Jane Millionaire (31 page)

Could she forgive him a second time?

He had to find her, prove to her he regretted his foolishness. It would take more than mere words of love for him to win Jill’s heart back. But how could he convince her he wanted her in his life? That without her, he had nothing but an empty house and a lonely existence?

A very frustrated Jill sank onto her sofa to curl up with a bowl of popcorn and a soda to watch the final episode of JANE MILLIONAIRE. She’d considered skipping the show completely, but couldn’t bring her self to.

Not that Jessie would have let her anyway.

Her sister insisted she had to watch to see how it all ended. Reluctantly, Jill had given in to her sister’s wishes; too tired to argue when Jessie had been full of determination that she couldn’t miss this show.

Today hadn’t gone well. Chief had pulled her into his office and informed her that he had assigned her to a desk for the next month. A month. She wanted to be out in the field where the action was, not stuck inside four walls where the only action she’d see was that of a computer screen.

But he’d argued the force didn’t have the manpower to leave her out in the field with all the intentional ‘crimes’ taking place in hopes Jill would be the arresting officer. Since she hadn’t willingly provided additional fodder, the media were having a field day with the crime wave that had hit San Padres during the past two weeks.

Her choice had been to sit at a desk or go home on leave.

She bit into a kernel of popcorn and chewed the buttery morsel in frustration.

“Things will calm down in a few weeks, and you’ll be able to go back to work,” Jessie, with a bowl of her own, reassured as she plopped onto the other end of the sofa.

“My life will never be the same again.”

“If you really believe that, why don’t you start accepting some of the offers you’re receiving? My gracious, Jilly, you’re the envy of every woman in America right now.”

Jill sighed. “Yeah, I know that’s what he wanted. Courtesy of his ex-wife, Rob has a wall around his heart that he’s not going to let me or any other woman through. Besides he hates lots of press attention, and I’m a darn media magnet. He’d rather walk across hot coals as to take this hellish ride with me.”

And she’d wondered a few times if knowledge of what she’d be going home to had played a role in his pushing her away? He truly shied away from publicity except in regards to his productions. A relationship between them would cause a feeding frenzy among the media.

She’d meant what she said. She didn’t want a man who was ashamed of her, who wasn’t willing to let the world know she was his. Nor did she want a man who could willingly send her away with another man. Rob Lancaster hadn’t been the man for her.

But as soon as the press quit following her, she planned to start a search for her Mr. Right. So what if she had a feeling they’d all fall short in comparison to Rob? She only hoped she could make room in her heart for this Mr. Right she planned to someday find.

“Oh, it’s coming on,” Jessie cooed as the theme music Jill had come to hate filled the room. Something along the lines of Love Is In The Air. Which had to be better than the old episodes of Law and Order she could now quote from memory. She couldn’t bring herself to actually watch Rob’s old films from his acting days, but watching Benjamin Bratt as a character who existed in her law enforcement world provided comfort to her aching heart, made her believe she’d find a man worthy of her love.

Nausea churned the popcorn in her stomach. Uh-oh. Maybe she’d better lay off eating anything else.

For that matter, had she ate anything today? A bagel early this morning, but nothing since. She probably wouldn’t have indulged in the popcorn if Jessie hadn’t had a bowl and soda waiting on the coffee table when she’d finished changing out of her uniform and into a pair of sweats and T-shirt.

A Got Milk t-shirt.

She’d seen the identical-to-Rob’s shirt in a T-shirt shop and had stopped the patrol car to go inside to purchase one in her size. Completely and utterly stupid, and Dan had totally laughed his butt off at her, but wearing it made her somehow feel closer to Rob. Like the old Law and Order episodes did.

Where was he tonight? With some Hollywood socialite working off his abundant testosterone? Or was he alone watching the opening to the show they’d helped create?

She probably didn’t want to know the answer because the thought of him with another woman might drive her to insanity. She chose to ignore that he would move on, would have other women in his life, in his bed. Probably already had.

Did one’s heart ever forget?

Jill watched while her face filled the screen. It was a clip of her right before she’d left the castle.

“You can tell I’ve been crying,” she complained. “I look awful. Why didn’t they fix my make-up?”

“Maybe that’s the look JP was going for when he dragged you in front of the camera,” Jessie mused, causing Jill to glance at her sister.

“JP wanted me to look bedraggled and upset?”

Jessie shrugged. “You told me he and Rob were good friends in addition to being co-producers for the show. Like, maybe, he wanted his pal to see how heartbroken you were.”

“JP was one of the reasons Rob pushed me away.”

Jessie shrugged again. “Whatever.”

Jill’s gaze went back to the screen. A segment on Jeff and the real princess’ “honeymoon” played, ending with Jeff on his knees proposing to the woman he confessed to having fallen in love with when he’d met her in Central America. Isabella accepted, muttering words of love and what was the point of being royalty if she couldn’t make changes to some of her country’s more backward laws. In a segment filmed later, Isabella discussed plans to launch a women’s rights initiative; while Jeff headed up a health program to insure all the children in her country received proper immunizations and well-child care. The princess never looked happier. Neither had the beaming man next to her. Love and pride shined in Jeff’s eyes while he watched Isabella charm the camera.

They sure hadn’t dragged out the suspense of how the honeymoon week had gone. Confused Jill looked at her watch. There was still forty-five minutes of airtime. So what was going to play during the remaining time?

