In the Garden Trilogy (88 page)

The orgasm was like a burst of light, a stunning flash that blinded her, set her body on fire then left it to glow. She felt herself slide toward oblivion, then come back into the bright, bright world of swimming sensations. Her body was awake, alive.

Then his mouth found her and sent her spinning beyond pleasure. It was a roiling heat that built and built, then gushed through her so that she was weak and wavery when he dragged her to her knees.

He looked at her, into her it seemed, so deep she thought he must see everything she was. And his mouth took hers in a kiss that made her heart tremble.

So this was love, she thought. This utter trust and surrender of self. This complete gift of heart that left you open, defenseless. And full of joy.

She touched her hand to his cheek, her lips curving as she shifted, as she wrapped her legs around him. “Yes,” she said, and took him into her. “Yes,” then arched back with a moan as the beauty swamped her.

He lowered his brow to her shoulder, barely able to breathe as she closed around him. But he drew her back to him, heart against heart. Not close enough, he thought. It could never be close enough.

Her arms locked around him, her mouth found his as they rocked themselves toward the edge, and over.

T
HERE WAS PROBABLY
something more relaxing than sprawling on a big bed, limbs tangled with your lover’s after mind-melting sex. But Hayley figured it was probably illegal.

In any case, she’d take this shimmery afterglow.

As far as romantic nights, this one left everything else she’d experienced in the dust. Gliding on it, she curled her body a little closer to his, and smiled dreamily when his hand stroked over her back.

“That was wonderful,” she murmured. “You’re wonderful. Everything’s wonderful. I feel like if I stepped outside right now, this light inside me would blind the entire population of Memphis.”

“If you stepped outside right now, you’d be arrested.” His hand slipped lower. “Better just stay right here with me.”

“You’re probably right. Mmm, I feel so loose.” She stretched like a cat. “I guess I was pretty blocked up, you know? Self-servicing isn’t nearly as satisfying as . . . Oh God, I can’t believe I said that.”

His shoulders were already shaking as he snorted out a laugh. He hooked an arm firmly around her before she could roll away. “Happy to be . . . at your service.”

She buried her face against his shoulder. “Things just jump out of my mouth sometimes. It’s not like I’m a sex maniac or anything.”

“Well, now you’ve shattered my dreams.”

She cuddled closer, tipped her head up. “It’s nice being here like this. I mean just like this,” she said, and feathered her fingers through his hair. “All soft and warm, snuggled up in bed. I wish we could just stay, and tonight would just go on and on.”

“We can stay, and when tonight stops going on, we can have breakfast right here in bed.”

“That sounds amazing, but you know I can’t. Lily—”

“Is sound asleep in the Portacrib we moved into my mother’s sitting room earlier today.” When her eyes widened, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Mama was practically rubbing her hands together with glee at the prospect of keeping her overnight.

“Your mama . . .” She pushed up on her elbow. “God, did everybody know about this but me?”

“Pretty much.”

“Roz knows we’re . . . that’s just very strange. But I don’t think I should—”

“Mama said to remind you she managed to raise three boys, keep them all alive and out of jail.”

“But . . . I’m a terrible mother. I want to stay.”

“You’re not a terrible mother. You’re an awesome mother.” He sat up as she did, took her shoulders. “You know Lily’s fine, and you know Mama loves having her.”

“I do. I do know that, but . . . what if she wakes up and wants me? Okay,” she said with a sigh when he just lifted his eyebrows. “If she wakes up, Roz’ll handle it. And Lily loves spending time with her, and Mitch. I’m being a cliché.”

“But you’re such a pretty one.”

She looked around the room. Beautiful, sumptuous—absolute freedom. “We can really just stay?”

“I’m hoping you will.”

She bit her lip. “I don’t have any . . . things, you know? Not even a toothbrush. A hairbrush. I don’t have my—”

“David packed you a bag.”

“David . . . well, that’s all right then. He’d know what I’d want.” She felt giddy little bubbles rising up in her throat. “We’re just staying?”

“That’s the plan. If it’s okay with you.”

“If it’s okay with me?” she repeated, and a gleam came into her eyes as she launched herself at him. “Let me show you what I think about that.”

