Authors: Rebellious Desire
“I’ll concede nothing,” Bradford snapped out. The conversation was getting completely beyond him. Something she had said earlier pulled at his memory and he was trying to recall what it was. Whatever it was would come to him soon enough, he decided with a yawn. For now all he wanted to do was hold his wife and fall asleep. With that thought in mind, he sought to end her argument. “You’re the one who’ll concede to my strength, my lead. Do you dare suggest it should be the other way around?”
“You’re deliberately being obtuse,” Caroline answered. “You know exactly what I’m asking of you. You’ll either trust me or—”
“Perhaps in time, when you’ve proven yourself to me,” Bradford replied. He yawned again, dismissing
the subject in his mind, and tried to pull Caroline back into his arms.
Caroline jerked away and moved to stand before the bed. She grabbed the quilt and wrapped it around her, shaking with anger. “I’m through proving myself to you. If you had your way I’d be trembling with fear every time a man opened his mouth to speak to me, afraid that you would jump to your nasty conclusions again. When you realize that I’m not a superficial female intent on material gains or a cunning whore out to conquer the male population of London, then maybe our future will be peaceful. Until then, you can damn well sleep by yourself. Let your suspicions keep you warm.”
She walked out of the room. There was satisfaction in slamming the door shut behind her but it was short-lived, and by the time she had climbed into Bradford’s bed, she was trembling with anger again. She fully expected him to drag her back to his side and was surprised when he didn’t.
He opened the door to the bedroom and stood, towering over her, shaking his head. “So be it,” he announced in a voice that chilled her. “This is my bedroom. You have my permission to sleep in your own room, wife. When you realize how foolishly you’re behaving, I’ll be willing to listen to your apology.”
Caroline didn’t answer him. She removed herself from his bed and walked back into her own bedroom. She settled herself in her bed, shivering with cold, and cried herself to sleep.
Her last thought was that Bradford was the most stubborn man alive.
Bradford could hear his wife crying. He started to get out of bed to go to her and then stopped himself. She had brought this on and she would have to be the one to come to him.
He closed his eyes and forced himself to clear his
mind. And just when he was about to drift off to sleep, he remembered what it was that had been bothering him, badgering the back of his mind. She had called him by his given name. When they were making love, she had called him Jered. He frowned, wondering why it was so significant.
C
AROLINE WASN’T SURE JUST HOW SHE GOT THROUGH THE
next two days. Charity’s wedding was almost too painful to bear. Her cousin was so happy, deliriously in love, and Caroline experienced real pangs of jealousy. She hid her feelings and played the docile wife whenever she was forced to stand beside her husband.
She alternated between fits of acute homesickness for Boston and her relatives there, and bouts of melancholy whenever she thought about her situation with Bradford. Caroline felt trapped by her love for him and wished, more than once, that she could stop the pain that came with loving such a rake.
The wedding ceremony was quite lovely and Caroline wept throughout the exchange of vows, much to her husband’s frowns of displeasure. He stuffed a handkerchief into her hands with a loud sigh of irritation that she was certain everyone in the church heard.
While Caroline thought she concealed her misery over having Bradford for a husband, she was irritated that he didn’t so much as try to hide his disgust with her. He scowled like an unhappy schoolboy. Oh, he was pleasant enough at the reception that followed the ceremony, even laughed a time or two, but he was only pleasant to everyone but her. He completely ignored her presence most of the time, except when it was necessary for him to dictate an order.
Rachel and her mother attended both the wedding and the reception. Caroline was surprised by their
appearance and waited until she and Bradford, with Milford sharing their carriage, made their way back to the townhouse before she remarked on it.
“I can’t understand why Rachel attended the wedding,” Caroline began. “She made no secret of the fact that she hates me, and she knew I would be there.”
“They were both invited,” Milford pointed out. “Mother and daughter.”
“But she said such terrible things to me,” Caroline argued, shaking her head.
“Yes, but only you, Bradford, Nigel, and I know that,” Milford returned. “Her mother still has her heart set on nabbing your father.”
