He'd said nothing she hadn't already considered, but hearing him say it nevertheless made her wince. She tried to come up with something comforting, a way to cheer him up that didn't have a price tag attached.
“Why don't you come swimming along with Zach and me?” she finally suggested. “We can cook out when we get back.” This time of year, at the height of summer, it stayed light out until about nine, but they also had lights on their deck for grilling after dark.
“Maybe tomorrow. I think I'll just stay in and watch TV.”
Uh-oh,
she thought.
That sounds bad.
Usually Milo enjoyed splashing around in the water. He almost seemed to forget about all their problems while enjoying the pool. As comfortable as their old apartment had been, it hadn't offered a pool to cool off in on a hot summer day.
A knock sounded on the door. “Come in, Zach!” she called.
He entered the room, dressed in swim trunks and a decorative T-shirt from Mexico. “Are you ready, Mom?”
She looked uncertainly at Milo.
“Go ahead,” he said. “I'll be here when you get back.”
“Give me a couple of minutes to change,” she said to Zach.
“Okay.” He left, closing the door behind him. Dawn walked to her dresser to get out her bathing suit. She felt Milo behind her even before he said, “Come here.”
She went into his embrace, content just to feel his arms around her.
“I'm sorry, Dawn,” he repeated. “Don't mind me today. I guess I'm just in a bad mood. It's not easy being the ones who are struggling to get by. We never had this problem until we bought this house.”
Her head rested in the nook where his neck met his shoulders. “But we're not the only ones struggling, Milo. Look at Camille and Reuben. He didn't even stop by the Lees' today, and he gets off at 4:30.”
“I wouldn't have either, if I were him. That Camille acts like their predicament is his fault, the way she's always criticizing him. What was that she said on the bus last week? âIf I met a rich guy I'd drop Reuben like he had the bird flu.' Hell, people get laid off every day. I'd be tempted to slap her if I was him.” He mumbled something unintelligible under his breath. “But at least they have a good reason for having it rough. We really don't, other than we should have been better informed and been prepared to crawl before we walked. And now I'm hearing that the bus company is going to raise their rates.”
“That figures. The price of gas is going up. It's cutting into their profits. Besides, there hasn't been a fare hike in two years, so I guess they're due.” Dawn deliberately did not address the first part of Milo's comments. She felt they shouldn't have had to crawl. This year she'd turn forty and he'd turn forty-one. Crawling along at a snail's pace was for people in their twenties. But she kept her thoughts to herself, certain Milo wouldn't be able to appreciate the sentiment.
He didn't appreciate her opinion on the bus company's rate increase, either. “Nice of you to be so understanding of their motives,” he said in a voice drier than hay.
She moved her head so they stood face-to-face. “I didn't mean it that way, Milo. Of course I'm not happy about it. But I understand why they're doing it.”
He leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the mouth. “You'd better get changed.”
“I wish you'd come with us, Milo.”
“I promise that if it's nice tomorrow I'll go with you. It's probably better if I stay home tonight, anyway. Didn't you say you were going to tell Veronica that I wasn't feeling well?”
“Oh, yes, that's right.” It wouldn't look right if Milo suddenly showed up at the pool after not going to the Lees' just a few hours ago. Norman and Veronica wouldn't see him, since they didn't live in Arlington Acres, but Denise and Lemuel might, or one of their kids. Dawn wouldn't want anyone to feel she'd lied to them, even though it was just a little fib.
Milo squeezed her arm. “Go ahead, have fun. And like I said, don't pay me any mind. This, too, shall pass.”
She wondered if it would.
Chapter 39
The Lees
August 2004
V
eronica yawned as she removed clothing from the dryer. She'd just washed two loads, but the clothes sorter still held oodles of dirty clothes. She'd be glad when her niece and Norman's nephew went home, and when her parents got into their condo. This laundry situation had her exhausted.
She turned at the sound of footsteps. Essence's petite frame came into view. “Aunt Veronica, I emptied out the dishwasher and swept and mopped the kitchen floor, like you asked. Can I help you do anything else?”
She thought quickly. “If you can help me get these clothes folded, I'll be finished that much sooner.”
They worked separately to fold shorts, T-shirts, underwear, and towels. Working together, they folded flat and fitted sheets.
“Oh, thanks, Essence,” she said gratefully.
Essence pointed to the assorted socks on the folding table. “We still have to do the socks.”
“No, I save those for Lorinda and Simone to take upstairs. They put away their clothes plus all the linens, and they sort all the socks. All I do is carry upstairs my clothes along with your uncle Norman's, plus Grandma and Grandpa's, so Grandma won't have to come down here.” Veronica gathered two piles of folded clothes. “You might as well get your things now,” she said to her niece over her shoulder. “Chucky will get his things when he comes down.”