L
ATER
,
SHE CAME
rushing out of the bathroom. “Harper, did you see these robes? They’re so big and soft.” She stood rubbing a sleeve against her cheek. “There are two of them, one for each of us.”

Lazily, he opened one eye. The woman, he thought, was proving to be insatiable. Praise Jesus. “Nice.”

“Everything in here is wonderful.”

“Romeo and Juliet suite,” he murmured, almost drifting.

“What?”

“The suite. It’s the Romeo and Juliet suite.”

“Really, but that’s . . .” Her brows drew together. “Well, if you think about it, they were a couple of teenage suicides.”

On a laugh, he opened his eyes. “Trust you.”

“I never saw it as being romantic. Tragic is what it was—and plain stupid. Not the play,” she corrected, turning a circle to swirl the robe. “It’s brilliant, but those two? Oops, she’s dead, I’ll drink this poison. Oops, he’s dead, I’ll stab myself in the heart. I mean,
Jesus,
and I’m babbling.”

“What you are,” he said, staring at her, “is fascinating.”

“I get pretty opinionated about books. But whoever it’s named for, the suite’s downright awesome. It just makes me want to dance all around it, buck-ass naked.”

“I knew I should’ve brought a camera.”

“I wouldn’t mind.” Holding the robe up like a cape, she swirled once more. “I think it’d be sexy if we took naked pictures of each other. Then when I’m old, and all brittle and wrinkled up, I’d look at myself and remember being young.”

She bounced onto the bed. “You got any naked pictures of yourself?”

“Not so far.”

“Look at you.” She tickled his knee. “You’re embarrassed.”

“Not entirely.” Oh yeah, he thought, she was fascinating. “You got any?”

“Never trusted anybody enough before. And I’ve got this bony build. But you didn’t seem to mind it.”

“I think you’re beautiful.”

He meant it, and wasn’t that a miracle? She could see it in his eyes. She’d felt it in his touch. “I feel beautiful tonight.” She rose, wrapping the white robe around her. “All plush and lush and decadent.”

“Let’s order dessert.”

She stopped twirling. “Dessert? But it’s almost two in the morning.”

“They have this amazing invention called twenty-four-hour room service.”

“All night? I’m such a rube. But I don’t care.” She plopped back down on the bed. “Can we eat it up here? In bed?”

“The rules attached to twenty-four-hour room service are if you order after midnight, you’re required to eat in bed. Naked.”

She grinned wickedly. “Rules are rules.”

They lay belly-down, facing each other, with a plate of chocolate-soaked cake between them.

“Probably going to be sick,” she said as she ate another mouthful. “But it’s so good.”

“Here.” He stretched out an arm, managed to grab one of the glasses on the floor. “Wash it down.”

“I can’t believe you ordered another bottle of champagne.”

“You can’t do naked chocolate cake without champagne. It’s declassé.”

“If you say so.” She drank, then forked up more cake and held it out for him. “You know . . .” She wagged the fork at him. “On the date-o-meter you’re going to have to go a ways to top this one. I don’t think I can settle for
anything less than, oh, a wild weekend in Paris or maybe a quick jet to Tuscany to make love in a vineyard.”

“How about a sun-and-sex-soaked sojourn to Bimini.”

“Sex-soaked sojourn.” She gave a tipsy giggle. “Say that five times fast.” On a moan, she rolled over to her back. “If I eat another bite, I believe I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”

“Can’t have that.” He set the plate aside. Then easing forward, closed his mouth over hers in a lingering upside-down kiss.

“Mmm.” She rubbed her lips together when he lifted his head. “You taste very potent.”

“Got a nice chocolate high going here.”

She smiled as he slid down to her, as his hands trailed over her breasts, her torso, her belly. Then gasped when his lips nibbled away.

“Oh my God, Harper.”

“I forgot to mention this part of late-night dessert.” He shifted, reached out. Swirling a finger through cream and chocolate, he smeared it lightly onto her breast. “Oops. I’d better get that off.”

S
HE FELT SO
smug and cosmopolitan, stepping out of the elevator into the lobby with her overnight bag. It was nearly noon, and she was just wandering into the day. She’d had breakfast in bed. The fact was, she thought, she’d had about everything in bed that was available in the State of Tennessee.