“I tried to get her aside to talk to her,” Caroline admitted. “But she was just like a mouse. Every time I got near, she scurried into another corner to get away from me.”
Milford grinned. “She looks like a mouse too.”
Bradford wasn’t amused. “I don’t want you near that woman,” he stated in a harsh voice.
“I only wanted to find out why she dislikes me so. She said that everything was my fault. I think I have a right to know what I did to cause such hate, Bradford. She might have killed me when she pushed me down those stairs at Claymere’s house.”
“What makes you think that she’s the one?” Milford was looking at Bradford when he asked the question, and his friend’s curt shake of his head told him to discontinue the topic. Milford raised an eyebrow in confusion and then changed the subject. “Will you miss Charity when she departs for the Colonies?” It was a ridiculous question but it was all he could think of to distract Caroline.
“What? Oh, well, of course I’ll miss her,” Caroline returned, showing her astonishment over his question. “I’ve been thinking that I would like to visit my family.” She glanced over at Bradford to see how he was taking her announcement but he was staring out
the window, ignoring her again. “Perhaps in the spring I could go for a short while,” she added.
“You aren’t going anywhere,” Bradford interjected. His voice didn’t suggest she argue, and Caroline was too fatigued by the long day to fight with him now.
Milford searched his mind for another, safer topic. The tension inside the carriage was almost visible, making him extremely uncomfortable. “How’s your uncle?” he blurted out. “I understand he’s feeling a little under the weather.”
“Only a cold,” Caroline answered. “Bradford and I visited with him yesterday and he has a bright red nose and teary eyes, but the physician says he’ll be as fit as ever in just a few days. He was very upset over having to miss Charity’s wedding.”
They reached the townhouse then and Caroline immediately went upstairs. Bradford and Milford retreated to the library to talk.
Caroline paced the confines of her bedroom for a good hour before she took to her bed. She hated the mattress, beating down the lumps with her fists to vent some of her frustration. She was miserable over the growing abyss between her husband and herself and was beginning to think it was a problem that couldn’t be solved.
The door to Bradford’s bedroom was open and Caroline stood at the entrance and stared at the big, inviting bed. Was she wrong to demand his love? Was she the stubborn one? Bradford had called her unrealistic. Perhaps he was right, Caroline considered. Perhaps she asked too much from him. “I’ll not take half measure,” she whispered. In her heart she knew that Bradford was wrong in his thinking. She couldn’t allow her longing to be in his arms to sway her resolve.
Caroline prayed for the strength to continue her resolve, shut the door that linked her to her husband, and slowly walked back to her cold, empty bed.
The following morning Bradford stated that it was
time to return to Bradford Hills. Caroline didn’t argue over it, maintaining a distant attitude that reflected her husband’s mood.
Bradford was growing weary of the hostile atmosphere. He had come to appreciate his wife’s dry sense of humor and enjoyed their sparring matches. She was an intelligent woman who understood the political happenings in both the Colonies and England, and he missed their heated debates on the differences between the two nations.
They were quickly settled in their country home. Bradford felt confident that Caroline would become lonely from the forced isolation and seek out his company. He missed her physically, too, and waited for her apology so that they could return to their intimate relationship.
By week’s end, he had to reevaluate his thinking. Caroline didn’t appear to be the least bit lonely, and if he hadn’t known better, he would have considered that the country life was more appealing to her than the social whirl London offered.
Caroline’s father had insisted that she keep the two Arabians and every morning she rode one of them, always with her guards following behind.
Business forced Bradford’s return to London and while he was there, he purchased several expensive pieces of jewelry. His favorite was a necklace of diamonds and rubies. He sent it by special messenger to his wife with the intention of returning to Bradford Hills the following day to receive her humble appreciation.
The necklace was returned by the same messenger late that evening. There wasn’t a note attached, but the exhausted courier stated that the duchess had bid him to take the necklace back to her husband with all possible speed.
