Letters and Papers From Prison (15 page)

Your grateful Dietrich

Special greetings to Christel. I’m always particularly sorry for her on the air-raid nights, and for the children.

From Karl-Friedrich Bonhoeffer
[Friedrichsbrunn
²¹
]

30 August 1943

Dear Dietrich,

As you see, at the moment I’m in Friedrichsbrunn. Grete is up here with the children and Suse is also here with hers, and we are now seeing whether we can equip the house for the winter. We have to get a sufficient quantity of coal, wood and petrol, and that is not easy. One runs from one office to another and fights. In addition, the question of school is still completely obscure and there is no satisfactory solution for the two older children. So it is still an open question whether we shall stay up here. In any case, however, it’s certainly a good thing to take as many precautions as possible and to make it possible to live here; we always have to
count on the possibility that one of our large family will be forced to live here.

You went through a heavy attack a week ago; we heard it from the distance in Leipzig. At any rate, we believe that what we heard at night was Berlin. We were, of course, thinking especially of you. By the time you get this letter you may have been visited by more attacks. If only you could be let out at last…

Do you have time and peace of mind in your cell to do some: work on your own account, or is the time completely lost for you as far as academic work is concerned? Can I get you books from the university library? So far I’ve kept avoiding this question, as I thought that by the time I had an answer you would be out again, Even this disappointment does not prevent me from hoping the: same thing again. When I can get a few quiet minutes from the: tumult of children I’ve been studying a little book on the structure and function of the brain. I read recently that the offspring of wild animals born in the zoo have a smaller brain that their contemporaries born wild in natural surroundings. An effect of imprisonment which will perhaps interest you - excuse the feeble joke. At any rate, one does not notice this aspect in your letters. They are always a great delight to us. They’re always sent on to me by the parents or Maria. Something must be due again in the next few days.

Much love from us all. Get as much good out of this time as you can.

Your Karl-Friedrich

From his parents

Charlottenburg, 30 August 1943

My dear Dietrich,

Your last letter was dated 7 August. How can that be possible? It must be something to do with the moving of the War Court to Torgau. But it’s very distressing. And I expect that the same thing will have happened with our letters, and you will have been without news. We will now apply for permission to visit and hope that it comes soon. I keep reading your last letter through and am glad
that you share our confidence that this time which is so difficult for you and us parents will soon come to an end. I’m glad too that you keep your head and your spirits high. But the summer is almost over. Do you think, though, that a couple of fine autumn days up there in Friedrichsbrunn are in store for us? Of course we’re moving all sorts of things in the house and we often miss a strong hand. Things don’t look very nice here any more…

God bless you. We keep entrusting you to him.

Your Mother

31 August 1943

Dear Dietrich,

I just want to add a word to mother’s letter. She has already told you that here, too, the day passes with moving things and putting them away to a greater degree than is good for peaceful work and inner rest. It has become a perpetual state of moving things round which is particularly unpleasant because one really cannot see how long it will last. Once it gets to the stage that one can say of oneself
omnia mecum porto,
it will become much simpler. I’ve taken up my sessions again, but they are by no means over-full. Those outside are afraid of the journey into unsafe Berlin and those who live here have ‘no time for nerves’, as old Heim used to say, in their concern for their possessions. The thick end will come later, when people have time to think about their bodies once more.

We’ve heard nothing of you for a long time. That is probably because of the competition of the letters to Maria. I hope all is well again with your health. Maria has told us of her visit out there to you. She’s a brave person. I’m glad that she gets on well with mother and that they are fond of each other. I hope that our patience will not be tried too much longer. And I hope that we can talk to you soon.

Affectionately, your Father

To his parents

[Tegel] 31 August 1943
²²

Dear parents,

As you will already have heard two days after my previous letter, through Maria, who to my great surprise was allowed to pay me a visit, I am in good health once again. Aspirin for fever and charcoal for the afflictions that go with it are my sovereign remedies, and with the help of your great thermos flasks I was mobile again soon afterwards. I didn’t even need to deny myself the glorious liver sausage. Many thanks for the trouble you took. I’ve now even been prescribed white bread, so please, mother, don’t deny yourself any for my sake.

Maria’s visit here was marvellous, and I was so pleased that she had principally come on your account. I’m dreadfully sorry that Renate had bomb damage in her new house, and it’s frightful for Ursel too, after all the trouble she had getting it ready. Can I suggest to Renate that she tries to buy two pewter plates and two pewter mugs at my expense; sometimes you can find this sort of thing at the place where we got her the pewter tureen for her wedding. It would please me very much if she could do this; instead, she won’t get anything for her birthday. I really would like her to do this.

Unfortunately I haven’t had any bright ideas at all about Christoph’s birthday; I would very much like to give him something nice. Would
You and the Weather
interest him? It’s among my books. Perhaps, too, it would be possible to find him something else in Plahn’s bookshop?
²³
Could you call there some time? They have always served me very well. At any rate, give him my greetings; I hope that next time we shall be able to celebrate a satisfactory birthday together. This time of trial is really very hard for the children. But he’s already astonishingly sensible and knows the sort of attitude he should have towards his parents. Meanwhile you will have had the birthday at the Schleichers’; of course you were very much in my thoughts.

For the last few days I’ve again been able to work well and write a good deal. When I find myself back in the cell after a few hours of complete absorption in my work, it takes me a moment
or two to get my bearings again. The fact of my being here is hard to credit even now, however much I get used to the external conditions. I find it quite interesting to watch this gradual process of accustoming and adapting myself. A week ago I was given a knife and fork for my meals – a new provision - and they seemed almost unnecessary, as it had become so much a matter of course for me to use a spoon for spreading my bread and so on. On the other hand, I think there are some things that are so irrational, e.g. the actual state of being in prison, that it is impossible, or at least very difficult, to get used to them. That kind of thing needs a conscious effort if it is to be accepted. I expect there are psychological works on the subject.

