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Authors: Barbara Huffert

“An acquaintance is all she ever was. We went out a few times but there wasn’t anything between us.”

“But she’s beautiful. Even prettier than that woman you were with when we met.”

“Do you honestly believe that I’m that shallow? Sure, she looks good on the outside but that’s not what does it for me. There wasn’t much else to her which is why we never got to be more than acquaintances. We met in a bar when I stopped for a drink on the way home with some of the guys from the station and she invited me to a benefit party. We went to dinner alone one time after that and I discovered we had nothing to say to each other so I didn’t ask her out again. I also turned her down when she called me.”

“Guess I was wrong but between her and that other woman and what I heard Barry say…”

“What did Barry say?”

“Well, he was talking to Carla and I didn’t hear what she asked but he said something about you being with the flavor of the week so I just assumed that meant you go through a lot of different women.”

Guy took a deep breath to rein in his temper before he responded. “I admit that I’ve dated a lot. I admit that I didn’t see most of the women more than a few times. I admit that I am sexually experienced. But if you’re assuming I got that experience by sleeping with every woman I dated, you’re very wrong. If you expected me to walk out on you because a woman you consider pretty seemed to know me then you are wrong again. Believe it or not, I’m not the hound you think I am. I treat women with respect or I try to at least. No, I wasn’t polite to Candy but she wasn’t at all polite to us either,” he snorted. “I guess I really was just the most convenient option for you last night after all.” He signaled for the waiter without saying another word and barely waited for her to follow him out of the restaurant.

They drove back to Tori’s house in complete silence. She had no idea how to approach Guy through the mounting tension surrounding him.

“Wait here,” Guy snapped coldly when he pulled into her driveway. Still without looking at her, he took the keys and locked the door behind him.

Tori watched as he quickly checked through the house to ensure it was untouched in the time they were gone. He returned, disengaging the lock and opened her door, taking their boxed dinners from her hand. Inside, he put his in the refrigerator and left hers on the counter. He activated the alarm system with one control unit but kept both to prevent her from trying to sneak out later as he challenged her with a stare.

“Goodnight,” he said curtly before leaving her standing in the living room alone.

Tori forced herself to move. Guy’s room was dark by the time she made it upstairs so she decided to turn in as well. It was extremely early but she had no desire to sit up by herself. She felt numb as she replayed the way the evening had ended. Every time she pictured the hurt expression that had been on his face while he defended himself, the lump in her throat grew until she couldn’t stand it.

Standing in the hall outside his room, she tapped lightly on the open door. “Are you awake?” she asked softly so she wouldn’t disturb him if he was sleeping.

“Yes.”

“Can I please come in and talk for a minute?”

“Yes.”

“Do you mind if I turn on a light?”

“No.”

Afraid to face him, Tori chose to switch on the small light on the dresser instead of the one next to the bed. After several deep breaths for courage, she turned toward him but stayed where she was.

“Well?” Guy prompted when she didn’t speak.

Tori could feel the hurt radiating from him as easily as she heard it in his voice. “I owe you an apology. I was wrong and I’m sorry.”

“Fine,” he dismissed her.

Tori knew he wanted her to go back to her room but instead she had to continue. “I should have stopped you right away before you said all that.”

“Why?”

“Because I already knew you aren’t the way I let you make it sound. Other than that one comment, Barry always said good things about you. When I was upset about meeting you instead of Barry, Diana assured me that you were a good man. I did hear you when you were talking about your mom rearing you to be as decent as your dad is and how he helped too.” She finally looked at him and saw he was watching her intently although he had his hands behind his head in what appeared to be a relaxed pose. “I’m so sorry.”

Guy waited to see if she’d retreat before he moved to hold up the edge of the covers. “You’re shivering. Come here so we can talk about this without your teeth chattering.”

Tori saw that he expected her to refuse and made herself slide in next to him. She was surprised when he pulled her to his side instead of maintaining the distance she left between them. He sighed as he settled her against his chest with his arms wrapped around her.

