Authors: J.A. Konrath,Jack Kilborn
Tags: #General Fiction
Andy took a deep, calming breath and the effects of the adrenaline in his system began to wear off. Race opened the gate and they began their trek back down the hallway.
“The world really is going to hell, isn’t it?” Andy said.
Race grinned. “Sure is. And we’ve got a front row seat.”
B
reakfast was light but nourishing, consisting of banana muffins, sausage, and coffee. The coffee was the only thing fresh. The food, like all food in the compound, was frozen and then microwaved. Race told Andy that refrigeration had been possible since the compound was created, but the small group of people who lived here didn’t warrant the constant trips to refresh supplies. Instead, two huge freezers were stocked several times a year with everything from cheese and bread to Twinkies and Snickers. Milk, an item that didn’t freeze well, was available vacuum-packed.
“How many people are here right now?” Andy asked, stirring more sugar into his coffee.
They sat on orange chairs at a Formica table with a sunflower pattern. Green 2—or the Mess Hall as Race called it—doubled as both a dining area and a kitchen. The decor, save for the microwaves, was pure 1950s cafeteria.
“Eight, including you. The holies, the priest and the rabbi, leave for brief periods every so often. Everyone else is here for the long haul. Believe it or not, except for the isolation and the fact that you don’t see the great outdoors, this is almost like a resort. We’ve got a sauna, a four lane swimming pool, a full library, even a racquetball court.”
“Who foots the bill for all of this if only the President knows about it?”
“Social Security. Now you know why the benefits are so low.”
Andy used his fist to stifle a yawn. The food was settling well and he suddenly realized how tired he was.
“I’ll show you to your room,” Race said. “If you haven’t had a chance yet, take the time to make a list of things you need from your apartment; clothes, books, whatever. I know you’ve got some things already en route, toiletries and such, but anything else you might need, just holler. That goes for things you might need for research too. We have a blank check here, no questions asked. Back in the sixties, as a joke, two guys asked for a Zamboni. Came the next day. Sure pissed off President Johnson. That man could curse like no one I’ve ever met.”
“I’m still not convinced I’m staying.”
“That’s fine, but it’s a funny thing about Bub. We’ve had people scream, faint dead away, become downright hysterical the first time they see him. But we’ve never had one leave without finishing their job. Curiosity is a powerful motivator.”
It also killed the cat,
Andy thought.
They left the Mess Hall and headed down the Blue Arm via the Octopus. As they walked, the door to Blue 5 opened and a woman came out into the hallway. She was petite, and the lab coat she wore was too big for her even though the sleeves had been rolled up. Her hair was blue-black and cut into a bob, perfectly framing a triangular Asian face.
Andy was immediately entranced. It had been a long time since he’d been in the presence of a beautiful woman. The last was his ex-girlfriend, Susan. Pre-Susan, he’d dated a lot. His looks were okay, but the ability to speak in dozens of languages was something women really liked. Post-Susan, he’d been a desert island. She’d taken more than just his heart. She’d taken his confidence as well.
“Dr. Jones, this is Andy Dennison, the translator. Andy, this is Dr. Sunshine Jones, our resident veterinarian.”
“Hi,” Andy said, smiling big. “You know, when I was a kid I had a retriever named Sunshine. I loved that dog.”
Dr. Jones stared at him, her face made of marble.
“Not that I’m comparing you to a dog,” Andy said quickly. “But it’s a small world, both you and my dog having the same, uh, name.”
She didn’t respond. Andy’s smile deflated.
Race, who watched the exchange with barely concealed amusement, cut in to give Andy a hand.
“Mr. Dennison was called in at three this morning. He just met Bub an hour ago. You could say he had the typical reaction.”
“Hey, I’m from Chicago,” Andy said, trying to recover. “I’m not bothered by too much.”
“Is that so?” Dr. Jones said. Her voice lacked the faintest trace of good nature. “Bub’s next feeding is at noon. Maybe you’d like to lend a hand?”
“Sure.”