She imagined even her toenails were glowing as a result.

“I’m going to check out.” He nipped a little kiss on her lips. “Why don’t you sit down?”

“I’m going to walk around. Look at everything. And I want to pick up a few things in the gift shop.”

“Be right back.”

She let out a happy sigh. She wanted to remember everything. The people, the fountain, the tidy bellmen, the shiny displays of art and jewelry.

She bought a little quacking duck for Lily, and a silver frame as a thank-you gift for Roz. Then there were the sweet duck-shaped soaps, and the pretty yellow cap that would look so cute on Lily. And . . .

“No man in his right mind turns his back on a woman in a gift shop,” Harper said from behind her.

“I can’t help it. Everything’s so pretty. No,” she said when she saw him reach for his wallet. “I’m getting these.” She set all her items on the counter, then picked up a canister once it was rung up. “This is for you.”

“Duck soap?”

She inclined her head. “To commemorate our stay. We had the best time,” she told the clerk.

“I’m glad you enjoyed the hotel. Are you here on business or pleasure?”

“Just pleasure.” Hayley gathered the bag. “Just lots and lots of pleasure.” She tucked her free hand into Harper’s as they strolled back into the lobby. “We’d better get home before Lily forgets what I look like and . . . oh man, just
look
at that bracelet.”

The display showcasing a local jeweler glittered and shone, but all Hayley could see was the delicate bracelet with sizzling white diamonds framing gleaming ruby hearts.

“It’s drop dead, isn’t it? I mean it’s elegant, even delicate, and the heart shapes make it romantic, but something about it just says: Hey, I’m an important piece. Maybe because it’s an estate piece. Antique jewelry has such a—what’s the word I want. Panache,” she decided.

“Nice.”

“Nice,” she said and rolled her eyes at him. “Such a guy. What it is, is stunning. Some of the other pieces in there have bigger stones, more diamonds, whatever, but this is the one that stands out. To me, anyway.”

He scanned the name and address of the store. “Let’s go get it.”

“Sure.” She laughed up at him. “Why don’t we pick up a new car on the way, too?”

“I like my car. The bracelet would suit you. Rubies would be your stone.”

“Harper, paste is my stone.”

She tugged his hand, but he continued to study the bracelet. The longer he looked at it, the more clearly he could see it on her. “I’ll just talk to the concierge.”

“Harper.” Distressed now, she stepped back. “I was just looking. That’s what we girls do—we look in shop windows.”

“I want to buy it for you.”

It was more than distress now, and closer to panic. “You can’t buy me something like that. It probably costs—I can’t even guess.”

“Then let’s find out.”

“Harper, just wait. Just . . . I don’t expect you to buy me expensive jewelry. I don’t expect you to do things like this.” She gestured to encompass the hotel. “It was the most incredible night of my life, but it’s not why—Harper, it’s not why I’m with you.”

“Hayley, if it was why you were with me, you wouldn’t be. Last night was for us, and it meant every bit as much to me as it did to you. I’ve got enough of my mother in me that you should know if I do something like this, it’s because I want to. I want to buy this for you, and if it’s not out of my range, that’s what I’m going to do.” He kissed her forehead. “Just hang here a minute.”

Speechless, she watched him walk to the concierge desk.

And on the drive home, she continued to be speechless at the way the ruby hearts in their diamond frames glittered on her wrist.

S
HE FRETTED FOR
the rest of the afternoon, and lavished attention on Lily. It was a strange and, she imagined, strictly maternal sort of juggling act to balance the fact that she’d missed her baby girl with the fact that she’d had the most wonderful time without her.

Guilt, she thought, came in many forms. By the time Roz got in from work, Hayley had built up a sputtering head of guilt.

“Welcome home.” Roz stretched her back, eyed Hayley who stood in the foyer. “Did you have a good time?”

“Yes. Wonderful. Beyond wonderful. I should start out saying you raised the most incredible man.”

“That was the goal.”

“Roz, I can’t thank you enough for keeping Lily that way.” Unconsciously, she covered the bracelet on her wrist with her other hand. “It was more than I could expect.”

