Living with Jackie Chan (19 page)

“Nice to meet you.” She pulls out a bunch of gold and silver rings and sets them in front of us. A lot of them look like the usual diamond ring, just with slightly different designs on the bands.

Larry picks one up that has tiny diamonds all the way around it rather than one big one.

“Oh, that one really is unique,” Grace says. “Look.” She takes the ring from Larry and shows how the diamonds are on some sort of inner ring that turns. She puts it on her finger and spins the ring of diamonds with her thumb. “Isn’t that fun?”

Larry takes the ring back and puts it on the tip of his pinkie. He makes the diamonds spin. “Cool,” he says. “What do you guys think?”

“Let me try it,” Stella says. She puts the ring on and holds her hand out, fingers splayed apart. She moves the inner ring and the diamonds sparkle as they spin around her finger. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

“It is,” I say.

Her cheeks turn pink. My own face feels warm, too.

“It’s very unique,” Grace interrupts. “It’s lovely on you.” I think she is going in for the big sale, because obviously this ring, with all the diamonds, is going to be a lot more expensive than the others.

Larry steps back and squints at the ring on Stella’s finger, tilting his head at different angles. “I just don’t know,” he says. “Maybe too flashy.”

Stella slides it off her finger and carefully hands it back to Grace.

“Is this a surprise engagement?” Grace asks. “If not, why don’t you bring your fiancée here to see what she likes. An engagement ring is an important purchase. She’ll be wearing it for the rest of her life.”

“It’s a surprise,” Larry says hopelessly. “Crap. I don’t want to screw this up. I want it to be romantic.”

He sounds like a little kid.

“You don’t have to decide right this minute,” I say. I take him by the arm. “Come on, let’s check out a few more places.”

Stella hesitates at the counter a little bit longer, looking at the ring in a dreamy way. She’s probably daydreaming about getting engaged to
Britt.

“C’mon, Stell,” I say, pulling her away from the counter.

Grace gives me a dirty look, like I just blew her chance on a giant commission. I give her what I hope is an apologetic look. Because I do feel bad. But this is Larry. We have to make sure he’s happy.

We go outside and walk down the sidewalk until we find a café, where Larry buys us all hot chocolate.

“This is hopeless,” Larry says when we sit at a tiny table in the back. “Maybe that lady’s right. Maybe I should just ask Arielle first, and then let her pick out a ring.”

“No,” Stella and I say at the same time.

“I think Arielle will love whatever you pick out,” I say. “It’s not about the ring. It’s about you, you know, telling her you love her and want to spend the rest of your life with her.”

Larry clutches his chest and pushes back his seat dramatically, as if I just said the most earth-shattering thing he ever heard.

Stella laughs.

“What?”

“I do believe my nephew is a hopeless romantic. Who would’ve thunk it?”

Ha. Ha.

“Right. Whatever. All I’m saying is, I think you’re getting way too stressed out over this.”

“Josh is right,” Stella says. “If someone proposed to me, I wouldn’t care about the ring. I’d just care about the proposal. And what the guy said. Like, how he would always love me.”

Larry sighs. “I know, I know. In the ideal world, you’re right. But I’m so afraid Arielle will say no. I mean, it’s like you said. It’s the rest of our
lives
!”

I don’t point out that, in fact, statistically, marriage is only for the rest of your life fifty percent of the time.

“Look,” I say to Larry. “Do you really think she’s going to say no because she doesn’t like the ring you pick out? Get a clue. If she’s that shallow, she doesn’t deserve you.”

“She’s not,” Larry says, all defensive.

“I know. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. Don’t sweat the ring.”

We finish our drinks and decide to call it a day. Larry seems kind of withdrawn as we walk home.

“Through the park?” he asks hopefully when we get to the entrance.

“I gotta get back,” Stella says. “But you two go.” She looks like part of her really wants to stay with us. But she’s already reaching in her purse for her phone.

