Gannon tightened his grip. It made my ribs throb but I didn’t care. “Calm down. We need to go. Let’s get your…”
“Calm down?
Calm down
?” I don’t know how I managed to sound shrill and snot-garbled all at once. “That thing broke into my home. My
home
, Gannon! He knows where I live. He trashed every single fucking thing I own but he didn’t
take
anything.” I flung an arm in the direction of my laptop and jewelry, lost in the wreckage. “He wanted me to know he could do this. That he could find me and hurt me, any time he wants. So don’t tell me to calm down!”
He didn’t argue. I saw the conviction in his eyes, in the grim set of his jaw. The troll had found me. I couldn’t stand anymore. I felt myself falling, but thankfully he was there to help lower me to the floor. He propped me up against the door frame and turned away, walking back out onto the landing with phone in hand. I could only hear the low murmur of his voice, but I didn’t care. Eavesdropping held no appeal for me now.
I curled into a ball, right there in my bedroom doorway, gasping for breath around my rising panic. He had trashed my stuff. My things—
everything
—ruined. Tainted. I knew logically that I should be happy he had taken his aggressions out on my material items rather than my body but; still. These were the things I had worked so hard for over the years. Every little bit and piece I owned. It only made things worse that he had invaded my home to do so—the one place I had always counted on to be there for me, when I needed to retreat from the world. There was no safe place for me now. There was nowhere for me to go that he couldn’t find me.
“Caitlin.” Gannon had squatted down beside me. I peeked up at him through watery eyes. “We need to go. He might come back. It’s not safe here.”
“Go where?” I snapped. I could barely breathe around the knot in my chest.
“You’ll stay with us,” he said, still maddeningly calm. But why wouldn’t he be? It wasn’t
his
life that was scattered all around him in ruins. It wasn’t
his
last bit of normalcy that had been ripped from his grasp. I tucked my head back down into the cradle of my arms, too ashamed of my breakdown to let him see my tears.
“I’ll gather some of your things.”
I stayed huddled in my little ball of misery. I had only begun to realize that my life could never return to the normal I had once known when I was forced to push Jenni away. Now, in hindsight, it was the best idea I had ever had. I couldn’t imagine living with myself if she had been hurt by those monsters.
All that time, I had feared what evil lurked in the hearts of strangers; out there, passing by on the streets. I had feared being attacked, like the night Goliath and I had first crossed paths. I had never stopped to consider what else he could take away from me, of how deeply he could hurt me, without ever laying a finger on me.
Chapter Twenty
That bastard.
It was some time after midnight but I was wide awake, unable to find the blissful ignorance of a good night’s sleep for the third night in a row. I refused to look at the clock on the nightstand out of pure spite. Instead, I stared up at the darkened ceiling, missing the familiar crack in the plaster that would have been there had I been in my own bed. Not that it was my bed, not anymore. Nothing was mine anymore. Everything I had once loved now carried that creature’s foul taint.
My hands had curled into fists of their own volition.
I just couldn’t let it go. I mean, how could I even try to? Goliath had tracked me back to my home. He knew who I was, that much was painfully clear. Those ham fists of his had smashed by last bastion of safety to little bitty pieces. The thought of that beast rifling through my things—the spiteful glee that must have come across his ugly mug as he ripped apart my life… My fists curled so tight my nails bit into my palms. The whole situation made me sick to my stomach.
I had been living with the fae for just about two weeks. The first few days had been strange, to say the least. It had been a sort of perverted Real World situation: me in the midst of a melt-down, forced to live among four strangers who weren’t really strangers (but who were definitely strange). Lucky for me, Seana and Mairi had been incredibly supportive of my fragile state of mind. Being forced into such close quarters with them had turned out to be rather pleasant, kind of like having a mother and little sister by my side day in and day out. They weathered my alternating fits of rage and crying jags with grace.
