Roper had to laugh at that. “I know better than you think. I know exactly what falling short means. I know what it’s like to disappoint my family and my teammates. I know what it’s like to have fans boo me from the stands and throw things at me onto the field. I deal with criticism from everyday people on the street and from the media. I can’t name one source I don’t get shit from, so don’t tell me I don’t know what it’s like to lose. The difference between us is that I’m not afraid to step up to the plate. Whatever plate that may be. If I had to walk away today, I’d be damn happy to have a coaching job, Ben. No joking here.”
He blew out a stream of air, shocked at how direct and hard he’d been with his brother.
He glanced at Ben, who appeared stunned, too.
“I’m sure that’s easier to say with money in the bank,” Ben muttered.
“I put that money in the bank.” He jabbed himself in the chest. “I earned it. When your father took off and mine was nowhere to be found, all I could think about was stepping up and making sure the family was taken care of. I mowed lawns while Mom worked. I did what I had to and I never asked a damn thing in return. But I’m asking now.
No, I’m telling you now. Grow the fuck up. Get a job and hold your head up high for once,” Roper said, his heart accelerating in his chest.
Ben looked as if Roper had slapped him.
“What’s going on in here?” Cassandra asked, walking inside to join them.
Roper glanced at his younger brother. “Nothing. Give us another minute, okay, Mom?”
Cassandra nodded. “Just stop with the raised voices or I’ll be thrown out of here and then—” Her eyes lit up. “Then I can find a place where Harrison will never think to look!” she said, the idea obviously just forming.
Roper shook his head and groaned. “Remember your contract, Mom. We’ll talk in five minutes. Don’t do anything until then,” he warned her.
She laughed and walked out, probably already planning.
Roper quickly turned back to his brother. “Ben—”
“Not now. You’ve said enough.” Arms folded over his chest, he looked like the hurt little boy Roper remembered. It took everything Roper had to steel himself against the manipulation.
“Listen, Ben, my point is this. You have more inside you than you give yourself credit for. You could do a world of good coaching kids.
You could tap into their psyches—those that already believe in themselves and those that don’t but should. You can steer them in the right direction from the start.” He placed a hand on his brother’s shoulder.
Ben shook it off.
Roper swallowed back the hurt, knowing he had to let things settle and hope someday his brother would come around. “Let’s go join Mom and Sabrina,” Roper said.
“Why bother? I’m finished here.” Roper waited in the kitchen while his brother stormed out of the room, said his goodbyes and left, slamming the door behind him.
One down, two more to go, Roper thought.
ROPER GLANCED AROUND,
studying the female members of his family who gazed at him with curious eyes. Ben’s abrupt departure had left them stunned, Roper was sure.
“Obviously Ben’s upset about something. What’s going on?” Sabrina asked. She sat beside Kevin, holding his hand. At least she seemed genuinely happy.
And that, Roper thought, was what this part of his day was all about. He needed to use his sister’s happiness as the springboard to give him the courage to lay down the law with his mother—and undoubtedly hurt her in the process.
Before he could speak, a noise sounded from outside the door and suddenly Harrison entered, key card in hand. Roper raised an eyebrow but didn’t say a word. He already knew there was more to this relationship than his mother wanted to admit to her children
or
to herself.
“You shouldn’t just barge in as if you own the place,” Cassandra chided him.
He raised an eyebrow. “Considering I gave up my own room, you can’t expect me to knock first. Hello, everyone,” Harrison said.
Roper shook the other man’s hand.
Sabrina managed a wave. From her pale face, she hadn’t known about their mother’s living arrangements, either. It seemed as if Cassandra was keeping up the pretense of not wanting to be with Harrison for no one’s benefit that Roper could figure, except maybe her own.
Cassandra scowled at him. “John was just about to say why he called us all together. It’s a family meeting so you might want to—”
“Stay,” Roper added before his mother could send the other man away. “And do not argue with me, Mom.”
Harrison grinned. “Thank you,” he said to Roper.
“No problem.”
Cassandra needed the older man more than she wanted to admit and Roper was glad she had him, especially since he, himself, intended to take back his own life. He was grateful and relieved he wouldn’t be leaving his mother alone to her own devices.
