Learning to Live (31 page)

After ten minutes and still no sign of Tru, I start to get a horrible
feeling in my gut. I feel anxious like something is wrong, but I don’t
want to bust up in there and look like a maniac. Besides that, I can’t
get in without the key card.
I wait a few more minutes and there’s still no sign of her at first,
but finally my phone lights up with her name. “Hey.”
“Hey, baby, I don’t think I can make it tonight.” Her voice seems
different and the feeling of dread rises with every second.
“Why? Are you okay?” I know something isn’t right. She was in
the best mood before she went up, and now she’s sounds nervous.
“Y…eah, I’m okay. I just don’t feel well and I just want to stay in
and get some sleep.”
“That’s fine. I’ll just come up.” I need to see her and know she
won’t mind me hanging in her room or staying the night.
“No!”
Now I know something is definitely wrong, and I text Jazz
for her key while I try and keep Tru on the phone. “No, it’s fine. I got
my period and I just want to be alone. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
I don’t want to let her go, but I need to get the key from Jazz. I
also don’t need her knowing I’m headed up there. “Okay, Tru. Just get
some sleep and I’ll see you first thing in the morning.
I love you.”
The phone goes dead, and I start the Jeep and race to the frat
house where my .45 caliber Lama is and also Jazz. I don’t know why
she changed her mind about going out to eat, but I’m glad.
I race up the steps and holler for Jazz. She’s lying on the couch
and I see Mason on the opposite one. Both stand when they hear the
urgency in my voice. “Call David and the cops. Tru’s in trouble.” I run
up the stairs and grab my gun. I check and see it’s loaded and tuck it
into my jeans. Running down the stairs and toward the door, I notice
both are following me, but Mason’s on the phone.
“Jax? What’s going on?” Jazz grabs my arm and I see fear in her
eyes when I look at her.
“Yeah, man? Why do you think Tru’s in trouble?” Mason hangs
up his phone and I assume it was David he was talking to.
I tell them what I know as they follow me to my Jeep. I see Jazz
go to her car but holler to stop her. “Jazz, stay here with Mason.” I
know my tone is harsh, but I can’t help it. I’m desperate to reach Tru.
Now!
“Here.” She slams her car door closed and runs toward me. She
hands me her key card to get into the dorm, and I’m glad she
remembered. I was about to rush off with no way to get in the
building.
All I can do is nod my head, get in my Jeep, and race back to the
dorm. I practically jump out of the Jeep before it stops completely, and
I run toward the door. I decide to take the stairs instead of waiting for
slow ass elevator. Not knowing what Tru is going through is driving
me insane, so standing still isn’t an option.
As I approach her door, I notice a few girls standing outside with
concerned looks on their faces staring at the door. I put my finger to
my lips and tell them to be quiet as I go through Jazz’s door and take
out my gun.
“You stupid, bitch!”
I hear a male voice yell, then the sound of
flesh hitting flesh. My anger reaches new heights, and I have to take a
deep breath and try to calm down. I don’t know what the situation
inside is or if the bastard is armed.
I hear Tru start to struggle as I turn the knob of the bathroom door.
Relief washes through me when I see the door isn’t locked. Peeking
inside, I see a guy wearing a black hoodie straddling Tru’s flailing
body. He takes out a gun and pistol whips Tru, which causes her to
instantly stop struggling, and I see her hand falls limp. It takes all I
have not to rush over and beat the shit out of this guy as he starts to
unbuckle his pants. My steps are measured but stealth.
“That’s right, Trudy. Lie there and take it like you’re used to.”
He’s practically laughing while he pants like a dog, and my stomach
knots up with revulsion. I know this must be the fucker that raped her
in the past, and I can’t wait to give him what’s coming.
I hold the gun toward the back of his head and cock it. He doesn’t
notice because his mind is on his prize.
“Hey, Tony.”
The anger and
hatred I’m feeling is visible in my voice, but my hand is steady on my
gun. I’ve always hit my mark at target practice, and I know for a fact I
won’t miss this one.
He goes dead still and reaches for his gun that’s lying beside Tru’s
lifeless body. I shove my gun harder into the back of his skull. “I
wouldn’t do that if I were you, asshole.” As much as I want to glance
at her to see if she’s breathing, I don’t because I don’t need any
distractions right now. “Now put your hands where I can see them.”
After he does what he’s told, I grab his shoulder and yank him back so
hard I hear the impact when he lands on the ground. I tuck my gun in
my pants and glance at the asshole lying on the floor. “Now get up and
fight someone that’s not so defenseless, you sonofabitch.”
“That bitch owes me and she’s getting what she deserves.” He
slowly stands up and I see it’s the asshole that asked me for a light
outside the dorm a few weeks ago. “So you recognize me then, huh?
