Honor Thy Thug (29 page)

“I can’t . . . I’m scared, Kay. Not like this! We can’t go out like this!” She started squirming around.

“Red! Stop that!”

“Tell me we are gonna make it out of this. Just tell me we are gonna make it!” she cried.

I wanted to say,
I got this. We are going to be okay. I’ll get us out of this
. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t bring myself to utter those words, and it was killing me. I felt like I had died already, realizing that I had no way of getting us out of this situation.

Red had stopped sobbing, anticipating my response. My mind went blank. The only thing I could blurt out was, “I love you, baby. If this is the way we are gonna go, I’ll rest in peace knowing that I’m lying here with you. Sorry, baby, that’s all your man got.”

Once again, her tears began to wet my face as she kissed my lips. “I love you, too.”

Silently, I began to pray.

“You hear that?” Red asked. “I hear sirens.”

“Babe, I don’t hear shit but them niggas up there and dirt slamming down on top and around us.”

“I hear them!” Red was starting to get delusional.

The dirt stopped coming.

Those niggas must have heard the sirens, too. “Yo, Herb, you think they coming here? They sound like they mighty close.” I heard those words vaguely.

“I’m not going to stay here and find out. We can come back and finish this later. They can’t climb out. Let’s bounce.”

The sirens were getting closer. But were they coming for us? We heard car doors slam, the engine crank up, and tires screech away.

I was gaining weight and experiencing morning sickness, which was, in my warped mind, confirmation that this was Trae’s baby. With his babies, the morning sickness damn near killed me. When I was pregnant by Kyron, I had no problems. My stomach was getting pudgy, but I had decided it would be best to hide it as long as I could. The hardest part was hiding it from Aunt Marva, since she was always around the house. Kyra was so caught up in her little world, I could be ready to deliver, and she would never know the difference. When I would go visit Trae, I would throw on a pair of Spanks and tight jeans.

The last visit, I had brought a cell phone for Trae. I left it exactly where this guard they called Dirty Harry told me to.

Now I was sitting in the waiting room ready to go in, when Benny came and sat down beside me. He startled me. “Benny? What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been here since seven this morning. Come walk with me. I need some fresh air.”

“They are getting ready to call my name, Benny!”

“No, I don’t think so. Come on, and take a walk with me.”

Oookay
. Something wasn’t right. I stood and began walking to catch up with Benny. “Is something going on that I should know about?”

He waited until we got outside away from everybody before he spoke. “They are getting ready to transfer Trae out of this country club and send him to the county lockup.”

“Why? What did he do?”

“He allegedly killed a guy.”

“He did what? Why? Is he okay?”

“The guard Dirty Harry, who everybody uses for their contraband, got busted. So this guy was talking shit to Trae, telling him it was his fault and that his woman was the cause, yadda yadda yadda. They exchanged words, he threatened Trae, they got into it, and Trae allegedly strangled him with his bare hands.”

This was a little bit too much for me to handle. “Benny. So what does this mean?”

“It means that he has a brand-new murder charge, but of course, he argues self-defense.”

“I gotta go talk to Trae.” I turned around to leave.

“I doubt they will let you in,” he called out.

I kept walking. I needed to see my husband. Another murder charge? He had me fucked up! Here I was, pregnant with three kids at home. I needed his ass out here. We both fucked up, yes. But he didn’t need to go and fuck up some more.

What a night! Red and I didn’t leave the police station until about seven thirty that next morning. Once we left there, we had to get Angel’s head looked at. Thank god it was just bruised. After the doctor cleaned and wrapped it, we were on our way home.

While driving, I couldn’t help but reflect on how if E, our artist, hadn’t seen them put us in that car, we would have been fucked. Hell, as far as we were concerned, we were gone. As I lay in that fuckin’ box, pitch-black, with Red on top of me, there was no doubt in my mind that it was over. I couldn’t see her face but could feel the tears rolling down her cheeks. The sound of her voice cracking as she said, “I love you.” The way she said it was as if it was the last time those words would ever leave those sweet lips. I couldn’t even give her a comforting hug, because my hands were tied. That was the moment when, as a man, my pride kicked in. Hell, my ego was totally crushed as I lay helpless, not able to do shit to rescue my wife. I had failed. I had failed as a husband and a father, and I got mad as fuck. All I could do at that point was pray. “Lord, if you get me out of this situation . . . I don’t know how you can do it, but if you get me out, I’m gonna kill that nigga, and that’s my word on my seed.” That was a hell of a prayer to pray, but that’s what was in my heart.