Cassandra folded her arms across her chest. “I wasn’t going to argue. If Harrison wants to pretend he’s part of this family, who am I to stop him?” She sniffed in her haughty way.
Harrison laughed and slung an arm around her shoulder. “Go on,”
he said to Roper.
“Please,” Sabrina said.
Roper drew a deep breath. “Okay. Here goes. For as long as I can remember, I’ve been here when you all needed me. Twenty-four/seven, at your beck and call.”
“Well, I’m not sure I’d phrase it so callously,” his mother said, only to be silenced by Harrison squeezing her shoulder in warning.
“You’ve been a wonderful son,” she said, her voice sincere.
“Thank you.” He wasn’t fishing for compliments, just stating reality.
“The thing is, that by doing everything you all wanted when you all wanted it, I’ve neglected my own life.”
“I can see that,” Sabrina said softly. “I have for a while. It’s just that old habits are hard to break.”
He smiled at his little sister. “Tell me about it.”
“So what are you trying to say?” Sabrina asked.
“That it’s time for you all to live your own lives.”
“As if we haven’t?” Cassandra asked.
The sad thing was that Roper knew she believed her words, which made what he had to say all the more difficult. “No, you haven’t. If I was in a meeting and one of you called, I dropped everything. If I was on a date and you needed me, I cut it short. Don’t get me wrong, I did it because I wanted to—”
“And you don’t anymore?” his mother asked, insulted.
He wanted to say no that, of course he wanted to, he just couldn’t do it anymore. But that would be a lie and he’d promised himself and Amy—even if she wasn’t aware of the promise—that he’d be completely honest. For everyone’s sake, including his mother.
“No, Mom, I don’t want to. I want to concentrate on my career. The time I spent at the lodge showed me the difference less stress could make on both my body and my mind.”
“This is all that woman’s fault.”
“That’s not fair, Mom,” Sabrina objected. “And it’s not true. Besides, I thought you liked Amy. You said she’s bright enough to hold her own with John, and she didn’t bore you like the other bimbos he’s dated.”
Sabrina shot him an
I’m sorry
look. “No insult intended,” she said.
“None taken. And I’m glad you like Amy. Because if I have my way, she’s going to be around for a long, long time.”
Sabrina let out a whoop and ran to Roper, giving him a hug. “I hope you find the happiness we have,” she said, nodding toward Kevin.
His mother remained silent. Sulking.
And Roper wasn’t even finished yet.
“Thanks,” he said to his sister. “We’ll see. There’s a lot to work out between us.” An understatement if he ever heard one. “Still, I want to be clear on what this means to all of you.”
“Do tell,” Cassandra said, curled up in the corner of the couch, sulking like a petulant child.
He realized now what a complete disservice he’d done his mother by being at her beck and call. He’d never allowed her the chance to stand on her own. He hoped she did so now and didn’t just transfer her needs from Roper to Harrison.
“I love you, Mom, and I will always be here for you if you need me.
I want to see you. I want to have lunch or dinner with you and I want you to call me when you want to talk.”
“But?” she asked.
“But you can no longer expect me to drop everything I’m doing to fix things for you. You’re a grown woman with a new career and you’re going to love it.”
Harrison applauded.
Roper rolled his eyes. “You’re also able to support yourself now, and I’m hoping you’ll love the freedom it gives you. Don’t close your eyes to new opportunities. Accept and embrace who you are and what you can do today, not twenty years ago,” he said, hoping she heard the love and respect in his tone. “America is going to adore you on this series.
It’s going to open up all sorts of new doors for you. So don’t be stubborn like you were with Harrison. I’m betting you’re going to love what happens to you next and I want to be there to share it.”
“On your terms.”
Okay, so she didn’t
get it
yet. He had faith that she would.
“On
our
terms, over time,” he said.
“I need to lie down.”
Harrison shook his head, but Roper met the other man’s gaze and silently told him he’d expected this reaction. There would be more discussion, and hopefully, understanding, in the future.
Harrison escorted Cassandra out of the room.
