Into the Blackness (Blackness Series Book 4) (33 page)

“She called me an ungrateful little shit and told me my trust fund is gone,” he says in a shrug.

“Merry Christmas,” I drone sarcastically.

“No shit. I guess they just got the papers from their attorney about their parental rights bein’ removed. She said if I was so lonely I should have spent more time with the staff at the house.”

“Jesus Christ,” I blow out in frustration.

“My…uh…past dad?” Dane struggles with what to call him. “Anyway, he called too. Told me I’m cut off and to have all my shit removed from their property before they return to the country. I told his dumb ass I moved out in September. He hung up on me. The best thing is I already emptied my bank account before Christmas so I’ve got enough money to last a while.”

“You put that money in your savings account and don’t touch it. You’re not responsible for providing for yourself. That goes for all of you. That’s my and Nick’s job.”

“You shouldn’t have to do that,” Sawyer chimes in. “I’ve got a shitload of money now and once we sell my old house I’ll have even more. I can take care of myself.”

“I don’t care if you can, you don’t have to. We’re your parents now and that means we provide for you. Your parents have used money as a weapon, whether to buy you boys off or to keep you where they wanted you. That stops now. You boys keep whatever money from your past and use it for your future. But for now, I don’t want their money providing for my kids.”

“Okay,” they grumble in unison.

“Are you worried that we can’t give you the lifestyle you’re used to?” I ask quietly.

“What?” Cole asks aghast. “No fuckin’ way. We just don’t wanna be a burden.”

“Say that again and I’ll ground you,” I threaten.

“Okay,” he laughs at my idle threat.

“Where’s Dad?” Dane asks and I love the sound of it so much I forget to answer.

“Mom?” he prods.

“Sorry. He was talkin’ to Shannon and now I think he’s wrappin’ up some stuff with Shane.”

The boys believe Shane is our attorney. It was an easy lie to explain his presence at the hospital with Sawyer.

“Who’s Shannon?” Sawyer growls defensively.

“She’s his best friend. Really she’s the only family he has outside of us. So I guess that makes her like your aunt or something,” I explain as truthfully as I can.

“His best friend’s a chick?” Sawyer asks like that’s the weirdest thing he’s ever heard.

“Hey, I’m a chick. What’s wrong with havin’ a girl as a best friend?”

“I don’t know. Doesn’t it get weird? Like what if he realizes he wants to be with her instead of you or something?”

“Dude,” Jake growls.

“I trust Nicky. He loves me and he loves Shannon, but it’s different. Plus Shannon has her own man, a baby and she’s pregnant with twins. I’m not worried. They’re just friends. When you meet her you’ll understand. And you’ll love her because she’s as crazy as me.”

“So Dad has a thing for crazies?” Dane teases.

“He has a thing for hot crazy ladies,” I deadpan.

“No question,” Nick’s deep voice echoes through the room.

We all chuckle at his admission as he moves to stand behind us.

“And as for your questions about Shanny, let me clear that shit up. I’ve known her since I was a kid. In my ten-year-old brain I thought she was the girl I’d spend my life with and then I met your mom and I realized I would spend my life with Shanny…as my best friend. Because Kat is everything I want and need in life. She gives me things that Shanny never could. Shanny found her future with another man and I found mine with your mom. It doesn’t change that we love each other. We’re just friends though…well that’s not true. She’s my family just like you are.”

“You think she’ll like us?” Cole asks sweetly.

“She’ll fuckin’ love you all. And be warned she’s a unique brand of crazy. She’ll boss you around and spoil the shit outta you,” Nick finishes with a kiss to my hair and a squeeze of my shoulder.

“Sounds good to me,” Dane spouts, turning the video game back on.

It feels good to give the boys some honesty about our life. I’m glad that Nick has Shannon to offer the boys. From what I know of her she’ll be a good addition to their lives. And the boys deserve as much good as they can get. I hate that they just assume a husband being around another woman means trouble. I want them to see that relationships mean something outside sex and money. I’ve only got a few years before I lose them to college and I want them going into that time in their lives confident about what their futures can hold.

