Leadership Wisdom From The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari: The 8 Rituals of Visionary Leaders (12 page)

“I was wondering what this one is all about.”

“This is the ritual of human relations and communication competency. Every truly visionary leader has mastered the practice of connecting deeply to his followers. He has refined the art of clarifying his vision for the benefit of his people in a way that fully engages them and stirs them into action. Through their people skills and talents as effective communicators, such leaders touch the hearts of their team and earn long-term loyalty. Simply put,
When you enrich the relationship, you enhance the leadership.”

“Are relationships really that important? I mean I know a ton of leaders who couldn’t care less about connecting with their people. They see their missions very simply: to create profit and value for the shareholder. Everything else is irrelevant.”

“These so-called leaders are not visionary leaders and, believe me, there is a big difference. Visionary leaders are not people who squeeze as much profit out of a company in as short a period as
possible before they bail out and head for an early retirement in the Bahamas, leaving their company in a terrible mess. While short-term profits are important to visionary leaders, they are constantly thinking long-term. They understand that by taking the time to allow their people to develop the fullness of their potential and put strong systems in place, upon which the company can build, massive profits are guaranteed. The leaders you speak of are like sprinters running a marathon. They go for broke in the first mile, but in doing so have nothing left for the rest of the run. Ultimately, they are the biggest losers.

“You see, Peter, anyone can go into a company and drive up profits by relentlessly driving down his or her people. But soon, the people will grow tired and the equipment will break, because neither has been properly cared for. Remember, the chickens always come home to roost. You just can’t avoid the natural laws of life.”

“Point well taken, Julian. So what do I need to do to put Ritual 2 into practice?”

“I’m about to show you,” he replied as he glanced at an elderly couple sitting under a nearby tree, giggling like a couple of school kids as they enjoyed their picnic. “See those two over there? I’ve been observing them for the past few weeks. Sometimes I’ve watched them feed the ducks in that pond over there. Sometimes I’ve watched them ride their bicycles around the park. Sometimes I’ve even overheard their conversations as I relaxed here on the grass,” Julian admitted, with apparent embarrassment. “I’ll tell you one thing for sure. Those two have a wonderful relationship.”

“I wonder how long they’ve been married? They really look like they’re in love.”

“Forty-three years from what I’ve overheard,” replied Julian. “Last week they celebrated their anniversary right here in this
wonderful park. They shared a huge cake with a bunch of friends over there. Quite a lively party they had,” he said, pointing over to a clearing dotted with five picnic tables and bright red flowers.

“Forty-three years. That’s pretty amazing in this day and age.”

“It’s not hard to see how they’ve managed to stay together so long,” Julian said as he took off his sunglasses and wiped the perspiration from his face. “Not surprisingly, they follow the timeless human relations principles that Yogi Raman told me visionary leaders applied to foster the respect of their followers and to build lasting trust. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, a world-class organization is also a high-trust organization. Trust is one of the ageless elements of every peak-performing company. If your people don’t trust you, their managers and their co-workers, there is no way they are going to go the extra mile to give you their best efforts. Without trust, there is no commitment. And without commitment, there’s no company.”

“So what kinds of things have you observed this couple doing?” I asked with keen interest.

“Four things in particular, Peter: promise-keeping, aggressive listening, being consistently compassionate and, finally, and perhaps most importantly, truth-telling.”

“Those are the secrets to their incredible relationship?”

“Yogi Raman taught me that those are the secrets to
every
great relationship. He told me that anyone who desires to be a visionary leader, one who inspires his or her people to achieve extraordinary things, must make these four practices an integral part of his or her leadership style. They are the cornerstones of effective human relations. They will help you perform Ritual 2 on a daily basis.”

“They seem so simple. Can they really make the impact on my team that you are suggesting?”

“That’s the problem with many of the enduring leadership truths. They appear to be so simple and so obvious that everyone puts off applying them. They are not trendy, so people shove them aside in favor of strategies that are more flashy and sensational. Let me ask you, Peter, are you doing these four things every day?”

“Uh, no.”

“Let’s deal with the first one at least. Do you keep the majority of the promises you make?”

I immediately knew the answer to this question. I would often break promises I had made. I would tell my employees I was always available to meet with them, but, when someone actually had a problem that he or she wished to discuss with me, I found convenient ways to get out of the meeting. Other times, I’d tell a key supervisor that she deserved to have the increased responsibilities she’d been asking for. But then I’d neglect to follow through and ensure she got what she wanted. I was a master of broken promises.

“Every promise you break, no matter how small and seemingly inconsequential, steadily chips away at your character,” Julian said to break the silence. “Each time you don’t return a phone call when you said you would or miss a meeting you promised to attend, you erode trust. Each time you don’t honor a commitment, you chip away at the bonds between you and the people you have the privilege to lead. As Yogi Raman used to say,
‘Every time you avoid doing right, you fuel the habit of doing wrong.’ ”

“And those elderly lovebirds keep their promises to each other?” I wondered aloud.

“They sure do. When the husband says he’ll meet his wife at noon for lunch over at that hot-dog stand, you can bet he’ll be right on time. When the wife says that she’d like to take their bicycles out for a spin on a particular day, sure enough, their van pulls up into the parking lot and the husband wheels out the bikes. You see, Peter, when people keep their promises, they breed great loyalty. The wife knows she can count on her husband and he knows he can count on her. And this breeds consistency, an important attribute of high-quality human relations. The husband and wife know what to expect of each other. They can rely upon each other. And that, in turn, breeds trust. Never get behind on your promises. I know you’ll be delighted with the results.”

