Authors: Nicole Grane
“Just let me die,” I whined as I pulled myself back to the toilet and vomited once again. I collapsed back to the floor, pressing my cheek to the cold stone. My eyes watched the room rock back and forth. I closed them, hoping to still the spinning world.
“Phoebe, you’re scaring me. Please open the door.” Marcus was jiggling the handle.
“I can’t,” I whimpered again.
“Why not?” Raymose asked in the same worried tone as Marcus. Apparently they were both hovering outside the door. Well at least they weren’t ripping each other’s heads off I thought.
“Because I’m sick!” I finally yelled out, annoyed they’d ask the obvious. I was sure they were both able to hear me retching. “I’ll be out in awhile. I just need to lie here . . . and die,” I added quietly. I closed my eyes again, hoping the nausea would pass—soon.
I lay there for a good half hour before I tried to sit up. I felt frozen having been on the cold floor for so long. I crawled over to the bathtub and started the water. My head rested on the side of the tub while I waited for it to fill. I poured a little rose water into the bath, hoping the smell would wake my senses. It seemed to be working. The walls weren’t shifting around so much anymore.
I went to the sink and brushed my teeth. The strong mint flavor of the paste tickled my senses more, bringing me out of my fog-like trance. I undressed and slipped into the warm water, hanging my arms over the edge of the tub, taking care not to let the water reach my newly bandaged shoulder.
I closed my eyes . . . my mind drifted back to the forest . . . I could still feel Damen’s mouth on my shoulder . . . his teeth sharply pressing into my skin.
My body jerked violently with a start, splashing water from the tub. I sat straight up. My heart pounded in my chest. With a trembling hand, I reached up and felt my shoulder. It was still bandaged. No bite marks.
The sound of water spilling over the tub onto the floor brought me out of my reverie. I reached over and quickly turned it off. I held my face in my hands, trying to steady myself.
There was a gentle knock at the window. I looked over to see Marcus's head poking in. “May I come in?”
I nodded. “Sorry about that,” I said when I saw him looking around at all the water on the floor.
“Didn’t you notice how high the water was?” Marcus was already grabbing towels to sop up the mess.
“No, I . . . fell asleep . . .”
“Wonderful, now I have to worry about you drowning?” he said, as if he was adding one other item of concern to his list.
“Sorry.” My voice sounded so far away, as if it had come from someone else. “Let me help you clean that up.”
“No, I got it, I’m nearly done anyway,” he insisted as he pushed the towel around the floor.
“Is Raymose still here?”
Marcus looked up. His eyes were a soft brown, almost golden—he’d just eaten. “No, he’s on his way to see Luther.”
“Why?” I choked.
“If the werewolves are going to be here sooner than we’d planned, we need to be prepared.” His tone was business like.
“Werewolves!” I jumped up abruptly, splashing water and bubbles as I reached for my towel.
“What are you doing?” Marcus asked.
“I’m not just going to sit and soak in a tub when we’re about to be invaded by werewolves. We need to do something!” My mind was once again clear.
“Not we,” he warned, launching the towel into a corner. “Phoebe, I’d already decided to have Richard put you on a plane today. I don’t want you anywhere near here,” he said firmly. “The further you are from Aidric and Luther, the better.”
“There is no way I’m leaving you now. Damen said you were outnumbered.” I stepped out of the tub and vigorously dried myself off.
Marcus put his arms around me, holding me from behind. “You’re not coming with me.”
“Marcus you need me, even Raymose said you did. I can help. I’ll be careful, I promise. I already feel lots better.” It was a necessary lie.
He turned me around. His hands rested on my shoulders. I winced at the pressure. “The other wolves will not be so merciful,” he warned, running a finger across my bandage.
“I won’t need them to be.” My resolve was strong. He wasn’t going to change my mind. If there was any way I could help them, I was going to do it.
Marcus smiled affectionately at my stubbornness. “The vampires will smell the fresh blood.” His eyes narrowed. “I know you think I am strong, but even I won’t be able to fight them all off you.”
I didn’t have a response to that. I’d been so worried about werewolves; I hadn’t considered my safety around the other vampires.
“I told you before I’d protect you. But I can’t do it if you’re taking risks.” He looked desperate just then. He pulled my body to his, careful of my new wounds. His mouth took mine aggressively, taking all that I had to give. When he pulled back, we were both breathing heavily. “Nothing matters more to me in this world than you.”
I sighed. I knew exactly how he felt. I reached up and placed the palm of my hand against his cheek—he leaned into it, absorbing my touch.
“Marcus. They’re going to kill Luther. I can’t let them.” I watched the smile slip from his face. “I know this doesn’t make sense to you, Luther doesn’t even know I exist, but he’s the only father I have left.”