“I enjoyed it. We all did. Where is she?”

“I wore her out,” Hayley said with a weak smile. “All but kissed the skin off her bones. She’s taking a quick nap. I got you a gift.”

“Isn’t that sweet.” Taking the box, Roz strolled into the parlor to open it. And beamed when she found the frame, already spotlighting a picture of her with Lily. “I love this shot. I’m going to put this on the desk in my sitting room.”

“I hope she didn’t give you any trouble last night.”

“Not a bit. We had ourselves a fine time.”

“I—we—Harper. Hell. Can we sit down a minute?”

Obligingly, Roz sat on the sofa, propped her feet on the table. “I wonder if David’s made any lemonade? I could drink a gallon.”

“I’ll go get you some.”

Roz waved toward a seat. “I’ll get my own in a minute. Tell me what’s on your mind.”

Hayley sat, stiff-backed, her hands folded in her lap. “I got to know the mothers of some of the guys I dated. We always got along okay. But I never . . . it’s so surreal to be good friends with the mother of a man I’m . . . romantically intimate with.”

“I’d think, all in all, that would be a bonus.”

“It’s not that it isn’t. I suppose it would be less surreal if I’d gotten to know you, gotten to be friends with you
after
things became—”

“Romantically intimate.”

“Yeah. I don’t know how to talk to you about it, exactly, because the relationships are all tangled together. But I wanted to say, to tell you, that you raised an amazing individual. I know I did that, but I want to say it again. Harper went to so much trouble, took such care to give me something special. There aren’t many like that, at least in my experience.”

“He’s a very special man. I’m glad you see that, and appreciate it.”

“I do. He had this beautiful suite, and flowers and candles. Champagne. No one’s ever done anything like that for me. I don’t just mean the lavishness, you know? I’d’ve been fine with a plate of ribs and a motel room. And how crude is that,” she muttered, closing her eyes.

“Not crude. Honest. And refreshing.”

“What I mean to say is no one’s ever taken that time, that care to plan a whole evening with me in mind.”

“It’s a disconcerting thrill to be swept off your feet.”

“Yes.” Relief poured through her. “Yes, exactly. My head’s still spinning. I wanted you to know that I’d never take advantage of his nature, his consideration.”

“He bought you that bracelet.”

Hayley jolted, clamped a hand over it. “Yes. Roz—”

“I’ve been admiring it since I came in. And watching you rub your hand over it, guiltily. As if you’d stolen it.”

“I feel like I did.”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous.” Roz’s eyebrows drew together as she waved a hand. “You’ll irritate me.”

“I didn’t ask for it. I told him not to. All I did was admire it in the window, and the next thing you know he’s making arrangements with the concierge and the jewelry store. He wouldn’t tell me how much it cost.”

“I should hope not,” she said staunchly. “I raised him better.”

“Roz, these are real stones. It’s an antique. It’s a real antique.”

“I’ve been on my feet most of today. Don’t make me get up to get a closer look at it.”

Emotions in turmoil, Hayley stepped over, held out her wrist. Roz simply tugged her down on the sofa. “That is a
beauty, and certainly suits you. How many ruby hearts are there?”

“I wouldn’t count them,” she began, then lowered her head at Roz’s bland stare. “Fourteen,” she confessed. “With ten little diamonds around here, and two between each heart. God, I’m crass.”

“No, you’re a girl. And one with excellent taste. Don’t wear that to work, no matter how much you want to. You’ll get it dirty.”

“You’re not upset?”

“Harper is free to spend his money as he sees fit, and has the good sense to spend it with some discrimination. He gave you a lovely gift. Why don’t you just enjoy it?”

“I thought you’d be mad.”

“Then you underestimate me.”

“I don’t. I don’t.” Tears swam into her eyes as she burrowed against Roz. “I love you. I’m sorry, I’m so twisted up. I’m so happy. I’m so scared. I’m in love with him. I’m in love with Harper.”

“Yes, honey.” Roz curled an arm around Hayley, and patted gently. “I know.”

“You know.” Sniffling, Hayley reared back.

