How to Date a Dragon (22 page)

Bliss groaned inwardly while keeping a pleasant smile plastered on her face. She knew exactly what the attention grabber was talking about. Judith wanted her to elaborate on the near disasters—not the work she’d done creating her Hall-Snark cards.

As she’d been coached, Bliss said, “It’s wonderful to see you too, Judith. Come in. I’d like you to meet my family.”
Yeah, right. I’d like to hide them in the bushes in the backyard.

She led the woman into her mother’s kitchen where Malinda stirred an empty pot on the stove. Her brothers were sitting at the kitchen table along with her father, who’d apparently decided to leave his man-cave in the basement and make an appearance.

The three men rose and waited to be introduced, almost as if they’d developed manners in the last three minutes. Malinda wiped her perfectly clean hands on her apron and joined the family ticking time-bomb.

“Judith Applebottom, these are my parents, Malinda and Romeo Russo, and my brothers, Ricky and Emilio.”

The host stuck out her hand and shook those of each family member. “Yes. I can see the resemblance,” she said.

Oh, puuulease. We all have dark brown hair and brown eyes. That’s about it. But to their credit, at least none of them look like deer in the headlights or psychotic killers.

“Please have a seat,” Malinda said. “We’re just waiting for one more family member, and then we can eat.”

Oh. My. God. She couldn’t possibly be referring to Drake as family already, could she?

The director yelled, “Cut.”

“What’s the matter?” Malinda said, anxiously. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, that was fine. I’d just like to get everyone together in the living room to talk. The kitchen is a little crowded already and if another relative arrives…”

“He’s not a relative.” Bliss glared at her mother.

She looked sheepish. “Not yet.”

“Oh, God, Ma. Do
not
blow this out of proportion!”

Bliss’s father blustered, “Malinda, what the hell are you talking about?”

“Bliss’s boyfriend, of course.”

Ricky’s and Emilio’s eyes lit up. Ricky laughed evilly. “The squirt’s got a boyfriend? Oh, I can’t wait…”

“So help me, God, if any of you…” Bliss trailed off when she noticed a camera aimed at her with the red light on.

***

Everyone was seated in the living room. Bliss fidgeted in the middle of the old-fashioned blue velvet sofa with her parents on either side. Brothers Emilio and Ricky slid the armchairs from beside the fireplace to a spot on each end of the sofa for easy camera viewing.

The host looked for a place to sit until Malinda said, “Ricky. Get up and give our guest your chair. You can take the ottoman.”

“Oh, Ma…”

She silenced him with a severe look.

“Sheesh.” Ricky got up and made a sweeping gesture toward the chair. “Please have a seat, Miss…”

“You can just call me Judith.” She smiled and took the vacated chair. “Is everyone ready?”

“As ready as we’ll ever be,” Bliss muttered.

“Great.”

The director told the cameramen to resume filming. The host had just commented on the delicious dinner, which of course they hadn’t eaten yet. Anticipating her mother’s reaction, Bliss took her hand and gave it a slight squeeze. She’d set up the signal ahead of time. It meant, “shut the hell up,” but naturally she didn’t explain it that way to her mother. “Let me do the talking” is what Bliss had told her it meant.

“So, tell me what Bliss was like growing up, Mr. Russo.”

He laughed. Before he could tell the truth, his wife interjected, “Bliss was a perfect child.”

She was probably going to continue her “sweet and selfless” speech, but her father and two brothers roared with laughter.

The host grinned. “I take it that means she wasn’t so perfect after all?”

The three men grinned at each other, as if daring each other to go first.

Finally, Ricky said, “She was a little pest. She wanted to do whatever we were doing, and we couldn’t get rid of her no matter how hard we tried.”

Emilio chimed in, “Remember the time we put her in the rowboat with no oars and shoved her out to sea?”

Mrs. Russo looked horror stricken. “When did you do that? Why didn’t I know about it?”

“Because you’d have tanned our hides, Ma,” Ricky said.

