Lauren Weisberger 5-Book Collection: The Devil Wears Prada, Revenge Wears Prada, Everyone Worth Know (212 page)

Her screen lit up with a text message.

Home in 10. You need anything?

Fine, thx. See you then.

She thought about calling someone, anyone, to fill the time but didn't know what she could possibly say.
Oh, hi, Lily. Did you have a good time at the wedding? Flight back okay? Terrific! Yes, I'm just waiting for Max to get home so I can tell him I want a day or two to think things through. A week after our wedding, no less!
She bit her cuticles and stared at the time on her phone, until it rang and she almost jumped out of her seat. It was a blocked number, but she'd long ago given up on screening them.

‘Hello?' The sound of her voice shaking surprised her.

‘Andrea Sachs, please.'

‘This is she. May I ask who's calling?'

‘Oh, hello, Andrea. This is Mr Kevin, from Dr Palmer's office? I'm calling with some test results. Is now a good time?'

Is it ever?
Andy thought.
I can combine a confirmation of some vile genital affliction with my ‘I need some space' request. Now is actually a terrific time.

‘Yes, now is just fine, thank you.'

‘Okay, let's see here … your strep culture came back negative, but I think we were expecting as much. As for the STD panel, I've got good news. Negative for chlamydia, gonorrhea, hepatitis, herpes, HIV, HPV, syphilis, and bacterial vaginosis.'

Andy waited, eager for him to continue, but there was an awkward silence.

‘That is good,' she said, wondering why he was being so weird. ‘Right? So negative for everything?'

Mr Kevin coughed. ‘Well, not exactly negative for
everything
…'

Andy racked her mind, trying to remember if anything was missing from the list.
He said HIV, right? And herpes?
Was there something new, some new cutting-edge disease she hadn't even heard of yet? Was he scared to tell her because she was going to die? She would take Max with her, she swore to herself …

‘Your HCG levels are actually quite high, Andrea. Congratulations! You're pregnant.'

Somewhere in the back of her brain she'd understood where he was going with his announcement, probably right around the word ‘congratulations,' but she felt totally incapable of processing it. It was as though someone had reached out and placed a gigantic black sheet over the lens of her life. Just black. She was conscious and breathing but unable to feel or see or hear anything at all. She had questions, so many questions, but more than anything else, she felt a quiet, stunned disbelief. Pregnant? It couldn't be true. Wasn't true. It must have been a mistake. No matter that a tiny voice inside her head was saying,
You suspected it all along. The nausea, the irregular periods, the aches and heaviness and general misery. You knew, Andy, but you couldn't deal with it.

Stanley's barking brought her back to attention. He only barked when the front door opened, which meant Max was home.

‘Andrea? Are you there?' For a moment, she wasn't sure if Mr Kevin or Max had asked the question.

‘Yes, yes, I'm here,' she said into the phone. ‘Thank you for the information.'

‘Do you have an obstetrician or do you need a referral for one? I can't tell how far along you are without an ultrasound, but judging from your levels, I wouldn't say this is a brand-new pregnancy. It would probably be best to get in for an appointment as soon as possible.'

‘Andy? Are you home?' Max called, the front door slamming behind him. Stanley went into a barking frenzy.

‘Thank you, Mr Kevin. I will handle it,' she lied for what felt like the thousandth time that day.
Not a brand-new pregnancy.
What did that even mean?

‘Hey,' Max whispered, coming up behind her and kissing her neck. ‘Who are you on with?'

She clamped her hand over the microphone. ‘No one.'

‘Andrea? Is there anything else I can help you with?' asked the disembodied voice through her cell phone.

‘Is that why I'm sick?' she asked.

Mr Kevin cleared his throat. ‘That would certainly explain the nausea and the fatigue. Dr Palmer thinks your other
symptoms
– the sore throat, the fever, the muscle aches – are unrelated. A virus, stress, perhaps just being run down. You should feel better shortly.'

‘Yes, I'm sure I'll feel great shortly. Thanks for calling.' She pressed the ‘end' button, took a deep breath, and tried to calm her runaway pulse.

