Little Girl Lost (15 page)

The Mount Isa trucking depot was not the most attractive sight. There were several big warehouses made of unpainted corrugated iron and some were starting to rust. In the corners of the yard, an assortment of old fuel drums and rusting engine parts lay among the long brown tufts of wiry grass. The large parking area was finished in dull grey bitumen and usually held a few trucks. The whole place always seemed to smell of diesel fuel, grease and sweat. The site covered more than three hectares and was surrounded by a two metre high cyclone fence, the chain linked sections topped with barbed wire. To Pete, at this moment, it was a very welcome sight.

The sun was only just peeping over the horizon, but already the big swinging gates were open, and there were people moving around inside. The huge trucks were the lifeline of the outback, and they rarely sat still for long. Pete pulled his rig around to the back of the yard. With relief, he turned the engine off. The drive from the Creek had taken him more than ten hours. Coming on the back of the physical exertion of the search for Renee, he was totally shattered. Emotionally as well as physically. He probably shouldn’t have been driving. He was over his hours. He had pulled over to get some sleep, but had simply lain in the sleeping compartment, staring out into the darkness. The turmoil raging in his mind made sleep impossible, so instead he’d driven on through the night.

He jumped down from the rig, and the first thing he saw was Mick walking towards him.

‘G’day, Pete.’

‘Mick. Any news from the hospital?’

‘Not since last night. My missus dropped round and told Linda you were on your way. She said she was really happy about that. Cried a bit, according to the missus, but you know how women are.’

‘And the baby is …?’

‘The docs still say everything is okay.’

Pete felt as if someone had lifted the Sydney Harbour Bridge off his shoulders. All night his head had been spinning with worry about his unborn child. When Linda first told him she was pregnant, he was shocked. He hadn’t wanted the baby. But things had changed. During these last few days, he had changed. Ever since Dustin had placed his small hand inside Pete’s bigger one, Pete had felt something stirring in his heart. This might not be how he planned to have a child, but he wanted that small one now. He would love that child and be the very best father he could be. He still wasn’t sure what that meant for his relationship with Linda – or the feelings he had for Sarah. But he no longer doubted his feelings for his child.

‘I’ve got to get to the hospital,’ he said, running his fingers through his hair. ‘Can I borrow your car?’

‘Sure, mate, but don’t you want to grab a shower and a cup of coffee first?’

‘I …’ Pete hesitated and looked at his watch. It was not quite six thirty. Linda would hopefully still be asleep. The hospital might not even let him in this early. He probably looked like he’d been through a wringer – which he had. He was dirty and his shirt had been torn by some tree branch during the search. He didn’t smell very good either. He probably shouldn’t startle Linda by turning up looking like this.

‘You’re right. If we swing past my place I can clean up, and then take my own car to the hospital.’

The shower and change of clothes helped a lot, as did the smell of the coffee Mick brewed. When Pete walked into the kitchen, his friend handed him a mug of the steaming black liquid. Neither sat down.

‘Pete …’ Mick started hesitantly. ‘Before this … I didn’t know. I mean about the baby and all.’

‘We didn’t tell anyone,’ Pete said. ‘Linda wanted to wait for a while just in case …’ He had been about to say in case something went wrong, but he couldn’t finish the sentence.

‘I knew the two of you were, you know, but I didn’t think it was that serious.’ Mick sipped his own coffee and avoided Pete’s eyes.

‘Well, a baby is pretty serious,’ Pete said.

‘And you’re sure …?’

‘That we want to keep it? Yes, of course we’re sure,’ Pete said. ‘And I’m going to love that kid and do the right thing by it.’

Mick hesitated a fraction of a second, as if he had something else to say. But then he nodded. ‘Well, if you’re all right, mate, I gotta go. I’ve got a load to take out this morning.’

‘Yeah, Mick, I’m fine. Thanks for the lift.’

‘Sure. No worries. Give Linda our best.’

There was no mistaking the smell of a hospital, Pete thought a short time later as he walked through the sliding glass doors. It was after seven thirty now, and the reception desk was open. Two women looked up as he approached. He asked after Linda, explaining why it had taken him this long to get to the hospital.

‘Oh, we heard all about the search,’ one of the women gushed. ‘You were part of that? You helped save that poor little girl. There was such a lovely photo on the ABC website of her and her parents being reunited. How wonderful that you were part of that. It’s not visiting hours yet, but I guess for a hero we can make an exception.’