“You know, Julian, you’re the first person to show me the connection between promise-keeping and human relations. I know what you are saying is true. For me to really be the leader I’ve now committed myself to being, I must keep the promises I make to others and be a person they can truly count on. I need to earn the trust of my people and gain their loyalty. From today onward, I will be a man of my word. I’ll do what I say I will do. I promise.”

Julian grinned. “I’ll hold you to that one, my friend.”

The sun was still blazing as he stood up and started walking. It was remarkable how agile Julian was despite his advancing years. His youthful face carried a smile, as he strode around the park, continuing his discourse on Ritual 2 and the power of leading from the heart and enriching human relationships.

“The second discipline you must master to make Ritual 2 a part of your leadership style is aggressive listening.
Visionary leaders capture the hearts of their people by deeply listening to them.
Most leaders believe that to lead effectively, they need to do most of the talking. They have been brainwashed into believing
that leaders speak and followers listen. Visionary leaders know that another of the human hungers is the hunger to feel understood. Everyone has a deep need to have a voice and to have that voice considered. So visionary leaders become excellent listeners. The irony is that in doing so, they become known as superb communicators.”

“Let me get this right, Julian. Are you actually telling me that by listening more effectively, I’ll be able to communicate my messages more effectively? I mean, how could that be possible?” I asked.

“You want your people to trust you, right?” “Right.”

“You want your people to be loyal to you and GlobalView, right?” “Right.”

“Then remember this: listening to what others have to say is a mark of respect. It shows you value your people and believe in them. What I’m really saying is that you must show empathy to them. You must identify with their perspectives. You must
invest yourself
in the person communicating with you. You need to truly get behind their eyeballs and discover what they are thinking. Only by doing so will you understand them and will they feel understood. And the person who feels understood is the person who listens when it’s your turn to speak. Remember, Peter, one of the greatest gifts you can ever give anyone is giving them
100
percent of your attention.
Listening truly is the highest compliment.”

“I’ve discovered that I’m not a great listener,” I interrupted. “The more I think about it, the more I realize my poor listening habits must really turn off the people I work with. By not paying
attention to what they say and feel, I’m really telling them that I don’t care, that what they say is not really important to me. It now seems so obvious. And I’ll bet that’s one of the root causes of our low morale and low-trust environment. I guess I just never thought that excellent listening skills were that big a deal.”

“They are,” Julian replied swiftly. “Let’s see how poor they are. Let’s do a quick audit.”

“Must we?”

“Like I said before, Peter, awareness precedes change. Before you can improve your leadership skills, you must know precisely which skills need to be improved.
An unknown weakness can never be transformed into a strength.
So let me ask you, do you frequently interrupt others?”

“Guilty.”

“Do you finish other people’s sentences for them?” “Once in a while,” I lied.

“Are you rehearsing your response while the other person is speaking?”

“Maybe,” I said defensively.

“Well, then, we both know you need to do some serious work in the listening department. If you truly want to master Ritual 2 and capture people’s hearts, you must stop listening with the intent to respond. Instead,
listen with the intent to understand.”

“Wow, that’s a powerful way of expressing it, Julian. But let me ask you, if effective listening is such an important leadership discipline, why do so few of us do it?”

“Great question. The first reason is that human beings are visual creatures. Eighty-three percent of our sensory input comes through our eyes so we often neglect much of what we hear. Here’s an example. You’re invited to a cocktail party. You stroll in and are
immediately introduced to someone. You begin chatting with that person and, after a few minutes, you realize you have forgotten something.”

“To get a drink?” I quipped playfully.

“No, the person’s name.”

“Happens to me all the time.”

“And not just to you. More than 90 percent of businesspeople forget the name of the person they’ve been introduced to eight seconds after they’ve heard it. The reason is that as soon as we meet someone new, our brains start processing all the visual and tactile information such as height, weight, gender, strength of handshake and facial expression. In the process, the name escapes our attention.

“So we need to start paying more attention to what we hear,” Julian continued. “The second reason most leaders are not excellent listeners is that human beings possess the ability to listen at a rate of about 500 words per minute, yet we speak at the much slower rate of 100 to 125 words per minute. With all that space left to fill, our minds tend to wander.”

“Interesting. To be honest, I find my mind constantly drifts off when I should be listening to others. I’ll be in a meeting and rather than listening to the speaker, my mind will rifle through all the urgent things that need to be done. Even when I’m talking to someone one on one, I start to daydream. Any ideas about how I can begin to focus on listening to and understanding the person speaking?”

“Excellent listening is a habit that takes a little time and practice. But believe me, it is worth the investment. I heard recently that listening can even improve your health by reducing your blood pressure, moderating your heartbeat and making you feel
calmer. Having said that, the goal is to become ‘an aggressive listener,’ to use the term that Yogi Raman coined. I know it sounds like a contradiction in terms, but it’s not.

“Get excited about being a great listener, get passionate about understanding your people. As to how you do this, try these simple ideas. First, cultivate the skill of asking superb, open-ended questions of your employees and then really listen to the responses. One leader at a high-performing company came up with a simple yet effective idea to make the process even better. He recruited employees from throughout the organization and asked them for their detailed, practical suggestions about how to improve the company. This initiative had two immediate benefits. The first was that the employees felt they were being listened to, which further enhanced morale and environmental trust. The second benefit was that management received free advice about how to streamline and enhance the operation from the people who best knew its weaknesses rather than from an expensive outside consultant. Management then took the best suggestions and scientifically tested them against solid performance measures such as sales revenue, customer service complaints and quality standards to see which ones actually worked. By listening to its people, that company became a market leader.”

“Okay, I’m with you on this one,” I replied. “Can you tell me more about these Open-ended’ questions you mentioned?”