Authors: Rosalind James
“Obviously, we knew it was a fake,” her father put in. “He
was hoping we’d answer automatically, that we’d be worried about you. The good
news is, he obviously doesn’t know you’ve left the country.”
“You didn’t tell anyone else where you are, did you?” her mother
asked anxiously. “I know how hard it was to disappear like that. But I’m not
sure you can count on other people’s secrecy.”
“Don’t worry. I didn’t tell anyone. I figured if they don’t
know, they can’t accidentally let it slip.”
“But Mom,” Kate burst out, “this is so hard. I’m stuck over
here, cut out of my own life. Every time I think about it, I’m furious. And I
don’t know what to do with that.”
“It can’t last forever, though, can it?” her mother asked.
“Surely, without any reinforcement, any reaction from you, this obsession has
to end.”
“That’s what I’ve been told. But if he’s still calling you .
. . how am I going to know when it’s safe to come back?”
“You should plan to stay a full year, anyway,” her father
counseled. “I know it seems like a long time right now, sweetheart. But we want
you to be safe. If you need more money to do that, we’ll help. You know you can
count on us.”
“Oh, Dad,” Kate said, swallowing hard to keep from crying.
“I miss you guys so much. It gets so hard to be strong, by myself.” A few
stubborn tears made their way out before she took a deep breath and got a grip
on herself. She saw the distress on her parents’ faces and hated being the
cause of it. Resented everything they’d had to go through, worrying about her.
“Don’t worry,” she went on bracingly. “I have enough money. I’ll
be all right. I’m trying to see it as my long-delayed junior year abroad. It’s
a great place to live, anyway. If I’d come here of my own free will, I would
have loved it, I’m sure.”
“Honey, your dad and I were thinking, what if we came down
there to see you? Surely we could do that without Paul knowing. How would he
know where we went on vacation?”
“Because the neighbors would find out where you were going,”
Kate sighed. “I know it sounds far-fetched. But he scares me so much. If you
don’t hear anything for a few months, though, we could try that. It’d be
something to look forward to. A beach Christmas, maybe. That’d be fun.”
“We aren’t going to do anything that puts you at risk, however
remote,” her father said firmly. “Your safety matters more to us than anything
else. And I think that SOB is capable of anything. I’m so damn angry that I
haven’t been able to protect you from him. I’d like to go over there right now
and put a stop to this.”
“Dad. Whoa. Watch your temper,” Kate cautioned. “It’s not
going to do me any good to have you get arrested. I’ll get through this.”
“You’re being careful now, though, right?” her father insisted.
“With men you meet there?”
“Don’t worry. I’ve learned my lesson. And I’m not exactly
interested in dating. The only men I even see are the players, and Hannah says
I don’t need to worry about them. They’re under too much scrutiny to take that
kind of risk.”
“I don’t think I want you dating a rugby player,” her father
said in alarm.
“Dad. I just told you, I’m not interested in dating,” Kate
answered patiently. “And they’re not that bad,” she surprised herself by adding.
“More civilized than you’d expect.”
She sat for a minute after ending the call, trying to sort
out her tangled emotions. She was furious at Paul. How was it that he was the
offender, yet she was the one deprived of her freedom to live where and how she
wanted, while he suffered no consequences at all?
She ached to see her parents, her friends. Even to be in her
tiny, less-than-fabulous apartment in her scruffy neighborhood. It was home.
And this, however pleasant, wasn’t. At first, it had been such a relief to get
away, to be safe, that she hadn’t cared. But now that she’d been here for a
while, she was aware of her loneliness, her isolation from everything familiar.
She debated calling Hannah. No, this was Drew’s day off, and they’d be spending
it together. She wished she knew more people. Maybe she should join a gym, take
some classes instead of swimming alone all the time.
She’d invite Emma from Public Relations to lunch next week,
she decided. Would make more of an effort in general. If she wanted friends,
she’d have to go out and find them.
With shock, she realized why she hadn’t felt as lonely as
she’d expected in the past weeks. Because of the bet with Koti, she’d had at
least one outing to count on every weekend, and had already started looking
forward to their surfing date. This wasn’t good. She definitely needed to make
some more friends.
