I See You (10 page)

“He’s a cat. They don’t understand that it’s not polite to shit on folks’ flowers. Besides, you never know, it might do them good. God knows they need all the help they can get. The earth here is really arid and lacks the nutrients they need to thrive.”

Trish is gawping at him like he just told her his dick size broke all Guinness world records. Her eyes are wide and the way her chest is heaving is making me blush. “You’re a keen gardener?” I ask, trying to divert his attention away from my shameless friend.

He smiles at me and it’s so very real. One thing I’ve come to learn over the past years is how fake some people really are. They can say one thing but their facial expressions, especially their smiles, say something entirely different. But Devon’s smile is radiant, and directed at me as though it is just for me. “Very. That’s one of the things that attracted me to the house; its land. Although I wish I would have thought to do a soil test first.”

I grimace and cast an eye over my own plot of land. “As you can tell, I’m awful with plants. I don’t seem to be able to not kill them!”

He laughs, the deep timbre making Tricia sigh dreamily. I roll my eyes and smile awkwardly at Devon when he blinks curiously at my friend.

“I could help you if you want,” he offers. “We can start with hardy plants. It’s very therapeutic, spending time in the garden. Nature’s gifts can be stimulating and very soothing to the soul.”

Tricia’s eyes widen, and from the look on her face I can tell she’s suddenly gone off him. His obvious passion for the environment is cute and I smile warmly at him, glad that my friend seems to have changed her mind quickly. “Thank you. That would be good. God knows I could use the help.”

He smiles widely. I’m shocked by my acceptance of him but my instincts aren’t screaming, and for once I throw caution to the wind and decide to give him a chance. I can learn to trust them, right?

“Well, that’s if we can keep Steve away for long enough.” He winks then drains his glass of wine. “Well, thank you, ladies.” He hands the glass back to Tricia then nods his head and leaves us alone again.

“I definitely don’t know him. He seems . . . nice,” Tricia remarks.

“Nice is good.” I scowl at her.

“Nice is boring,” she retorts with a pout. “We girls need someone with a bit of excitement in them.”

“Trish! Just because he likes plants doesn’t mean he isn’t exciting.”

She chuckles and shakes her head. “You have a lot to learn, Nee. You should start by taking off your sleep suit when the sun is glorious.”

“It’s an all in one pantsuit not a sleep suit.” I scrunch my nose up at her.

“It’s practically a habit.”

“A habit?”

She rolls her eyes and takes a big swig from the fresh glass of wine she’s just poured. “It’s what nuns wear, and no man wants to get under those drapes.”

I roll my eyes, ignoring her comment. She’s the type of girl who always needs a man in her life, or rather, a man’s penis. She isn’t bothered about another relationship; she had never been into her last relationship until he cheated with the neighbor.

Shrugging, she settles her gaze back on Devon as he continues with his gardening. “I’d still do him though.”

I nod to myself and snort. Of course.

I sigh in irritation and roll over again, desperate to find a cool spot on the bed sheet. It’s too warm, the night temperature much the same as the day’s now that summer is in full swing. Kicking the duvet to the floor, I huff like a child.

Tricia is giggling in the bedroom next to mine. I can tell she’s on the phone to someone; the thin walls notifying me that she’s flirting shamelessly with a guy who she has on speakerphone, my ears unable to hear anything else apart from their dirty conversation.

When I hear a gruff groan, I shiver; the knot forever present in my gut tightens and coils. I climb from my bed. I do not want to hear them having internet sex or phone sex, or whatever the hell she’s into now. How she can think about anything other than the house cooking us alive is beyond me. Because of my attack, anything sexual makes my stomach turn, so I press play on my iPod and turn the volume to low, just enough to disguise Tricia and co.

Pulling the thin drapes back, I push the window open further, trying to tempt a little more air into the stifling heat of my room.

My gaze goes straight to my neighbor’s house. I can’t help it; his main bedroom faces mine, the small gap between the houses doing nothing for the privacy between each house. And he is in his bedroom. He has the ceiling light on, illuminating the space. I know because of this, and my lack of lighting, he can’t see me watching him. I’m being a creeper but I can’t not watch him. It’s like gravity is pulling my eyes to him, forcing me to see. He’s laid on his bed, his back leaning against a large wooden headboard. He’s wearing shorts, his torso naked as his concentration is directed at an open laptop perched on the bed beside him.

I study him for a moment, my curiosity making me feel strange, awakening slight desire mixed with pure inquisitiveness. After a year of being alone, his sudden presence feels peculiar but if I was honest with myself his presence was oddly welcome. I’m so used to being the only one out here in the hills. My nearest town and neighbor are at least two miles away. So now I have company, I can’t figure out how I honestly feel about it but for now I’m not running or scared of this new company.

I still instantly and my heart rate increases when his hand moves to his shorts and he starts to rub himself over the top of the tight blue cotton, his erection clearly exposed when the outline of his cock is stroked by his own hand.

