Hooded Man (46 page)

Adele leaned on the counter, watching him pick up the final pieces of glass. “You’re joking? You really had me back there. And the way you tackled those hooligans back in York!”

Robert put the glass in a bin. “It was nothing.” That sounded better in his head than it did out loud. Why didn’t you go the whole way and add,
aw shucks
? “It’s what I do. Well, what I did.”

“Did?”

Robert joined her at the counter, then rounded the other side – partly to fetch another couple of glasses, partly to put a physical barrier between them. He poured her some water and she sipped it gladly. But she wasn’t going to be distracted. “You said
did
, past tense?”

Robert took a swig of his own water. “It’s just that lately I’ve felt like I’m not doing any good anymore.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m stuck here all the time. Organising.”

“Then if it makes you feel like this, perhaps you shouldn’t be.” Adele put the glass down and absently ran her finger around the rim. “I’ve always been a big believer in following your heart.” She looked up at him. “What’s it telling you?”

“That’s the thing: it’s not telling me anything. Or at least nothing I can trust.” Robert let out a breath. “I don’t know why I’m dumping all this on you. I barely even know you.”

Adele smiled again. “Sometimes it’s easier to talk to a stranger than someone... Well, you know.”

Robert nodded. “I guess it is.”

“This Mary you’re with,” said Adele after a pause. “She seems really nice.”

“She is,” Robert said without hesitation, then took another drink.

“It’s really late. I should be at least trying to get some rest, I suppose. Not that it’s easy in a new place.”

“If it helps, you’re safe now.”

“That why you’re so on edge, jumping at shadows?”

Robert laughed softly. “You have a point.”

“And you should try and get some sleep as w –” She let out a yelp, sucking in air through her teeth as she hobbled backwards.

“What? What is it?” Robert had rounded the counter in seconds.

Adele was hopping towards a chair, clutching her foot. “I don’t think you got all the glass.”

“Oh, no, hold on...” He brought one of the candles from the counter, placing it on the floor as he crouched down and took hold of her heel. “Let me have a look. I can’t see anyth... wait, there it is.” Holding Adele’s foot steady, Robert squeezed the area and drew out the splinter. “It needs washing. We don’t want it to get infected.”

Adele looked down at him. “You really are sweet, you know, Hooded Man or not. I hope Mary knows how lucky she is.”

O
NCE
M
ARY HAD
begun to cry, she couldn’t stop.

All the tension, the stress, the worry flooded out of her – not just from tonight’s argument, but from the days preceding it. Waiting to see whether the man she loved more than life itself would come back to her.

And when he did, what had she done? She hadn’t even given him a kiss, she was too busy firing off questions, checking for injuries (she hadn’t seen the worst of them till he’d undressed, his back a mass of bruises), giving him a hard time about bringing the woman he’d saved back to their home. What was she, some kind of jealous teenager?

But then, she’d never done the whole teen in love thing. Hers had been a small locality and, apart from break times at school, she hadn’t really mixed with boys. She certainly hadn’t been able to go out in the evenings; her brother, who’d looked after her when their father had died of a stroke, would have gone mad.

Damn right I would, Moo-Moo
, said the voice of that dead sibling in her head; the one she still heard occasionally, even though David had died from the virus long ago. And who still called her by that ridiculous childhood name.
So would Dad, if he’d still been alive.

In some ways it had been a drawback, living with two men, all that way out on the farm. But it had made her the woman she was today; taught her to fight and stand up for herself.

But in fighting for Robert, maybe she was also pushing him away. If you love something, you have to let it go – isn’t that what people always said? But you run the risk of them never coming back.

To her mind, the jealousy was justified anyway. It hadn’t been easy for her, competing initially with the ghost of Robert’s late wife – the one he’d loved so much he cut himself off from civilisation – and then with this
character
people thought he was; this symbol of hope. It was tough being in love with an icon.

Though probably not as tough as actually being one, Moo-Moo. You should cut him a little slack every now and again.

“What are you talking about?” Mary caught herself saying out loud.

Remember when I asked you if you were sure about him?

Mary nodded.

Well, you were right. He risked everything to save you when you pulled that stunt impersonating him.

“He’d have done the same for anyone. He just did for that woman he brought back.”

It’s not the same thing, and you know it. He came after you because of how he feels. Not out of any sense of duty. But you’re in danger of losing him, unless you’re careful.

“I don’t need relationship advice from someone who never had a date in his life.”

Suit yourself, Moo-Moo. Just trying to help.

He was right, of course. Robert had come after her that day because he loved her. She’d seen the way he’d fought when De Falaise took her captive.

And even though the months after that had been hard, Robert moving from Sherwood to the castle, them trying to build something up out of the aftermath of the Sheriff’s rule – both in the Rangers, and between themselves – there had still been moments to cherish.

Like the first night they spent together, after last year’s summer fête. Jack had the notion that it would be good to give the men and their new family a party, and though Robert had been resistant at first he’d finally been persuaded by Mary.

“We could all use a bit of... what was it Jack said? ‘Down Time,’” she’d told him.

The grounds of the castle had been open to all that day, with food and drink and music; some provided by a battery-powered stereo, some by Dale and his guitar. People from New Hope and other villages under Robert’s protection had visited Nottingham, and said afterwards it had been well worth the trip. It showed that not everything in this post-virus world had gone sour. They were still alive after all, and still human. Even Robert, who’d been on tenterhooks waiting for one emergency or other, had loosened up after a couple of drinks.

“Come on,” Mary had said, after some Dutch courage herself. “Dance with me.”

Robert shook his head, so she’d leaned in then, whispering in his ear. “Please.”