Judith seemed delighted with the anecdote. “I take it Bliss didn’t tattle on the two of you?”

“Of course not,” Emilio said.

“Well, that’s quite something, isn’t it?”

Ricky laughed again. “Not really. If she’d said anything to our parents, we’d have made her life a living hell.”

“Hmmm.” Judith turned to Bliss. “So what
did
you do?”

Bliss rolled her eyes. “I dog-paddled my way to shore, then jumped on Emilio and pummeled the life out of him while Ricky laughed his ass off.”

Judith raised her eyebrows. “It sounds as if you learned to take care of yourself at an early age.”

“Oh, yeah. Having two older brothers was all kinds of fun, but at least they prepared me for whatever the rest of the world could throw my way.”

“That explains why you were so cool, calm, and collected throughout the show.”

Bliss snorted.
In
comparison
to
the
drama
queens.
“Probably. It also explains why my cards are so snarky.”

Judith chuckled. “I imagine verbally is one way a youngest child could fight back. But your sister started the business. And I believe you said she moved to India. Is she in India right now?”

“Yes. I wish she could be here. She deserves a lot of the credit.”

“But you had no help at all in the past few weeks… in fact, I understand there was a major complication that hindered your progress.”

Bliss took a deep breath.
Here
it
comes.
“Yes. One night I was sound asleep in my apartment when the fire alarm went off.”

The host let out a little gasp and looked properly shocked. “The fire alarm?”

As
if
she
doesn’t know this story backward and forward by now.
“Yes,” Bliss continued. “The building was on fire and I had to get out. My computer melted in the fire, so I had to buy a new one and recreate all my designs.”

“My goodness!” Judith exclaimed. “How frightening.”

At that moment the doorbell rang. Malinda jumped up. “Oh, let me get that. It’s probably Drake. Bliss, stay right where you are.” Dodging cords and lighting, Mrs. Russo rushed to the front door.

“Cut,” the director yelled. “Mrs. Russo. Wait until the cameras are ready before you open the door.”

She jammed her hands on her hips. “I will not make our guest stand on the stoop and wait while you rearrange your precious cameras.”

If only Bliss could reach across the room and squeeze her mother’s hand—or her throat.

Malinda threw open the door and exclaimed, “Drake! I’m so glad you could make it.”

Fortunately or not, the cameraman managed to get the shot.

“Hello, Mrs. Russo. Nice to see you again.”

She grabbed his hand. “Come in. I can’t wait to introduce you to everyone.”

Not realizing what chaos he was walking into, Drake seemed relaxed and let Mrs. Russo pull him across the room.

“Sit right here next to Bliss.”

“Oh, I don’t want to be on camera. I’ll just wait until you’re all finished.”

The host jumped up and said, “Please. It will help Bliss tremendously if we tell the
whole
story.” She winked. “And I hear you’re a big part of that story.”

It’ll help the show tremendously. They couldn’t care less if it helps me or not.

Drake smiled at Bliss. “Okay, then. If it’ll help Bliss, I’ll do my best.” He settled in next to her and took her hand. Malinda perched on the arm of the sofa next to Drake. She patted his shoulder and said, “This is the fireman who saved our daughter’s life.” She sniffed and dabbed at fake tears. “When I think about what could have happened…”

“Hold that thought,” the director interjected. He checked to see that the cameras were ready and said, “Roll ’em.”

Judith jumped up, strode over to Drake, and shook his hand. “We have a real, live hero in our midst! It’s an honor to meet you, sir. Bliss, do you want to tell us who this special guy is?”

“Sure. This is my boyfriend, Drake. He’s the firefighter who saved my life.”

“Really? How incredible! Did you know each other before the fire?”

“No. We met in the middle of the smoke. I couldn’t see to find my way out, so he picked me up and carried me to safety.”

The host slapped a hand over her heart. “How romantic.”

Bliss couldn’t imagine the embarrassment Drake must be feeling, but to his credit he didn’t blush. She hoped no one commented on his strange red and yellow streaks, but just in case, she shot her brothers a pointed glare.