“Look at you.” Smiling a little, Roz brushed Hayley’s hair away from her damp cheeks. “Sitting here crying, happy, scared tears. The kind a woman sheds over some man she’s realized she’s crazy about, and doesn’t know quite how the hell it happened to her.”

“I didn’t really know until last night. I knew I liked him, that I cared about him, but mostly I thought I wanted to bang him. Then . . . Oh God, oh God, I actually said that.” Mortified, she pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes and rubbed. “See why this is surreal? I just told Harper’s mother I wanted to bang him.”

“I admit, the situation is a bit unique. But I think my sensibilities can handle it.”

“It all just opened up inside me last night, everything opened up and poured through. I’ve never felt like that.” Hayley pressed a hand to her heart, and the rubies glittered. “I’ve never been in love before, not all the way in love. And I thought, when it happened, that this is it, this is how it feels when you fall. Don’t tell him.” She gripped Roz’s hand. “Please don’t tell him.”

“It’s not for me to tell him. It’s for you, when you’re ready. Love’s a gift, Hayley, to be taken and received freely.”

“Love’s a lie, an illusion created by weak women and conniving men. An excuse for the middle class to breed and their betters to ignore so they can marry within their own station and build more wealth.”

Roz felt the shudder run through her, and her breath back up in her lungs. But she straightened, continued to look in the eyes that were no longer only Hayley’s. “Is that how you justified the choices you made?”

“I lived very well on my choices.” She lifted her arm, smiled as she trailed a finger over the bracelet. “Very well. Better than those I came from. She was content to serve on her knees. I preferred serving on my back. I could have lived here.”

She rose, wandering the room. “I should have. So now I am here. Always.”

“But you’re not happy. What happened? Why are you here, and so unhappy?”

“I made life.” She whirled, cupping a hand over her belly. “You know the power of that. Life grew in me, came from me. And he took it. My son.” She looked around, those eyes darting. “My son. I came for my son.”

“He’s gone now, too.” Roz rose slowly. “Long ago. My grandfather. He was a good man.”

“A baby. My baby. Little boy, sweet, small. Mine. Men, men are liars, thieves, cheats. I should have killed him.”

“The child?”

Those eyes glittered, bright and hard as the diamonds on her wrist. “The father. I should have found a way to kill him, all of them. Burned the house to the ground around them, and sent us all to hell.”

There was a chill, and the pity Roz had once felt couldn’t chip through the ice of it. “What did you do?”

“I came, I came in the night. Quiet as a mouse.” She tapped a finger to her lips, then began to laugh. “Gone.” She turned a circle, holding her arm high so the rubies and diamonds flashed. “All gone, everything gone. Nothing left for me.” Her head cocked, her gaze turned to the monitor, and Lily’s waking cries.

“The baby. The baby’s crying.”

Her head lolled as she slid to the floor.

“Mitch! David!” Roz rushed across the room to drop down beside Hayley.

“Got a little dizzy,” Hayley murmured, passing a hand over her face. Then she looked around, groped for Roz’s hand. “What? What?”

“It’s all right. Just stay down a minute. David.” Roz glanced over her shoulder when both men hurried into the room. “Get us some water and the brandy.”

“What happened?” Mitch demanded.

“She had a spell, an episode.”

“Lily. Lily’s crying.”

“I’ll get her.” Mitch, touched Hayley’s shoulder. “I’ll go get her.”

“I remember. I think. Sort of. My head hurts.”

“All right, sweetie. Let’s get you onto the couch.”

“Little queasy,” Hayley managed when Roz helped her to her feet. “I didn’t feel it coming, Roz. Then it was . . . it was stronger that time. It was more.”

David brought both water and brandy, and sitting on Hayley’s other side, put a glass of water in her hand. “Here now, baby doll, sip some water.”

“Thanks. I’m okay, feeling better. Just a little shaky.”

“You’re not the only one,” Roz said.

“You talked to her.”

“We had quite the conversation.”

“You asked her questions. I don’t know how you held it together like that.”

“Have a little brandy,” Roz suggested, but Hayley wrinkled her nose.

“I don’t like it. I feel better, honest.”

“Then I’ll have your share.” Roz picked up the snifter and took a healthy swallow as Mitch came in with Lily.

