Authors: Jennifer Foor
The blood was rushing to my head, but when I felt him slide inside of me, I forgot all about being uncomfortable. I grabbed the wall as he pushed his length all the way inside of me. In my mind, I pictured it going in and out of me and the sensations were already building up.
"God, I love fucking you. Tell me you like it." He kept up his pace as he waited for me to reply.
I felt his hand reach up my shirt and grab at my breast right before I attempted to answer him. "I love it. I love how you make me feel."
"Oh yeah, baby, I know you do."
Sure, he was cocky, but it's what made me so hot for him. I loved when he talked dirty and wanted quickies at random times of the day. It made my heart beat fast and my mind fill with satisfaction. This handsome man that was grinding his hard erection deep inside of me was as crazy about me as I was him. He kept going faster until I felt him grab my hips and turn me around against the wall. "I need to look at you."
"Take me to the bed and do whatever you want with me." He picked me up and carried me over to the bed, where he laid me down and climbed over top of me. I felt him penetrating me again and it was at that moment where my release came. It overwhelmed me, sending me into a euphoric moment that I didn't want to come down from. His kisses covered my neck as he grinded his body into mine. I moved my hips to match his rhythm and when he started going faster, I knew he was about to release. Jammer buried his head into my neck and sucked hard on my skin as he jerked just a few more times before letting his body collapse over mine.
The extra weight of him was shifted off of me as he rolled me over top of him. He kissed the base of my head. "I really love you."
I giggled. "I really love you too."
He placed little kisses on and around my lips. "No, you don't get it. For the first time in my life, I know what I want. Finding you was the best fucking thing to happen to me. I just want you to be happy too. What if you lose this place, Charlie? Hypothetically, if being without me could save the tavern, what would you choose?"
I wondered if this was some kind of emotional conversation that sometimes happened after intercourse. "Why would you even ask me that?"
"Never mind, it doesn't even matter."
I wanted to know what he meant, but I looked over at the clock and realized it was after ten at night. "Oh my God, I slept that long?"
He smiled and pulled me closer to him. "We were slow, so I just closed up early. I figured you could use the night off."
"What would I do without you?"
"I guess you'd be sex deprived and overworked." His sarcasm was on overdrive.
"Seriously, you don't know how much I appreciate you, Jammer. Without you, I would be so lost."
It was true. We were such a great team. If I ever lost him, I don't know what I would do.
"Why don't you go back to sleep. I'm going to go watch some television and check on the kid."
He kissed me and headed out into the living room. As funny as he was trying to be, I couldn't help but get the feeling that there was something bothering him; something that he didn't want me to know.
Chapter 30
Jammer
When Charlie never came downstairs to switch with me, I knew she must have been sleeping or dealing with Ryan, so I just worked the rest of the night myself. We weren't busy anyway, so it wasn't that big of a deal. Granted, my desperate attempt to be with Charlie was out of guilt I was feeling about being able to save her from losing the tavern. At first, I wanted to tell her, but out of my own selfishness I just couldn't deal with the thought of giving her up. I guess in many circumstances people sacrificed what they loved for their loved one’s happiness every day. Still, every single time I looked at Charlie, I knew it was the only way out of this situation.
As painful as it was, I focused on a plan and knew what I was going to do. I would have to suck up the pain and pretend that it wasn't bothering me. Every single touch, every single kiss, kept making me fall more in love with her.
Leaving Charlie was going to rip out my heart.
While she slept, I started writing her a note. I tossed the first twenty in the trash bin, before finally taking a few deep breaths and regaining my composure. Just writing down the words goodbye seemed impossible. I contemplated asking her to wait for me until my father kicked the bucket, but it was seemingly obvious that he would probably outlive the both of us for spite.
It was inevitable that my time with Charlie was limited. I wanted to savor every single second, but at the same time, it made it harder to walk away.
With her brother being sick, I had made a few calls and begged Shaun to take on more hours when I left. Telling him was like sealing the deal of my leaving, since he and I didn't always see eye to eye. I knew he would be dying to spill the secret to Charlie, before I was able to actually leave.
I guess my decision was made the second that I knew I had no other choice. Seeing that billiard commercial gave me the idea. Since I watched billiards on television while I worked, they always listed the upcoming events. I knew when it was held every year, but since I had been living the lifestyle I was living, it was easy to just not acknowledge it. Still, when I heard how much the
winner would receive, it changed everything. I knew my father would not settle until Charlie lost everything. No matter how I tried to play it out in my head, she was always the one to suffer. The plan I had concocted in my head would initially be painful, but Charlie would come out with her tavern, and if I won, she would get to have a future with me, if she still wanted it.
Yes, it was painful and nerve wracking, and when I thought about losing her, it would be difficult to see through. I'd meant to do it when I closed up for the night, but I couldn't say goodbye without touching her and holding her again. For the first time in my adult life, I wanted to cry. In such a short time, Charlie had become everything to me. The actual chances of me winning a billiards competition were so slim, but it was a risk I would have to take.
Since I'd only come with a small amount of things, it was easy to pack up without her noticing. If I left something it would just be a reminder to her, so I really did try to collect all of my belongings.
My letter was meant to be short, but the more I tried to write goodbye, the more difficult it became to find the words to create the closure that I needed her to have.