My co-habitation relationship with the boys was another matter. Kaine had given me a wide berth from day one. Like most men faced with the prospect of dealing with a hair-triggered, hysterical woman, he opted instead to steer clear of me. He didn’t go out of his way to avoid me, per say, but a suspicious number of other tasks seemed to come to his mind the moment I entered a room. That was just fine with me. I still couldn’t get a handle on how to deal with him and, given the current shambles of my life, I didn’t even want to try.
Gannon and I, on the other hand, were clearly on the outs. We hadn’t spoken a single word to one another since that night. He had gone out of his way to avoid me all together and wasn’t making any attempt to hide it. Our paths hadn’t crossed more than twice since my change of residence, and then for only the briefest of moments.
I supposed that would change soon, as Seana had cleared me to resume fighting, but in the interim I had done a good job of pretending our estrangement didn’t bother me. Fuck him and his holier-than-thou attitude. Even if I had deserved some of the riot act he had read me that night, he could have softened up just a bit when he saw that my whole world had pretty much just gone to shit.
The image of my decimated bedroom flashed through my mind.
My stomach churned.
I hadn’t been able to make myself go back. Filing a report with the police, knowing full well that it would be a fruitless search, had been hard enough. Going back there and seeing again the proof that my days of blithely pretending I was leading some cool, secretive double life were over? I just couldn’t handle that. Not yet. Thankfully, Mairi knew and understood. She had gone back for me and had picked up a bunch of clothing without my even having to ask. Living in a borrowed home was bad enough. I don’t think I could have handled having to wear borrowed underwear too.
I don’t know how long I laid there, stuck on my internal merry-go-round of anger and despair, but I must have dozed off at some point. When a hand gripped and shook my shoulder, accompanied by a whisper of my name, I went into DEFCON 3 mode and nearly clocked the figure looming over me in the dark.
“Jesus, Caitlin, it’s me. Stand down,” Gannon said. He had taken a step back to avoid my wild swing. Damn his preternatural speed; I bet I had almost had him. He turned on the bedside lamp, as if I needed visual proof that he was who he said he was. I was momentarily dumbfounded to see that he was dressed in his hunting leathers, sword sheathed across his back and everything. It took me another moment to realize that if I was puzzling over his choice of pajamas, that meant he could also see me. In bed. In my lack of pajamas.
“Gannon!” I yanked the sheet up to my chin as I scrambled to pull my bare leg back beneath it. “What the hell?”
He started to say something, but appeared to think better of it; biting his lip. He barely kept the grin off his face as he said, “You’re not…
indecent
, are you?”
I could feel the heat flooding my face. That boyish charm was like kryptonite, damn him. Something in that single word that went straight to the core of me. Traitorous core! We didn’t like him much at the moment, remember?
Thankfully I wasn’t; not really. I had fallen asleep in a ratty old V-neck t-shirt that had seen far better days and a slightly embarrassing pair of orange and black striped panties that said “Tiger” in gold across the rear. Not something I wanted anyone to see me in, but at least my naughty bits were covered. Since I had fallen asleep on my back and the sheets had remained largely at stomach level, my secret was still safe. I strove for indignant and ignored his question, countering it with one of my own, “Is there a reason you’re barging into my room at”—I glanced over at the alarm clock, rounding up a smidge—“3:30 in the morning, dressed, quite literally, to kill?”
That earned me another one of those smirks; the ones where he eyed me from under one raised eyebrow, looking all confident. And cocky. And stupid. He jerked his head toward the open door, the hallway beyond dimly lit. “I found him. Get dressed. We leave asap.”
I stared at him, slack-jawed, and tried to put two and two together. Maybe it was the remnants of sleep, or maybe it was just the distractions of my traitorous core and the thoughts that smirk of his made it think, but I kept coming up with five. “Him? Him who… Wait, do you mean the troll?” My voice rose to a squeak on the last word.
He waved a hand, shushing me. “Of course ‘the troll.’ Who the hell else have I been scouring the city for? And his name, by the way, is Argoth.”