Jahara spent the night at my moms’, and we decided it would be best to let her stay over there for now. Plus, I didn’t want to be around Mama Santos. Once she started asking questions, it would be hard to sit there and be in her face. It was very hard to lie to Mama Santos. I couldn’t tell her that her own son, our flesh and blood, had tried to bury me alive.

As soon as we got into the house, we both rushed to hit the water. I scrubbed from head to toe. I had dirt in my eyes, ears,
nose, fingernails . . . everywhere. After we cleaned up, we jumped into the bed. Angel curled up under me, and I could hear her sniffling. I didn’t say anything. That was an experience that we would never forget. I didn’t even think anyone would believe what happened to us. In a weird way, I was glad that we experienced that together. It made our bond that much tighter.

“We almost lost our lives today, Kaylin.”

“Yeah, but you could have avoided the whole situation. That was some dumb shit that you did out there. You should have left when the opportunity presented itself. Jahara could have lost both of her parents. What were you thinking?”

“What do you think I was thinking? I wasn’t going to leave you. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself, remembering how I left you and remembering the last time I saw you. You were being shoved into the backseat of a car. Either way, I was damned.”

“Angel, don’t you ever do that shit again. The only thing I’ll allow you to do is get into a car and follow me. I couldn’t have been able to rest in peace, knowing that I was the cause of your death. Plus, our daughter needs you.”

“Allow me? Allow me?” She sat up.

“Yes, allow. I’m thinking about our daughter, Angel.”

“Well, our daughter needs her father, and I need my husband.” She started bawling. “Why are you making me choose? Our vows said ‘till death do us part.’ I can’t live without you, Kaylin. There is no way in that situation I would have been able to choose.”

I didn’t know what to say. All I could do was hold her tight. I tried to look at it from her point of view, but I wasn’t seeing it.

“They’re gonna come after us again, aren’t they?” she asked me.

“Not if I go after them first.”

“Baby, what have you been hiding from me? Who are they?”

“Nobody. Don’t worry about it. I’m just venting, that’s all.”

“No, you’re not, Kaylin. I know you better than that. You know exactly who was behind this. And you’re going to tell me. Kaylin, you can’t be around me twenty-four/seven. If the enemy is coming my way, I need to be able to identify him. Don’t leave me out here like this.”

She was right, but I didn’t want to tell her just yet. “Red, you’re worrying about the wrong shit.”

“Oh, am I? You know what? Forget it.”

My wife jumped up, snatching all of the covers off of the bed, and stormed out of the bedroom. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her that my own brother was the one who had sentenced us to death.

“Macklin! You have a visitor.”

I turned away from the small window that allowed me to see the sunlight and walked over to the steel door. “Do I have to get cuffed up?”

“Just leg irons. In case you haven’t noticed, you are in the hole now. So they are mandatory.”

“Aiight, Officer Smart Ass.” The door popped open, and Officer Smart Ass motioned for me to turn around. I didn’t understand why I needed cuffs on my legs and not on my wrists. Where the fuck was I going to run? To the other end of the tier? He put them on and motioned for me to step out of the cell. I walked down the hall to the small room that housed the window visits and sat in the first booth. Tasha was heading toward me. I picked up the black phone, wiped it against my jumper, and
placed it to my ear. Tasha picked up hers and wiped it down with a Clorox wipe.

“From the look on your face, I gather that Benny filled you in.”

“You gathered right, mister. Seriously, Trae, a new murder charge? And the county jail? You know what? It doesn’t even matter, because I’m not bringing your sons to see you at some damn, filthy county jail. I made sure Benny found you someplace decent where you could be comfortable and you wouldn’t have to get into trouble,” Tasha ranted.