Marcus's mouth fell open. “You would risk your life . . . our
child’s
life . . . to save Luther’s?” The very idea sounded inconceivable.
“I can’t explain it,” I began. “I feel drawn to him. He needs me.” I was just as shocked as Marcus was when I realized how I felt about this man I’d never seen in this life.
“Phoebe.” Marcus gripped my arms, shaking me slightly. Luther will take
your
life!” His words were sharp. “You’re not a vampire anymore,” he warned. “You’re—” he released my arms abruptly and turned away from me, his body seething with anger.
“A werewolf! Is that what you were going to say?” I shouted angrily. “A werewolf!”
“It’s the truth,” Marcus hissed over his shoulder. “As far as anyone else will see it. Luther will sense it immediately. I can’t let you anywhere near him, not ever. He won’t quibble about what percent werewolf you are. He’ll simply destroy you.”
I tried to let that sink in, but my heart wouldn’t let it. My heart told me that Luther needed me. That once he saw me, he’d remember he loved me. Even if he didn’t, I couldn’t turn my back on him. I couldn’t let them murder him.
“Have you forgotten the other heart beating within you?” Marcus interrupted my thoughts.
My mouth popped open. “You can hear the baby’s heart beat?” I gasped. I hadn’t expected that. It was too soon, wasn’t it? I still hadn’t quite come to grips with what was happening inside me. Then: “That’s how Damen knew isn’t it? He must have heard the heartbeat too.”
A small hiss escaped from behind Marcus teeth.
“Marcus. What would Luther do to you if he found out you were hiding me from him?”
“My deception would be . . . unforgivable.”
“Because you kept his daughter from him? Or because of what I am?” I asked.
“A little of both I expect.” He touched my cheek with his hand. “As Raymose said, a mixing of the species is . . . unthinkable.” His words were firm.
I knew Marcus accepted the laws of his kind and supported and respected Luther without question. That’s why the next thought had me immediately on edge. I dreaded the question before I’d asked it. “And the punishment for such a betrayal?” I held my breath. I suspected I already knew the answer. I cringed, praying I was wrong.
He tilted his head a little as he sighed. The look in his eyes made me feel sick once again.
“I see.” I gave him a small smile and stalked to my closet. I began searching through the clothing Richard had retrieved as promised.
“Phoebe, you must understand; it doesn’t matter to me how others see you. I don’t look at you that way.” He sounded desperate.
“I understand.” I donned a shirt and pants in record time. I wasn’t sure what was coming, but I knew that I couldn’t face it naked.
“What exactly do you understand?” He sounded almost patronizing now.
“I understand that because of me, you could be killed.” I tied on my shoes.
Marcus took my hands and brought them to his chest. His eyes, sought mine. “I’m not worried about it. I’ve managed to hide you all this time. Raymose will keep our secret. There is no reason Luther would ever find out about you.”
“Aidric! It’s only a matter of time before he tells Luther about me.” I looked concernedly into Marcus’s eyes. “
I’m
just part of the deception. What would Luther say if he knew we were going to have a baby?”
Marcus's face fell. I could see real fear in his eyes. It morphed into anger. “I will protect you—both of you.” His resolve was stronger than ever.
“At what cost?” I closed my eyes, shaking away the image. This wasn’t going to happen. I wouldn’t let it. If I were gone, Marcus would be safe. He could deny being with me because technically, we wouldn’t be together . . . Luther hadn’t seen me . . . he’d just assume Aidric was lying.
I knew deep down Marcus would never let me go without him, especially now. He was so protective of me. I also knew that Luther would question Marcus's absence if he were to suddenly disappear. He would most likely question Raymose as well . . . we’d be putting him in terrible danger. I had to find a way for Luther to accept us. It was the only way to guarantee all of our safeties.
“Don’t think on it any longer.” Marcus reached out and held my face in his hands, his soft eyes melting me where I stood. “I’ll protect you both—or die trying,” he added darkly. “Would you believe me capable of anything less?”
I gave him a flat smile. How could I not love this man? And how could I not protect him? “No.” I shook my head, answering him at last. “I wouldn’t believe you capable of anything less.” I kissed his lips.
Marcus had informed me that Charlotte and Sarah were taking a brief holiday to go visit their families. This of course was a ruse he’d concocted to ensure their safety. Not to mention he didn’t want to have to explain why we were suddenly being overrun with wolves.
We said our goodbyes after dinner. Charlotte had made a mouth watering roast that had enough leftovers for a week’s worth of meals.
Marcus had told her that he would be taking me on a little trip the day after tomorrow, so she needn’t worry about us eating.
I left Marcus and Raymose in the library to finalize their plans. I couldn’t stand to listen any longer. Despite Marcus's reassurance, Raymose was still uneasy about their numbers—which of course added to my level of tension.