Instead her father piped up and said, “You’ve got some punk rock hairdo there, son.”

“Romeo! Don’t be rude. This is the man who saved Blissy’s life!”

Oh, shit. I forgot Dad didn’t see him when he came to help me move… and Mom used my nickname.
Bliss pinched the bridge of her nose.

Drake just laughed. “It’s weird, I know.”

Mr. Russo humphed but thankfully let it drop.

The hostess returned to her seat and begged Drake to tell his side of the story.

“You don’t have to do that.” Bliss implored him with her eyes. She hoped he wouldn’t tell them about going in after her computer and getting suspended for it.

“It was just another job,” he said, and shrugged. Then he looked directly into Bliss’s eyes. “Until I met this beautiful lady.”

“Awww… Tell us about that,” Judith urged.

“Oh, don’t make him go through it all again,” Bliss said.

The director yelled, “Cut.”

Judith’s eyes narrowed. “Why not? Do you have something to hide?”

“Of course not! I just don’t want Drake to feel like he’s being cross-examined.”

“It’s okay, Bliss. I mean, there’s not much to tell. It was a typical job.” He winked at her and she breathed a sigh. He seemed to know she didn’t want him to tell the world what an idiot she had been over her stupid computer—especially when it was too late to save it.

“Okay, then. Maybe we’ll talk more about that later. Right now I’ll get back to how it impacted Bliss in the competition.”

Whew.

The director called for the cameras to roll again, and the host acted as if she hadn’t missed a beat. “So, you saw her through the smoke and knew she was in trouble. Tell us about that.”

Drake draped an arm around Bliss’s shoulder. “We help anyone we come across in a fire. We have protective gear, so we—”

The host rolled her eyes and the director yelled, “Cut.”

Judith looked at Drake as if he were an errant child. “People don’t want to hear about what you do for everyone. They want to know about Bliss… and the romance. Can’t you elaborate on how she felt in your arms or something?”

“Uh… I guess so.”

Bliss jumped up. “Look. My family and friends aren’t used to being directed for TV. How about if you cut them a break. Let them say whatever the hell they want. If you don’t like it, you can edit it later.”

Judith and the director exchanged stares. Finally Bo nodded. “That’s fine. We want them to seem as natural as possible.”

“Good.” Bliss sat down again.

Malinda wrung her hands. “We should probably eat dinner soon. I turned off the oven, but the chicken could dry out if it’s left too long.”

Judith waved away the comment. “Oh, I won’t really be eating with you. I’m on a very strict diet and it doesn’t include Italian food. We’ll just smear some sauce on a plate and make it look like I did.”

Malinda rose and crossed her arms. “Are you saying my dinner isn’t good enough for you?”

Uh-oh. Them’s fightin’ words!

“Ma, I’m sure she doesn’t mean it that way.”

“Then why should we waste my excellent gravy on a plate if she doesn’t want to eat it?”

Judith rose and looked as if she was going to stroll over to Malinda but thought better of it. “Mrs. Russo, this is TV. I can’t take the chance of smearing my lipstick or having a spot of red sauce on my chin.”

Ricky spoke up. “Ma, nothing on reality TV is real. Didn’t you know that?”

Malinda huffed. “No, I did
not
know that. Why would I? If it’s not real, why do they call it reality TV?”

“You know what?” Judith said to Bo. “I think we should just finish up the interview with Bliss and her boyfriend. Then we can be on our way.”

Malinda lifted her nose in the air. “I think that’s a good idea. Everyone else… let’s eat.”

The cameramen, hostess, and director followed the couple into the backyard, which gently sloped down to a private dock. They strolled toward some deck furniture casually grouped together on the grass.

As soon as they were all seated, Judith said, “So, where are your designs? I’m excited to see them.”

“They’re still on my computer.” Bliss knew what was coming. This was the part where the host would pretend to be shocked by the news of the second fire.

