I have to give the police my statement, and then we are going to find a hotel. It’s chilly out here. Mr. Sinclair came over, and the kids are at his house.”
“Okay, when I get back I will thank him. But for now you need to go to our other house.”
“I’m not going there. That’s exactly where the bitch wants me to go.”
“What? What bitch?” My wife was sounding crazy.
“Charli. Who else? Plus, I am not going to the same house and sleep in the same bed where you fucked another bitch!”
“Tasha, don’t start that bullshit. I told you I did not fuck her in that house.”
“We are checking into a hotel, Trae.”
“Don’t take my kids to no damn hotel. Now is not the time to be talking crazy, Tasha.”
“Crazy? How come the guy we saw looking around the house looked Chinese? Who else do you know would want to burn us down to the ground? Our kids were in that house, Trae.”
“Not Charli. Somebody else, for some other shit I did, but not her.”
“Oh, that’s right. She loves you too much. She wouldn’t dare try to burn your ass down to the ground. Trae, you need to open your eyes. That bitch was behind this.”
“You’re trippin’, Tasha. I don’t think she would do that.”
“I know you can’t be that stupid. Who do you think you are talking to? You know what? I am not about to argue with you. We going to a hotel and I will call you when we get checked in.”
“Tasha, I—Tasha!” She hung up on me. And shit was going from worst to extreme. I had to get the fuck home and deal with not only these pending charges, but now a fire. Who the fuck would be crazy enough to come for my family?
“I don’t believe this! You idiotic imbecile! My instructions to you were to blow up the car with her and the children. Not the house!” Yao, who worked for our family, stood in my foyer, expecting to get some sympathy from me.
“No, Ms. Li. You didn’t specify. House. Car. Boat. Your instructions were to handle it as I saw fit,” Yao said.
“But did you handle it? Of course not! The house is still standing. The car is still there. The wife and kids are still breathing!”
“I don’t know what happened. The C4 had to be defective.”
“C4? C4? Yao, you used C4 to blow up a house? Why would you do that? You fool! No wonder everyone is still alive. Yao, please don’t tell me you left the explosives? Defective explosives! What about your prints? Serial numbers? C4 can be traced.”
“I wore gloves. No prints, Ms. Li.”
I was beside myself. If some harm would have come to Mr. Macklin, I don’t know what I would have done. What Yao had done over and over again, with precision, this time was a fiasco. He killed people for a living and rarely made mistakes. Why he would use C4 to blow up a house was beyond me. He was beginning to lose his touch. “Yao, you’d better hope that this does not come back to haunt us.”
“Ms. Li, you know better than myself that things don’t always go as planned. I can carry out and complete the assignment tomorrow.”
“No. Please. Let me rethink this.” I grabbed my head with both hands. “Excuse yourself, and see your way out.”
Devastated. Betrayed. Torn to pieces
. A few words that came close to how I was feeling. Shocked and appalled was how I felt when I pulled up into that driveway and saw my man fucking some bitch on the porch. But then, when I got close and saw it was her . . . my knees got weak, and I just knew I had died and gone to hell. My worst nightmare and fear had come to fruition. I wish I could have run that bitch over with my car. Our life was better when she was dead. It took me too long to get this nigga over her. Now I am back to square one.
Kyra “the dead bitch” Blackshear. She will wish she was dead if she doesn’t fall back from fuckin’ with my man.
But this shit is not going to go away. I could tell by the look on Rick’s face. The nigga didn’t even want to leave the bitch. And it was obvious that he felt obligated to me, not out of love but out of responsibility and that broke my heart. I really hit rock bottom when
I got back into my truck and waited for Rick to take off and leave her right then and there. But instead, he came to the car and tried to calm me down, along with some
it ain’t what it seems
bullshit.
Niggas
. You can catch them with the dick up in the pussy, and they will still say, “It ain’t what it looks like.” So when he didn’t leave right then, I already knew I had lost him. And believe it or not, I accepted it, only because I knew that this would happen. Maybe subconsciously, I brought it on myself.