“Get into trouble? Tasha, this shit ain’t grade school. And even though that spot was laid-back, it was still a jail, and it still had niggas in it. And niggas are gonna try you. If I got put in that same situation again, I would do it again.”

“Then you know what? You’re gonna do this shit by yourself. Call me at the house!”

“What do you mean, call you at the house?”

“Just what I said.” She stood up. “You think this shit is fuckin’ cute? I told you, I’m not doing county time. Call me at the house.” She slammed the phone down and walked out. Spoiled bitch.

Almost two weeks since the graveyard incident, but here I was. I was alive. Edgy, but I was alive.

It took me a few days to get in touch with Don Carlos, but obviously, I had perfect timing. He was vacationing out in Santa Barbara at the Bacara Resort and invited me to come out. I saw this as the perfect opportunity to snatch up my ten-year-old son, Malik, Jahara and Red. I had to admit, that near-death incident was a wakeup call. Life can be cut short at any time. So enjoy it
while you can. Make it count. Relish every moment with those you care about the most.

Angel and the kids were somewhere on the beach. Don Carlos and I were strolling past the flower-filled gardens on our way to the 12,000-bottle wine cellar. Don Carlos was one Latino boss who loved his wines and knew them well.

The Santa Ynez Mountains were breathtaking. Seventy-two degrees in October got no complaints from me. This was perfect weather. The crystal-clean air had me feeling like a brand-new man.

I looked over at Don Carlos. Mama Santos said he reminded her of the actor, Danny Trejo, just taller.

“Kaylin, you gentlemen are like sons to me. You know that, don’t you?”

“Yes, I do.”

“You were always the most level-headed out of everybody, and for you to come bringing me this news lets me know that no one is no longer in control.”

“That’s not true, Don Carlos, that’s why I’m here. I wanted to let you know what moves I wanted to make before I made them. If you give me your blessings and your guidance, you will see that everything will remain under control. I just need you to hear me out.” The warm breeze was blowing the scent of a salty Pacific Ocean, tickling my nostrils. I made a mental note to bring Mama Santos out here for a little rest and relaxation, even if I had to drag her.

“I’m listening,” Don Carlos said, interrupting my thoughts.

“Let me start with my brother Kyron. He was recently charged with rape.”

“Rape?” Don Carlos retorted. “You know that is against the rules.”

“Of course, I do. But he told me that because of you, he was untouchable. He slipped something into a drink that belonged to Trae’s wife and did whatever he wanted to do to her. When I confronted him about it, he felt I was betraying him by taking sides with Trae. He then sent his men after me, took my wife and me to a graveyard to have us buried alive.”

“He touched another man’s wife?” Don Carlos raised his voice slightly. I could tell that he didn’t like the sound of that, even though I thought Trae had told him when it first happened. He paused for a moment, then asked. “And bury you and your wife alive? Why are you still here?”

“One of my artists saw us being taken away, followed us, and called the police. They found us right as the dirt was being tossed on top of us.”

“Ay-yi-yi, Kaylin, if I didn’t know that you were an honest and loyal man, I would think that you were making this up.”

“I wish I was making this up, Don Carlos. Now back to Trae.”

“Trae! Trae! My hardest-working hot-headed one. He really disappointed me, going over to the Li organization after he kept telling me he wanted out.”

“Let me explain.”

“He should be here explaining on his own behalf.”

“He’s incarcerated right now.”

“Kaylin Santos, you bring me more problems in one day than I have had to deal with all year.”

“Yes, but when I find a solution to a problem, it always is to your benefit, Don Carlos.”

“Thank heavens for that, Kaylin. My old heart can only take but so much.”

“I must admit, Trae went over to the Li organization because
of greed, yes. But Mr. Li’s daughter, who has a thing for Trae, made it all possible. Without her, he wouldn’t have been able to penetrate their walls. Trae was working on something to benefit us all. But he has a situation where his fingerprints showed up at the wrong place, and he was charged with murder. Mr. Li offered to have those charges removed in exchange for him working for the organization. Trae agreed, but when Mr. Li’s daughter got hurt, he blamed Trae and dismissed him from the organization.”

“And let me guess. He takes back everything that he offered.”