A commercial came on. Maybe she’d just go on to bed and forget watching the rest. What was the point in torturing herself with more memories of Rob?

“You couldn’t look otherwise,” Jill said, earning a smile. Amazing how she saw her sister with a different light. When had Jessie grown up and she’d failed to notice? Funny it had taken five weeks away to realize her sister really could manage her own life--albeit in a way that made Jill cringe.

She walked to the kitchen and poured more soda, silently musing over the portion of the show that had aired so far.

“Jilly, get in here.
Now
,” Jessie yelled.

Jill grabbed the sodas and rushed to the living room. Jessie sat on the sofa edge, her gaze glued to the television. “Look.”

“What’s the rush?” Her breath caught when she noticed the television screen. She and Rob chatted in the studio following her having read the bachelor’s letters. One of the glasses in her hand almost slipped from her trembling fingers.

This wasn’t part of the show. Why were they airing this?

Jessie took the sodas from her and sat them on the coffee table, which was probably a good thing because Jill knew she would have dropped them both when the following clips came on.

Footage she hadn’t even known had been recorded of her and Rob together from before the bachelors arrived. She and Rob laughing, smiling. She’d loved him even then. The evidence was there in the way she gazed at him like he was the sweetest thing since chocolate.

Next a clip of Rob’s face when she’d appeared at the top of the stairs on the night she’d first met the bachelors. Had he really looked at her like that? As if she’d totally taken his breath away? Their dance aired next, close ups of Rob whispering in her ear. Memories ran through her of how his words sent tingles along her spine, how his scent intoxicated her senses.

Her eyes watered at the longing, but resignation on both of their faces when the dance ended. Footage of them in the exercise room quickly followed, then her challenge in the foyer.

Jill sucked air into her shaking body while the screen cut to a car commercial.

“What’s going on?” Jessie asked. “Did you know they were going to show this stuff?”

Jill shook her head, opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. What was going on? JP had to be behind this. Rob would be livid.

“Here, take a drink.” Jessie shoved her soda at Jill.

The cool liquid did little to calm her nerves. Had she bumped her head while at work today and just didn’t remember?

“Oh, it’s coming back on,” Jessie exclaimed when a commercial gave way to Jill and Rob battling it out on the basketball court, her teasing him about playing for his kiss and his insistence she kiss one of the bachelors following
his
win.

“But as this next scene shows, I did kiss Jane. The very next morning.” Rob’s gorgeous face came onto the screen.

“Oh my gosh. He’s in on this. Do you know what that means?” Jessie gushed, jumping up from the sofa and bouncing around like a cheerleader on speed. “Jilly, do you know what this means?”

“Shush.” Jill threw a cushion at her sister and kept her gaze glued to the television set while her and Rob’s early morning run-in played. She relived his first kiss, recalling how his mouth felt on hers, recalling how every nerve cell in her body had been singed by his touch. A deep ache settled in her stomach that had nothing to do with popcorn and everything to do with the man who’d stolen her heart.

More clips followed. Clips she’d forgotten. Clips of him gazing at the computer monitors, watching her with the bachelors. Clips of her watching him. Clips of him rescuing her from the lake, his kissing her temple. Clips of their late night return to the lake.
Who had taped those
? And thank God she hadn’t dragged him onto that dock and had her way with him.

“No, he’s doing this for the ratings. I didn’t fall for one of the bachelors and they were afraid it would hurt ratings. He’s making sure he wins America’s approval. That’s all this is about.”

But even as she said the words, she admitted she wasn’t sure. Rob liked his privacy. This was the last episode. Surely, he’d already far exceeded his rating requirements? From everything she’d seen, JANE MILLIONAIRE had been a smashing success. Based upon the media’s harassment, she’d think they’d far exceeded expectations.

“Ratings?” Jessie looked appalled. “I don’t think so. Did you see how he looked at you when he saw you in your princess gown? Oh my gosh. If Larry had ever looked at me like that I’d still be wearing his ring instead of dating Steve. And that kiss,” Jessie fanned her face. “You two were totally blazing!”

“Maybe.” The show came back on, saving Jill from more of Jessie’s assumptions.

Scenes from the day she’d left the castle aired. Clips of Rob’s face while she faced the bachelors prior to stating her choice. Her comment that she chose no one since she hadn’t fallen in love with any of the bachelors. Rob’s look of relief.

How had she missed the emotions he’d revealed?

Because he had kept them hidden from her. He hadn’t been willing to share his feelings, and she was sure he hadn’t meant for them to ever be known by anyone. JP must have twisted his arm into doing this. Or the network had offered him a deal he hadn’t been able to refuse. Or maybe the ratings really hadn’t been as good as the media attention led one to believe.

Tension filled her while she watched an edited version of her knocking the vase over in the hallway, of her chasing after Rob, and damn, if they hadn’t even caught them on film in the stairwell, although only a brief segment of their conversation was shown. Thank goodness.

She also realized no clips of her going to Rob’s room had been aired. Nor any of the sound effects of the night he’d come to her room. Had that been intentional, or had Rob destroyed that footage long ago?

Panicky energy shot through Jill. She stood and paced across the room during the next commercial break. What did all this mean? What did she want it to mean?

As if she didn’t know. She laughed at herself. She wanted Rob. But how could she ever know that he was sincere in his feelings for her? That he hadn’t done this for ratings?

Jill glared at her and continued to pace. She had to figure out what Rob commentating this show meant. When his handsome face came onto the screen, her long strides paused.