Now, two days later, he was back home, or I should say here with me. I couldn’t stand the sight of him. As far as I was concerned, this was no longer his home, and I was hoping he’d pack his shit and leave. Hell, this wouldn’t be the first time a nigga packed up and left me.
“Nina, can I talk to you for a minute?” He popped into the laundry room, where I was washing clothes. I acted like I didn’t hear him.
“Nina, you gonna talk to me or what?”
“Go talk to the bitch who just returned from the dead. I’m still trying to figure out why you’re here. I know you don’t think you’re going to have us both?”
“Nina, stop.”
“Stop?” I turned around to face him. “Stop? Rick, do you realize that I am this close to telling you to pack your shit and get out of my life? This is so not fair! I loved you. You got me pregnant. You put a ring on my finger. My kids call you Daddy. This house here, we turned into a home, together. You fixed up the baby room, for God’s sake. I trusted myself with you. I allowed myself to feel safe.” I choked up. “I knew this was going to happen. Why did you lie to me?” I started sobbing as I slid down against the dryer onto the floor.
He came over to me and bent down. He held my face in his hands. “I didn’t lie. She’s been in the hospital in a coma.”
“And you just popped up and found her?” I had to laugh at that one.
“Crazy as that may sound, that’s exactly what happened. And that’s the truth. Nina, you should know by now that I would never hurt you intentionally, and I never lied to you.”
“You already did hurt me intentionally. You fucked her, Rick. The entire time we’ve been together I know you secretly wished she wasn’t dead. You wished that bitch back to life. And that hurts. My heart use to have love in it for you but now I hate you. I hate you for what you did to my love for you. I trusted you. All of my trust for you went out the window. I have to face reality. There is nothing left.”
“What do you mean there ain’t nothing left?”
“Typical question from a nigga who wants the cake and the icing. Rick, your story is whack as fuck I don’t give a damn if they posted that bitch on the side of the milk carton saying she was found alive, apparently our love was never shit. How could you do this to me, Rick?”
“Nina.”
“Nina, Nina, what? ‘
It’s not what it seems!
’ Rick, you were fucking her, and then you spent the night with her. You didn’t come home with me! How do you think that makes me feel, Rick? How am I supposed to compete with her?”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Now you’re lying again! Go! Just get the fuck out of my life!”
It sent chills up my spine just to hear Mr. Macklin’s voice. Don’t act surprised. You read my diary excerpts,
50 Shades of Trae
. You know my feelings for him.
I can honestly say that I am at peace with myself. It took a while, but finally I’m here.
The loss of our baby was both bitter and sweet. Sweet because I was under the impression for years that I couldn’t get pregnant. But I did. Bitter because my father would never approve of me having a baby out of wedlock. And definitely not by someone my father would consider a common thug. He wanted me to marry a leader of a country. Royalty.
I knew that when I was ready to reach out to Mr. Macklin again, it had to be worthwhile. I didn’t know of anyone to use better than my father to get his attention. And it just so happened that my father was looking to expand one of his operations, and he needed someone. So I decided to suggest Mr. Macklin. Now all I had to do was persuade Father to bring him in.
I tapped on the door to my father’s study.
“Come in, my little one.”
I eased the door open. “Father, how did you know it was me?”
“I can always sense your presence.” He got up from behind his desk and met me. We hugged, and he kissed my forehead. I stood back and bowed.
“Father, I have an idea that you may be interested in.” I sat in one of the chairs in front of his desk.
“It’s Sunday, little one. Your day off. This must be a grand idea!” He teased me.
I got right down to business. “I found someone to be trained for our operation in the Midwest. If we continue to keep things the way they are, we will continue to see our profits diminish. Obviously, no one is taking Kon Li seriously. My recommendation is already familiar with the work, he learns fast, he’s hungry,
and you wouldn’t have to worry about him double-crossing the operation.”
“Why
wouldn’t
he double-cross the operation? What stakes in our organization would he have?”
“First off, he’s not built like that. He has morals. He understands and lives by our code. Also, there’s me. There is a small bond between him and me. Or should I say, more of an unspoken bond.”
