Icebreaker (36 page)

Read Icebreaker Online

Authors: Deirdre Martin

Tags: #Women lawyers, #Contemporary, #Legal, #General, #Romance, #Hockey players, #Fiction

Maggie swiped at her nose. “It still might not work.”
“Oh, it’ll work, believe me. That man loves you and Charlie more than life itself. If it makes it more palatable, I’ll tell him it’s a loan—speaking of which, you never talked to him about my original offer, did you?”
“No,” Maggie admitted sheepishly.
“It’s okay. What matters is that I’m here to help right now. And if Brendan says he’s not going to accept it, I will kick his ass from here to kingdom come, so help me God.”
Maggie managed a smile. “Thank you, Neenee.”
Sinead hugged her. “You don’t have to thank me. Ever.”
Maggie took a sip of beer. “God, you never know what’s waiting for you when you get up in the morning, do you?” She sniffled again. “Enough of me and my woes. What’s up with you? I’m sorry I interrupted you at work.”
“I wasn’t at work. I was home stuffing my face with steamed dumplings. Celebrating. I won Adam’s case.”
“Congratulations!” Maggie looked guilty. “You shouldn’t be here covering for me! You should be out celebrating! I’m so sorry.”
“You’re being silly. I actually celebrated at Met Gar earlier today.” She swallowed nervously. “So of course I saw Adam.”
“And—?”
“It felt weird. He was so grateful, and he even kissed me on the cheek. I could tell he was kinda still attracted to me.”
“But.”
“There’s still that roadblock in my head. The ‘I agree with Chip’ issue. I’m so confused.”
Maggie squeezed her knee. “My turn to listen. What is it?”
Sinead groaned. “I don’t want to dump this on you now; you’ve got enough on your plate.”
“No, please, dump. I welcome the distraction.” Maggie took a sip of beer. “Seriously.”
“I had this realization while I was watching Charlie tonight. I know, that sounds crazy—”
“It doesn’t sound crazy at all.”
“We actually bonded,” Sinead said happily. “I made him laugh, and he cuddled with me . . . he didn’t even make a fuss when I put him down.”
Maggie’s gaze was gentle. “And so?”
“I realized that my reaction had to do with Chip. If Adam asked me to stay home with a child, I wouldn’t have reacted so vehemently.”
Maggie’s eyes widened. “Wow. I mean, wow.”
“I know,” said Sinead, digging her knuckles deep into the back of her neck.
“What happens now?”
“Nothing.”
“What do you mean, ‘Nothing’?”
Sinead was torn up with misery. “I just can’t face the thought of rejection. What if I tell him I made a mistake, and he doesn’t want me?”
“That doesn’t seem very likely.”
“When I broke up with him, he told me I was overreacting and that my decision was premature.”
“Maybe it was.”
“I don’t know.” Sinead knew she sounded whiny but couldn’t help it. “I think about the night I broke up with him, and obviously I wasn’t reacting to Adam, I was reacting to what I’d gone through with Chip. I don’t think I even gave Adam a chance to talk.”
“So talk to him now
.
”
“I’m afraid,” Sinead confessed.
“You?”
“Gimme a break. You know I’m bad at this relationship stuff.”
“It’s because you’ve never put relationships first, Nee. That’s not a criticism; it’s just a fact.”
“Well, he’s the same way!”
“Is he?”
“Yes. No. Maybe.” Sinead resumed rubbing her neck. “I think this might be a bad time. The Blades are making a serious run for the Cup. He probably wants to pour all his energy into that now that he doesn’t have to worry about the lawsuit.”
“Oh, so now you know what he thinks and feels? Quite a feat.”
Sinead scowled. “Don’t mock me.”
“Well, don’t be Miss Roadblock.”
“I have to think about this.”
“Stop thinking. Just
do
.”
“I will, I will. In my own time.”
“Well, don’t leave it too long. He’s a good guy; someone else will snap him up.”
“Thanks,” Sinead said sarcastically.
“You’re welcome. Now let’s veg out in front of the TV. I really need to relax.”
34
You jocks are pathetic. The longer you let it go, the slimmer the chances she’ll take you back
.
Anthony’s voice in Adam’s head felt like eagle talons digging into his skull as he sat on his couch, eating milk and cookies. Yeah, yeah, he wasn’t supposed to be eating junk, his body was a temple, blah blah blah. But right now, his brain didn’t care. All he could think about was Sinead.
The Blades won tonight, and it was sweet—until he came to his empty apartment, and his brain began hammering away at him the way it had been for weeks. It’d been saying things he didn’t want to hear but that he knew were true: winning the Cup wasn’t everything. Hockey wasn’t everything. Being a hockey player gave him more satisfaction and joy than he ever could have imagined. But if you stripped it down to its barest bones, the hard truth was that hockey was his career, one that would be coming to an end in the next few years.
Sinead. Shit. He shouldn’t have let her just quit them and run out. But he was shocked. And then he was pissed, too proud to go to her
. Wait till after you win the Cup.
But then he thought: Wait for what? For his life to actually begin? If his playing had suddenly become sharper now that they’d split, that would be one thing. But it hadn’t. He was playing the way he always had; he was also playing with guys, Ty Gallagher included, who’d managed to win the Cup even though they had wives, girlfriends, children. The “eat, sleep, and breathe hockey” mantra was bullshit. Maybe rookies needed to hear it to keep their focus. But he was no rookie. He was a veteran player who was going to be alone the rest of his life unless he put things in proper perspective, and fast.