“She’ll want her juice. She likes a little juice when she gets up from a nap.”

“I’ll get her some,” Mitch told Hayley.

“No, I’ll take her in. I’d like to do something normal for a few minutes.” She got to her feet, reaching for Lily as Lily reached for her. “There’s my baby girl. We’ll be right back.”

Roz got to her feet when Hayley left the room. “I’m going to call Harper. He’ll want to know about this.”

“I’d like to know about this myself,” Mitch reminded her.

“You’ll want your notebook and tape recorder.”

“W
E WERE JUST
sitting there talking. I was telling Roz what a wonderful time I’d had last night, and showing
her the bracelet. And—sorry Harper—but I was telling her I felt guilty about you buying it for me. And I guess I got emotional.” She sent a pleading look at Roz, clearly begging confidence. “And then she was just there. Like a bang. I’m a little bit vague on it. It was like hearing a conversation—like when you hold a glass to a wall to hear what people are saying in the next room. All sort of tinny and echoing.”

“She was amused, in my opinion, in a nasty sort of way,” Roz began, and took them through it.

“She was accustomed to receiving gifts for sex.” Mitch scribbled in his notebook. “So that’s how she’d equate the bracelet Hayley’s wearing. She wouldn’t understand,” he continued, hearing the quiet sound of distress she made, “generosity, or the pleasure of giving for the sake of the gift. When something was given to her, it was an exchange. Never a token of affection.”

Hayley nodded and continued to sit on the floor with Lily.

“She came here,” he continued. “By her own words she came here at night. She wanted to cause harm to Reginald, perhaps the entire household. Maybe even planned to. But she didn’t. We could assume harm came to her here. She said she was here, always.”

“Died here.” Hayley nodded. “Remains here. Yes. It felt like that. Like I could almost, almost, see what was in her head while it was happening. And that’s what it felt like. She died here, and she stays here. And she thinks of the child she had as a baby still. She’s the way she was then, and in her mind—I think—so is her son.”

“So she relates to, is drawn to, children,” Harper finished. “Once they grow up, they’re no real substitute for hers. Especially if they happen to grow up into men.”

“She came to help me when I needed it,” Roz pointed out. “She recognizes the blood connection. Acknowledges
it, at least when it suits her. Hayley’s heightened emotions brought her out. But then she answered questions, she spoke intelligently.”

“So I’m a kind of conduit.” Hayley fought back another shudder. “But why me?”

“Maybe because you’re a young mother,” Mitch suggested. “Close to the age she was when she died, raising a child—something that was denied her. She made life. It was stolen from her. When life is stolen, what’s left?”

“Death,” Hayley said with a shudder. She stayed where she was when Lily ran over to Harper and lifted her arms to be held. “She’s getting stronger, that’s how it felt. She likes having a body around her, having her say. She’d like more. She’d like . . .”

She caught herself twisting the bracelet, and stared down at it. “I forgot,” she whispered. “Oh God, I forgot. Last night, when I was dressing, checking myself out in the mirror. She was there.”

“You had one of these experiences last night?” Harper demanded.

“No. Or not like this one. She was there, instead of me, in the mirror. I wasn’t—” She shook her head impatiently. “I was me, all the way, but the reflection was her. I didn’t say anything because I just didn’t want to go around about it last night. I just wanted to get out awhile, then everything . . . it went out of my mind until now. She wasn’t like we’ve seen her before.”

“What do you mean?” Mitch sat, pencil poised.

“She was all dressed up. A red dress, but not like what I was wearing. Fancy gown, low-cut, off the shoulders. Ball gown, I’d guess. She wore a lot of jewels. Rubies and diamonds. The necklace was . . .” She trailed off to stare at the bracelet in speechless shock.

“Rubies and diamonds,” she repeated. “She was
wearing this. This bracelet. I’m sure of it. When I saw it at the hotel, I was so pulled toward it. I couldn’t see anything else in the display. She was wearing this, on her right wrist. It was hers. This was hers.”

Mitch left his seat to crouch on the floor by Hayley and examine the bracelet. “I don’t know anything about dating jewelry, about eras along this avenue. Harper, did the jeweler give you a history?”