‘Everything okay?' Max asked. He opened the refrigerator, took out a green Gatorade, and swallowed half of it in three seconds.

Andy didn't answer. She wasn't sure her voice still worked.

Max wiped his mouth and offered Andy an apologetic look. ‘Sorry I'm late. I know we need to talk tonight. What's going on? Did you hear from the doctor? Come here. Sit with me.'

Andy allowed him to lead her to the couch, where she mentally calculated the distance from the living room to the hallway powder room in case she vomited. Max began to stroke her hair, and Andy didn't have the energy to make him stop.

‘Talk to me, sweetheart. I know this has been a really long week for you, what with the wedding and being sick and … the whole Katherine thing. Which I need to tell you again, because I don't think I was clear enough this morning. Nothing happened. Nothing. I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I want you to know that I'll do anything – anything on
earth
– to work through this with you and make you feel better.'

Andy tried to speak but couldn't. A baby. Her and Max's child. A Harrison. She wondered if Barbara would disapprove of her grandchild, too.

‘What's happening in that head of yours? What did the doctor say? Are you on antibiotics? Should I go pick up a prescription? Tell me what's going on.'

She didn't know where she mustered the energy, but before she could think anything through, Andy forced herself to smile.
Pregnant. Pregnant. Pregnant.
The word kept reverberating through her mind, and it was all she could do not to scream it. How badly she wanted to tell Max! But no, she needed some time to think.

She reached over to pat Max's hand and said, ‘Let's talk about everything another time, okay? I still don't feel great. I think I'm going to lie down for a while, okay?'

And before he could say another word, she was gone.

In the week since Mr Kevin had called with the news that had changed her life, Andy hadn't told a soul. Not Emily, not Lily, not her mother or sister, and certainly not Max. She needed time to think, not a lot of unsolicited advice and opinions, and certainly not the excited congratulations and happiness that would surely follow. On one hand, it was thrilling. A baby! She'd never been one of those little girls who could spout off every detail of her dream wedding starting at her tenth birthday, from the material of the gown to the shade of the bridal bouquet, but she most definitely had always envisioned her future as a mother. Back then it had been two kids by thirty, a boy and a girl (the boy first, of course). As she got a little older and began to understand that two kids by thirty – hell,
any
kids by thirty – felt way different than she'd thought, Andy altered the equation. In her mid to late twenties, she'd spent quite a bit of time thinking about it, and she had come to the conclusion that two, maybe three kids, at some point between thirty and forty would be perfect. The first two, an older boy and a younger girl, would be two years apart, guaranteeing their closeness and friendship later in life despite their different genders. The third, a girl, would come three years later, long enough to give Andy a bit of a breather but not so long that Andy would be too old or the new baby wouldn't be the best of friends with her big sister and the apple of her big brother's eye.

What she'd failed to envision, of course, was the piece of this puzzle that kept it from being 100 percent fantastic news (never mind the nagging little detail that she'd been pregnant at her own wedding, and anyone with a kindergarten education could do the calculations): namely, she wasn't sure she could trust the father of her child, her baby's grandmother hated her, and she had been thirty seconds away from suggesting a break when she found out she was pregnant. Talk about a game-changer. All the perfectly logical rationalizations that had convinced her she should leave if he'd cheated with Katherine – they weren't bound to each other by anything more than a legal document, they didn't have any children whose lives they would be wrecking – had gone up in smoke with a plastic cup of pee and a lone phone call from a male nurse.

The lights dimmed and Andy's mother emerged from the kitchen carrying a cake, its entire surface alight with candles. They all began to sing.

‘Had to make sure you had all forty-two on there, didn't you, Mom?' Jill asked.

‘Forty-three. One for good luck,' Mrs Sachs said.

The boys and Kyle finished their screeching rendition of happy birthday and then insisted Jill make a wish.

‘I wish my husband would get a vasectomy,' Jill murmured under her breath as she leaned over her cake.

Andy almost choked on her coffee. The sisters dissolved in laughter.

‘What did you say, Mommy?'

