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into silence around her.

Finally she lifted her streaked face to stare around her dazedly. The large blue robe still smelled

like him. He was etched into every part of the bedroom, and the sheets were tangled from their

lovemaking that morning. She looked at the pillows that still bore the impression of their heads,

hers so close to his as they kissed and whispered of all the things they looked forward to doing

together.

She thought she was numb but she wasn't, Something was tearing inside her. Staying there

without him was unbearable.

She lurched to her feet, gathered up her clothes and dressed. Such a pretty dress that she'd bought

just for last night. You should wear red more often, he said. She knew she would never wear It

again.

Maybe she had overreacted. Maybe she had panicked and gone too far. She'd pushed him too

hard. She'd demanded things he wasn't prepared to give. He'd been thinking of the professors'

families, and she had only made it worse. She had to explain things to him. They couldn't just

end. How could she live without him when he had her soul? Half of him was better than nothing.

If she had nothing, she was dead.

She ran downstairs, looked up the information number for the airport and dialled. When the

airport switchboard answered, she was put on hold. As she waited, her feverish urgency trickled

away.

He left. He left her because he wanted to leave her. He didn't say, we'll talk soon. He didn't say, I

love you and I will think about what you said. All she had asked was for him not to leave her like

that, and he did.

"Hello, may I help you?"

She jumped; 'she'd forgotten she was on hold. ' I'm sorry," she whispered. "I've made a mistake."

She hung up, then dialled again. It was time to go home.

She asked her grandfather to come pick her up, and he promised to be there in fifteen minutes.

Then she left the diamond ring on the counter, turned off the coffeemaker and washed the carafe.

She was waiting on the front porch step when her grandfather arrived.

Wallis stepped out of the station wagon, took one look at her lifeless face and blank eyes, and

folded her into his arms. "What happened, kiddo?" he asked gently.

Her face screwed up. Suddenly she was sobbing against his chest, while he patted her back

helplessly and told her a great many things, none of which she remembered. He bustled her into

the car and they drove away.

Halfway home, she swiped her eyes and said, "I'm better now."

He nodded, scowling at the road. "I know you are."

"This isn't going to matter a year from now, is it?" she sniffed.

He shook his head, mouth compressed. "Nope."

Tears continued to sneak down her face. She caught them before they slid too far down her

cheeks, peeking sideways at him. "Why-a year from now, I'll say, "What an interesting w-w-

week I had'," she wobbled. "Don't you figure?"

"I figure." They pulled to a stop, and he glared up at the stoplight, jaw working. He covered her

hand with one of his. "You want to talk about it, pumpkin?"

She stroked his gnarled knuckles lovingly. And what would she say? Grampa, I might be

pregnant. Grampa, I can't live without him, For all his ferocious bluster, he really was just a frail

old man. She couldn't do that to him. "There's nothing to talk about," she said quietly. "We

thought we were suited, and we aren't. I think-I think we both just wanted it so badly, you

know?"

"And don't you want it anymore?"

The pain welled up again in her throat, burning hot. She forced it back and said, "I do. But I don't

think he does."

He squeezed her hand hard. Then the light changed and the station wagon started to move again.

Wallis cleared his throat and said, "I think you should call in sick and not go to work tonight."

She sighed and started the pretence of putting it behind her. Sooner or later she would find that

she had stopped acting and it was true. People did that. They survived love affairs, broken

marriages, and got on with their lives; She just had to figure out how to do that. "No, I can't do

that. I just called in sick last week. Besides, it'll be better to have something to do."

Soon she would have all the time in the world on her hands, to think about all the things she

wanted to do. Now it seemed to stretch endlessly in front of her-She winced away from the

thought. She'd find a way to deal with that when it came. Maybe-maybe she was pregnant. A

ferocious 'hunger gripped her. She was appalled at how much she wanted it.

Then a really sneaky part of her whispered, maybe he would want to know if you're pregnant.

Maybe he would want to see the baby sometimes. You could talk together on the phone. He

might come and visit.

She banged her head back on the headrest in frustration.

Stop it, you're pathetic, shut up!

Wallis stared at her in alarm.

"Nothing," she mumbled. "I’m better now."

They arrived home, and she went up to her room to change out of the red dress into shorts and a

T-shirt; and to wash her face. She took the outfit back downstairs and stuffed it into the trash.

Janice was busy cooking lunch, and watched her with raised eyebrows.

"Don't ask," she gritted.

"I wasn't saying anything," the housekeeper said quickly.

Tim discovered she was home and came to buzz around her. She dealt with him somehow. Words

happened, and he seemed satisfied with them. Eventually he buzzed away.

Then it was time for work. She dressed comfortably in light blue cotton trousers and blouse and

left. More words happened as the nurses on duty greeted her cheerfully. Victor happened, with

gilded malice, until she snarled quietly at him and he suddenly decided to keep well away from

her.

It was a relief for once to sink into other People's problems. She was able to switch herself off, to

become someone else for a time, someone who was calm and concerned and capable. Someone

who knew how to fix the problems she faced.

The night passed and then it was time to go home.

Life was so much easier on a schedule. She collected her purse, went outside into the bright

early-morning sunshine, and sagged.

She blinked around in confusion. She couldn't remember where she'd parked. It was such a pretty

day and all those damn birds were singing, and she had never felt so bereft and woebegone in all

her life.

There was her car, parked right beside a black Jeep Cherokee.

That's a coincidence, she said to herself. Somebody's got a Jeep that looks just like Chance's. Any

number of people have Jeep Cherokees.

Her feet seemed to be glued to the pavement, however. She stared down at them, distressed.