Judith halted and faced Bliss head-on. “Still on your computer! But your entire line is due soon. Don’t you have any finished that you can show us?”

Drake squeezed Bliss’s hand, giving her some much-needed empathy.

“I know you expected to see some finished products, but I don’t have any.”

“Well? Why are you so behind?”

“I had nearly all of them redone a couple weeks after the fire. I even saved the designs on a disk and locked it in a safe-deposit box—that time.”

“Okay…”

Judith had said to drag it out for dramatic effect, but Bliss really didn’t feel like reliving the past few weeks in gory detail. Still… when had she ever had a choice when it came to this damn show?

She took a deep breath and continued. “Well, as you know, I had to relocate, so I moved to an apartment over a bar where my friend worked. She gave me a job there so I could pay the rent without dipping into the money you gave me to create the line.”

Judith raised her perfect eyebrows. “You were working as a cocktail waitress the whole time you had to recreate your designs?”

Bliss had to give herself a mental warning not to roll her eyes. “Yes. But it was okay. I was back on track until Friday night. I had printed out all the initial samples and made sure they were ready for the professional company I use to make a beautiful finished product. Even so, it would have had to be a rush job, but before I could get over to their shop in the North End…”

Judith pressed a hand over her heart as if she were so nervous she might have a coronary. “What happened? Tell us.”

“The bar burned down, and with it, my apartment, the CD, and all my samples. I was lucky to get out alive with my computer.”

Judith gasped. “Another fire? You were burned out of not one, but
two
apartments in the last few weeks?”

“Yes, but at least this time I managed to save my computer. It had all my designs on it, and since the bank burned…”

“What? The bank where you had the safe-deposit box burned too? What the…” Judith looked as if she was about to lose it, then she quickly pulled herself back from the non-scripted edge. She chuckled. “Thank goodness you had everything in two places. They used to say, if you could only grab one thing on your way out of a fire to take your photo albums. Now, everyone’s photos are on their computers along with a host of other things.”

“Yeah.” Bliss didn’t quite know what to say to that, so she just waited for Judith to talk again.

“So, it sounds like Boston has had more than its share of fires recently.”

“Yes,” Drake interjected. “It’s not usually like this.”

Psychotic, jealous dragon in town and everything…

“And were you there to save your girlfriend’s life again?”

The cameras both focused in on Drake.

He chuckled. “I was there, but Bliss saved herself that time. I was helping other people.”

“Oh my. You must have been worried about her…” Judith prompted. “I’ll bet you wanted to leave those people to the other firefighters and run right to Bliss. Didn’t you?”

“Well, of course I was worried about her and called out to her as soon as I was inside—but leaving people in trouble isn’t what we do. I was cut off from my fellow firefighters when the ceiling caved in.”

Judith sucked in another deep breath. “The ceiling caved in? And you knew Bliss was living on the second floor of that very building?”

She’s just loving this.

“Yeah. And there was a family on the third floor too. They all got out together. Until I saw my girl and knew she’d made it out okay, I was a little frantic.” He squeezed Bliss’s hand and they smiled at each other.

Yup, that’s the bit they were looking for.

“I can’t imagine what that must be like. To put yourself in harm’s way for people you don’t even know… the whole time realizing your own loved one could be in peril…”

Judith leaned back in her chair as if stunned. Meanwhile, something big and dark swooped over them.

“Cut,” the director yelled. “Where the hell did that shadow come from?”

Drake scanned the sky and muttered, “Oh, crap. It couldn’t be…”

A horrible feeling of dread made the hairs on Bliss’s arms stand up.
No
way… Zina?
Had she found them somehow? What kind of exposure would she risk to cause trouble?

Drake rose from his chair and excused himself. He jogged toward the front of the house, despite the protests of Judith and the director.

“How can he just get up and leave?” Judith shouted. “How are we going to make a sensible segue out of a sudden exit like that?”

The director shrugged. “Say he got called to a fire. Maybe we can get him to film the call as soon as he gets back.”