Delbrück’s
World History
is very good reading, only it seems to me to be more a history of Germany. I’ve finished
The Microbe Hunters,
and enjoyed it very much. I’ve also been reading some more of Storm, though without being very much impressed by it on the whole. I hope you will bring me some more of Fontane or Stifter. It’s a nuisance that the letters now always take so long, usually 10-12 days. As we are only 10 kilometres apart, that seems rather generous. Nevertheless, it’s always the greatest joy to get a letter. I’ve now been told that as Dr Roeder is evidently not in Berlin I am to send my letters to Maria via your address. So she must go on having patience for a little longer. I’m so sorry for her. But I hope that I shall not have to write too many more letters from here. I think that five months’ uncertainty and waiting are enough, and for you too. The summer is nearly over. But there will still be fine days in September and October. Much love to all the family. I long so much to see them all again. Above all, all of you keep well until then.

With all my heart,

your grateful Dietrich

From his mother

Charlottenburg, 3 September 1943

Dear Dietrich,

Yesterday we got your letter of 24 August, in which you wrote of the attack the previous night. Those are impressions that you will not forget all your life. You owe them to being there in Tegel, as in our air-raid shelter you certainly would not have seen that terrifyingly beautiful scene in the air from your open window up there. How much I understand your incomprehension about your situation at such moments, when you have to look on ineffectually and cannot help anyone, in the best years of your manhood…Meanwhile there has been another heavy attack, the day before yesterday; by chance we were spending the night at Christel’s, in Sakrow, and even from there we were able to have quite a different view of it from that at home. We saw that our neighbourhood was in great danger round the Heerstrasse, but we were really quite composed in the face of what couldn’t be altered. We were only heavy-hearted about the Schleichers near us. When we went home the next morning, we saw many fine houses destroyed in the Heerstrasse; the station was burning and there were some fire bombs in Lötzenerallee. There was blast damage in Soldauer, Kurländer and Marienburgerstrasse, windows and roofs broken in two. We only lost a kitchen window and there was some damage to the ceiling in the baggage room next to your room. It has been worse in Charlottenburg and Moabit, and I expect they’re what we saw burning. Unfortunately there’s been the same damage at Susi’s as before, if not worse, with damage to the windows and doors that was caused by a high explosive bomb which came down on the Sehring’s house. We were there the whole morning helping to move, so that one could at least get in and out. Then we packed up some more things and took them with us in an estate car, as this neighbourhood is almost always getting it. I expect that Susi will come to Berlin this week if Grete is up there again with the children. – Nothing has happened with Klaus…

God bless you. Father joins me in sending love.

Your Mother

Front Karl
–
Friedrich Bonhoeffer

[Leipzig] 3 September 1943

Dear Dietrich,

You’ve been shut up now for six months. I never believed it would last so long. I hope that at least the time is now going quicker than it did. Through some organizational mistake I no longer get your letters sent on from Berlin, which I’m very sorry about. But I’m still in Berlin quite often and then hear the latest news about you.

I’m sitting here a grass widower again. Grete is up in Friedrichsbrunn with the children…Tomorrow I’m going up there for a couple of days. When I think how much I look forward to seeing them all again, I can just about imagine how you must long to be free once more. If it still goes on lasting all too long I will put in an application for permission to visit you - provided that I don’t get in the way of a visit that you would prefer more. Now that the most beautiful time of year is almost over and everywhere outside looks grey and gloomy you may perhaps miss your freedom less.

Many greetings and all the best.

Your Karl-Friedrich

From Christoph von Dohnanyi

[Sakrow near Potsdam]
4 September 1943

Dear Uncle Dietrich,

We’re back home again. We had to help at Uncle Walter’s.
²⁴
He’s had bad luck again. He already had one lot on I March, but today everything is all over the place. No wonder. Four high explosive bombs fell near him and with those the blast is so strong that people fly out of their beds. With four, of course, it can be quite unpleasant. An Australian baled out in a little wood near the grandparents. He was found asleep by his parachute and was caught straightaway by Herr Schröter. His parachute is still lying in the wood, not far from the grandparents’ house. I can’t imagine how a man can go on sleeping in such a situation.

It was a good thing that the grandparents were spending the night with us, as it always saves the nerves (as the grown-ups put it).

They’re coming again today. That’s good. I must go down. I have to finish the letter quickly as a lot of help is needed. Pictures, washing, carpets, shoes, everything you can think of is dragged round to us. If we can clean it up a bit that’s some use. But it’s not very probable.

Uncle Klaus wants to come tomorrow. I hope something comes of it. Then the family will all be nicely together again. A pity, though, that it’s not quite complete. But that, too, will happen again. Then we shall have the party that we’re all longing for. Till then we have to wait patiently. Some time the day will quite definitely come.

The best part of autumn is now over. The last apple fell from the tree yesterday. It was immediately eaten by me. Unfortunately the wasps had already had quite a good bite out of it, but that’s not altogether a bad sign. Soon the pears will be ripe, and then it will be better again.

This week we have to get the potatoes in. I’m agog to see how many there are. By and large they say that the crop is nothing special. But it varies a good deal.

Now I must stop, because they’re going to collect the post particularly early today. You don’t know what will happen in the night.

I hope, first, that you have an undisturbed night and, secondly, that you have all you need for your ‘well-being’. With much love,

your grateful Christoph

To his parents

[Tegel] 5 September 1943

Dear parents,