“I’m not on the traveling squad?” Koti stared dumbly at
Peter King, head coach of the All Blacks, the following Wednesday. “Why not?”
“Two fellas ahead of you who can play at 13,” the coach
explained. “We’ll call you up if we need you, no worries. You’ll be fit anyway,
just those few weeks off.”
“I’m playing as well as I was last year, though,” Koti
argued. “And I was on the squad every series then. What’s changed?”
“A couple of the other boys have come up since then,” King
said. “And you know the selectors had to choose the players with the best form
against a team like Wales.”
“What’s wrong with my form? You know I came back from
England last season for the chance to play with the ABs. If I’m going to stay
past this year, I need you to tell me what I have to do to be selected.”
King sighed. “You’re a good centre, Koti. You could even be
a great one. But your workrate isn’t where it should be. We’ve got to see you
putting your head down, being consistent, if you want to be on the squad every
time. You don’t tick all the boxes, either. I don’t see you tackling enough, or
doing the ruckwork.”
“That’s not my skill, though,” Koti objected. “Nobody’s
better than me at the offload. You know that. Not many faster, either.”
“True enough, you get it done with the ball in hand. But I
don’t see you putting in the hard yards away from the ball. If you want to play
in this code, and to be selected for every ABs series, you need to work harder,
simple as that. And to make sure you’re more focused on the team than on your
own highlights.”
It was useless to protest any more, Koti realized. Whatever
he thought of the decision, it had been made. He turned and headed blindly to
the locker room. After the game on Saturday, he’d be looking at three long
weeks when the All Blacks were playing Wales. And he wasn’t going to be any
part of it.
He couldn’t even go overseas, have a bit of a holiday. Nurse
his wounds, he admitted. He’d still be here, training with the Blues.
“Just heard, cuz,” Hemi said sympathetically as Koti entered
the locker room. “You can’t help bad luck. I’ll miss you, though,” he added,
slapping the younger player on the shoulder.
Koti shook his head. “Not luck. It’s my form. And I know,
it’s what you’ve tried to tell me. I still don’t agree, though.”
“Have a shower, get out of here,” Hemi suggested. “Take some
time, think it through. You never know when you’ll be called up, anyway. Could
still be playing in this series, for all you know.”
“Nah. Not going to wish someone injured. Hope I’m enough of
a team player for that.”
He threw himself into practice with extra intensity during
the next two days, and played as disciplined a game as he ever had that
Saturday, wanting to show that the rejection hadn’t affected his commitment to
the Blues. Even a win over the Chiefs, though, aided by a try of his own, didn’t
help him shake his bad mood when he woke up on Sunday. It was too much to see the
players selected for the All Black squad, and to contemplate watching the games
himself on television.
He thought about canceling the surfing lesson with Kate. He
wasn’t going to be very good company today, especially after a hard game on
only a few hours’ sleep. But he had to get out of the house and do something.
No sense sitting at home packing a sad. He’d get out on the water, forget about
the team for a while. One thing was certain, he could count on Kate to give him
stick, take his mind off his troubles. He had to admit, he enjoyed sharpening
his wits against hers.
“Morning,” she greeted him as he opened the car door outside
the cafe. “I can’t believe you made me meet you at six-thirty.”
“If you’d let me collect you at your flat, you could’ve had
a bit more sleep,” he responded half-heartedly. “The best surf is in the early
morning. Fewer swimmers too. You don’t have the skill yet to stay out of their
way.”
“And thank you for pointing that out,” she said tartly. Then
looked at him more closely. “Are you too tired from last night? It’s awfully
early to be doing this, after your game. You played so hard.”
“Nah. I needed to get out. Where’s your kit?”
“Still in my car, over here.”
“I haven’t seen this car before, the RAV4. Nice,” she told
him as they transferred her gear.
“Good to have a four-wheel drive for the metal roads, plus
towing and that.” He strapped the longboard to the roof rack with his own.
“Ready to go?”
“Is something wrong?” she asked as they set off. “I mean,
I’m ready to start abusing you, but even I draw the line at torturing wounded
animals. We don’t have to do this, you know.”
He groaned. “Is it that obvious?”