“Nice save,” Judith said. “What an exciting moment that would make.”

Bliss jumped to her feet. “There won’t be any more filming. We all need to get inside and lock the doors.”

“What the hell are you talking about, Bliss?” Judith demanded.

“Roll ’em,” the director called as he fled.

“Trust me… and run!” She grabbed Judith’s arm and dashed to the house with the cameramen on her heels, capturing every second.

As soon as they were inside and the dead bolt was locked, Judith exclaimed, “This is insane!”

“No,” said Ricky’s voice from the living room. “What’s insane is Bliss’s boyfriend running down the street yelling, ‘Taxi!’”

“This isn’t the city,” Mr. Russo said. “We don’t have taxis trolling the streets looking for a fare.”

Oh, no.
Bliss led the others into the living room to see her brothers peering out the side window, while her parents parted the lace curtains and stared out the little window on the front door.

“What did you do to scare him off, Bliss?” her mother asked tearfully.

How
am
I
going
to
explain
this
one?

Emilio chuckled. “She probably mentioned the
M
word… marriage.”

***

Vulcan gauged the right moment to appear without being detected by humans. He snapped his fingers, and his white robe turned into a business suit. Drake had just rounded the corner out of sight of the Russo residence and halted, letting out a huge sigh of relief when he spotted him.

“Thank
God
, you heard me.”

Vulcan chuckled.
If
you
only
knew
how
true
your
words
are.
“Yes. I assume you’ve located the delinquent paranormal?”

“She just swooped over the area. I don’t know precisely where she is at this moment.”

Vulcan sniffed the air. A faint sour scent tinged the fresh ocean breeze.

“You can smell her?”

“No. I’ve never been close enough to catch her scent. What I’m detecting is smoke.”

Drake’s eyes widened in shock. “No… not again! I should have picked up the familiar smell. Are you sure?”

“There.” Vulcan pointed back toward Pleasant Street. A gray spiral rose into the air.

“Shit.” Drake dashed back toward the Russo home while Vulcan tried to keep up. He wasn’t used to running since he could transport himself just about anywhere with a thought.

The house didn’t seem to be burning, but smoke was billowing from a short distance behind it.

“Around the back,” Drake shouted.

Sure enough. The dock was on fire.
If
no
one’s watching, I can put that out with one wave of my hand.

But at that very moment, several people rushed out the back door. Even a camera crew!

“Stay back,” Drake yelled. “I’ve got this.”

Two young men stood with their hands in their pockets, looking on and wisecracking. “I thought he ran off. Now he’s back?”

“Bliss has that effect on some people,” her father said.

Mrs. Russo elbowed her husband in the ribs. “And you wonder why she never brings her friends home.”

A metal bucket sat on the dock, enveloped in flames. Drake dashed into the blaze and grabbed the handle. The heat of the aluminum would have burned a human hand, but a dragon’s skin was so thick, it wouldn’t even make a mark.

Drake leaped over the flames to the part of the dock closest to shore. He filled the bucket and tossed the water where fire met dry wood.

Bliss appeared in the doorway, waving frantically to catch Vulcan’s attention. He started toward her, but then she pointed to the shed in the next yard. Apparently she’d spotted Zina.

Bliss started dashing toward the neighbor’s shed at a flat run.

Vulcan sprinted across the lawn and tried to catch up with her.

As he rounded the shed, he saw the female dragon zipping up her leather jacket. Her surprised gaze snapped to Bliss’s face, but before she could do or say anything, Bliss opened the shed door, shoved Zina inside, and leaned against it.

“Can you zap her out of here quick? Maybe to outer space?”

Vulcan chuckled. “I know just what to do with her.”

He transported himself inside the shed, grabbed Zina before she could get away again, and in a flash they arrived on the top floor of the office building that housed the Council. Zina gazed at the glass-bubble dome, openmouthed but silent.

His god cronies looked up from their poker game, but where was Gaia?