“If you believed I wasn’t all bad then what was that all about? Why did you want me to feel like some self-centered asshole who only paid attention to a woman to see what I could get from her and ditched her as soon as I had? I don’t understand.”

“I’m sorry, Guy.”

“Me too. Tori, I’m sorry for blowing up and shutting you out and walking away from you in the restaurant and here without talking to you. What are you sorry for?”

Tori shook her head against his chest and gulped for air.

“Come on, Tor.”

“Just give me a second. I never really said this out loud before.” She let out a humorless laugh. “I never admitted it either, not even to myself. I’m going to screw this up big-time so bear with me, okay?”

Guy must have sensed how hard it was for Tori to begin so he snuggled her closer. “I’m not going anywhere so take your time.”

“Thanks. When I told Diana we had a date planned she said some things that got me thinking. Some were the same as she’s always said. Some were specifically about you. See, I told her why I wasn’t sure that we were really interested in each other. I also said I doubted you’d even consider going out with me if you weren’t stuck with me like you are now. I described the woman you were with and insisted there was no way you’d pick someone like me over someone like that.”

“Tori—”

“No. Please let me say this.” Guy responded by kissing her forehead. “Diana’s been trying to build my self-esteem for years but I still have a hard time accepting what she says. When I said that, she got a little annoyed and brought up how you might share her opinion instead of mine and actually do like me,” she relayed their conversation before pausing for a deep breath to give herself courage for what she wanted to say next.

“Diana said that was fine as long as I wasn’t making excuses to stop you from getting too close. Ever since we met, Diana’s been very kind to me. She offered me friendship right from the start and it took me a long time to believe she meant it. Even when I was little I believed that people only wanted to be around each other for what they could get. My parents always took us to the salon with them and paraded us around like little clones, making us look like adults before we even went to school. My brother and sister loved the attention and couldn’t get enough of it. I always tried to hide so I could wipe off the makeup. I hated the way it felt on my face as much as I hated the way being dressed up made me feel inside. They even insisted I keep my hair long so they could show off whatever the latest style was. I got it cut the first day I got here, as soon as I left the library, before I started looking for a place to stay.

“They always told me I was the plain one, the one who would have to settle for whatever I could get after all the good ones were taken. Diana decided that I don’t let anyone get even moderately close to me because I’m afraid they’ll say the same things as my parents and reject me like they did. If I don’t let anyone get to know me then it won’t hurt when they tell me to get lost.

“I always denied that and told Diana she had no idea what she was talking about because there was no way I do that. I have a whole list of reasons for why I’m right and she’s wrong. I won’t bother to tell you though because I can’t keep lying to myself. Diana is right about all of it. I was so scared when we walked into the restaurant and I saw that Candy looking at you. After she saw you, she noticed me. She looked at me like I was less than dirt and not worth wasting even half a thought on.

“I don’t know how I knew what would get to you but I did and I kept picking even though I could see I was hurting you. I knew it but I couldn’t stop because if I did I wouldn’t be able to keep my distance from you and I have to or it will hurt too much when you decide you’re done with me.”

“Tori—”

“No.” She was crying. “You’re one of the really, really good ones and I’m so not. Last night was incredible but I know it wasn’t real. No way could that last. Can’t we just chalk it up to circumstances and let me have the memory of what you made me feel being magical instead of drawing this out until you get bored with me? I’m so sorry I hurt you and I shouldn’t have forced you like I did last night. I should never have made that deal with you. I was selfish but I won’t hold you to it so please can’t we pretend it never happened and forget about it?”

Guy held her while she cried her heart out. He waited until she quieted before he spoke. “My turn. The morning I came to the library to beg you to start over, Diana stopped me as I was leaving. She warned me that you would do your best to chase me away and I promised I wouldn’t let you. When Barry and I were sitting in the car waiting for it to be late enough for me to drag you out of the library, he took a break from busting my balls to make sure I understood how hard you’d fight against letting me get close to you. Again I was positive nothing you threw at me would make any difference because I’m never giving up. I really thought I could handle whatever you came up with and I caved in after five minutes. I like to think I would have figured it out eventually and found a way to get you to talk to me again but I honestly didn’t have a clue. Some Alpha male I turned out to be.”