Since Charlie didn’t know about my father’s ultimatum, she would believe that me leaving was for real and that I had changed my mind about being in a committed relationship. I needed her to believe it, because my father was no fool. He would make sure that me leaving wasn't a ploy to beat him at his own game. I had to make sure that everyone, including Charlie, really believed I left her.
After having sex and doing a couple things around the house, I kept her close to my body. When she finally fell asleep was when I let my emotions really get to me. She was warm against my skin but I felt cold knowing this could be the last time I ever held her. If I didn't come up with that fifty grand our relationship couldn't be. Sure, we could move away, but my father would stop at nothing to keep us apart. He was an arrogant man that had to be in control. If I could have changed my name, I would have, just to get away from him. Hell, I'd even considered faking our own deaths to escape his controlling demeanor. As cool
as that played out in my mind, it wasn't exactly possible without some kind of illegal connections.
I got up early the next morning and brewed Charlie's coffee for her. I'd carried Ryan to his room in the middle of the night, right before heading back to bed, so I leaned against the counter and quietly tried to think of reasons why I shouldn't be going through with my plan.
Charlie was the most important thing in my life. It was no longer about pool, or who I was going to hustle for the win. It was about giving her everything I possibly could, which included her family's business. I sat the letter next to the coffee pot and looked into the bedroom where she still lay asleep. She looked so peaceful and happy. This was the day where she would feel the most pain. By tomorrow she would hate me and hopefully in time she would have the strength to move on. Of course, I wanted to believe I could win that money, but it was farfetched and more of a dream that I couldn't get her excited about.
As I exited the building, I looked back at the door I had walked through so many times before. It was by far the hardest thing I had ever had to do. I wasn't just going to miss Charlie; I
was going to miss Ryan. I wanted to teach him about pool, just like his dad had taught me. I wanted him to know that I'd always be there if he needed to have a guy talk. I wanted him to know that I would do anything for his sister and that even when he grew up and went out on his own, she would always be taken care of.
But...I couldn't tell him, because I knew it just wasn't possible.
I could have sworn that Joker or maybe even her mother was giving me signs to turn back around and just stay. The door wouldn't lock when I went to leave. It took me ten minutes to get it to work. When I got to my car, I couldn't get my key out of the door and then my car wouldn't start.
I loved Charlie, I knew that, but I didn't realize what loving her would feel like when I walked away. My first inclination was to drive to my father’s place of business and beat him to death. I filled my heart with rage to avoid feeling the guilt and pain. My chest felt tight the farther I got from the tavern. I beat my hands against the steering wheel, finally allowing myself to see what a mistake I'd made. There was no way in hell that I was going to win that tournament. Signing up was going to cost me everything.
Sadly, I continued to drive away from Charlie and our life together, until I reached the lawyers office. They were more than surprised to see me walking through the door like they hadn't been searching for me for months. In a matter of fifteen minutes, I was signing over my share of ownership to Charlie and Ryan.
When I walked out of there, I knew exactly where I was going next. My father needed to know that I'd left her. The sooner the better.
I wanted that bastard to know exactly what he was taking away from me and that he was dead to me. I never wanted to see him again and I would not even attend his funeral when his sorry ass died. He didn't deserve to be a parent to any child.
When I looked down to check my phone, I knew that Ryan would be awake, which meant Charlie had read my letter. I had no calls on my cellphone, but it was because I asked her to never try to call me again.
I pulled over and parked the car in front of my father's office. As I climbed out; I cracked my knuckles and prepared for what I was willing to do. I'm glad I never owned a gun, because if I did, I would be in jail by nightfall. He had taken away my future,
my heart and all hopes of ever finding happiness. I wanted him to pay.
I found him in the back office talking to someone who was sitting with their back turned to me. When he saw me barge in, he stood up. "Marcus, I'd like you to meet my son."
I looked at the man, who turned around and noticed he was one of the goons that had tried to break into the tavern when I had first got back into town. "Are you fucking kidding me?" I looked at my father and waited for him to respond. When he cocked his eyebrow, but said nothing, I took it upon myself to reiterate. "This mother fucker tried to break into the tavern." I pointed to the dickhead. "You have two seconds to get the fuck out of my face before I pummel you into the concrete wall."
He turned to look at my father and shook his head as he walked out of the office door.
"Son, what is this visit about? I think you need to learn business etiquette." He crossed his arms.
"I wouldn't ever want to learn jack shit from you. I came to tell you that I signed over my quarter ownership and walked away
from Charlie. I hope your fucking happy for ruining my life. I'm out of here!"
I went to leave, but heard him talking and froze. I didn't turn around to face him though. "One day you will thank me."
"I wouldn't thank you if you saved me from being hit by a fucking train." I turned around and looked right at him. "I despise you. You don't even know what love is, you common bastard. I hate you so much!"
"You think your mother is so innocent. For all I know, you could be Joe's son. How would it make you feel to have fucked your own sister?"
A knot dropped in the pit of my stomach and I felt like I was going to vomit. It had to be a lie. She couldn't be my sister. There was no way. "You lie!"
"Before you accuse me of being so horrible, I think you need to ask your mother for the truth. I caught them together. Don't tell me that I don't know. Why do think you feel so connected to her? Think about it, son."
Did he just call me son after saying he wasn't my father?
I walked up closer to him. "You're not worth the breath." I spit right in my father's face and walked out of the building. Feeling sickened over his confession about Charlie and I being related. I needed to visit with my mother, before I left town.