“He has a name?” I was still speaking in tones suited for dolphins, my adrenaline having kicked in to high gear. How dare a vile creature like that have a name? Knowing his name, rather than just calling him Goliath or Ugly or half a dozen other insulting nicknames like I had in my head all along, humanized the monster in a way I couldn’t accept. My fists were balled up again, shaking.
“Of course he has a name. Now, come on. I found where he’s been holed up but I don’t know what his next move will be. He could make a run for it any time, so we need to do this quick.”
There was no way in hell I was giving that beast a shot at getting away from us, not when we were finally so close to ending the reign of terror he had inflicted upon my life. I shot out of bed, scrambling to untangle myself from the sheets that tried to follow me. My mind was mind racing. Where had I stashed my leathers? Were my shitkickers in the closet or under the bed? Had I sharpened the girls before putting them away after the last hunt? I didn’t know if I trusted my dexterity to do so in a moving car on the way. Hell, would I even be able to grip them again, now that my hands had healed? It would be my first time fighting since…
“Caitlin.”
I froze; spine gone ramrod straight. There was something dangerous in the calm of his voice. I turned, hands still gripping the edge of the dresser drawer. He had his arms crossed, those icy eyes fixed on mine. “This could go bad real fast. I need to know you will listen to every word I say tonight, and will do every single thing I tell you to do. No arguing. No hesitation.”
We could not have a repeat of the black dog fiasco. It was unsaid, but I heard it loud and clear. I nodded, lips pursed. “Understood.”
He nodded once in return and turned toward the door. “Then get ready—and do it quietly. The others would have a fit if they knew I was taking you along on this.”
Something smart-assy tried to make its way out of my mouth but I swallowed it down. I knew this hunt was out of my league. I had already seen firsthand how big and strong trolls were. I held no illusions that I was anywhere near a match for that, and it was no surprise that Kaine would have put the kibosh on me tagging along. Squatting at the fae house had made me privy to some very loud shouting matches coming from Kaine’s office. The danger his treasured Lynx Detector had put herself in had not gone unnoticed by the Lord of the Manor. While I had secretly gloated over knowing that Gannon had gotten chewed out way harder than he had done me, it had to have left an impression on my teacher. Which made me wonder why he was sticking his neck out for me again at all. I had to know. “Why?”
The one word was enough. He paused, hand on the door-frame. I could only see him in profile. He was chewing at his lip again. “He’s your nightmare. You need to see this through to the end.”
As often as I wanted to kick him in the nuts, Gannon understood me in a way few ever had. I swallowed hard, my throat tight. My eyes stung. “Thank you.”
He turned ever so slightly and smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “You’re welcome.”
I yanked opened the drawer and dug for my gear.
“Meet me at the car in five, Tiger.”
I whirled around, clutching at my butt like that would somehow help the situation, but he was already gone. A faint chuckle echoed down the hallway. My face was on fire again. I snarled; fuck him. I would get him back for that later. Right now, we had more important things to do.
I had a troll to kill.
~*~
“You’re fidgeting.”
“Of course I’m fidgeting,” I snapped, glancing over at Gannon from the passenger’s seat. “We’re finally going to nail this bastard. How could I not be excited?” And scared damn near shitless. I left that part out but I was pretty sure he already knew. He kept his eyes on the road, never sparing me a look, so I tried to do the same. Companionable silence was a-okay by me. We were almost there. My frenzied mind was racing over the possibilities of what lay ahead of us again and again.
It was hard not to be equal parts excited and scared. I had been waiting for this very moment for so long. The promise of safety and the ability to breathe again were damn near at my fingertips. Yet, the danger we were walking in to was pretty damn frightening too. I knew how freaky strong that troll was. A girl didn’t forget the night when she had been picked up by the scruff of the neck like a newborn kitten. I held no illusions: Goliath wasn’t going to go down easy.