“Sounds as if you are pretty familiar with this candidate. And I must admit, you have me curious.”
“I only ask that you give him a fair chance, Father. And don’t hold his past against him.”
“So, you are vouching for him?”
“I am, but I have some conditions.”
“Who is he? Tell me.”
“Trae Macklin.”
My father swiveled in his chair, turning his back to me.
I stood up and went over to my father with my head and my voice low. “Yes, I do still have feelings for him. With him under your wing, you can make sure he is the man who is fit for your daughter. Father, I rarely ask you for anything. So you can grant me this one request.”
He spun around to face me, with the look of disappointment evident on his face. “You can’t be serious. You almost lost your life because of this man. We lost one of our most trusted soldiers, who was also my friend and most trusted confidant, because of him. And have you forgotten that the man is married? Charli, I’m going to ask you to rethink this. Not only is your suggestion absurd, but you are asking me to groom him so that you can marry him? Charli, he is already married. And if he wasn’t, I still would never even consider such a thing. This man is beneath you.”
“Father, have you forgotten that you owe me one? And you gave me your word, remember? Your honor is all that you have. Keep your word, Father, or disgrace the honor of this family.”
My father laughed. “I owe you? And me bring disgrace to the honor of this family? Little one, have you forgotten that I built this family? You are only here because of the work of these hands.” He held both of them up for emphasis. “And now you want me to honor a thug?”
“Father—”
“Your judgment is clouded, little one. And that explains the stunt that you assigned Yao to. Never do that again.”
“Father, I can explain. It was supposed to be her car, with her and her kids in it. She killed my baby. Why do hers get to live?” I tried to assert myself.
“Charli, Charli, Charli. Leave me now.”
I wanted to plead my case some more but decided against it. I obviously had bad timing. But I was not done with this. My father owed me, and this was how he was going to repay me. Whether he liked it or not. I was in love with Trae Macklin and I wanted him to be a permanent part of my world. And this was my way of getting one step closer. I stood, bowed, and walked out.
It was seven thirty in the morning, and I had been out walking for an hour, trying to clear my head. I had left Jaz and Faheem in Atlanta. I told Faheem that he was hot, and he needed to wait a while before he made any moves. He agreed but
admitted that it was going to be hard. I know that I wouldn’t be able to just chill either and let none them muthafuckas breathe. But I know from past experience that when you move on emotions you fuck up. His head isn’t clear and he needs to calm down and think this thing out. The police in the A is a lot different from the ones up north. They will crawl up your ass with a microscope until they get whatever they want to arrest and charge you with.
Tasha was mad at me because she lost the last argument. Marva and Kyra were still at the hotel, but I made Tasha and the kids go to the other house. She was walking around pissed. However, I really didn’t give a fuck. I never fucked Charli in our bed. Maybe on the couch, but the bed? Never that!
As far as the house, the upstairs only had smoke damage and a little water damage. But downstairs, everywhere except for the kitchen was ruined. The furniture, carpets, walls—all ruined. I had the contractors working around the clock renovating and remodeling. We should be back in there in about two to three weeks. Actually, as far as the house was concerned, I was simply going through the motions. I already had a Realtor looking at something in Texas or maybe wherever Faheem was going. The safety of my family was first, and California was no longer appearing to be a safe haven.
I loved the early-morning California brisk air, and as I inhaled it deeply, it was at that moment that I made up my mind to make a run to New York. I needed to see Kay. It was time for me to handle Kyron. I’d allowed the nigga to breathe as long as I possibly could, and it was now eating at me to the point where I could hardly think about anything else.
I noticed the same black limo whiz by me for the second time
as I decided it was time to head back to the house. I began walking faster, while thinking that I wasn’t even strapped. I looked back, and the stretch was making a U-turn and coming back toward me.
Shit!
I was out in the open. There was nowhere to get cover except in someone’s driveway behind their car. That’s when it hit me.
Charli.
And then the ride slowed down, and the rear window went down. That’s when I thought,
Here it comes
.