“You sure?” Larry asks.

“Yeah, it’s daytime. No worries.” She gives Larry a big hug and whispers something in his ear. We watch her hurry down the sidewalk and disappear around the corner.

“You guys would make the cutest couple,” Larry says.

I give him a shove.

“I’m serious!”

“I know,” I say. Well, not about the cute part. But she’s with
Britt.
And after seeing them together in the hall that day, I know she’s happy. “You gotta let it go, though, Lar. She’s got a boyfriend.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

It’s sunny, and warm for March, and there are quite a few people out walking their dogs. We go a ways without talking, then Larry grabs my arm and stops.

“I’m going to do it next weekend,” he says, as if he just decided. “If I don’t do it soon, I’ll go nuts. This whole thing is causing me way too much stress.”

“OK,” I say.

“That’s it? Just OK?”

“Um, would congratulations be premature?”

“No!”

“Just kidding! I’m really happy for you, Lar. I mean it.”

“Hey,” he says, facing me. He puts both hands on my shoulders. His fingers press through my jacket and squeeze.

“Easy,” I say, looking around and hoping no one sees this strange act of affection.

“Be my best man,” he says. “Will you?”

“What?
Me?
Why?”

He lets go. “Because you’re my man! Samurai Sam!”

I stare at him.

“My
man
!” he says again.

I really wish he wouldn’t say that. Especially in public.

“What about my dad?” I ask.

Larry rolls his eyes. “You know Hal and I have never been close. Plus, can you see him in a tux? C’mon. Say yes, Sammy. Pleeeeeeease?”

Anything to make him stop calling me that.

He waits, peering into my face like a puppy waiting for me to toss him a ball. I smile, realizing how much I love my uncle, sappy as that seems. He took me in when he hardly knew me. He brought me into his life and got me into a sport I never would have imagined being able to do, much less like. He makes me laugh. He makes me feel like I’m not a loser. Like I really could be someone or do something good with my life. He makes me feel like I matter. I can’t believe I spent the past few weeks obsessed with what school I’d get into and my ticket out of here instead of facing what I know now: It’s going to be really hard to leave.

“Of course I will, you big dope,” I finally say.

He jumps up and down and runs circles around me. Then he gives me a huge bear hug and lifts me up in the air.

“Easy, easy,” I say, trying to pull away.

He punches me in the arm. “I’m so happy,” he says.

“I can see that.”

“I really hope she says yes.”

“I’m sure she will.”

“Really?”

“Yes,” I say. “She will.”

And God. For his sake, I’m hope I’m right.

Just as we’re leaving the park, Larry’s phone starts playing Jackie Chan singing “We Are Ready.” I really wish I was kidding.

“Heh-ay beautiful,” he says, beaming.
Arielle,
he mouths to me, like I couldn’t figure that out.

He walks over to an empty bench and sits down. I stand nearby to wait, but he motions for me to go on without him. I leave him in his state of bliss and head home.

When I get close to the apartment, I see Stella standing outside talking to
Britt.
He’s leaning against his freshly buffed BMW. It’s the sporty kind my dad calls a penis extender. Of course. Perfect boyfriend would have a perfect car. I comfort myself by thinking about my dad’s joke.

I stop walking and sit on the nearest stoop to wait for them to leave before
Britt
sees me. I hear Stella say something, but I can’t make out the words. Britt leans toward her and yells in her face.

She cowers and steps back.

What the hell? I get up and start walking toward them. Even from here, I can see that Britt’s hands are in fists.

“I wasn’t doing anything!” Stella says.

“Then why didn’t you return my texts!”

“I was busy! That’s all!”

He grabs her arm.

“Hey!” I yell, coming up to them. “Get off her.”

He turns to me. “Do I know you?”

Stella looks at me like she wants to kill me. What did
I
do?

“Let go of her. Now.”

Britt lets go, then steps closer to me.