Yeah I’ve been watching my investment for months now, making sure
she’s the same sweet fuck she was then.” He licks his dried lips and
smiles, showing off his crooked, yellow and black teeth. “You know
that though, don’t you? Since you’ve been fucking her for weeks
now.”
I take a step forward and get in his face. “She’s not a
fucking
investment,
you piece of shit. She’s the woman I love.” I punch him
and he falls against the wall. “How does it feel being knocked
around?” I go to hit him again but he picks himself up and reaches in
his boot.
He charges at me with a knife, but I side step his advance. “Not as
good as fucking her,” he says as he climbs behind Tru and holds the
knife to her neck. “Now back the fuck off or I’ll have to do something
I
really
don’t want.” He lifts her more securely in his arms and her
head rolls to the side. “You know she loved it back then. Fucking me.
Having
my
dick inside her.” He licks her neck as he watches me with
evil, black eyes, and I know this guy’s crazy.
His words make me forget about being cautious, and I’m about to
charge him when I see the red dot on the middle of his forehead. I look
toward the bathroom door and see an officer slowly walk in with his
pistol aimed at Tony.
“Put down your weapon and let the girl go.” He’s a middle aged
black man who looks like he means business.
I glance toward Tony and see his smile vanish. He starts shaking
his head. “Why? I’m dead no matter what the fuck I do. If you kill me
here or if Nicholas kills me in Atlanta.” He just presses the knife
harder into her skin and smiles. “Might as well take her with m…” He
doesn’t finish because his body is thrown back and blood spatters the
wall behind him.
I watch as the knife falls from his limp fingers, and I run toward
Tru and lift her in my arms. “Baby? Wake up.” I beg for her to open
her green eyes when I feel someone shake my shoulder. I ignore it and
stare at her swollen cheek and kiss her busted lips. “Please, baby.” She
still lies there with no movement.
“Sir, you need to let the medics tend to her.” I glance at the officer
that just shot Tony. My feelings are all over the charts at the moment,
but I know he’s right. I nod my head and feel Tru being lifted from my
arms. As I follow Tru’s limp body, I notice Jazz standing in the
hallway crying.
She runs to me and throws herself in my arms. “She’ll be okay,
Jax. She will.”
I know Tru’s strong because of all the shit life has thrown at her
and pray she’ll get through this. I can’t answer Jazz right now, so I just
nod my head and continue on.
We follow the gurney with my future lying lifeless all the way to
the ambulance. Then, after arguing with the medics, I’m finally able to
ride, holding her hand to the hospital. I pray to whoever’s listening that
she’ll wake up and be okay.

It’s Thanksgiving day and I’m spending it on the couch at Jax’s
parents while everyone fusses over me. Jazz and his mom are in the
kitchen finishing up the food while McKenzie and Grace play dolls
and the guys watch football.
Grace is Mason’s little sister, and since his mom is working a
double at her job, the Colemans insisted they spend the holiday here.
You can tell they are related because they have the same facial features
and dark hair. Grace of course is angelic and dainty though. She’s nine
but she acts like she’s younger because she has a mild case of autism.
Mason’s amazing with her when she has a regular tantrum from
sensory overload. He’ll just hold her and rock back and forth until it’s
over. I can relate because I feel like having one myself with everyone
constantly asking if I need anything.
I’m lying with my feet in Jax’s lap and a sleeping Cohen beside
me. I start to feel overwhelmed with the attention and decide I need a
minute by myself. I try to go to the bathroom, but Jax doesn’t want me
out of his sight and tries to follow.
“
Jax,
I’m fine. I just need to go to the ladies’ room. I’ll be right
back.” I give him a kiss on the cheek to soften the exasperation in my
voice and start to carefully stand up so I won’t wake Cohen.
He stands up in a huff. “I don’t want you to get dizzy and fall. I’ll
carry you.” He bends down and scoops me up. “Doctors orders.” He
showcases his dimple and kisses the bandage on my right temple
before he starts toward the bathroom.
“Jax, you don’t have to. I am capable of walking the fifty feet to
the bathroom.” Just being this close to him calms my frustration, so I
rest my head on his shoulder and sigh. “Actually, can you take me to
sit on the porch?”
He looks at me like I’ve lost my mind, and I can’t help but smile
at him. “You do realize it’s freezing, right?”
“Then grab me a blanket and a cup of hot chocolate. I just need
some air.” He kisses my bandage again and does as I ask.
After I’m situated on the cushion patio chair facing the ocean, I
take a deep breath and smile. It’s just as beautiful in the fall as it is in
the summer. The only difference is the chill in the air and less people
on the beach. I see people walking around but none are crazy enough
to get in the water. Well, I take that back. David and Jax are when they
go surfing, but at least they have on wetsuits.
