I Promise (18 page)

Jordan savored each spasm of pleasure that poured from his weakened body. “I love you.”

A
lex fell across her bed, exhausted. Thoughts of a nice bubble bath floated through her mind, but her body lacked the strength to pry her from the mattress.

As she stared up at the ceiling, she thought of Malcolm. She reviewed the scene with them on the balcony for the thousandth time. She analyzed his every movement and tried to ponder the meaning behind his every word.

Had she made the right decision? After all, hadn't she waited two years to hear that he loved her? She shook her head.

Christian was right. Malcolm didn't know what the word
love
meant. How could he be in love with Christian one week and in love with her the next? She made the right decision, she confirmed. It was past time that she got over him and his philandering ways.

After what had happened tonight, she could use a comforting shoulder. The apartment's unusual silence struck a sad chord. She missed Christian.

Why hadn't she given Malcolm a chance? Rolling to her side, Alex pushed up and went into the kitchen. Instead of reaching for the ice cream, she settled for a glass of wine. She needed something to calm her fragile nerves.

Minutes later, she sat in the living room with the stereo turned down low, a glass of white zinfandel, and a bowl of strawberries. She focused on her flight the next day and how she was going to handle her fear of flying.

A faint knock at the door drew her from her troubled reverie. Still dressed in her formal gown, she went and answered it.

Malcolm stood outside her door. Dressed in his tux, but with his tie undone and his hands jammed in his pockets, he lifted his troubled gaze to her.

Alex's stomach clutched in reaction to her unexpected visitor.

“Can I come in?”

Her emotions warred as she met his bold gaze. “What are you doing here?”

A soft smile caressed his lips. “I thought that was obvious. I came here to see you.”

When she failed to move, he pulled his large frame erect and crossed his arms. “We can talk out here if you don't mind everyone in the building hearing what I have to say.”

She hesitated for a moment longer, then finally relented and stepped back from the door.

As he entered the apartment, the masculine cologne flirted with her senses. She closed the door behind him.

When she turned, Malcolm's mouth captured hers as his arms tightened around her like steel bands. She moaned as her resolve melted beneath his body heat. As he withdrew his lips, she had trouble lifting her heavy eyelids and trusting the strength of her own legs.

“You mean the world to me,” he said. His breath caressed her face, like a warm summer breeze.

Her eyes fluttered open, while her breath huffed out in small puffs. “This is madness,” she sputtered. She placed a hand against his chest in a weak attempt to push away. She stopped when she felt his heartbeat pound beneath her fingers.

Malcolm tilted up her chin. “I keep telling myself the same thing.”

Alex pushed away, needing some space between them in order to collect her thoughts. Malcolm followed her as she moved back into the living room.

She grabbed her wine from the coffee table and downed half its contents.

Malcolm touched her shoulder. Pleasure quivered through her. “I can't let us end,” he whispered, then placed a kiss against the back of her neck.

Alex closed her eyes, waiting for the feeling of unreality to vanish.

His lips moved to her left shoulder, burning a trail of kisses that had every fiber of her being quivering. His hands slid around her waist.

She turned to face him. “I think you'd better leave.”

Malcolm shook his head. “Not until we talk.”

“I've told you. We have nothing to talk about.”

He moved closer. “I need you.”

She laughed. “I'm sure you won't have any trouble finding someone else to seduce tonight. That is why you came, isn't it?”

He lifted his chin.

She shook her head. “I think you need to play this game with someone who doesn't know you as well as I do.” She strode across the room and reopened the front door. When she looked back at him, she held her fragile emotions in check. “I want you to leave.”

“I love you,” he said. His gaze bore into her.

She shook her head, refusing to believe him.

His long strides closed the distance between them. “Don't do this,” he pleaded.

Tears spilled from her eyes.

“Damn it, Alex.” He backed her against the wall and closed the door shut with the heel of his foot. “I love you.”

A sob lodged in her throat as she continued to shake her head.

Malcolm lowered his head and whispered, “I love you.”

Alex's confession tore from her lips, “I love you, too.” She cupped his face in the palms of her hands.

He pulled her body against him. His mouth covered hers.

She returned his kiss, opening her mouth wider to the pleasure of his tongue.

Unfamiliar feelings tore through him, and were too strong to hold back.

She locked her arms around him, willing him to take all of her.

Malcolm clung to her as if she were his life preserver in his sea of trouble.

Sweet. She tasted so sweet. He deepened the kiss. Passion like he'd never known gripped him.

She met each thrust of his tongue with vigor. Her head spun from the pleasure he gave her.

Fumbling with the zipper of her dress, he sought more from the woman who claimed to love him. He needed more. He dragged his lips from her mouth to the lobe of her ear.

She moaned. Her dress slid to the floor. Her eyes drifted closed at the feel of his rough hands cupping her breasts bound within the confines of a lace bra.

His lips probed lower, skimming her neckline. With expertise, he removed her bra. His kisses branded every inch of her.

Her sensitive breasts ached with need as he teased her body with his mouth. Her knees weakened when he closed his mouth around her taught nipple.

She couldn't breathe, couldn't think straight.

His tongue played with the tip.

Her nails raked the planes of his back.

Sweet Jesus
. He lifted his head to whisper against her ear. “Is this what you want?” His hands encircled her body to cup her buttocks. “Answer me. Is this what you want?”

Weakly, she nodded.

Her panties slid to the floor.

His mouth covered hers again.