“Is she here?”

He didn’t have to tell the other gods who he meant. Apollo pointed to the forest in the corner. “She’s been in there all day… chanting.”

“Chanting?”
That’s new.
“Should I disturb her?”

“At your own peril.”

Zina ripped her arm out of Vulcan’s grasp. “Where the hell are we? And how did we get here? Who are you anyway?”

“I’m out.” Apollo tossed his cards into the middle of the table, rose, and strolled over to them. “Is this the dragon she’s after?”

“And who are you, pretty boy?” Zina gave the sun god a grin that was probably supposed to be alluring. Instead it made her look like the predator she was.

“This is she,” Vulcan answered. “Zina.”

“I think Gaia would want to know. I’ll get her.” Apollo strode off to the forest and spoke softly. He made a reverent apology for disturbing her and stepped away.

A few moments later, a bleary-eyed Mother Nature emerged. “Who dares disturb me when I’m deep in meditation?”

Vulcan appeared before her quickly so she wouldn’t blame Apollo. “That would be me. Meditation? I’ve never known you to meditate before.” He immediately wondered if he should have said that out loud.

“I understand it might make me a little calmer. Believe me, I could use some serenity.”

Oh, I believe you.

She glanced over at Zina and frowned. “Is that who I think it is?”

“Yes, Gaia. Zina is the dragon who’s been setting fires to your beloved city.”

“And risking exposure of her kind… not that I’m fond of dragons, but the human population really can’t handle the knowledge that they exist—or ever existed. We’ve finally managed to convince them that the whole race was a myth. She almost single-handedly undid all that work.”

“Yes, Gaia.”

She reached out and touched his arm. “You did well, Vulcan. Now, leave her to me.”

“Can I watch?” he asked impulsively.

Mother Nature paused, and he wondered if she was going to tell him to mind his own business, but to his surprise, she simply nodded. The two of them approached Zina together.

The usually cocky dragon took a few steps backward as they came closer.

“Not so confident now, are you?” Gaia said.

“Only because I don’t know who you are.” Then she puffed herself up. “Not that it matters. There’s nothing you can do to me.”

A sinister smile spread slowly across Gaia’s lips. “Oh, no?”

“Nope. I’m immortal.”

Mother Nature grinned. “I know. Which makes my punishment for you even richer.”

“Punishment? Who are you to punish me? I don’t see a judge or jury anywhere.”

Chuckling, Gaia strolled around her. “I’m neither judge nor jury… I am your mother—the mother of all, and you’ve been very naughty.”

“Mother of all?” Suddenly Zina’s eyes grew wide. “Me remember now. Mother Nature?”

“The one and only.”

“Oh shit.”

“Indeed.”

Zina looked all around her, probably hoping for an escape route. She saw the bank of elevators and began to inch toward them.

“It’s too late,” Gaia said. “I’ve already done most of what I plan to do to you.”

“Most of… what are you talking about?” Zina asked.

Vulcan couldn’t help echoing the question in his head too.

Mother Nature held herself regally as she pronounced, “Zina, you have abused your gift of flight. You can no longer fly. You have abused your power of fire. You can no longer breathe fire.”

Zina opened her mouth and huffed. Nothing came out. Not so much as a smoke curl.

Gaia strolled around her. “And now I need to know why. Did all of this stem from trying to make someone love you and create the gift of life inside you?”

“It started that way, but my cycle ended three days ago. Thanks to that harlot, I won’t get another chance for five years.”

Mother Nature’s brows rose. “Excuse me? Did you say your cycle ended three days ago?”

“Yes. What of it?”

“Isn’t that when you set fire to the bar in which she and several other people worked? The building that was previously home to five people?”

Zina held her head high. “I was upset. I don’t like being rejected.”

“Nobody likes to be rejected… just like it’s not nice to fool Mother Nature. Believe me, I understand. But do I burn down every company that makes butter taste good with half the calories? Or smite every sixty-year-old who tries Botox? Hmmm… do I?