She seemed frozen, her eyes boring into him, her mouth slightly open. “I’m sorry,” she whispered eventually.
“What could you possibly be sorry for?”
“I didn’t believe you. I didn’t take your warning seriously.”
He tried to conjure a smile. “You’re the period expert. Like you said, the Archives didn’t have anything about that raid.”
“You didn’t run away, did you?” His hands were trapped. He couldn’t move away without wriggling out of her hold and, right now, that was too precious to leave. He settled for an awkward shrug.
Lila dropped her head and sighed. He felt the warm breath across his arms. She spoke in a whispered rush, the words tumbling over themselves. “Oh God. What have I done? I told everyone you’d abandoned me, that you’d run away and now, if you come home with us, they’ll lock you up. Marc says they might reduce your sentence, but you’d still go to the penal colony.” She peeked up at him. “Is there anyone who can stand up for you? Corroborate your story?”
Reality smacked him in the face again. He dropped back, tugging his hands free and creating a space between them. “I can’t do that.” He stumbled over the words. “I’ve been a prisoner here for two years. I can’t go to the penal colony, Lila. I would die first.”
She hunched over, her face hidden, hands rising to cover her eyes. “We’ll get free and you’ll stay here. That’s the only way, isn’t it?”
Lila
I sat, frozen by indecision and sick with remorse, and saw Jared shrinking back, separating himself from me.
Stupid
. I’d been so caught up in my petty quest for revenge that I’d ignored the obvious. I’d be angry with him later for tricking me into thinking I meant nothing. I knew that had been a pack of lies. My critical subconscious scowled at me. I’d
always
known he was lying to me. I’d just pretended to myself, to soothe my wounded pride.
I lurched forward, reached his firm chest and wrapped my arms around him, to lay my head against his shoulder. “I’m sorry, so sorry.”
He was stiff and unyielding at first, and then I felt him relax. He lifted his arms, inched closer, and sighed against my neck. “Being stuck here, not knowing if you got home safely. It killed me.”
“Being there without you, it nearly killed me.” I wasn’t sure he’d heard my whisper, but his arms tightened around me. His heart raced, and matched my own furious drumbeat. We’d touched many times over the years but never like this. Never this entwined. I knew my face was a mess, my hair disgusting, but in his embrace I felt beautiful. I wanted more. “I missed you.”
I shifted, raised my face, his lips a heartbeat away. At that moment, nothing else mattered; it was just Jared and me and a searing heat blazing from his eyes. “God, Lila.” His voice shook. I gazed at him, longing for him more with each second that passed, but strangely afraid to take the next step. Jared must have read my concern. The corner of his lips tilted upward, sending little crinkles across his rough cheeks, and he moved one hand to gently cup my chin. “May I kiss you?”
My mouth was so dry, I lost the power of speech. I nodded. His smile extended. I saw a flash of white teeth, and he moved closer, his hand sliding up my cheek, the bandage brushing across my tender skin.
His lips swept across mine in the lightest caress, a promise of more later, before pressing butterfly kisses against the corner of my mouth and along my lower lip. Soft, warm and intoxicating, his kiss felt like a drug. He played a little more, nibbling the edge of my jaw, his beard tickling my skin, and then moving impossibly near. Slanting his mouth, he closed his lips over mine and teased me with little flicks of his tongue. I gave in to the pressure of his mouth and opened mine, letting him in, going limp in his arms. My world shrank to a single point of pleasure. If I lived to be a hundred, I would never forget this moment. Heat and strength flooded into me, alongside the tenderness I’d expected from him.
To my alarm, he eased back, lifting his mouth and pulling in a ragged breath that matched my own. “Lila,” he whispered, breath hot against my face. “I dreamed about this and never thought it would happen. I just wish we were somewhere else.”
His hand cupped my neck and he bent his head to press hot lips to my throat, as though the thrall ring wasn’t there.
“Where did we do this in your dreams?” My voice came out wobbly.
Another kiss on the shell of my ear. When had my ears become so sensitive? It felt as though my entire body had been electrified, wired to respond to Jared’s touch. His tongue swirled a hot path down my cheek, paused to kiss the bruise left by the guard, and then rested his forehead against mine. The intimacy drove the breath from my lungs.