“My turn,” Nick announces jumping over the back of the couch, snatching a controller away from Sawyer.

“Prepare to have your ass handed to you, old man,” Dane goads.

A cocky smile splits Nick’s face as he enters some game where they go about killing zombies and other creatures. I don’t watch the game as much as I watch the boys. Sawyer stays glued to Nick’s side and plays vicariously through him, often barking out orders. Dane and Cole chide and tease along with encouraging and defending their father. This is the life we all deserve. I fall asleep with a smile on my lips and a stronger beat to my heart than I’ve ever experienced. Fulfilled.

Nick

“I hear you’ve made some enemies,” Phil whispers as we greet each other for our first poker night since Christmas.

“That so?” I ask releasing his hand, preparing for whatever is coming.

“The Benningtons and Ashcrofts are not happy with you and your wife,” he says with a pointed look.

I offer a shrug of indifference. I don’t give a fuck what they think or how they feel.

“How’s the Lancaster kid doin’?” He changes the subject quickly as Tony joins us.

“Sawyer’s healing. Broken ribs take time and he’s losing patience, but other than that he’s doin’ good. Thanks for asking.”

“And your wife?” Tony asks with a peculiar look on his face.

“It’s been rough on her,” I lie. “She’s seeing a local therapist and it seems to be helping. It’s been good to have the holidays at home for her to recover. I don’t think she’ll ever get over that day though.”

This is the lie we’ve been carefully spinning. Kat had to murder a man to save Sawyer and she’s struggling with it. I don’t think Kat’s actually ever thought about it again. It’s how we’re trained. If anything, I think she feels good about it. Maybelle needs to believe the opposite. They need to think it was as traumatizing for her as it would be for any normal person. This is also the in for us. Once people know she’s pregnant on top of having the boys officially as ours it’s easy to start looking for domestic help. Slow and steady it is.

“I can’t imagine how you’re managing with all that,” Phil responds with a little aggression in his voice that I recognize from the real world outside
Stepford
. Either he genuinely feels bad for me or he’s uncomfortable with the attention of the murder and rumors. My guess is the latter.

“It’s not easy.”

“Well, let’s play some poker so you can kick all our asses,” Phil says with a clap on my back.

I offer him a chin lift and move to the table. Phil and Tony stay where I left them, whispering about something. I wish I had a bug in here now. Kat tried to get one in this house yesterday. She was here for a lunch with some other
Stepford Wives
. When she got back she said she had the distinct feeling it was a test. Like Trish was watching her and sizing her up in a way she hasn’t before. With that in mind, she kept the bug. If the Bookers sweep their house for bugs as often as I do, they’d know it was Kat that planted it.

The murder and guardianships have gotten us a lot of attention. It’s been mixed at best. The boys will go back to school in a couple weeks and have found most of the kids they go to school with don’t really give a shit about anything that’s happened with custody. They are very intrigued about the murder. The texting and facebooking and whatever the hell else the boys do to interact with their peers has been in overdrive. Teenagers.

The boys have kept tight lipped about the murder outside of our house. We’ve told them they can discuss it with people or not, it’s up to them. We’ve got Sawyer in therapy and offered it to the others, but they’ve declined so far. I’m still not certain the beating was because Sawyer wasn’t home to check on Patricia. I know what Sawyer remembers as he took his beating is true, but something doesn’t play for me. I’ve beaten enough people in my life that I know what motivates that behavior. A uninterested parent and absent husband doesn’t beat his kid to death for behaving the same way. Jess has been digging into every aspect of the Lancasters’ life to try and get a handle on what was actually going on in that house. She’ll find it, whatever it is.

The townspeople have been cautious with us. Most of the looks Kat receives are that of pity or curiosity. I’ve seen plenty looks of disdain too. The boys have gone into protective mode of their mother, Jake being the worst. If they see any looks or hear anything they don’t like they’re quick to cut that shit off. I’ve had no effect on this behavior, yet I beam with pride every time I witness it. I have good kids. No, I have great kids.

