How Long Will I Cry?
Copyright © Miles Harvey
All rights reserved. No part of this
publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any
electronic or mechanical means,
or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior
written
permission of the publisher, except
to review.
Published by
Big Shoulders Books
DePaul University
Smashwords Edition
Chicago, Illinois
First Edition
ISBN: 978-1-62890-155-9
Library of Congress
Control Number 2013949113
Cover photo by Carlos Javier Ortiz
www.carlosjortiz.com
Big Shoulders Books logo design
by Robert Soltys
Table of Contents
M
y Life Was Only Worth A Few Guns
W
hy Should I Harass People For Standing On The
Corner?
God, Are You Trying To Get My
Attention?
E
verything About Me Is Tainted
T
he Dream Club’s Chief Dreamer
W
here In This Community Does It Say We
Care?
H
ow Do You Learn to Live Again?
VOICES OF
YOUTH VIOLENCE
Miles Harvey
Editor
Chris Green and Jonathan Messinger
Associate Editors
Lisa Applegate and Molly Pim
Managing Editors
Bethany Brownholtz,
Rachel Hauben Combs and
Stephanie Gladney Queen
Associate Managing Editors
Becky Maughan
Copy Editor
Published by Big Shoulders Books
DePaul University
About Big Shoulders Books
Big Shoulders Books aims to produce one book
each year that engages intimately with the Chicago community and,
in the process, gives graduate students in DePaul University’s
Master of Arts in Writing and Publishing program hands-on,
practical experience in book publishing. The goal of Big Shoulders
Books is to disseminate, free of charge, quality anthologies of
writing by and about Chicagoans whose voices might not otherwise be
shared. Each year, Big Shoulders Books hopes to make small but
meaningful contributions to discussions of injustice and inequality
in Chicago, as well as to celebrate the tremendous resilience and
creativity found in all areas of the city.
The views and opinions expressed in this book
do not necessarily reflect those of DePaul University or the
College of Liberal Arts and Social Sciences, and should not be
considered an endorsement by DePaul for any purpose.
About This Book
THIS BOOK IS FREE. The editors ask that by
taking a copy, you agree to support groups working on anti-
violence efforts in Chicago. Please donate money—or your time—to
one of the organizations listed at the end of this volume. When
you’re done, pass the book along to someone else (for free, of
course), so that he or she can give. It adds up
About Our Funders
This book was made possible by
grants from the Vincentian
Endowment Fund at DePaul and the William and Irene Beck Foundation.
Additional support came from
Steppenwolf Theatre Company and Now Is The Time, a citywide
call
to action against youth violence. Funding for Now Is The Time
was
provided by the Hive Chicago Learning Network, through the Smart
Chicago Collaborative, a joint project of The Chicago Community
Trust, the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation and the
City of Chicago.
The Richard H. Driehaus Foundation provided
funding for educational
programming connected to this book.
Additional financial, logistical and/
or administrative support was
provided by the following organizations at DePaul University:
Irwin W. Steans Center for
Community-based Service Learning
Egan Urban Center
Beck Research Initiative
Women’s and Gender Studies
Program
Office of Institutional Diversity
and Equity
Department of English
College of Liberal Arts and
Social Sciences
The following DePaul University
students participated in this project:
Emily Ce Anderson
Lindsey Anderson
Mickie Anderson
Leah Andrews
Ruben Anzures Oyorzabal
Lisa Applegate
Steve Barclay
Zachary Baron
Nicole Bartoloni
Meredith Boe
Ashley Bowcott
Ashley Braun
Bethany Brownholtz
Nathan Brue
Kevin Cahalin
Borja Cabada Anon
Matthew Caracciolo
Mariah Chitouras
Adam Cohen
Rachel Hauben Combs
Teresa Cronin
David Cueman
Emma CushmanWood
Mollie Diedrich
Anna Dron
Jerae Duffin
Lynneese Duckwiley
Rose Gregory
Mellissa Gyimah
Shawn Haynes
Bridget Herman
Bethanie Hestermann
Timothy Hillegonds
Maria Hlohowskyj
Rachel House
Stefanie Jackson-Haskin
Tannura Jackson
Megan Jurinek
Olivia Karim
Haileselassie Keleta
Bryan Kett
Danielle Killgore
Marc Leider
Christopher Lites
Brittany Markowski
Genna Mickey
Adrienne Moss
Ashley Mouldon
LaDawn Norwood
Michael O’Malley
Miriam Ofstein
Sara Patek
Molly Pim
Robin Posavetz
Stephanie Gladney Queen
Sydney Riebe
Ariel Ryan
Jacob Sabolo
Genevieve Salazar
Tyler Sandquist
Amy Sawyer
Samantha Schamrowski
Jason Schapiro
Kristin Scheffers
Monica Schroeder
Michael Shapiro
Barbara Sieczka
Erika Simpson
Kendall Steinle
Annelise Stiles
Ann Szekely
Molly Tranberg
Jaida Triblet
Danielle Turney
Michael Van Kerckhove
Sarah Vroman
James Walsh
Colleen Wick
Alexis Wigodsky
Nora Williamson
Kaitlyn Willison
For those who died and those who are still
bleeding.
Introduction
By Miles Harvey
This book began with a brutal murder, a viral
video and a cup of coffee.
The murder took place on Sept. 24, 2009, in
the Roseland neighborhood on Chicago’s Far South Side. On that
Thursday afternoon, a fight broke out between two groups of
students from the nearby public high school, Christian Fenger
Academy High School. There had been a shooting outside the school
earlier in the day, and now tensions exploded into a wild melee
near a local community center. Acting “out of impulse,” as one of
the participants later put it, about 50 young people swarmed toward
each other, a few of them wielding huge pieces of lumber as
weapons.
Somebody slammed one of those boards into the
skull of a 16-year-old named Derrion Albert; somebody else punched
the honor student in the face; somebody else swung another board
down on him like an ax; somebody else stomped on his head and left
him to die; somebody else shot a video, laughing while he filmed.
And when that video went viral on the Internet, it caused a
national uproar. U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan described
the killing as “terrifying, heartbreaking and tragic,” while
Attorney General Eric Holder, who traveled to Chicago with Duncan
shortly after the incident to call for a “sustained national
conversation” on youth violence, claimed the murder had left an
“indelible mark” on the American psyche.