“Why would Diana say that to you?”

“Because she could see how fascinated I was by you. Your family is the biggest bunch of misguided fools. They obviously never bothered to look beyond what they tried to mold you into because if they had they would have seen that you are the best there is. They were idiots to bury your face under makeup. And why would anyone with even a minimal understanding of hair ever mess with yours? It’s soft and fluffy and it’s all I can do to keep from toying with it all the time.”

“You don’t have to do this. I never let myself believe you were staying so I’m okay now that you know what’s going on. I won’t lie and say I would have turned you down if you wanted a repeat of last night but I know it wouldn’t have been the same. I’d rather skip it so I get to keep the memory.”

“For Christ’s sake, would you stop before you royally piss me off!” Guy’s arms became steel bands so she couldn’t escape. “Honestly listen for a change because this is extremely important. Diana is right. I have been wasting time with the wrong sort of women. When you stepped into that bar I felt like I’d been sucker punched in the gut. Part of me wanted to drag you right out of there and lock us up together forever. The other part of me was scared to death. Most of the reason I was an ass was because of that. The other night when I was telling you about finding the right one, I had to force myself not to say you were it for me.”

“Don’t—”

“No! It’s my turn now so just listen. I know you’re scared and I understand why. I get that this isn’t going to be easy for you and you’re going to struggle every step of the way. I’m sure you’ll manage to zing me like you did tonight but I’m not giving up. We have a deal and you promised me a chance and I refuse to let you off the hook. I know it’s too soon to tell you that I love you like I did after you went to sleep last night so I’ll wait.” He didn’t give her a chance to interrupt. “I swear I will prove that we belong together even if it takes the rest of my life to hear you say it too. Now about the sex, last night was just as overwhelming for me as it was for you. Yes, I’m experienced but it has never even come close to what we shared. As for getting bored and not being as good if we tried again, you are wrong. I’ll prove that to you too. Hell, Tori, I never did what we did before.”

“Yeah, right. Like I’m really going to believe that one. You knew exactly what to do the whole time.”

“Yes, I did but I was going on instinct. Your body showed me what it needed and all I did was follow your lead. Deny it all you want but that is one hundred percent true. I’ve gotten a little crude at times but I never spoke to anyone the way I did to you. I never lasted as long as I did with you. I never had anyone respond like you did. I never had any interest in spanking anyone, not even when I was invited to but with you I felt like I had to. I never suggested anal sex or stuck my fingers in anyone’s ass unless the woman I was with brought it up first but last night I couldn’t have resisted yours if my life had depended on it. The thought of some other man even looking at your naked body is enough to make me lose control. If someone else actually touched you I’d probably end up in jail. Face it, tiger. I’m hooked and you’re going to have to learn to deal with it because you’re stuck with me.”

“Stop it. Just stop it. Don’t say anything else because I can’t handle it right now. I keep thinking you’re only saying this stuff to get back at me for hurting you and I don’t really believe you would but I’m about to freak out on you and I don’t want to do that, so please stop talking like that.”

“All right. You win. Calm down and breathe. I’ll drop it for now but we’re nowhere near done with this. We’ll never be done with this because I’ll keep telling you even after you accept it.”

“Guy.” She struggled again.

“Hold still. I won’t say any more tonight although I sure wouldn’t mind talking dirty with you. Hey, maybe you could talk and I’ll just lay here and listen.”

“God, you’re impossible.”

“Probably, but I made you smile and you’re not as tense as you were ten minutes ago so I can’t be all bad.”

“You’re insane. Yeah, that’s it. You are completely insane and for some reason you can’t hide it around me like you do with everyone else.”

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