I’ve settled into this idea quicker than I anticipated I would. I’m a father. No question, no hesitation, nothing but proud love. I have four sons and I’m going to have a baby this summer. Tomorrow is our first doctor’s appointment, and fuck if I’m not nervous and excited. Tomorrow’s a big day all around because we’re expecting the results of the DNA test for Cara. The more I’ve thought about it the more convinced I am that Cara is Shanny’s sister. Kieran hasn’t been able to get answers out of Vito Mancini as of yet. I’m confident he will though. Kieran has ways of persuasion that he’ll be employing. I bizarrely feel like Kieran and I are becoming friends. Even though I’ve known him my whole life we didn’t run in the same circles. It’s the connection to “the life” that offers us common ground combined with our love for Shanny. Fucking weird and good all at the same time.

Kat and Shanny have been talking on the phone a lot since I introduced them a few days ago. They chat with Quinn too. The three of them are sure to cause massive amounts of trouble once they’re in a room together. I’m thankful they’re all pregnant and living in different cities at this point because it will lessen the shit they can do, barely. But those three not pregnant for a night out…God help Kieran, Kellerman and me (the world at large).

All of this family building and friendship creating has me craving a normal life more than usual. I want what we have in Maybelle without the rest of the shit swarming around us. I want evenings with basketball practice and family dinners. I want lazy weekends playing video games with the boys. I want nights with Kat wrapped in my arms followed by mornings where she hasn’t moved from my grasp. I’ve had a few days of that back and I feel like a crack addict getting a fix after a dry spell. I haven’t had sex with Kat yet. I don’t think she’s there with letting me back in. I’m dying to get back inside her. I’m jacking off more than the boys combined and that’s saying something. The whiskey tonight isn’t going to help my resolve to let her work at her own pace.

We’re a few hours into the game and I’m a few grand up, not really even trying, when my phone buzzes in my jacket pocket. I swipe the screen to find a text.

Sawyer: Help

I jump up from the table knocking my chair back with a thud. Most of the group startles as I slide my arms into my jacket without an apology.

“Nick, what’s wrong?” Phil asks with concern in his voice.

“Something’s wrong at the house,” I growl, stalking out of the room.

I hear the men grumbling and a few footsteps following me. I burst out of the front door and sprint to my driveway. I can hear slaps of feet pacing me, but I don’t check to see who’s with me. I wish I had a weapon on me right now. There’s a car in my driveway…Patricia’s. Fuck!

I go to open the front door and find it locked.

“Do you have keys?” Phil asks out of breath.

“No,” I snarl. “I’m goin’ around back.”

“Let’s go.”

He takes off running like he’s as nervous as I am. I come to the glass wall at the back of the house to find it dark. There’s no movement inside, no lights on. Shit. I try the back door, locked.

“You wanna break the glass?” Phil asks, looking around for something to use to shatter a window. The house is outfitted in special glass that won’t break on impact. I don’t really want him to know this. So instead of answering, I take a step back and scan the house for an open window. It’s winter so I’m doubting there will be any open, but it’s my only shot. The laundry room on the top floor is cracked open. The boys’ dirty clothes stink so bad that Kat airs it out every once in a while.

“Window’s open,” I say nodding at it.

“And how are you gonna reach it?” Phil looks at me like I’m nuts.

I pull off my jacket and heave myself up the drainpipe running the length of the house. It’s wavering under my weight so I move quickly. Climbing a wall in slacks and dress shoes is not something I’m used to so I’m moving slower than I’d like. I slip a few times and feel the pipe pulling away from the house, spurring me to move faster.

I reach the cracked open window and fight to push it up while I support my weight on the windowsill. Silently, I slink in, sliding over the counter. When my feet hit the ground I pull my shoes off. The heels make noise on our hardwood floors and I don’t want anyone knowing I’m coming.