He’d allowed himself to be pulled up, and when he held her he relaxed. Several dances, and several beers later, they’d found themselves walking through the grounds of the castle, alone in the moonlight. She’d pointed up at the stars and when he looked down again she’d kissed him. Not the kisses they’d shared since first meeting, the awkward, tentative brushes they were used to – but a long, lingering kiss. Mary had felt her body turn to jelly as Robert responded: his hands on her back, hers clutching his shoulders.

When both their hands started to explore further, they’d pulled apart – and it had been Robert, surprisingly, who’d suggested they find somewhere a little more private. “Maybe there’s a room where people have left their coats,” he suggested, and she’d laughed, feeling truly happy for the first time in a long while. Though she should have been scared at her first time, Mary was far from it. Even if things had felt uncomfortable before, nothing on that special night did. It felt right, so right.

Sure, she could put it down to the alcohol, the atmosphere of the party. But to her it just felt like they were finally on the same page. That now he wanted her as much as she’d always wanted him. And it had been amazing, truly amazing. She’d placed herself in Robert’s hands and he hadn’t failed to live up to her imagination.

Then, waking up that morning with Robert lying next to her, she’d experienced a horrible sinking feeling. What if he regrets what we did? What if he rejects me? She’d kept quiet, frozen, just watching – waiting for him to rouse, but at the same time hoping he’d sleep forever so she wouldn’t have to face the disappointment.

What a relief, then, when he’d woken up and smiled.

“Hello, sweetheart,” she said.

His smile had widened.

Yay me
, she’d said to herself.

It was a million miles away from sitting here in that same bed and crying her heart out. When she thought back to those first couple of months of being together, properly together, it just made her feel worse. They’d spent as much time as they possibly could in each other’s company, working around schedules, finding private moments. Most of the castle – and most of Robert’s men – knew. Had to, by the daft grins on both their faces.

Lately, though, they’d spent less and less time together... especially in that way. Admittedly, Robert had been worrying about this cult – and who could blame him? She had been busy too, dealing with the day-to-day running of the castle, tending to injured men coming back from patrols with nursing skills she’d built on since Robert had found her at her farm; studying from text books she and the men brought back, teaching those same skills to others. They were both tired and, more often than not, would just go to sleep at night.

She’d read about this in women’s magazines and glossies delivered with the weekend papers, back before the world changed. The problem pages were full of stuff about ‘honeymoon periods’ and what happens afterwards when real life intrudes. And although Mary knew this was meant to signal them being more comfortable with each other – solid couples didn’t have to show affection like that all the time – she couldn’t help feeling more than a little unwanted.

At the same time he was growing increasingly distant. It came to a head when he’d begun training again, working out to try and get fit; exercising muscles that had grown flabby from lack of use.

Then one day he announced he was going out with the patrol again, going out to assess the threat of the cult personally. They hadn’t even discussed it, and it had thrown her completely.

“Why, Robert? Why you? And why now? Jack can –”

“I’m going, Mary. And that’s that.”

They’d rowed, he’d stormed off, and he’d left without even saying goodbye. Maybe she should have been more laid back – after all, he’d been leading a band of men when she first met him, fighting De Falaise’s troops. But he’d also got himself blown up that day, would probably have died if she hadn’t been there to tend to his wounds. She couldn’t shake that image from her mind – of him unconscious in the back of the truck, on his way to Sherwood...

He’d recovered, of course, faster really than he should have. But what if he didn’t next time? What if she had to cradle his head as he died? What if she didn’t even get the chance to say goodbye?

It was why she’d pulled that ‘stunt,’ as her brother called it: drugging Robert and taking his place for the final battle with the Sheriff. She’d wanted to keep him safe, that’s all. Wanted to protect the man she loved.

He can look after himself, David had told her, and she knew deep down he was right.

That didn’t stop her worrying. And none of this would help them get back to how they’d been during those summer and autumn months.

Mary dried her eyes with the bed sheets, then got out and wrapped her robe around her. She’d go down and drag him back to bed if she had to, talk to him, maybe do more than that. Show him how much she’d missed him, how much she still loved him.

He’d said he was going for a drink of water, which he often did when he couldn’t sleep. She knew she’d find him in the café, probably looking out through those big windows.

Mary stopped dead in her tracks when she heard voices from inside. Two voices: one Robert’s, the other a woman’s. As she drew closer, keeping quiet, she saw them inside. Lit by candles, they were sitting at one of the tables. Mary realised she could have marched past with a brass band and they wouldn’t have noticed, they were so wrapped up in conversation. Though try as she might, she couldn’t hear what was being said.

The woman with Robert –
her
Robert – had her back to Mary. But she knew who it was, even without the short hair.

Right, that does it... I’m going to...

Do what, Moo-Moo, storm in there and make a fool of yourself? They’re only talking.

I know, but –

But nothing. Leave it, sis.

David was right. Again. There was no way she could make her presence known that didn’t look like she was spying on them. Checking up on Robert. Dammit, right now that’s exactly what she
was
doing.

Mary watched them for a little while longer, but had to turn away when she heard Adele laughing at something Robert had just said. So happy. Just like Mary had been the night of the fête.

Feeling the tears coming again, she retreated to their bedroom, where she waited. Not for Robert to come back from patrol this time, but for him to return to her. If he ever would.

Mary tried to stay awake, but eventually sheer exhaustion and all that crying took their toll. Sleep claimed her, and she never heard Robert come in, or felt him climb into bed with her.

If she had she might also have heard him tell her again softly, as he kissed her shoulder, how very much he loved her.