Pete didn’t argue. He listened to her directions and set off through the maze of almost deserted hospital corridors. At last he found the right ward, and carefully he entered.

Linda lay sleeping on one of the four beds, covered with just a light cotton sheet. The other beds were unoccupied and Pete was glad of the privacy. Careful not to wake Linda, he crossed the room and slid into a chair, from where he could watch her sleep.

Her face looked a bit pale, and her eyes were red as if she’d been crying. That was probably his fault, because he hadn’t been there for her. As he looked at her face, he was swamped with guilt and more. He felt sympathy for Linda, facing this scare alone. He felt concern for her health and for the baby she carried. She stirred a little in her sleep, and her movement pulled the light sheet tighter around her body. For the first time, Pete imagined he could see a slight thickening of her waist. The beginnings of a baby bump. He knew that he would love that child, but he couldn’t fool himself any longer. He didn’t love Linda. He never would. Sarah had captured his heart a long, long time ago, and he was only just beginning to realise that he didn’t ever want to get it back.

He didn’t know if Sarah would have him. But even if she didn’t, he could not marry Linda. It wouldn’t be fair on her, or on their child. Linda was a good person who deserved someone to love her in a way that he never could. He would always be there for her, and for their child, but not as her husband.

It appeared he had made a decision. After all those hours of agonising, the decision had come to him in a moment, because it was the right decision. He knew that it was. Just as he knew that now wasn’t the time to tell Linda. She needed all his support. And she would have it. When this crisis had passed and she was stronger, he’d tell her.

Then he would go to Sarah and explain everything. She was hurting. He’d seen that in her face those moments before she turned away from him. He hoped beyond everything that she would listen and forgive him.

His future was with her … if she would have him, but in the meantime, he had Linda to care for.

She was still sleeping. Pete felt his own head nod. He shook it. He mustn’t go to sleep. Tired as he was, he had to be there and awake when Linda woke up.

That was his last thought before his eyes fell shut and darkness claimed him.

Max waited until it was almost lunchtime. He wanted to give the Haywoods as much private time as he could. But duty called and he finally drove down to the hospital. The big motorhome was still in the car park, but it was locked up tight. He hoped it was a rental. He doubted that after the past few days the Haywoods would try another camping holiday.

Doctor Adam met him at the top of the stairs.

‘How is Renee?’ Max asked.

‘She’s doing fine,’ said Adam. ‘You know, kids amaze me. They are so much tougher than we give them credit for.’

‘I need to talk to the family,’ Max said. ‘Paperwork and all that. It won’t take long. Are they up for it?’

‘Yeah. No worries.’

As both men turned to walk back into the hospital, they came face to face with Evan Haywood.

‘Max!’ Evan grabbed the policeman’s hand and shook it. ‘I was about to head into town to find you and say thank you. Thank you so much. I cannot begin to describe—’

‘No thanks necessary,’ Max interrupted him. ‘Adam tells me Renee is doing well.’

‘Yes. Yes. She is. She’s wonderful.’

‘That’s good news. I need to talk to you and her, if that’s all right. Just for the report I have to file. It will only take a few minutes.’

‘Of course. Come on through.’

When he entered the hospital room, Max was delighted to see Renee sitting up in bed, her blonde head and her brother’s almost touching as they peered at the screen of their computer tablet. The girl’s skin was still red with sunburn, and the scratches stood out clearly, but her eyes were bright and when she laughed at something happening on the screen, it was one of the nicest sounds Max had ever heard. Their mother was also sharing the bed, and every few seconds she reached out to touch Renee’s hair, as if to reassure herself that her little girl was still there. The bedraggled teddy bear was sitting on Renee’s lap.

‘Hello, Renee.’

The little girl looked up.

‘Hello.’

‘This is the policeman who helped bring you home,’ her father said. ‘Say thank you.’

‘Thank you.’

‘You are very welcome, sweetheart.’ Max lowered himself into the room’s only chair. ‘Now, because I’m a policeman, I have to ask you some questions about how you got lost. Is that all right?’

Renee nodded warily.

‘It won’t take long, I promise.’

The little girl leaned back against her mother and pulled the teddy bear tight against her chest.

‘Renee, honey, he’s awfully dirty now. Why don’t you give him to me, and Daddy will go and find you a nice new teddy. An even better one.’