“You’re the guy from her karate practices, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

He studies my face. “And you’re the freak who was spying on us the other day.”

Great.

“What?” Stella says, looking at me.

“I wasn’t spying,” I say. “I just —” I don’t know what to say. Whatever comes out of my mouth will sound completely lame.

“Stay away from us,” Britt says, like I really am some kind of stalker.

Stella is looking at me as if for the first time. And not in a curious way. More like a totally creeped-out kind of way.

“Stella has a boyfriend. Got it?”

“I know that. We’re just friends. Relax.”

“No one is just friends. Unless you’re a fag.”

“Are you kidding me?” This does not sound like the same Britt I’ve overheard laughing with his friends at school. This guy is the asshole I secretly hoped he’d be. But I never wanted him to hurt Stella. I just wanted her to dump him. I guess that makes me just as bad.

I glance at Stella again, because I honestly can’t believe she’d let him get away with saying this crap. But instead, she crosses her arms at her chest and glares at me like this is all my fault.

“Just stay away from her from now on,” Britt says.

“I told you. We’re just friends.”

“No. You’re not friends. You don’t talk to her.”

“What the hell?” I ask Stella.

“Go away, Josh,” she says.

“Wait. You’re really going to let him tell you who you can hang out with?”

She doesn’t answer.

Britt keeps glaring at me. His jaw clenches and unclenches.

“So this is who you were with when I tried to call,” Britt says. “The stalker. Unbelievable.”

“I was helping our karate instructor,” she says.

“Right.”

“We were helping him pick out an engagement ring for his
girlfriend.
”

“What did you need him for?” he asks, jerking his elbow toward me.

“He’s Larry’s nephew,” she says.

I hate how her voice sounds. All pleading in some “Please forgive me” way. And like I am just some throwaway loser who
happened
to be there, too.

“Just go home,” Stella says to me. “Please.”

Britt grabs her arm again. “C’mon. We’re leaving.” He starts to pull her toward the car. For a brief moment, Stella looks down at his hand, like she isn’t sure what to make of it holding her that way. She pulls away, but Britt grabs her back.

“Britt, cut it out,” she says.

“We’re getting out of here. Now.” He pulls harder, and she almost falls.

I feel rage build in my chest. Every cell in my body is saying to beat the crap out of this guy. When Stella tries to break free again and he seems to squeeze harder, I go for it.

All the karate moves I’ve learned and practiced for the past seven months go out the window, and I’m just grabbing the guy, pulling him away from Stella. He gets free, and before I know it’s coming, he punches me in the face. For a few seconds, I can’t see, the pain is so blinding. Then I punch back. I manage to block a few of his punches and then nail him in the stomach. He bends over and coughs, then straightens again. He looks like a bull about to charge. Stella is screaming at both of us. Then Larry appears out of nowhere, pulling Britt backward.

“What the hell is going on here?” Larry yells, holding Britt’s arms behind him. With his arms held away, exposing his chest and stomach, I have the supreme desire to kick him in the gut and put us all out of his misery. But Stella walks over to me and slaps me across my already bruised face. It hurts like hell.

“You asshole!” she says. She’s crying.

“Me?”
I say, trying to ignore the searing pain.

“Yes. You!” She strides over to Britt and Larry. “Let him go,” she says to Larry. He does.

Britt shakes out his arms as if he just broke free. Right.

Stella walks around to the passenger side of his car and gets in.

“You better hope I never see you around her again,” Britt says to me. “Freak.”

I have nothing to say to that.

Larry runs over to Stella’s side of the car. “Maybe you should stay here, honey,” he says. “Please.” But she just faces straight ahead, her arms crossed at her chest. Britt gets in the car and peels out of the parking space, down the street.

“Jesus, Sammy,” Larry says to me. “You’re bleeding.”

I feel my face. It’s sticky.

“Come on. Arielle’s on her way over. We decided to eat in. Let’s get you cleaned up before she has a heart attack seeing you like that.”