He drained his glass of milk. Screw the late hour. Screw waking her up. He was going to state his case now. If she thought he was nuts, so be it. It was time to stop living in some imaginary future. If he wanted her, he had to show her.
Now
.
“I’m not sure
I can do that, Mr. Perry.”
Adam stood at the reception desk in the lobby of Sinead’s apartment building, trying to reason with the night doorman. He wanted to surprise Sinead. Rocco (Rocco the Rotund, Sinead called him) didn’t want to let him up to her apartment.
“Rocco, you know me, right? Just let me up.”
“I could lose my job, Mr. Perry.”
“You won’t lose your job,” Adam assured him.
Rocco laughed at him. “Who are you? God? Suppose Sinead is pissed I let you up, and she gets me fired? You gonna pay my bills?”
“Rocco, listen to me. This is a matter of life and death. I’m not shitting you.” Adam paused. “If you let me up, I’ll send you and Mrs. Rocco on a vacation anywhere you want.”
Rocco looked insulted. “Oh, so now you’re bribing me?”
“C’mon, man,” Adam begged. “How about this: I’ll get you tickets to any event at Met Gar you want for the rest of your life.”
Rocco paused. “Anything?”
“Anything
.
”
“For life?”
“For life.”
“Deal.”
Interesting how he didn’t consider that a bribe, Adam mused.
“Can you buzz her now and tell her it’s Oliver?”
Rocco shook his head. “I got a bad feeling about this.”
Adam was getting desperate. “Rocco, you already agreed to this. You want me to go down on my knees, dude?
C’mon
. Time’s a-wasting.”
“If I wake her up, she’s gonna be pissed.”
“I can handle that. Just tell her Oliver’s here.”
“Fine.” Rocco buzzed upstairs. “Sinead? Oliver’s here to see you.” Adam held his breath. “Go on up,” said Rocco. “She’s all yours.”
“Did she sound like you woke her up?”
“I dunno,” Rocco retorted. “Just go and leave me in peace already, okay?”
“Thanks, Rocco.”
35
Oliver? Sinead was
seized by a jolt of terror. Suppose he’d fallen off the wagon? Well, at least he was coming to her, not continuing his binge.
You always expect the worst. Welcome, as Quinn said, to being Irish.
The doorbell rang, and Sinead hustled over to open it. “Oliver, I—”
Not Oliver. Adam. Adam standing there in the hall while she looked like a hag. Adam.
“Hey.”
“Hey?”
Sinead replied sardonically.
Adam looked flustered. “Lame, I know. I just had to see you.”
“How did you get up here?”
“Rocco let me up, and please don’t fire him. I really pressured him.”
Sinead cocked her head inquisitively. “And you said you were Oliver because—?”
“Because I figured you wouldn’t let me up if you knew it was me. Am I right?”
Sinead was silent.
“Can I come in?”
“I guess so.”
Sinead’s pulse was beating madly as she ushered him inside. She’d yet to clear away the cold Chinese food from earlier in the evening
. God, he’ll think I’m a pig, one of those pathetic lonely women who stays in on Friday nights and stuffs her face and watches
Ace of Cakes.
“Please, sit,” Sinead urged. “Unless you’re not going to be here long, in which case you can stand. I guess. Either way, do you want a drink?”
Adam looked concerned. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Why? Of course. Fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Because you seem a little nervous.”
“I’m not.”
Don’t lie
. “Actually, I am. You caught me completely off guard.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t be, it’s okay. Now.” She gestured toward the couch. “Sit. Please.”
“Please stop talking like a robot. You’re freaking me out.”
“I’ll try not to,” Sinead replied, amazed she could manage a smile.
They sat down in unison. Sinead could feel her pulse flutter in her throat; Adam was so close their shoulders practically touched. Perhaps it was because she hadn’t seen him in a while, but he looked especially gorgeous, whereas she did not. She tucked her feet beneath her so he wouldn’t see the chipped toenail polish.
“So—?” Her heart was beginning to pound, and she couldn’t control it.
“I love you,” Adam declared. “I love you, and I want a second chance, if you’ll hear me out.”
Sinead couldn’t breathe for a moment. “Uh . . . okay. I’m listening.”
“The night we broke up? I was a jerk. I listened to you laying out what happened between you and Chip, and never once did it strike me that in every scenario, you were the one making the sacrifices.”
Sinead looked down, twisting her hands in her lap.
“I know I said I agreed with Chip. I know I told you I was traditional. But I’m not inflexible. If you hadn’t run out, we’d have been able to talk about it. But you cut me off at the knees.”
Adam took her hand. Sinead was shocked to see how vulnerable he looked. “All my life, all I’ve cared about is my career, just like you. At least you had a life outside of work. I never did. But now I realize work isn’t everything. I don’t even want to think about all the hours I’ve spent alone in my apartment worrying about strategy and training and inspiration, when I could have been out doing any number of things that have nothing to do with my job. My priorities have been fucked up, and I’ve missed out on a lot. Worst of all, I’ve missed out on you.”
Sinead looked into his eyes. “Look, you’re not the only one at fault here. You were right: I did overreact that night; I did end things prematurely. And like you just pointed out, I didn’t even give you a chance to state your case. I’m so sorry, Adam.”

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