“Well, yes. The sparkle’s a little dull this morning. Come
on, tell me. What’s wrong?”
“Not selected for the All Blacks for this series. The tests
against Wales.” No point in trying to keep it secret. She’d know soon enough.
“Really? But you played so well last night. And you played
all last year, didn’t you? What happened?”
He shrugged. “Selection isn’t automatic, even if you’ve been
on the team in the past. It’s down to the selectors.”
“Who are the selectors? You mean the coach?”
“The head coach is one. But there are three of them. They
choose the team they think is strongest against the sides the ABs will be
playing. And that didn’t include me.”
“Wow. I can see that’s a big deal,” she commiserated. “I’m
sorry to hear that.”
“Could you go back to being snarky now? Think I prefer you
that way. Can’t handle all this sympathy,” he said, trying to make a joke of
it. “I’ll live. A bit of a rough time just now, that’s all.”
“I do know what that’s like,” she agreed. “Want me to
distract you by telling me about my lousy week?”
“Let’s hear it. It’s a bit of a drive to Long Bay anyway.”
“All right. First, I had the charming news that Paul—the guy
who’s been stalking me—had contacted my parents, trying to get my address from
them.”
“What?” he frowned. “They didn’t tell him, did they?”
“No fear of that. But it means he’s still out there trying.
I’d have thought he’d have given up by now. Since, as you keep reminding me,
I’m not exactly Soulmate material.”
“Never said that,” he objected. “Just that you’re snarky.”
He grinned across at her. “Reckon some men like that. Keeps them on their
toes.”
“Well, I’ll have to keep my eyes open for that rare breed.
But meanwhile, it means I’m still cut off from all my friends and family, other
than my parents. Because I can’t trust anybody else to keep my whereabouts a
secret. Nobody would mean to tell him, I’m sure. But he’s pretty clever, and
very plausible. He’d get it out of somebody, if they knew.”
“You mean you came here without telling anyone?” he asked in
amazement. “Other than your parents? And you haven’t talked to anyone from back
home since?”
“Nope.” She shook her head. “That’s one reason I’m so nasty.
Cabin fever. Or friend fever, whatever you get when you’re too isolated.”
“Is this fella really that dangerous? That you have to go
this far to escape him?”
“Yes,” she said soberly. “He really is. But I don’t want to
get into that now. I’m supposed to be entertaining you. And that isn’t
entertaining, trust me. OK, next item. So there I was, all depressed on Sunday
night. No family, no friends.”
“Except me,” he pointed out.
“Of course. You. How could I forget. No friends without an
agenda, I mean. So I thought, I need to make some new friends, right?”
“Right. And?”
“I invited one of the women in the office to have lunch with
me, because I liked her. And I decided I needed to make more of an effort to
get to know people. The only person I know is Hannah. And she’s pretty busy
with her own life, the baby coming so soon and everything. I can’t count on her
to be my social life.”
“So you invited somebody to lunch. Where’s the disaster
here?” he prompted.
“Apparently, although she’s a very nice woman, she’s also a
lesbian. And she thought I was looking to experiment.”
“What?” she protested at his shout of laughter. “It was so
embarrassing, trying to explain. I felt like a total fool. I guess I came on
pretty strong, the way I invited her out, told her I wanted to get to know her
better, and of course she thought it meant something different. I think New
Zealanders move more slowly than Americans. Plus I have no Gaydar,” she added
with a sigh.
“Reckon you’re stuck with me,” he grinned as he pulled into
a carpark in the immense Long Bay Regional Park.
“Great,” she said gloomily. “My only friend.”
“Who’s also a bloody good surfing instructor,” he reminded
her, unstrapping their boards from the Toyota.
“Aren’t we going into the water?” she asked, surprised, when
she emerged from the changing room with her wetsuit on to find him waiting on
the beach, their boards laid out before him.
“Going to practice your technique first.”
“Ummm . . . how do I practice that on the sand?”
“By listening to me, first thing. I’m the instructor,
remember?”
“Right. Sorry. So what do I do?”
“Show me how you lie on the board.” He stretched out on his
own board next to her. “You’re paddling out. Show me how you do that.”