If I Break THE COMPLETE SERIES Bundle (83 page)

“What’s going on?” I ask, exasperated.

“It’s nothing. I thought it was, but it’s nothing. I’m sorry, Chris,” Lauren says as she gets up from the table, but not before she shoots my dad an angry glare. He sighs before sitting at the table. I look over at my mom, who seems as clueless as I am.

“Twilight Zone,” I mutter to myself before leaving the house. When I get outside, I look around and something’s missing.

Where’s my truck?

They were so weird today. Lauren and my dad. And my truck. It was parked down the road instead of behind the house. I remember parking it where I always do. I woke up in a really good mood and that sucked it right out of me, too eerily familiar.

“To be honest, I don’t even feel like going out any more,” I say to Aidan who’s sitting on my bed tossing an old football up and down.

“Well suck it up because we’re going out. I’ve got on my good shirt and I’m ready to get drunk. We’re doing this. Tonight!”

I can’t back out. Lauren’s getting dressed downstairs. I haven’t spoken to her since breakfast, except through text. I still haven’t talked to Jenna but I know she’s in studying and she’s going to be pissed. I still don’t know what her text was about this morning, I’m sure I’ll get an earful about it when I do speak to her.

“Your mood sucks, dude. What happened to the Chris from this morning? You were pumped. Now you’re like a chick that just got dumped,” he says irritated.

“Okay, bad news,” Lisa says, barging into my room.

“What are you? Snookie?” Aidan says, snickering at how high her hair is piled up on her head.

“You can screw yourself,” she says wryly, turning her attention to me.

“I got suspended from Ardeby’s.” She sighs.

“What?” I ask her, not in disbelief but in irritation. This isn’t the first time it’s happened.

“So we can’t go tonight,” she says with a shrug.

“Ugh fuck that. You can’t go, but
we’re
still going!” Aidan bellows.

“I didn’t even feel like going anyway,” I admit.

“Just because we can’t go
there
doesn’t mean we can’t go somewhere else,” she adds cheerfully.

“No, we’re not going anywhere else. We’re going to Ardeby’s,” Aidan interjects.

“You know we haven’t been to the rink in ages. It’d be super fun!” she says enthusiastically, ignoring Aidan.

“They only have stale beer at the rink.” Aidan groans.

“I’m going to need you to attend Alcoholics Anonymous,” Lisa spits at Aidan.

“Maybe we should just postpone this. I haven’t even talked to Jenna today.” I sigh.

“Chris, get the mopey stick out of your butt. This was all your idea. You can stay here if you want but Lauren, Mr. Need a Drink here, and I are going out,” Lisa says, folding her arms.

“Yeah, man, we haven’t even celebrated since I got…”Aidan sentence trails off and there’s a little knock. It’s Lauren, standing in the doorway. She’s wearing a black off-the-shoulder sweater. Her hair isn’t straight like it usually is. Instead, it’s falling down in long waves. I thought she was beautiful the moment I saw her, but this is the first time I thought she was sexy.

“Hey,” she says, pushing her hair behind her ear.

“You look hot!” Lisa says excitedly.

“I think you should stay if you’re tired, Chris,” Aidan says enthusiastically. “I can handle the ladies tonight,” hey says, getting up off my bed. Lauren’s smile drops.

“You’re not going?” She sounds disappointed.

“No, I’m going,” I say quickly.

“I’m sure you are now,” Aidan mutters, and I nudge him.

“It’s just there’s been a change of plans. We’re going to go skating.” Lisa’s excited but Lauren looks pretty skeptical.

“Oh. I’ll go change then,” she says, wrapping her arms around herself like she suddenly feels uncomfortable.

“NO, no you’re fine. I’m not changing” Lisa says, who’s sort of dressed up herself.

“Besides if were’ going to pick up Jenna we need to be heading out now. The rink isn’t going to be open as late as the bar,” Lisa says glancing at her watch.

“Who’s driving?” Lisa asks.

“I vote Lauren. I haven’t been in the Audi!” Aidan says quickly.

“We’re not all going to fit in an Audi,” I remind him.

“Well, I could ride with Lauren and you guys can go pick up Jenna and meet us there,” Lisa says simply.

“I’m not riding with them,” Aidan interjects, and I frown at him.

“Fine. Ride with us then.” Lisa rolls her eyes.

“We can all just take my truck,” I suggest, but Lauren doesn’t look all that excited about my suggestion either.

“No, it’s okay. I can drive and you can go get Jenna. It’ll probably work out better that way,” she says quietly.

“Great it’s settled. Let’s go,” Lisa links arms with Lauren, pulling her out of the room. Aidan quickly follows them with a wide smile.

Of course Lauren isn’t going to want to ride with Jenna.

I grab my keys and wallet and text Jenna that I’m on my way to her house. I want this night to be fun, even if it has the potential to be a disaster. What the hell was I thinking this morning?