I hear the chair squeak beside me and look over to see Jax holding
my hot chocolate. I take it from his hand and return his smile. Then I
lay my head back and watch the waves as they crash on the white
sand.
“Was it too loud inside? I can tell Mason and Jazz to take the kids
into a different room.”
I take a minute to answer. “Yes and No.” I shrug my shoulders and
take another sip from my cup. “I don’t have a headache, but I was kind
of overwhelmed with so many people around. I’m not used to
holidays, and I’m definitely not used to all the family commotion.” I
hope he doesn’t think I don’t like it because I do. I’m just trying to
adjust. “If I could help in the kitchen with the other women, I think I
would be okay.” I glance in his direction to see his reaction.
I see a serious expression on his face as he comes and sits by my
feet. He grabs my hand and says something that catches me completely
off guard. “Tru, will you move in with me?” He holds up his finger
before I can say anything. “Look, I quit the fraternity and I want us to
get an apartment together by campus. I also want Jazz to move in with
us, but I wanted to talk with you first. I just hate being away from you.
Not knowing if you’re okay. I want and need you to be safe.” He rubs
his hand down his face before he continues. “What happened to you in
your past and last week will
never
happen again.” He looks at me
straight in my eyes, and it reminds me of that first day we met.
His soul is talking to mine, and I feel the warmth of his stare heat
my skin. “I
need
to know you’re by my side every night. Those three
days you were in the hospital and wouldn’t wake up made me realize
how much I need you to live. If something would have happened to
you...” he takes a trembling breath “...I wouldn’t be strong enough to
make it without you. I love you so damn much, Tru, and I know this
might be fast for you, but you’re my forever.”
The words of how he needs me are exactly how I feel about him. I
need him by my side as much as I need my next breath. He’s not
holding me back but pushing forward in life. I feel my breath catch in
my throat and burn because of the tears that start to fill my eyes. Tears
of joy that this wonderful man has made me realize that I can do
anything in life and I’m good enough.
“Okay,” I whisper and smile. I wipe my tears and say it louder
because I don’t think he heard me the first time.
“Okay?” he asks and jumps up to a standing position, pulling me
with him and lifting me into his arms. “I love you, Tru.” He kisses me
and the flutters have returned, but now I don’t think of them as stupid.
They’re wonderful and just something that Jax causes to happen when
he’s near.
I kiss him back and wrap my arms around his neck. I feel the
flutter melt from the heat that’s starting to build, and I can’t help the
moan of pleasure I let out as he sucks my bottom lip into his mouth.
“Dinner
’
s ready, kids!”
I hear his mom call out, and I’m brought
back to the real world that includes a house full of Jax’s family. I pull
away and see Clara at the window smiling, and she winks at us before
she walks away. I bury my face in his neck because I’m mortified.
“How embarrassing.”
“What is?” he asks, and I can tell he’s laughing.
“Your mom seeing us kissing like that.” I shove away and see that
my cup of hot chocolate is tipped over. “Oh no. I spilled my drink.”
He picks me up from behind and I squeal. “Don’t worry about it.
Besides, Mom said for you to call her
Mom
.” He kisses my nose and
walks us toward the commotion in the dining room.
I know Clara wants me to call Jeremiah and her Mom and Dad. I
want to but it’s another thing in life I need to work my way through.
I’m placed on my feet then sit in my chair beside Jax that he has
pulled out for me. The food smells wonderful, and I’m glad it’s loud in
here because my stomach has started to growl.
I notice the kids are at a different table except Grace who’s sitting
beside Mason. He’s telling her something in her ear, and she’s smiling
while she rocks back and forth. Jazz is beside him and David, Jax, and
I are on the opposite side of the table. Of course Jax’s parents are on
each end of the table.
After grace is said everyone is asked to say something they are
grateful for, and I listen intently. This is all so new to me, and I love it
even though it’s overwhelming.
Clara is thankful for her family’s health, Jeremiah is thankful for
not being on call this year, David is thankful for the food, and Mason
is thankful for new friends. I see him look toward a tired looking Jazz
when he says this and smiles shyly.
Jax is next and says he’s thankful for meeting me while he holds
my hand under the table. Everyone’s looking at me, so I clear my
throat and take a deep breath. “I’m thankful for being alive and for the
circumstances that led me here. Good or bad, they made me who I am
and without them I wouldn’t be here with you.” I look at Jax and
squeeze his hand. Everyone smiles my way and turns toward Jazz. I
glance at my friend, and I can tell she’s stressed over something.
She takes a breath and looks around the table while tearing up her
napkin. “Well, I guess it’s my turn.” I can tell she’s stalling, so I smile
at her for encouragement. “I’m also thankful for Tru and a wonderful
family, which will have a new member in June...because I’m pregnant.
Now let’s eat.” She digs into her plate while everyone just stares in
shock.