Dr. Jones nodded, then walked down the Blue Arm to the Octopus.
Andy waited until she’d gone through the door before commenting.
“Very intense lady.”
“She’s been here a week, since Bub woke up, and I haven’t seen her smile once. Does a helluva job though. She’s the one who figured out Bub’s, uh, nutritional requirements.”
“Which are?”
“Remember those sheep you smelled?”
Andy frowned, the banana muffins doing a flip in his stomach.
“Well,” Race said. “Here’s your room.”
Race opened the door to Blue 6. Andy gave it a quick glance over. It was set up like a hotel suite; bed, desk, TV, dresser, washroom. The only thing missing was a view.
“Our water heater is on the fritz, so all we got is lukewarm for the time being. That phone on the nightstand is in-house only. All the rooms in Samhain got ‘em. Hit the pound sign and then the number of the Arm followed by the room number. Blue Arm is number one, Yellow Arm number two—there’s a list next to the phone. I’m in Blue 1, so just hit #11 to get me. Or hit *100 and go live over the house speakers.”
Andy yawned, knowing he wouldn’t remember any of that.
“The only outside line is in the control room,” Race continued, “and for obvious reasons that’s restricted. If you need to get a message to the rest of the world, you have to go through me.”
Andy looked at the bed and felt his will drain away.
“Do I get a wake up call?”
“I believe you’ve already got one in the form of Dr. Jones. I know a thing or two about being macho, but I’m not sure you should witness a feeding just yet, even to impress the cute doctor.”
“It’s that bad?”
“I’ve seen action in two wars, son, and it’s that bad.”
Andy took Race’s outstretched hand and mumbled a thank you, though he wasn’t really sure what he was thankful for. He was three items into his list of necessities when he fell asleep.
• • •
A buzzing woke him up. Andy wasn’t sure where he was, and when he remembered, he couldn’t figure out what the noise meant. It turned out to be his phone, humming like an angry bee.
He lifted the receiver.
“Mr. Dennison? This is Dr. Jones.”
Andy blinked and said good morning. The clock on the dresser said 12:07, so it was technically afternoon, but that didn’t enter into his sleep-addled head.
“Can you meet me at Orange 12, say in fifteen minutes?”
“Sure. Orange 12.”
The doctor hung up. Andy rubbed his eyes and extended the motion into scratching his chin. Stubble. He sat up in bed. Thought about the demon. Felt his heart begin to race.
Pretend it’s just another translation job,
he told himself.
A suitcase that he recognized as his own was sitting next to the bathroom door. When he calmed down, he opened the case to find clothing and sundries, packed neater than he’d ever been able to. His electric razor was in a zippered pocket, and he took that and his toothbrush kit into the bathroom with him.
After a shave and a brush he hopped into and out of a tepid shower, using soap in his hair because he hadn’t bothered to look for shampoo. Five minutes later he was dressed in some khakis and a light blue denim shirt. After a brief indecision he left two buttons open at the neck rather than one, and was then out the door and headed for the Orange Arm.
When he reached the center of the compound—the Octopus as Race had called it—he found two men sitting at the center table. Both were at least thirty years his senior. The one on the left wore round Santa Claus glasses on an equally round face. He had a balding head and a gray goatee, and his large green sweater was tight on his rotund body. The other man was his comic opposite; long and gaunt, cheeks sunken rather than cherubic, scowl lines instead of smile lines. He looked uncomfortable in his jeans, whereas his companion looked at home in his.
Andy recalled Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street.
They were in an intense conversation when Andy entered, and his arrival didn’t warrant an interruption.
“As usual,” the chubby one said in a voice deep and full, “you’re narrowing your concept of Christian hell to church teachings, with Dante, Milton, and Blake thrown in for good measure. But the concept of an Underworld goes back to Mesopotamia almost four thousand years ago, which predates both Christianity and Judaism.”