Roper turned to his sister and her fiancé. “As for you, Sabrina, you’re marrying a good man.”
Kevin cleared his throat. “Thank you,” he said, clearly embarrassed.
Roper inclined his head. “Sabrina, you have the world ahead of you.
If you continue to work as a paralegal, good for you. If you decide not to work, that’s between you and your husband. Whatever you two decide, I stand behind you. I’ll be there for you, but I won’t undermine Kevin by sneaking money to you or providing things he can’t. Unless he agrees,” Roper said, grinning because Kevin was nodding at everything he said.
Sabrina seemed surprised but okay with his words. Relieved, even.
“One last thing. About the wedding.” This was the best part of his day, Roper thought, reaching into his pocket.
And damned if he didn’t deserve some fun after the nightmare he’d been through.
“Your wedding should be everything
you
both want. I want to give you the wedding of your dreams.” And he already knew that Sabrina’s dreams weren’t his mother’s. “So here,” he said, walking over and handing them the check. “Plan your wedding the way you want. Or don’t plan the wedding and use this toward your future. The choice is yours.”
Sabrina glanced down at the paper in her hand and her eyes widened. She squealed and threw her arms around Roper’s neck. “You are the best, John. The very best.”
“Do it your way, baby sister,” he whispered in her ear. “And be happy.”
Kevin shook Roper’s hand. “I can’t thank you enough.”
Roper shrugged. “If Mom had the money, she’d do it herself and you’d be ducking dove shit. So this is my pleasure,” he said, laughing.
Kevin smiled. “She’s going to have a fit when she realizes you’ve effectively taken away her power.”
“I’m hoping that by giving it to Sabrina, she’ll include Mom on the right things, shut her down when she doesn’t belong, and eventually we’ll all be one big happy dysfunctional family,” Roper said.
“We can hope,” Kevin said.
“Will that family include Amy?” Sabrina asked.
Roper groaned. “I honestly don’t know.”
But he couldn’t wait to find out.
AMY KEPT BUSY. AT WORK SHE’D
been given new clients and she’d also shadowed both Annabelle and Sophie through various events and meetings, learning by example. Her uncle Spencer was pleased with her progress at the Hot Zone and he took her to dinner to tell her so. She joined a gym and went there at night so she didn’t have to spend so much time in an empty apartment. There she met other single women in a yoga class, one of whom she’d become friendly with. All and all, her life was exactly what she’d wanted when she’d planned to come to New York.
Unfortunately the life she’d imagined hadn’t included John Roper.
Having been with him, she was afraid she’d never be the same without him. And working at the Hot Zone, where she read the papers and blogs to keep up with damage control, guaranteed she was reminded of him daily. Buckley hadn’t let up on him, but the rest of the papers had, due in the most part to the fact that he’d been at the gym every day.
But Amy was reminded of him nightly when she lay in her bed, tossing and turning. How could she not when their last encounter had included his declaration of love.
One she hadn’t been able to verbally reciprocate even though she knew without a doubt, she felt it deep in her heart. How could she not love a man who was so kind and generous, thoughtful and caring? Not just to his family but to her, as well. He’d made her wish for a day in the snow come true in a way that went beyond special. He could have just taken her outside. Instead he’d planned a fantasy afternoon.
But that was the problem. No matter what they both felt in here, she thought, her hand rising to her chest, it had been a moment out of time. Real life meant obligations he couldn’t extricate himself from and cameras that followed him everywhere he went.
That was a life of his choosing. Not hers.
Frustrated with her train of thought, she tossed her pen down onto her desk. Obviously she couldn’t concentrate on work. A glance at her watch told her it was late in the afternoon. She’d had it for today. With nothing pressing keeping her at the office, she decided to head home.
She began packing her bag, taking select things to review with her when she heard a knock at her door. “Come in,” she called, hoping nobody had an assignment that would keep her in the office later. She was more exhausted than she’d realized.
She glanced up at the same time her visitor strode inside. “Roper,”
she said, surprised to see him. Her stomach flipped, nerves fluttering inside her.
“Hey, there,” he said casually. As if nothing important had happened the last time they’d met.