Renee pursed her lips, shook her head and pulled the bear closer. Max had a feeling it would be a very long time indeed before Renee let go of that bear. When the little girl was grown and had a daughter of her own, that bear would probably still be part of her family.

‘You know, you felt better after a bath yesterday, didn’t you?’ Evan said. ‘Well, teddy might feel better after a bath too. How about you and I give him a bath after the sergeant has finished asking his questions.’

‘All right.’

‘In the meantime,’ Max said. ‘I have something here.’

He stepped over to the bed. ‘Close your eyes and hold out your hand.’

The little girl did as instructed and Max placed a carving on her open palm. Her eyes flashed open.

‘Ooh. Look, Mummy. A kangaroo.’

‘It’s beautiful, darling. What do you say to the officer?’

‘Thank you,’ Renee said shyly.

‘You’re very welcome,’ Max said. ‘And, Dustin, I didn’t forget you.’ He handed the boy a wooden eagle, its wings spread in full flight.

‘Wow. That’s great,’ Dustin said. ‘Did you make this?’

‘I did.’

‘Cool. Thanks.’

As he opened his notebook, Max decided this family was going to be fine.

Sarah unlocked the front door of the shop and looked out into the deserted street. It was just gone nine o’clock in the morning, and things around Coorah Creek were starting to return to normal. For the past two nights, the pub had been overflowing with people talking about the search and the rescue of little Renee. Her parents had suggested Sarah go over and join the celebration, but she hadn’t. Glad as she was for Renee and her family, there was nothing in Sarah’s world to celebrate.

For the one thousandth time, her eyes turned towards the road north. The road leading to Mount Isa. She didn’t expect to see the big blue and white Mercedes rig, but that didn’t stop her heart from holding on to one last faint glimmer of hope. And she hated herself for that. Almost as much as she hated Pete.

He had a girlfriend and she was pregnant. Despite that he’d kissed Sarah. Allowed her to believe … And she had believed because that girlish crush had never gone away. Not even during those four big city years she’d joked about. Big city years in which she had dated her fair share of men. But not one of them had come close to touching her heart the way Pete had done without even trying.

But he’d deceived her. And deceived his girlfriend; his pregnant girlfriend. He was a coward and a liar and a cheat and … There were not enough insults in the English language to truly capture how she felt about him.

Because her heart was breaking.

She heard a noise behind her and turned back into the shop. Her mother was behind the counter, setting up for the day’s trading. Theirs was no big city supermarket. Their cash register was old. It didn’t even have a bar code scanner. But that didn’t matter. The people who shopped here were not in a big city kind of hurry. They stayed to chat while their groceries were rung up by hand. Shopping was still an outing in Coorah Creek – not a chore.

Unaware that Sarah was watching, her mother paused and closed her eyes, taking a low slow breath as if to try to muster enough energy for the day ahead. Sarah frowned. Her father was looking a little better now the chemo was over. But her mother wasn’t. She still looked exhausted. That was not good. Sarah had come home to help, it was time she stopped mooning over a treacherous lying truckie, and started behaving like a loving daughter.

‘Mum, why don’t you head back to the house?’ she said. ‘I’ve got everything under control. Take a day off. Spend some time with Dad. If I need you, I can call.’

Gina’s shoulders sagged. ‘If you’re sure …’

‘I’m sure. Go.’ Sarah sent her mother on her way with a quick hug. As she did, she saw the look of relief on a face far too lined with care. Her mother seemed to have aged ten years in the last few months.

Sarah finished preparing the counter for the day’s trading, but it was still a bit early for customers. She made herself a cup of tea at the sink in the rear of the store, and then stepped out the front door again, telling herself she just wanted to watch the world go by. She wasn’t waiting for anyone in particular.

The first people she saw were the Haywoods. The big gold motorhome was parked on the side of the road near the pub, exactly where it had been parked the first time Sarah had seen it. She smiled a little as she noticed a yellow teddy bear, looking newly washed and brushed, sitting in the window. It seemed such a very long time since she had sold that bear to the Haywoods. She was glad that little Renee had at least had her new friend for comfort during those long scary hours alone in the bush.

The family were just alighting from the vehicle. Mrs Haywood was firmly holding Renee’s hand. Sarah had a feeling it would be a long time before she felt easy about letting go. The icy-cold, well-groomed and fashionable blonde of a few days ago was nowhere to be seen. Mrs Haywood wore no make-up and her hair was caught in a ponytail. She laughed as she bent over to listen to something her daughter said. She and her husband shared a look and both smiled. Sarah wondered if maybe some good had come from all that trauma after all.