I walked slowly up the staircase and down the long hall. The castle was quiet. No Charlotte clanking about in the kitchen. No Sarah humming along as she did her chores. The house felt dead, and I didn’t have any life to add to it.
I found myself standing in the center of my bedroom looking around me. I suddenly felt very alone. The room was filled with so many memories of past and present—I couldn’t bear to think of being here without Marcus. I shook the image away; I couldn’t afford to dwell on it.
I sat myself down in a chair by the window and looked out across the lawn. The sunlight had all but disappeared. I cracked the window open a little and let the night breeze waft in. I sat back, closed my eyes, and tried to relax. I breathed in deeply—a familiar scent met my nose. My eyes popped wide open. I jumped up, throwing open the window. I leaned out as far as I could, straining my eyes as I searched the darkness.
“There you are . . .” I whispered as I saw him standing by the garden, not fifty yards away. I considered my safety for a moment. He wouldn’t hurt me, would he? He obviously wanted to see me. It was at great personal risk that he came—especially tonight of all nights.
I turned and moved quietly as I snuck downstairs and out the doors. I ran as fast as I could through the darkness. The moon’s light was directly overhead and lit my way beautifully. Damen was standing near the roses. He had picked one and was extending it out to me.
I approached him slowly. My hand shook a little as I took it from him. “Thank you.” My voice was suddenly hoarse. Perhaps this hadn’t been a good idea to meet him alone after all?
“I’m afraid its beauty pales next to yours,” he said as he circled me slowly.
I could feel my heart begin to race. I was uneasy having Damen so close to me. Any other woman would welcome such a handsome, well-spoken man paying her attention. I, on the other hand, found it unnerving. Damen looked at me with such desire, such absolute longing. The tension was unbearable.
“You must want to know why I’ve come.” He moved closer still, the heat of him pressing upon me.
“Damen, you shouldn’t be here.”
“Yet you rushed out to see me.” He grinned.
“Marcus and Raymose are inside; if they catch you . . .”
“Are you worried for my safety?” He touched my cheek with the tips of his fingers, caressing it. “You do care for me, don’t you?”
I gave him a dry look. “What do you want Damen?”
“I wanted to see if you were foolish enough to have stayed. To have ignored my warning.” He shook his head, a look of pity hung on his face now. “You think you can save him, don’t you?”
I didn’t answer.
“Do you honestly think you’re strong enough to fight alongside him? Would he be such a
fool
to let you try?”
“I won’t let him die!” I yelled, tossing the rose back at him.
His eyes lit up. I’d given him his answer.
“He needs me. He . . . just doesn’t know it yet.” I’d said this a million times to myself already, but somehow saying it aloud to Damen made it seem foolish. Who was I trying to convince, really? I shifted uneasily.
“So much time has passed . . . yet nothing has changed.” His voice was condescending.
“What are talking about?” I folded my arms across my chest.
“You’ve walked this path before . . . have you not? And here you are yet again, ready to sacrifice your life, and that of your unborn child’s, in the hopes to save his? He is not worthy of it.”
I glowered at him. He cut me to the quick and he knew it. “
You
took that life, not me. And Marcus
was
saved,” I reminded him curtly.
“A tragedy that will not be repeated,” he snarled. “He cannot be allowed to live when he hunts us so freely!” I could see the hatred in Damen’s eyes.
“Well then we have a problem, don’t we?” My voice sounded unlike my own. It was strong and confident. “You’re not going to touch him.”
He laughed wickedly, his eyes gleaming like diamonds in the moonlight. “Are you threatening me?”
I took a short breath, taken aback by the direction the conversation had turned. “Yes.”
He sneered, his yellow eyes full of malice. “You think you can stop me?”
“If I had to.” The words slipped between my lips. They weren’t as strong as I’d hoped—confirmation that I doubted myself. “I feel stronger every day.” I held my chin high.
“True. With each full moon your strength grows . . . but not enough for what is to come.”
I scoffed.
“Let it begin then.” I had no time to react. He grabbed my shoulders and threw me like a rag doll across the ground. I skidded to a stop, landing on my newly bandaged arm.
I cried out in agony.
Damen had already closed the gap between us, yanking me violently to my feet. I winced as his fingers dug deep into my jaw. “You cannot win . . . not as you are,” he growled. “Soon, you will beg me to turn you.” He tossed my body effortlessly, sending me into one of the garden statues. It toppled over, breaking my fall. “Imagine what Aidric will do to you,” he mocked as he stared down at my quivering body.
“You can break every bone I have Damen . . . I won’t let you hurt Marcus.”
Even in the limited light, I could see his fury wash over his face. His chest heaved in and out as he made his way over to me. “Marcus's fate has been decided,” he snarled. “As has yours.”