“Close your eyes, baby. I’m going to draw a picture in your head.” I complied. “There’s a huge mountain in Wales. The locals call it Eryri. We could spend all day climbing it and still not reach the top, but we’d go there. High up, you’d think we were in the sky itself, the clouds near enough to touch.” His husky whisper captivated me. “Ravens fly above the peaks, rolling and diving in the air currents, while wolves hunt on the ground. There are no men for miles. Just birds and sheep and rabbits. We’d lie on a patch of soft heather as night fell, and watch the full moon rising. It would look huge and orange when it appeared, the color brightening as it climbed in the sky. We’d share a basket of food and a skin of the finest wine, and there, with the moon goddess smiling down at us, I’d kiss you for the first time.” I felt his lips brush against my eyelids. “No, shh, keep your eyes closed.” Featherlight kisses drifted down my nose. “That’s where we are now. Hundreds of miles from here.” He nibbled at my lip again and chuckled softly when I groaned. “Wherever you are,
whenever
you are, think of me when you see the full moon. Remember our kiss.”
Jared
Jared knew, with a certainty so profound he’d stake his life on it, he’d never have this chance again. He drew the picture not just for Lila, but to give himself the illusion of somewhere better. As he coaxed her into his kiss, he gave her everything.
Their lips met in a way he couldn’t have imagined. Yearning, passion, love. All the things he felt, but dared not say aloud. Too soon, he pulled back. He’d sent her home safely last time and he’d do the same now, even if it killed him. The difference was, this time they held no lies between them. He’d bared his soul to her.
She whimpered when they broke apart, nuzzling against him and seeking his lips. He ran his hands across her head, wincing at the loss of her beautiful hair and furious she’d been treated like this. They’d pay. Every last stinking Saxon there.
“I have a plan,” he said. Crazy and half-formed, but better than nothing.
She made a gulping noise, almost a sob, and then turned herself to curve into his side, her arms tight around him. “Tell me.”
He had to keep touching her. While he spoke, he ran his hands up and down her arms, soothing and gentling, much as he would a skittish horse. “They probably won’t need you until dinner. Rather than trying to steal the tools for breaking your chain, I want you to wait here until they come for you.”
Her fingers, up to now drawing little circles on his back, stilled. He hurried to explain. “I’m going to steal some robes as a disguise for us, and then I’ll grab you from the dining hall. It’ll be busy, they won’t see you slip out. Meanwhile, I’m going for your
ghardian
.”
He felt her breath on his neck and had to stop himself from claiming her lips again. Those stolen moments were not enough. A lifetime would not be enough to satisfy his thirst for her.
“How do we get away?”
“You’ve seen the bonfires they’re stacking in the yard?” She nodded. “They’re for the solstice tomorrow. I’m going to light one early, and then in the confusion we grab some ponies and head out.”
Silence met his confident statement. He could practically hear the noise of her brain whirring and he smiled in anticipation of the torrent of questions.
“Has Marc been hurt? Will he be able to ride? What if they try to stop us? Will they see our thrall rings?”
“I think your
ghardian
is fit to sit on a pony’s back.” He couldn’t bring himself to use the man’s name.
The man who would make a commitment with Lila.
“They’re going to be too distracted when the stable block catches fire.”
“The horses—”
“I’m going to free them first, so they can stampede across the yard. Ours will be saddled and waiting, all ready for us.”
Lila shifted in the circle of his arms and stared at him, her eyes wide and anxious. “How are you going to do all that by yourself? Won’t you be missed at dinner?”
The timing would be critical. So many things could go wrong. Even with Kai’s help, their chances of escape together were slim. As before, he planned to stay behind, but this time he
would
get his revenge. He prayed that Lila didn’t spot the huge, gaping hole in his plan.
She frowned, her eyebrows almost meeting in the middle. He longed to soothe away the lines that appeared, to kiss them better. “How do we get out of the gates? The guards will surely stop us.”
“Trust me, baby. They won’t be a problem.” Jared held his breath and waited to see if she challenged him. When she opened her mouth, he stroked her cheek with one finger. “I got you home last time. Let me do so again.”
Lila
I couldn’t bear to let Jared go. I clung to him, cradling his hands in my lap, asking him question after question. Anything to make him stay with me a little longer.