Seeing Sarah in the door of the store, the Haywoods crossed the road.

‘Good morning,’ she said as they approached. ‘It’s good to see Renee looking so well.’

The little girl looked up at hearing her name. The scratches on her face were healing, as was her sunburnt skin. Her brother was standing very close to her. Obviously the guilt Dustin felt at losing her was still fresh in his mind. She could only hope that time would heal him as it healed his sister.

‘Hello,’ Evan Haywood replied. ‘You’re Sarah, aren’t you?’

‘Yes.’

‘You were out there with the searchers. I remember seeing you.’

‘I was,’ she said.

‘Thank you,’ Mrs Haywood said. ‘If you, and all the others hadn’t been there to help …’

‘Don’t think about that,’ Sarah said kindly. ‘There were a lot of people out there. We had all the thanks we needed when we saw Tia and Pete carry Renee into the camp.’

‘Is Pete here?’ the boy asked.

‘No,’ she said, trying to keep her heartache out of her voice. ‘He’s off somewhere delivering a big load in his truck.’

‘I wanted to say goodbye.’

‘I’ll tell him goodbye from you when I see him.’ Sarah wondered if she would ever get the chance to keep her promise.

‘All right.’

‘And what about the girl who brought Renee back. Tia?’ Haywood asked.

‘I’ll pass on your thanks to her,’ Max said as he approached from the direction of the police station. ‘She’s on shift at the mine today, but I will be seeing her tomorrow.’

‘Please make sure she knows how terribly grateful we are to her … to the trackers. To everyone.’

‘I will,’ Max said.

‘I would like to do something to show my gratitude,’ Haywood continued. ‘But I don’t know what. Can you suggest something?’

‘That’s not necessary, you know,’ Sarah said kindly.

‘But still …’ Haywood said. ‘I want to do something. Something for the whole town.’

‘Come back some time. Bring the kids and have a good holiday here,’ Sarah said. ‘Make some good memories for them. That would be one way of saying thank you.’

Haywood nodded. ‘I might just do that.’

He looked at his wife for agreement, but she said nothing. Sarah had a feeling this was the last time she would ever see the Haywoods. Not that she blamed them. Some things are so painful, you never want to go back and face the memories.

‘Kids, we’d better go. We have a long trip in front of us,’ Haywood said. He turned to Max and shook his hand. ‘I cannot thank you enough. For everything.’ Then, overcome with emotion, he clasped Max in a hug, pounding his back in an attempt to fight back his emotions. When Haywood finally released him, Max bent down to Renee, who was clutching a carved wooden kangaroo in her hand.

‘Now, young lady,’ Max said with mock severity. ‘Do you promise me you won’t wander off again?’

‘I promise.’

‘Good.’ Max enveloped the child in a quick hug.

It was hard to watch the touching farewell. All Sarah could think about was Pete – soon to be a father. And the woman who would be his wife and the mother of his child. Soon they would be a family like the Haywoods. She wanted to wish Pete well, but she couldn’t. It hurt too much. Instead she raised a hand in farewell and walked back into the shop.

Sarah tried to keep herself busy restocking shelves, but she was very pleased when, a short time later, the door opened to reveal her first customer of the day who was, mercifully, a stranger.

‘What can I get you?’ she asked.

‘I need something cold and wet,’ the man replied, reaching for a can of Coke in the fridge. ‘And directions to the Goongalla mine.’

‘I can help you with both,’ Sarah said, thinking as she did that he didn’t look like a miner. He was definitely a man from the city. Young and flashy, dressed in pointy-toed shoes, and a black shirt that could have been silk. The shirtsleeves were rolled up, revealing part of a tattoo on his arm. Sarah couldn’t see it clearly, but it could almost be a Ned Kelly-style helmet, with crossed antique pistols beneath it.

‘Thanks.’

His smile was a bit … slimy. She certainly wouldn’t trust him. He was probably a con man. Or a criminal. She wondered what his business at the mine might be. Nothing good, she was sure of it.

Then Sarah caught herself. She was just transferring her anger and hurt with Pete onto this poor man, who was probably an accountant or something equally harmless. It was time she stopped building fantasies of her own devising about people. The world was not full of criminal masterminds and knights in shining armour. She had to grow up.

She handed over the change and gave the man directions to the mine.