I’d somehow found the strength to pick myself up off the ground. My body felt like a shell—not even my own. It ached from head to toe. Every inch screamed with pain. Yet, a small fire had lit within me. “I won’t let you turn me,” I stood my ground. “I’d rather die than become a werewolf!”
“And so you shall.” His foot connected with my chest a second later, my breath escaping me on impact. He snarled as he moved toward me.
I lay on the ground several yards away, gasping for air. My vision too blurred to see him clearly.
“I have the power to save you,” he sneered, “and your child.” He baited the hook. “If I turn you now, your heart will still beat.”
“No,” I cried. Had it come to this? My life would be spared if I agreed to let Damen turn me completely . . . my soul for immortality? The baby would live . . . a life for a life. There had to be another way.
I stared up at him, my body . . . too sore to move. “You’re not the only one who could save us,” I choked, spitting blood from my lips.
His laugh was chilling. “You’d rather be a vampire?”
“Is it possible?” My voice edged on desperate.
Damen’s expression grew more sinister, as if that were even possible. “You think the vampires are going to welcome you—an abomination like the child that grows within you?” He dropped down beside me, his face pressed hard against my neck, as he inhaled deeply. “Blood doesn’t lie,” he breathed into my ear. “You. Are. A. Werewolf.” He lifted me into his arms then flung me to the side, taking out a small wooden arbor with my body. I cried out in agony. I thought all the bones in my body had broken. By all rights, they should have. But I could hear things snapping back together.
“You said you loved me,” I sobbed, trying to rise to my knees—I fell back to the ground, disoriented. “How can you kill me when you love me?”
“I
do
love you!” he roared. “It’s because I love you that I must do this! I’ve waited far too long for you, Phoebe.” His mind was absolute. Damen looked upon me, his expression wild, his patience was spent—he was through ‘playing.’ He wanted me—now! “You won’t come freely, but you will concede,” he threatened darkly. A low growl came from behind his teeth.
“Damen—” He had me by the throat, his fingers cutting into my skin.
“Can I offer immortality to you now?”
“I don’t think you want to continue doing that,” a voice spoke coldly—I recognized it at once. Thank God!
“Raymose . . . what a surprise.” Damen pressed harder against my throat. “You may want to step back old friend; there’s an awful lot of blood,” Damen said with a grin.
I gasped for air. “Damen . . .” My voice was barely audible.
“Let her go!” Marcus hissed.
“I don’t think I can do that,” Damen laughed without humor. “Now that you know I’m here, I can hardly leave unscathed . . . and I have so much work ahead of me tomorrow . . . or should I say today!” He added cheerfully, ignoring my gurgled pleas. “Besides, Poor Phoebe here wouldn’t stand a chance against two vampires. It would be cruel of me to let her go. As I said . . . there’s an awful lot of blood.” There was a twisted pleasure in his tone. He was enjoying their torment at my expense. I struggled beneath him, my fingers desperately trying to pry his hand away from my throat.
“Hasn’t centuries of reflection taught you that you can’t win her affection by beating her to death,” Raymose hissed, he was inching toward us, his black eyes deadly.
“I won’t lose her—not again!” Damen threatened. His grip on me tightened, nearly causing me to blackout.
“She’s not yours to lose!” Marcus spoke through gritted teeth. He circled us, slowly, waiting for an opportunity to strike. “Let her go—now!”
“Not a chance,” Damen snarled as he positioned me between them. His teeth were too close to me—a fact Marcus was all too aware of.
Marcus's eyes met mine. I could see the pain in them. It almost mirrored my own. “You’re killing her!” he screamed.
“Not her! Just the child you so foolishly created. I’m prepared to turn her.” He tightened his grip around me. “Her body will heal.” He pivoted so fast; his forearm now crushed into my throat. I gagged. My fingers desperately tried to pry his arm away.
He began backing up, trying to put some distance between them and us. My feet struggled to keep up. They slipped, causing me to choke myself even further.
“I warned you before not to ask me to spare its life again,” he breathed into my ear.
Marcus moved closer. His black eyes fixed on Damen. “
I will kill you
.”
“
You will try
.” Damen let out an unholy roar, his body exploding into a giant wolf.
I fell from his grip—Marcus caught me before I hit the ground. I managed to see Raymose colliding with Damen a second later.
Marcus shielded me as he crashed through my bedroom doors, holding my bloodied body in his arms. He laid me down on the bed, his eyes wide with fear.
I curled up into a ball, not caring if Death came for me. I’d welcome him. “It’s ok Marcus, go . . .” I choked on the blood in my mouth.
His crimson eyes wandered over my body—he hadn’t realized how bad I was. I could see the torment on his face. The eternal fight that burned within him now—there was too much blood.
He shook his head. “I’m not leaving you.” His voice was barely recognizable. He closed his eyes, composing himself. He knelt down beside me. His hands shook as they reached out to me.