After Veronica had given her mother her clean clothes and gone up to the master bedroom to put her own things away, she returned to the kitchen and poured some sweetened iced tea. “Would you like some?” she offered to Essence when she entered the kitchen.
“Yes.” The fourteen-year-old grinned. “I guess we had the same idea at the same time.”
Veronica poured another glass and handed it to Essence. She placed an arm around her niece's shoulders. “Well, Essence, next week you'll be going home, and in a few weeks you'll be starting ninth grade. Are you excited about the new school year?”
To her surprise, the teen merely hung her head. “Essence? What's wrong, sweetheart?”
Essence raised her head and looked at Veronica imploringly. “Aunt Veronica, I don't want to go back home. I want to stay here.”
The plea flustered Veronica and made her temporarily speechless. She hadn't been at all prepared for this reaction. “But there's school, dear,” she said.
“Can't I go to school here?”
Veronica tried a different tack. “Essence, I'm glad you like it here, but what about your mother? I know she misses you, and you miss her.” Valerie had driven down twice during July, sometimes alone and sometimes with a girlfriend, but there was no evidence of any men. Veronica lauded her efforts.
“I do miss Mom, but I'd rather live out here and go to school.”
Veronica fought a rising panic. Essence staying here would cause all kinds of familial problems. Lucy had been scarce since her disastrous fortieth birthday party, but Norman's brothers were sure to create a ruckus if her niece moved in while they were allowed only occasional weekend visits. And on her side of the family, Valerie would swear she'd put Essence up to this.
Instantly she felt ashamed of her selfish behavior. Here she was, thinking only of herself. Essence wouldn't be asking to stay if she wasn't deeply unhappy at home. She had a familial duty to find out why.
“Essence, you have to give me something here. Why don't you want to go back to New York?”
“It's so much nicer here, Aunt Veronica. New York is ugly. Here they have grass and everything.”
Veronica nodded. Grass was a rare commodity in Washington Heights outside of a park setting. What little there was was usually roped off, to be admired only from a distance, like a priceless painting.
Suddenly she recalled Valerie telling her that Essence had gotten into a fight last spring with another girl from the building. “Essence, tell me the truth. Does your wanting to stay here have anything to do with that fight you got in before you came here? Are you afraid that if you go back you'll get hurt?”
Essence scoffed. “Me, afraid of Zena Hawkins? If anything,
she's
afraid of
me.
I was whipping her butt, and I would have finished the job if Mr. Inniss didn't pull us apart.”
Veronica believed her; she looked too serious. But she didn't understand the reasons behind Essence's request. Surely it couldn't be simply because the suburbs had more visual appeal than the city.
“Essence, I think there's something you're not telling me,” she said. “Before we can go any further with this, you'll have to tell me the whole truth. Come on.” She led her niece through the back door, and they sat together on a double-width covered swinging chair. “Okay, let's have it.”
Essence still seemed reluctant to talk, and Veronica suddenly had a terrifying thought. What if she'd been molested by one of Valerie's boyfriends? That would account for her reluctance to talk about it. Just because Valerie hadn't brought any men along with her during her visits didn't mean she'd stopped her frantic dating pattern.
My God, if Essence has been abused, there'd be hell to pay.
Essence began to speak, staring at the grass at her feet. “Aunt Veronica, the reason I jumped on Zena Hawkins was because she called my mom a whore. She said her mother told her my mother has a different man every night, and sometimes two.” She choked back a sob. “Aunt Veronica, I had to beat her up. But I couldn't tell Mom what she said, could I?”
Veronica swallowed hard. So that was it. “No, I guess you couldn't.”
But somebody should,
she thought.
What a mess. But at least Essence hadn't been messed with. Valerie's dating habits being noticed and talked about by her neighbors, even if they were exaggerating, wouldn't do Essence any good.
Veronica fell silent as she thought. She couldn't tell Essence it would be all right, for she had no idea if it would or not. It wasn't her decision to take her niece in. Essence was Valerie's daughter. Valerie would have to approve any change in her living arrangements. And so would Norman.
“Essence, I can't make you any promises,” she said, “but I'll see what I can do.”
Veronica's spirits dropped at the apprehensive look her niece gave her, but it was the best she could do for now.
The Youngs
Dawn watched from a lounge chair as Zach swam laps across the width of the pool. He'd worked so hard to learn to swim, and although he joined his friends in the water he still practiced every chance he got, usually in the last hour the lifeguard was on duty, between 7:00 and 8:00. Dawn insisted that he never swim alone, even after he became experienced, and forbid him to go in the water when the lifeguard wasn't present.
She walked over to the cement lip of the pool as he approached from the other side. She stood and applauded lightly, more like a gesture than an actual clapping noise. “Bravo!”
Zach grabbed the edge and hoisted himself up with folded arms. “Am I getting good, Mom?”