“Shit,” I whisper to myself, my head turning to make sure I’m still alone and Tricia hasn’t suddenly appeared.

When his fingers push down the waistband of his shorts, I know I should look away, pull the drapes and leave him to it, but oddly, I can’t. My throat starts to close in, my mouth drying when his cock springs free from the confines of his underwear.

“Oh, crap!”

Yet, still I can’t remove my eyes from his pleasuring, his caress mesmerizing as he curls his fingers around the thick shaft and his hand begins to glide up and down smoothly. My breath hitches as fluid suddenly coats my mouth. My lower belly throbs and I hate the way it feels when my nipples harden, pushing against the thin material of my tank and stimulating them further.

What the hell is happening to me?

I
WATCH HER TOSSING AND
turning in bed. Her beauty, even in the dark confines of her bedroom is hypnotic. Her every move is displayed to me via my laptop. I’d been lucky the other night when she’d run to the store, giving me a quick chance to slip in and plant a couple of cameras. One in her bedroom and the other in her kitchen. The new wireless cameras that connect to my laptop via GPS were heaven sent, the fact that they didn’t need installing a godsend when it had taken me mere minutes to set them up rather than the usual few hours that wired ones do.

I missed her more than I ever knew I could miss anyone. I’m so tethered to her that when that was cut, it was like choking on my own sin. I lived in two worlds; mine and Noah’s, and mine and Nina’s. I’d hoped to keep them apart, asked for him to let me keep her, but Noah doesn’t possess empathy. He doesn’t know love or compassion, and my own is more a weakness to him than it is to me.

“This is the life we were born into, Devon. There is nothing else for us. You can’t have both.”

And he was right. My worlds collided, causing mass destruction. Noah is a snowstorm; cold, isolating, and deadly. And I had to make a choice; I couldn’t be in both worlds so I’ll live in one. Hers.

Seeing her today with her best friend made me feel disjointed. It’s tough learning to be me and stepping out from behind the lens. I’m letting myself have a life but I’m so detached from the world around me, living in it is difficult. I’ve always relied on Noah for everything. He made me who I am, so to be without him is like my shadow tearing free and running off to live its own story. I keep myself to myself, quickly learning that I don’t actually like people much. I find most people self-absorbed. The one I only find engaging, because he’s like me in a way, is my friend, Chris. Me, a friend? He was an orphan from the age of fourteen and was raised by an uncle with unorthodox methods of parenting. Chris and I met in a bar and bonded over a barmaid who was trying to seduce us. We took her to a hotel and I fell into old habits, filming her while Chris pushed her sexual limits. It was consensual, but to me it all felt too familiar for comfort. We didn’t share any other nights like that, but a kinship was formed nonetheless. He helped me move here and didn’t ask questions, which makes for the perfect friendship.

I’m drawn back to Nina as she opens the drapes and pushes open the window opposite mine, the moon illuminating her every move. Her perfect tits push out when her chest lifts and she inhales a breath of fresh air. Just as she’s about to move back into the bedroom, she hesitates when she notices me. I swallow, fighting with myself not to look up in her direction and see if I can see her in her physical form instead of the replica image displayed on my laptop screen, although the artificial vision of her still makes my dick hard and my heart constrict.

A wicked thought comes into my head and I have to bite my tongue to stop myself from smiling. Desperation to seek her reaction and to push her into experiencing something natural and beautiful again without disgust and guilt urges me on. Pressing a couple of keys on the laptop, the software brings her image closer so I can catch a more detailed view of her reaction when I slip my hand over my stiff cock. Knowing she’s there, our roles reversed as she watches me from the shadows, makes me almost erupt before touching.

She freezes, her beautiful eyes widening as she takes a look back into her bedroom as if checking she’s still alone. Her perfect body is rigid and tense, her lips parted to accommodate her deep breaths when she realizes what I’m doing.

It feels unusual being spied on. It amuses me and I stifle a chuckle as I slip down the waistband of my shorts and free my throbbing dick. Watching her, watching me is turning me on as much as having my dick buried inside an eager pussy, my fingers simulating the feeling of a dry cunt.

Sex for me is always about the act. Noah teased me for years about being a virgin in high school. When I was fourteen he made one of his many girlfriends suck my dick; the pleasure was incredible and addictive. I only lasted around forty seconds but it was long enough to embed the craving for sexual release, one Noah made sure I fulfilled. Sex was always a selfish act for me until her. All I cared about was my own release, and giving orgasms was to nurture my own ego. Never before Nina had I wanted to experience her pleasure just to live in the grace of her liberation.

Observing Nina’s face closely, I spit on my hand and once again take my cock in its grip. Her jaw opens further, her arousal evident as her nipples peak out from under the thin cotton of her tank. Damn, she’s stunning when she’s turned on. I expect her to quickly shut the drapes and move back after what Noah did to her, but I hope she’s overcome the brutality and learned to separate the difference between sexual release and gratification, and rape, depravity and evil.