“What?” I gasped, catching my breath. This wasn’t the reaction I expected from him. Did I do something wrong?
“No. We can’t do this,” he said again.
I turned away, too, feeling embarrassed, rejected again by Lysander.
“No, Alyssa, it’s not that I don’t want you.” He reached out and grabbed my hand, stopping me from getting up and escaping to the bathroom again. “Believe me, I would love nothing more than to be with you. I just can’t. Everyone I care for—everyone I bring into this life—dies.”
It was the first time I had seen emotion like this from him. I took his face into my hands, looking deeply into his eyes.
“You have already saved me from death once, Lysander.”
“Once may not be enough.”
I felt his emotional battle, and understood the mix of signals I had been getting from him. I realized that chance had brought us together that night on campus and his refusal to let me die had entwined our fates.
He didn’t want me to die, but turning me might have sealed that as my future fate anyway. Kallisto’s looming threat weighed heavy on his heart. His other children must have somehow fallen to their deaths by her command.
“Once was probably more than I deserved,” I whispered.
“You deserve to live without worry.”
“There will always be something to worry about, Lysander. You are telling me you won’t get close to me because I might die someday.”
“You are sometimes surprisingly wise, Alyssa, far beyond your short years.”
“Not wise enough to avoid walking darkened streets at night,” I added with a wink and a giggle, hoping to lighten the mood.
Lysander shook his head. “You certainly don’t make this any easier, tempting fate as you do, by always wanting to go off alone. You never listen to my warnings. Kallisto’s threat is real, and I still have not figured out what to do about her coven.”
“What is the deal with this Kallisto lady anyway? Why does she hide behind messengers and her coven?”
“That’s the source of her power. She’s smart, and she’s very good at manipulation. She has an entire army of vampires at her command. That is why she wields so much power.” He sighed. “And, I feel like I can’t protect you, Alyssa. You’re too stubborn for your own good.”
“I know, I’m sorry. I’m not used to people caring for me.”
“I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to lose another person I care for, but if you won’t listen to me, if you won’t let me protect…”
“What if you got her alone?”
“Easier said than done, Alyssa. But…” He held a finger up. His eyebrow arched and a smile crept across his face. “Though you do have a point. Without her coven, she is nothing. She has no real strength or skills to fight.”
“So that’s it! Get Kallisto alone and take care of her. Then our problems with the coven are over, and you can stop worrying about me.” I smiled. “I do like you, Lysander, and I want to get closer to you.”
I leaned in for another kiss.
What was I doing? Shocked again by my own forwardness, I pulled back quickly, looking bash-fully into Lysander’s big blue-gray eyes. “Sorry, I…”
He pulled me onto his lap. I straddled him on the chair. The bulging evidence of his desire in his pants grew larger as I brushed against it.
His lips again found mine, claiming my mouth. I ground into his hardness. His hand snaked up my back and took a fistful of my hair.
A shiver raced down my spine. Gently, he pulled my head backward, trailing kisses down the bare skin of my neck. He awakened feelings I had been trying so hard to ignore. Heat pulsed between my legs. I ground harder into his body. The familiar pinch came as his teeth broke through my skin. I moaned softly, arching my neck further, allowing him to drink. The slow gentle pull of his soft lips at my neck made me swoon.
My body melted as desire burned throughout me. I needed this. I needed Lysander.
I reached out, my hands finding his face as he released my neck. I pushed him toward my lips again and traced the outline of his mouth with my tongue, savoring the tiny drops of my blood left behind. The sugary-sweet taste excited me further. I gripped his hair, tangling my fingers in his feather-soft tresses.
In one quick motion, Lysander got up, lifting me with him out of the chair. Our lips did not part as he carried me to his bedroom.
Lysander threw the door open and tossed me onto the bed. I landed with a bounce, giggling as he dove into bed after me.
“I don’t want to lose you,” he said, between kisses, as we rolled around in the sheets. “Promise me…you will stay…close…until I figure out…how to take care of Kallisto and her coven.”
I felt that nothing, no hidden emotions, were being held back now. The wall he had built had crumbled. His true feelings were on display now, and they told me all I needed to know. He not only desired me, he cared for me too.