She seemed to be positioned so that she could see the Jeep out of one corner of her eye. As she

watched her feet, the driver's door opened and somebody got out, unfolding a long, powerful,

heartbreakingly familiar body.

Her head jerked up. Chance straightened, running both hands through his hair. The sunlight

glinted off burnished gold. He was dressed in jeans, a black T-shirt and running shoes. From that

distance he appeared to be frowning, the hard, chiselled angles of his face stark.

Incredulity, pain, gladness all surged up inside her. And no little fear. She started to shake as he

strolled toward her. Why is he here? She thought. What more can he say after all the painful

things we said to each other—more accusations? I'm so tired. I’m not ready for this.

She looked over her shoulder at the hospital. She looked at her car. She looked at Chance as he

came to stand in front of her. There were dark shadows under his glimmering eyes.

“What a busy night I had," she said stupidly. Her heart was hammering away like a jackrabbit

running for its life.

He hesitated and, for the first time since she'd known him, appeared to be at a loss. Then, gently,

he said, "You must be tired. Can I drive you home?"

The gentleness hit her harder than anything else would have. She closed her eyes tight, feeling

the hot tears prick again, and just shook her head.

"Mary, please," he whispered. "I have so many things to say to you."

Her voice quavered badly. "I don't want to fight again."

"I love you. 1 don't want to fight again, either," he said huskily. "I'm sorry, precious."

That did it. She broke, sobbed aloud, and ran toward him blindly. Strong, hard arms snatched at

her; he hauled her against him, and she burrowed hungrily into his chest. He shuddered, gripping

her tightly, bowing his head and shoulders around her.

"I love you," she wailed. Words tumbled out of her in a mad, uncontrolled rush. "I love you-I-I'm

sorry for everything-I'm sorry I hung up on the airport, but you just left, you see-I thought you n-

n-never wanted to talk to me again and th-th-the operator said hello-and I really couldn't th-th-

think of anything to say to that-"

He exhaled sharply, face in her hair. "Mary. Sweetheart. You don't have anything to be sorry

about. I shouldn't have walked out like that. You just-you just scared the hell out of me."

She couldn't get close enough. She wanted to crawl inside his skin and live there. Her tears

soaked into his T-shirt as she whispered, "I'll do, anything. I'll learn how to be your wife, and-and

I won't ask any questions, and I'll be right there waiting for you when you get back. I promise-I

promise."

He groaned, compulsively passing an unsteady hand over her hair. "Hush now. Mary, stop

promising me things. I'm not going anywhere. I quit."

She lifted her streaked face. "What?"

He cupped her chin. The icy stranger was gone. His face was stripped of barriers, vivid with

passion and need. "I said I quit. I had time to cool down during the drive to the airport, and I

thought about the things you said. Everything you said was true, precious. When I got that phone

call yesterday, I stopped being me-the man I was coming to know and like, the man I wanted to

be."

She went light-headed from relief and a fierce burst of joy, but she put it aside, for the pain was

back in his voice. She stroked his cheek, murmuring, "It's all right. You don't have to explain. I

understand, Chance. You were dedicated for so many years-you couldn't just set it aside."

"No, I need to say this, Mary," he said, rubbing his cheek against hers. He continued in a low

voice, "That car ride to the airport was the longest journey I've ever taken. When I got there, I

seemed to be seeing everything through your eyes. I couldn't understand what I was doing there.

I couldn't remember why it mattered so much: All I could think about was how you looked when

I left and how shattered I felt when you said you were having second thoughts about having a

baby."

She wrapped her arms around his neck, cradling his head. "It wasn't fair to put so much pressure

on you. You had so much on your mind. I knew that afterward."

"But you were right. I even got to thinking about your being pregnant and how I'd feel if I were

half a world away. I couldn't handle it if you were having the baby without me. I need to be

there, to be both a partner and a father. I can't be dedicated to both you and the job, not in the

ways that I need to be."

He sighed and nuzzled her neck. "I just can't leave you alone. Not in any way since the first time

I saw you. There wasn't any other real choice. I turned around and came home."

She tilted her head back, closing her eyes against the brightness of the sun, while the feel of his

mouth against her skin made her fingers curl with pleasure. She said dreamily, "You stole my

soul the first time you kissed me. I thought you had lots of pickle jars."

He pulled back and stared at her. "What?" She explained, and he started to laugh. Rocking her

gently, he crooned, "What a lot of courage it took for you to even agree to see me at all.”

"Yes," she said seriously, "I was brave. I don't think you know how terrifying you can be,

Chance."

He smoothed her .hair back, framing her face with his hands, eyes dancing. "I don't think you

know how terrifying you can be."

Her eyes went very wide and her mouth dropped open. "Me?"

"Yes, you." He chuckled. "You look so surprised,. From the first time you told me to get out of

the way, I was hooked. I kept coming back. You were such a puzzle, I couldn't figure you out.

There was no telling what was going to make you squeak and run, or what might make you reach

out to me with open arms. I decided I had to kiss this delightful little enigma I had taken home

just to see what it would do, and then I found us both going up in flames. God, you shook me."

She smiled. "Were we doomed?"

"I think so." His gaze dropped to her lips, and he grew serious. He bent and covered her mouth

so reverently, she whimpered and held on to him tightly. He drew back and whispered, "You're

the best teacher I've ever had."

"I know you're mine," she said softly, glowing up at him. "Think of everything we've got to learn

together."

Her red-rimmed eyes were luminous. A light breeze lifted wavy strands of her hair and blew

them around her face like dandelion fluff..She was so unaware of the gentle power she had, but

her transparent joy tugged at him constantly, like the moon's command over the ocean. His entire

world was encapsulated in that small, emphatic package. He would spend his life protecting and