Hungry for anything he could give, desperate to fulfill what her heart desired, Alex tore at his clothes until nothing existed between them.

To her, the thick plush carpet was as soft as any bed, his low, husky moans were as seductive as any music. She reveled in the moment. She had waited, lived for this moment for what seemed like an eternity.

“I want you,” he murmured. “I need you.”

More tears brimmed, then slid from her eyes. Passion infused her soul as she wove her fingers through the wavy curls of his hair. His mouth was magic, his hands sorcery. If this was a dream, she prayed she would never wake.

Her hands sought and found his hardened member. She became drunk with desire from the heat of his skin and the hard ridges of his muscles.

Her eyes feasted on his masculinity. His bare flesh glistened in the flickering candlelight. Desire pooled inside of her.

Malcolm's hands roamed over her smooth skin. Spurred on by deeper need, he parted her legs and pressed his face against the hot moist flesh of her woman's body, ravenous for the taste of her.

Alex dove into a sea of insanity. She arched toward him. With each caress of his tongue, her mind swam and her world tilted.

When Malcolm straightened, chest heaving, Alex drew him to her and kissed him, savoring the taste of her from his lips. She squirmed with pleasure. She shifted for the top position. Her hair tumbled forward across her cheek, shrouding their faces like a black curtain. Their mouths locked, and their tongues dueled as their passion heightened.

Malcolm's hands closed on her hips, lifted her, and pulled her down on his shaft. She gasped in delight as her body welcomed him.

The fullness of him assuaged the craving of her loins. Alex's fingers dug into the muscles of his shoulders. His lips brushed over her neck, paused to caress the hollow of her throat and finally discovered the cleavage of her bosom.

She had never felt so wanton. She pressed hard against his length. She yielded to the throbbing urgency that consumed her. Their entwined bodies thrust together in rhythm.

His lips danced over her mouth, demanding more from her than she thought she could give, and yet she gave more.

Her body arched with ecstasy, evoked by his touch as sparks of rapture shot through every nerve of her body. She trembled, unable to bear the pain of desire a moment longer. His back muscles flexed beneath her hand as he moved within her with the grace of a panther.

Malcolm singed every nerve in her body and she received him. Bliss rose to a crescendo. Alex's short gasps mingled with her sighs as her nails dug deeper into the smoothness of his back.

His hands clasped tighter across her hips. A deep groan of pleasure tore from his lips.

Alex cried out his name as per passion exploded. She fell limp against him, then languor in the afterglow of their lovemaking. Peace, unlike any Alex had ever known mended the shattered pieces of her broken heart.

Malcolm drew her body closer, and closed his eyes. She had become his world, his life and he made a fervent prayer to never lose her.

 

Christian lay in the center of her bed, staring up at the ceiling, listening for night sounds. There weren't any. What had she done? How had she found herself here in this place, lying next to a man she knew fate would snatch away at any moment?

He hadn't meant any of those things he'd said tonight. He couldn't have. Tears burned her eyes. It was too late now. The decision had been made and in a few hours, when the sun rose, she would have to face the truth. People often murmured words of love in the heat of passion. And by morning, Jordan would realize his mistake and leave her.

He'd told her that he loved her. She should have felt something, right? Happy. Relieved. Excited. Instead, she was numb.

She didn't know what would be expected of her by morning, or what to expect from him.

Don't get your hopes up
. She sighed, then turned against her pillow to gaze out of the window. As she lay there, listening to his steady breathing, she wondered what he was dreaming.

Her heart weighed heavy in her chest as sleep continued to elude her. Bobby had told her to follow her heart, but had her heart steered her down the wrong path?

Too tense to be still, she slipped from the bed and slid on her jeans and a flannel shirt. Barefoot, she tiptoed across the room and slipped out the door. She moved through the hallway, concentrating on being quiet. Once outside, she followed the thin sliver of the moon all the way to the gazebo.

Her brows lifted with surprise to see their romantic dinner had been cleaned and cleared away. She crossed her arms and inhaled the night's cool, crisp scent. Christian had hoped to clear her mind of all the doubt and insecurities that plagued her. She'd learned the trick after her parents' death, and it had always seemed to work, until now.

Her thoughts chased one another inside her head. Tears slipped over her lashes and rolled down her cheeks. Questions and recriminations swirled faster inside her head. All her life she had known what she wanted, and that was to get married and live her life on the McKinley Ranch. When she had been diagnosed with breast cancer, then lost one breast, she'd accepted the harsh reality of living her life alone. What man would want her in this condition?

She wrapped her arms around herself to ward off the night's cool air. She gazed around as far as her eyes could see. She absorbed the beauty of the ranch. She sat there for a long time. Not thinking. Not deciding. Just sitting and absorbing the stillness.

This was home, the only home she knew. If she closed her eyes, she could picture her mother. Christian surprised herself with the clarity of her memory. Her heart squeezed and she gave in to the temptation and closed them.

Her mother's bright smile flashed from the past. Her mother had always had a way with making others feel special when she smiled.

Her eyes were rich, dark eyes that saw clear to your soul. She shoved her memories away, succeeding in shutting out all but the lingering heartache.

Christian opened her eyes as a sensation of being watched crept over her. She turned and blinked with surprise to see Bobby stepping into the gazebo.

“I knew I saw you sneaking away from the house at this ungodly hour.” Bobby's smile resembled her daughter's.

“I wasn't sneaking,” Christian answered, clasping her hands on her lap.