“You've gotten great! Who knows, Daddy and I might take lessons next year ourselves.” It pleased her that he smiled in response instead of doubting her. Between her managing to pay for his swim lessons and being careful not to exchange cross words with Milo in Zach's presence, she felt she'd been successful in putting a halt to his worries.
“Hi there!”
She looked up and saw Reuben Curry with his daughter Shayla. “Hey, Reuben. Hi, Shayla.”
“Mr. Curry, look at me!” Zach turned to his stomach and shoved off, moving his arms in even strokes, his hands cupped.
“Looking good, Zach. What're you doing, training for the Olympics?”
“Just practicing.” Zach stopped swimming and began to tread water in the five-foot-deep water. “Summer's almost over, and I don't want to forget the things they taught me at the Y about the right way to swim.” He paused, probably realizing he'd given something away. “I wasn't doing it right before. That's why Mom sent me there.”
“Ah, you won't forget. Swimming's just like riding a bike. Once you know how you can't forget.”
“Daddy, come on!” Shayla called from the shallow end.
“Excuse me, folks,” Reuben said. “I'm giving Shayla some coaching.”
He walked to the shallow end. Zach resumed doing laps, and Dawn returned to her lounger. She watched as Reuben instructed Shayla on the basics of swimming. He seemed to know what he was doing and seemed to be good at it. She considered that maybe she should have asked him to teach Zach to swim. Look at all that money she could have saved. She would have paid Reuben, of course, but not nearly as much as she'd paid the Y for his membership and lessons.
Once more her gaze went to her son, who was now practicing a different stroke. She decided in an instant that she'd done the right thing. Zach liked doing his practice laps so late because the pool was practically empty, except for an occasional late commuter taking a quick dip before a typically late dinner. Zach would have been embarrassed if Reuben knew he hadn't been able to swim. Mitchell Curry would have found out, and the news would spread to every kid in the subdivision. Her son's pride was worth paying extra for.
Zach had gotten surprisingly good. He'd begun lessons just six weeks ago, and she doubted he'd become a strong swimmer, but he did have good form. The only reason she got to watch him tonight was because she'd taken a couple of vacation days. Milo, who'd gotten a ride with Camille, would probably be home by the time they drove back to the house.
They found Milo at the kitchen table, eating his favorite chicken and rice casserole that she'd taken out of the oven before bringing Zach to the pool. “Damn, I love this,” he mumbled, his mouth full of food.
“Me, too,” Zach said as he ran toward his room to change into dry clothes.
“It feels good to be able to make dinner in the afternoon rather than cook a couple of meals on Sunday,” Dawn remarked as she fixed a plate. Soon she joined him at the table. “Zach has really become a good swimmer, Milo. He's gotten a lot better since the last time I saw him in action.”
“Maybe he can teach us how to swim next year,” he joked.
She chuckled.
“Our anniversary is coming up next month,” he remarked casually.
“Yes, I know.” She wished they were in a position to do something about it, but with all their bills that was mere fantasy. “Maybe we can go to dinner someplace nice.”
That
shouldn't break the bank, she thought.
“I was thinking along the lines of something a little more festive. How would you like a long weekend in New Orleans?”
She looked at him incredulously. “I'd like nothing more, but you know”âshe broke off, realizing that a referral to their current predicament would only serve to antagonize himâ“I mean, it isn't practical right now.”
“To hell with being practical, Dawn. We've been married fifteen years. That's considered a milestone. Besides,” he added with a sly smile, “I've already booked the reservation. I found a deal too good to pass up. You'll have to take off that Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. We'll be back Saturday. I know how difficult it is for you to miss Mondays.” Monday was the day Dawn submitted the payroll, and taking off that day often presented problems for her.
Still, how could he go out and charge airline tickets and make hotel reservations when he knew they were still paying for their expenditures on the cruise? And what about that brake job on the car just a few weeks ago? She'd been late paying two of the credit cards in May, making double payments in June, and both creditors promptly raised their interest rates to a whopping 29 percent. To add insult to injury, both the furniture store they'd bought from and a department store where they had an account began charging them higher rates as well. When she called to object, saying they'd always paid them on time, representatives at both companies told her that they looked at how she and Milo paid their other bills as well, not just the ones from them.
Milo knew about all this, yet he'd gone ahead and booked a vacation on credit? She just couldn't fathom it.
She didn't want to tell him how little she thought of his idea. He took everything so personally these days, and she didn't feel like putting a damper on the day with yet another money argument. Instead she searched for an excuse. She couldn't claim an issue with her job, he'd already avoided any complications by scheduling the trip for the latter part of the week.
“We really shouldn't take Zach out of school so early in the semester,” she said.
“We won't have to. I talked to Camille, and she said Zach can stay with them and go to school with Mitchell.”
“Camille! Milo, she and Reuben are barely making it as it is. When she was here a couple of months ago she mentioned that couple who lived over by her, the ones who lost their house. She never would have brought them up if she wasn't worried about foreclosure herself.”