“Where are they holding Marc? Can I come with you? How long do we have until dinner?”
“They’ve got him locked in a cell on the other side of the hall. I need to bluff my way in and grab his stunner. Once the guard is unconscious, we’ll have maybe an hour before he raises the alarm.”
I nodded. “Dinner?”
He glanced at the tiny window. “No more than three hours. It’ll be easier for us to leave under cover of darkness, but it won’t be fully dark for another four or five hours.” There was a pause. He stared at our hands and spoke absently, as though he were distracted. “Dinner lasts all night, especially with a crowd of visitors to entertain, so just keep your head down and do as they tell you. When the sun sets, that’s when I’ll free your
ghardian
and come for you. Have you got that?”
My heart hammered against my ribs, but I kept my voice calm. “Yes. We go at sunset.” I stroked the bandages and remembered how good it felt when Jared held me.
How it might feel if we lay together?
My cheeks burned at the idea and I tried to ignore it, but once let in, it wasn’t leaving again anytime soon. Like it or not, I’d crossed a line.
“When did you last eat?”
I had to think about his question. So much had happened today. “Dinner last night, but I’m not hungry. I’m too tense.”
He nodded. “Even so, I’ll try to scrounge some food. There’s someone else that we’re taking with us, by the way. A slave. Her name is Kai.”
Kai? A lover perhaps? Or just a friend? I hated my uncertainty. “Oh?”
I saw guilt flash across his eyes. “I promised I wouldn’t leave her behind.”
“Can you trust her? The reason Marc and I were taken is because one of your slave friends couldn’t keep his mouth shut.”
Jared’s eyes narrowed at my sharpness. “What are you talking about?”
“The kitchen slave. Conrad? He told Rowena that Marc and I were asking about you.”
“
Connad
.” Anger bloomed on his face. He pulled his hands free, stood up and crossed his arms across his chest. “I should have guessed. The
bastard
.” He moved away walking jerkily, his shoulders stiff and jaw clenched. “He hates me because I took his place in Hilde’s affections.” He spat the words out. “I would have far rather stayed in the kitchens.” He spun to face me and stopped abruptly. “Kai is different—she’s a child. She brought you some water and a message from me.”
I felt a pulse of relief, and then immediately questioned it. Had I been feeling jealous? I would have to file that away in the think-about-later box. Right now, Jared waited for me to say something.
“Yes, she did.” I wanted to say more, but Jared stopped me with one finger resting gently on my lips.
“I’ll come back as soon as I can. Try and rest.”
He strode away, turning briefly at the doorway to look over his shoulder at me. He gave me a nod, as though satisfied with something, and disappeared.
Rest?
How could I possibly rest with so many things hurtling around inside my brain? Jared.
That kiss.
Marc. Escape. What would happen if we failed?
I reached up and touched my lips. They felt the same, but I was different. And I’d never be the same again. A footstep snagged my attention, and I looked up, eager to see Jared back already. I didn’t expect a guard to be grinning down at me, a look of anticipation on his craggy face.
“Well, little Mudd. Mistress Rowena has demanded your presence.”
Jared
Every cell in Jared’s body screamed at him to stay with Lila in the sleeping quarters. He feared she’d vanish again, be whisked away before he could get back to her. If he didn’t get the preparations underway, though, the escape would never happen.
He was out of time.
The litany of things to do almost deafened him.
Until sunset
. He blinked in the bright sunlight, hastened across to the stable block, and successfully dodged the extra horses. The grooms were arguing when he slipped through the doors, and he paused to listen. Not enough room to keep all the horses inside, but the warlord was adamant he didn’t want his stallions or breeding mares turned out to grass. Jared lurked, and then leaped forward to help lead some of the ponies out to the paddock.
The next item on his list was almost as simple. In the confusion, he had no trouble putting aside two saddles and bridles, and hiding them at the back of the hay store. Stealing robes would be more difficult, but not impossible. He headed to the laundry area and again made sure he was in the right place to help the already overworked slaves. He had to find Kai and bring her up to speed on his plans, but first he had time to go back to the sleeping quarters. By his estimate, it was still an hour before the slaves would be called to serve dinner.