‘I wish for health and happiness for my children, my husband, my sister, and my mother,' Jill said, and blew out the candles.

‘Hey, you okay?' Kyle asked, nudging Andy's arm with his elbow. Her brother-in-law offered her a slice of cake on a paper plate, but Jonah grabbed it out of his hand before Andy could reach for it.

‘Jonah! Give that back to your aunt right now. You know the rules – ladies first!'

Jonah glanced up, fork poised over the icing, a desperate look on his face. Andy laughed. ‘Leave him be, I'll get the next one.'

Jonah's fork immediately plunged into the icing. He shoveled a large bite into his mouth and gave Andy a chocolatey thank-you grin.

Kyle handed her another piece, one that didn't get intercepted, and looked right into her eyes. ‘Seriously, Andy, is everything okay? You look a little … tired.'

‘Tired.' The great euphemism for
You look like shit and I don't know why.
Yes, she supposed she was tired. For about a thousand different reasons.

She forced herself to smile. ‘Just a tough time at work, what with the wedding and everything. Not really up for a work trip right now. At least it's Anguilla.'

Kyle looked at her questioningly.

‘Harper Hallow and Mack? They're getting married at the Viceroy in Anguilla this weekend and I'm covering it. Apparently he wanted to have the whole thing on some converted soundstage in Fresno – I think they met on tour there or something? – but she overruled him. Thankfully.'

He said, ‘Quite the job perk. What, literally the entire universe wants to see that wedding, and you're
going
to it?'

‘It's incredible, isn't it? She has the best job on earth,' Jill said, dabbing at something chunky and gross on her shoulder.

Although Andy still got instinctively anxious when anyone talked about her having ‘the best job on earth,' even she had to agree it was pretty spectacular. She loved the feeling of creating something from scratch, of getting to shepherd new ideas from pitches to polished layouts to finished issues. It was tremendously satisfying to brainstorm one day and write the next, and then perhaps spend a few days editing followed by a week of issue planning. The variety kept things exciting and there were always new challenges. But most of all, she loved being her own boss.

When Emily had pitched Andy the idea of starting their own print wedding magazine together, Andy flatly refused. The girls were on their second annual spa weekend away together, a tradition Andy had proposed when she realized she'd scrimped and saved all year to afford a vacation but had no one to go with. Despite Emily's recent and (Andy thought) impulsive marriage to Miles, a reality TV producer five years older who'd just had a huge, surprise hit, Emily agreed to leave her new husband for four days of spa treatments, sun, and sand with Andy. They were sitting together in the warmest of three indoor hot tubs at the Mandarin Oriental's spa on the Mayan Riviera. Naked. They'd just completed a hot-stone massage in the romantic couples' room that overlooked the ocean and retired to the women's relaxation area, where Emily had tossed her towel on a chaise longue and did a little happy dance before sipping her ginger tea, taking a nibble of a dried apricot, and then slowly – ever so slowly – lowering herself into the steaming hot water. It was all Andy could do not to stare enviously at Emily's textbook waist-to-hip ratio, her perfect breasts and toned legs and rounded bum without a teaspoon of cellulite. Andy herself was thin, granted, but her body didn't have any of the ripeness of Emily's – she was all straight lines and angles. She wondered why on earth she was so self-conscious in front of her best friend, but she couldn't help dropping her towel right at the edge of the tub and submerging herself in three seconds flat. As Emily chatted animatedly, Andy focused on keeping her shoulders below the swirling eddies of water, feeling exposed despite being entirely covered.

‘What do you mean “no”? You haven't even heard my idea yet,' Emily whined in the charmingly petulant way that Andy knew meant she wasn't really upset.

‘I don't have to hear your idea. I'm done with print. So is the rest of the world. Believe it or not, I actually
like
my job.' At the time Andy had a sane boss, was writing four days a week for
Happily Ever After,
and had the germ of an idea for a novel percolating. With her clips and flexible hours, she was sure she could start writing enough weekly to get an agent. She was on her way … possibly to a hand-to-mouth existence salary-wise, but still.