Bradford was irritated over her refusal to accept his offering and then considered that she just hadn’t particularly
cared for it. He had had the foresight to obtain several magnificent gems yet to be set in any design, and carried them with him when he made his journey home. His carriage contained an assortment of the newest fabrics as well, additional peace offerings for Caroline. No woman could resist a new gown, and Bradford was convinced that she would crumble under the onslaught of his generosity.
He was mistaken in his theories and was more furious with himself than with his wife’s rejection. She refused to accept any of the presents and actually appeared to be insulted by them. They were peace offerings and she was too damn stubborn to recognize that! Of course, he hadn’t explained his motives, but any woman with a portion of intelligence would understand his meaning.
It was late evening when Bradford confronted his wife in the study. He admitted his confusion over her behavior, and that seemed to anger Caroline all the more. She was dressed in a simple gown of royal blue, with a heavy shawl wrapped over her shoulders for added warmth.
“When will you accept that I’m not like other women?” Caroline asked him. She stood before the roaring fire and warmed her hands, her back to her husband. “I don’t want your expensive jewels.”
“Then the finer things of life don’t appeal to you?” Bradford asked. His voice was deceptively calm. Caroline turned and saw the glint of anger in his eyes.
“There are other possessions far more enticing,” Caroline replied. She hesitated then, trying to form a way to tell him that she would have his love and trust above all else. She knew that as soon as she started on that topic her husband would close his mind to her, and she was desperate to find an avenue into his heart.
“I’ve made a serious error in dealing with you,” Bradford decreed. The arrogance was back in his voice when he continued, “Tomorrow you’ll pack your belongings
and travel to the other side of the estate. There is a house there, the first ever built by a Bradford. You tell me that luxuries mean nothing to you. Well, wife, prove it! Let’s see how long it takes you to admit the truth.”
Caroline nodded, trying to hide her distress. How could they ever resolve their differences if they lived in separate houses? “And will you live there with me?” she asked in a quiet voice.
Bradford saw the alarm in her eyes and almost smiled. He believed that he had finally found a way to make her come to her senses. “No,” he answered. “The men that I hired to see to your protection will go with you and I’ll return to London. When my business is finished there, I’ll return to this house. Unlike you, my dear wife, I admit that I enjoy the comforts my wealth provides.”
“And will you have other women in your bed when you are in London?” Caroline asked in a very mild tone. Her back was to her husband and he couldn’t see her expression.
He was clearly amazed by her question. Since meeting Caroline, he hadn’t considered touching any other woman and the thought now repulsed him. He recognized that he held another weapon to hurt her with, but didn’t have the heart to use it. “No.” He didn’t offer any additional explanation but waited for Caroline to make a comment.
“Thank you.” The simple return pushed him off center again.
“Why?” Bradford asked. “Why does it matter to you?”
Caroline slowly walked over to stand directly in front of her husband. He was leaning against the edge of the desk. “Because I love you, Jered Marcus Benton,” she said, looking into his eyes, her gaze hiding nothing.
“You have a strange way of showing your love,” he
commented. He reached out and cupped the back of her neck and pulled her closer. “I didn’t force you from my bed, Caroline. You left of your own accord.”
Caroline didn’t reply to his remark. She just continued to look up at him until he couldn’t withstand the temptation a second longer. His lips brushed hers, and when she didn’t try to pull away, he kissed her again. And again.
Caroline’s mouth opened under his tender assault and her hands slipped around his waist. She held nothing back, letting him feel her need, her love.
Bradford’s tongue stroked the sweet warmth her mouth offered, kindling the embers of desire with each erotic touch. The kiss changed, became rough with insistence. The shawl fell to the floor when she was abruptly pulled against Bradford’s hips.
She never wanted the kiss to end, and when Bradford tore his mouth from hers and began to tease and torment the side of her neck, Caroline sighed with a mixture of pleasure and building frustration.
“I’m going to have you tonight,” Bradford said in a voice as soft as velvet. He kissed her again, a long, hot, drugging kiss meant to quell any thoughts of resistance, and then lifted her into his arms and carried her up to his bedroom.