The thin man sighed as if the world rested on his shoulders. “I’m aware of Mesopotamia, as I am of Egyptian, Zarathrustrian, Grecian and Roman beliefs in Hell.” He had a thin, reedy voice that matched his appearance. “I’m also aware of the complexities of explaining the presence of evil in a divinely created universe. But it seems to make more sense to have an embodiment of evil in the form of Satan than a dualistic God who is both forgiving and wrathful.”
“Fa!” the fat one said, raising up his hands and rolling his eyes. “Enough with Yeoweh’s dark shadow. From the second century BC, my people have believed in a distinct malevolent deity, in this case Mastema, who was created by ha-shem to do His dirty work, namely, punishing sin. It can be read that Mastema, not Adonai, was the one behind the trials of Job. The same Mastema who tempted the prophets Moses and Jesus.”
The thin one winced. “I hate it when you call Jesus a prophet.”
“You must be the holies,” Andy said. It was the first opportunity he’d had to get a word in.
“What makes more sense,” the fat man turned to Andy. Andy guessed correctly that he was Rabbi Shotzen. “The devil as a fallen angel, or the devil as a purposeful creation of God to be an alternative to His light?”
“I’m an atheist,” Andy said.
There was a moment of silence.
“How can you refuse your own eyes?” asked Father Thrist. “You saw Bub, correct?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, he’s unmitigated proof that God must exist. For there to be devils, there must be hell, and if there’s hell, there’s a heaven and a God.”
Andy decided he didn’t want to get drawn into this conversation.
“I saw a thing, that looked like what we call a devil. I can’t draw any more conclusions than that.”
“Another Thomas,” Thrist said to Shotzen. “Here we have, in captivity, one of Satan’s minions, and everyone who sees him doubts. Why not set him free? The world wouldn’t tremble with fear, as predicted. Bub would probably go on the talk show circuit and then become a sponsor for soft drinks.”
The agitated priest turned to Andy again and pointed a finger, a gesture he seemed comfortable making. “Satan’s greatest feat is to convince us he doesn’t exist. He doesn’t want us to believe in him, and that makes it easier for him to spread his evil. Lucifer is the Master of Lies.”
“I disagree, Father,” Shotzen cut in. “God wants us to know the devil exists. It’s his infernal existence that steers us towards the path of truth and light.”
Andy headed for the Orange door, content to leave the philosophical demands of the situation in other hands. The discussion continued without him; in fact, Andy guessed they hadn’t even noticed he’d left.
The Orange Arm looked newer than the rest of the facility, with brighter paint and shinier tile, but the smell was barnyard fresh. Andy wrinkled his nose.
Dr. Jones was waiting for him in front of Orange 12, holding a clipboard that commanded her attention. She didn’t look up at Andy as he approached.
“I’m ready for lunch,” Andy said. He tried on a small grin.
She walked into Orange 12 without replying. Andy followed. The room was large, almost the size of Bub’s habitat. Several empty pens were off to the right, and to the left side was a fenced area where almost two dozen sheep milled about. For all his travels, Andy had never seen a sheep before, and was surprised at how big they were. They were waist high and fat, like a bunch of gray marshmallows on toothpick legs.
“Is that actual grass they’re on?” Andy asked.
“Astroturf. My idea of turning this part of the complex into a biosphere was rejected as too complicated. The turf wears well and is easy to clean.”
“It looks like they’re eating parts of it.”
“Yeah, I told them that would happen. Come on.”
Dr. Jones went to a set of lockers near the pens and removed a leather harness that resembled the reins for a horse. The reins were handed to Andy, and the doctor reached back into the locker and took out a half dozen boxes of Cap’n Crunch cereal. She walked up to the fence and rang a large cowbell hanging from a pole. All of the animals turned to look.
“They eat hay, but they love breakfast cereal. To get them to approach I have to bribe them. The problem is they’re skittish. Every time they come to get the treat, one of them is taken away.”
Dr. Jones began opening boxes and pouring them into the trough inside the fence. The sheep watched for a minute before the first of them approached. He stuck his face in the crunchy treat and began snacking. Dr. Jones patted him on the head.