I’ve rung the bell almost five times before Jenna comes to the window and peeps at me from behind the curtain. I can already see she’s scowling.

Oh this is going to be great.

A second later, she jerks the door open. She’s standing there, arms folded.

“What’s wrong?” I sigh.

“Are you serious? You can’t be serious right now?” she says condescendingly. I tilt my head back and take a deep breath.

“Can I come in?” I gesture towards the door.

“So you can insult me and be a complete fucking asshole like yesterday? Who are you, Chris?” she spouts quickly.

“What? What are you talking about?” I am completely confused.

“Oh, let me guess. You don’t remember,” she says sarcastically.

“No, I remember… I remember being here yesterday. Things were going well and then we argued about something. Then I left. I remember us kissing, everything was fine right?” I ask hopefully. Apparently, things weren’t fine.

She begins to laugh. “No. No, things weren’t fine. Things aren’t fine at all, Chris. You were mean and extremely disrespectful. I didn’t even think you were yourself at all. You need help, Chris, and you need it fast,” she says sharply, going back in the house and attempting to shut the door. I stick my foot in the doorway to stop her.

“Back up. What’s going on? What happened?” I ask, and she rolls her eyes.

“Your dad hasn’t talked to you today?” she asks, and I shake my head. “Of course not. Your parents are enablers, complete and utter enablers,” she says to herself.

“What are you talking about?”

“I think I met Cal yesterday,” she says pointedly.

“What?!” I ask in disbelief. “That’s not possible.” He’s gone.

“It’s very possible! I saw you change right in front of my eyes,” she says adamantly.

“No. I remember being here, talking to you. We were on the couch and we argued about something,” I say, trying to connect my thoughts.

“Well, either
he
told me that he wasn’t moving in and basically to go fuck myself or you did. You tell me. Who was it?” she asks angrily and my mouth falls open. There’s no way I would tell Jenna to go fuck herself. I’ve never told anyone to go fuck themselves.

“Wait. Move in together?” I realize what she just said. “Where’d that come from?” I ask.

“We are not having that conversation again,” she says, going in the house. I follow her in. I sit down on the couch and rest my head in my hands.

“I felt different this morning. I felt off, but good. I’ve never felt like that before,” I say aloud, but I don’t even know if Jenna is listening.

“You talked to my dad about this?” I ask her, looking up. She’s standing across from me, hands on her hips. She doesn’t look sympathetic or worried. She looks angry. I can’t blame her, really.

“I came over this morning before I drove out to school. I couldn’t even sleep. I was so angry that it didn’t resonate with me until after you left that it was probably him. I was just so shocked,” she says tensely. I can imagine. Then it clicks. That’s why my dad and Lauren were looking at me like I had horns growing out of my head this morning. My dad must have talked to Lauren. I let out a groan. I can’t imagine how hard it was for her to think I was Cal and then realize I wasn’t.

“I didn’t have a blackout. I wouldn’t call it that because I don’t remember what happens when I black out. I remember being here yesterday, talking to you and going home, it’s just…everything is hazy,” I admit to her. She comes and sits beside me.

“You’ve got to get some help, Chris. No more putting this off. I know that you have a condition and that this other life happened, but it’s different when it’s right in your face. That guys a fucking asshole. If I’d known it was him, I would have kneed him the in groin,” she says, and I laugh. Only I’m not sure if it was him. It’s likely it was, but yesterday was different than what’s happened before.

“I’m going to set up an appointment tomorrow. I promise,” I tell her, sensing her anger starting to slowly subside.

“You have to. This is just too stressful for us to deal with without professional help. You have to learn how to control him and keep him away. Screw integrating or whatever the experts say you’re supposed to do. He needs to go,” she says adamantly.

I nod. It’s not anything I haven’t heard from my dad a thousand times.

“Thanks for not kicking me in the groin,” I joke, taking her hand in mine. She squeezes it back. She doesn’t smile but her frown is gone. I suddenly remember the reason I came here in the first place.

“Let’s do something fun tonight,” I say excitedly. All that’s been happening between us is arguing, fighting, and stress or a combination of all three in the past month. We haven’t had fun in forever.

“Like what?” she asks curiously.

“Skating. When’s the last time you’ve been?” I ask, and she shrugs, a small smile on her face.

“Probably since I was fourteen,” she chuckles.

“Go get dressed. Let’s go,” I say enthusiastically.

“Now? It’s almost nine,” she says hesitantly.

“Come on Jenna. It doesn’t have to be long. An hour, hour and a half tops,” I urge.

She’s thinking.

“As long as we’re back before eleven.” She laughs, getting up and heading to her room.

“Give me ten minutes to change,” she says with a grin. As she changes, I try to forget the fact that Cal told my fiancé to go fuck herself.

If it was Cal.