“I will,” I said breathlessly. I would have agreed to anything he wanted at that moment. Lost in ecstasy, I feverishly ripped the buttons off his shirt as I pulled away the clothing that restricted me from enjoying him.
Lysander, too, lacked his usual amount of decorum. He fought with a primal urgency to remove my tight jeans.
I haven’t done this in so long. “Be gentle with me,” I cooed as his hand cupped my exposed breast.
He eyed me with a hungry gaze. “Shhh,” he whispered, taking a finger and tracing around my soft patch of curly hair.
Rolling closer to him, I rooted blindly for his neck. I felt the thickness of his erection pressed into my thigh and I couldn’t wait to enjoy it. I wrapped my arms around him and traced the chiseled lines of his back.
Lysander bent his head back, arching his neck in invitation. I smiled, seeing the faint pulse there, just under the skin. I couldn’t resist.
He gasped for breath as I bit down, flooding my mouth with his sweet blood. The tingling head rush hit me at the same moment his finger found my folds. Gently, he parted them, searching for the ball of nerves that would make me melt.
My body burned with need for him. I’d never felt so on fire, so full of desire. My blood felt molten hot, pulsing through my veins.
Lysander expertly flicked and massaged my clit, sending me to heights of pleasure I had never experienced before. Wave after wave of pleasure rolled through my body at his command. A wonderful pressure coiled tightly within me as I spiraled higher and higher towards ecstasy.
I released his neck. Euphoria paralyzed me as he commanded my body, sending me soaring into the heavens. I had no words; Lysander wrung primal sounds of pleasure from me I didn’t know I could make.
His lips returned to my neck, moving slowly down onto my breast. My nipples, now hard little pebbles, were so sensitive that the smallest touch felt like an electric shock. He nipped at them playfully, smiling as I bucked and moaned beneath him.
I praised his name, shouting “Lysander,” to the heavens as he brought me to climax.
But he wasn’t done yet.
He claimed my mouth again. His body pressed against me. I felt his erection, hard and waiting for me. His tongue delved into my mouth, playfully licking at my teeth as he guided me on top of him. Not breaking from our kiss, we rolled over. His swollen tip pressed against my wet and needy opening.
Slowly, he slid inside me.
“Oh, God,” I moaned as the wave of pleasure surged through me.
My body stretched to accommodate his girth. I savored the feeling, the momentary pause. He felt so good inside me. He filled me completely, as if we were meant to fit together.
He thrust his hips, urging me to move with him. Slowly, I rocked, rhythmically pushing him deeper inside.
His hands clasped my butt, guiding me, kneading my ass as we moved together. The wave of pleasure crested. I moaned, throwing my head back as the climax hit me and sent shockwaves of pleasure through my core. The sound of my satisfaction must have sent Lysander into orgasm as well. He held me tight, letting out a low primal growl as he filled me.
For a wonderful eternity, we lay in bed motionless, feeling pleasantly spent, until we gave in to exhaustion and sleep, our bodies still joined together in our lovers’ embrace.
CHAPTER 18
* * * * *
I awoke the next evening wrapped in Lysander’s arms. I smiled to myself as I rolled over to greet my new lover.
It wouldn’t take an empath to know that Lysander was happy. I saw the serene look on his face.
“Good evening,” he said as he reached out to run his fingers through my hair.
“Yes, it is good,” I sighed.
I rested on the pillow, looking up at my Lysander. I liked that thought. My Lysander.
Memories repeated like a broken record, replaying the pleasures of the previous evening over and over.
God, that was good.
Lysander chuckled. “Your mind is like an open book, Alyssa,” he teased. “You make no effort to hide your inner monologue.”
Hide my inner monologue? “What?”
I can hear your thoughts
. His voice was in my head, speaking as loudly as if he had said the words, but his lips hadn’t moved.
“Stop that,” I demanded. “Get out of my head.”
Lysander gave me a boyish grin.
You will have to learn to stop me, then
, he taunted playfully, speaking inside of my head.
Heat rose to my cheeks. I rolled away to hide my red face.
“I did not mean to embarrass you, Alyssa. I am happy I could please you last night. I want you to be happy.”
I felt the pressure of his hand as he rubbed lightly on my back.
“I don’t like you in my head like that,” I grumbled into the pillow.
He ran his fingertips down the length of my arm. “Alyssa, I’m sorry.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you could do this? You’re supposed to be teaching me. How long have you been eavesdropping on my private thoughts?”
He took a deep breath. “I see we are already back to arguing. That did not last long.”
“We wouldn’t argue if you weren’t always hiding things from me. And don’t give me any of that crap about it being in my best interest.”
Lysander sighed. “You are right. I should have tried. I wasn’t sure you were strong enough yet. It can take centuries for young vampires to learn the mental arts.” He pulled at me, trying to get me to roll back over and look at him.
“How long have you been poking around in my head?” I asked.
“It comes naturally to me, Alyssa. It is one of our abilities. I don’t intentionally read you, but you speak so clearly in your own head, it is hard not to hear you.”
I rolled over, shooting him an angry look. I wondered how many times he’d read exactly what I was thinking. What embarrassing information had he been able to glean from my thoughts?
“I was going to teach you how to block this when I thought you were strong enough.”
“How do you know my strength if you don’t test it? Quit coddling me!”
“Fine.” He paused for a moment. His brow furrowed and a faint growl rumbled in his chest. “You always have to find something to fight with me about, don’t you?”
I snapped at him, mocking his tone. “Maybe if you treated me like an adult, instead of—”
“Fine, you want to be tested,” he interrupted, sitting up against the headboard.
“Yes.”
“It won’t be easy.”
“I don’t care.”
“I’m not sure you are ready for this.”
“Quit acting like I’m a baby.” I rolled my eyes.
“Fine, then bite me.”
“What?”
“Just like I showed you before. You are so strong and powerful, try to bite me and make me want it,” he commanded. He crossed his arms, his face suddenly blanked of any emotion.
I closed my eyes and centered myself, calming my nerves. When I opened them, I focused on Lysander, trying to glean his emotional state.
I felt defiance.
Hmm, this is different
.
His emotional wall built up again, blocking my read, not allowing me to see what was lying beneath. The hard, cold exterior I’d come to know was back. He returned to the Lysander he’d been before we’d had sex.
I gave him my most determined stare, trying to match the power in his eyes with my own.
You want me as I want you
, I thought, calling up the desire I felt for him, willing him to feel the same. Lysander broke my stare. He yawned and stretched, completely unaffected by my attempt.
“You’re not off to a very good start, are you, Alyssa?” His tone mocked me.
What the hell? Why isn’t this working
?
I again tried to call up my feelings and regain our connection.
I mounted him, pushing him down to the mattress, and stared down at his face. Again, I tried to will my feelings to him, but Lysander’s face was not placid, it was determined. He was fighting against my efforts, and I could see I was having no effect on him.
Am I doing something wrong? Why isn’t this working
?
“Because I do not allow it.”
His eyes remained locked into mine, giving me the full force of his powerful stare. A gray haze rolled into my head and suddenly I felt stricken with unexplainable fear.
Lysander pushed me off him, and I flopped backwards on the bed. He rolled me onto my back and forced my hands above my head. Terror filled me, paralyzing me as he held me to the mattress. He straddled my torso and lowered his head to my face.
“Fight me,” he taunted, showing me his sharp fangs.
Lysander towered over me. His eyes glowed eerily. His face appeared twisted with rage.
“Do you think you are strong enough now?” he growled. “Is this what you wanted?”
I couldn’t move. My heart raced, pounding in my chest. I gasped for air as he inched his evil face closer to mine. His teeth grazed my skin.
I shouted, “No!”
Lysander retreated, sitting next to me on the bed.
Still panic-stricken from his mental attack, I lay there trembling, wondering why he had done this.
He stroked my hair. “It’s all right, Alyssa, calm down. It was only a test.” His voice became soft and almost melodic. “You asked for this. Remember, it does not pay to be filled with hubris, for Nemesis is always close behind.”