Liz Ireland (20 page)

That last thought troubled her the most. Because if her recollection was correct, he’d never uttered a word today about loving her, either this afternoon at his mother’s house or tonight after the fire. In fact, at Isabel’s she’d thought he was using her. Both times they’d been alone he’d only spoken of desire—and
how quickly, how eagerly, how recklessly she’d answered his call to arms!

Her cheeks burned with a fire that was no less hot because her audience was in a deep sleep. She felt mortified, and began snatching up her discarded clothes and donning them hurriedly. She’d lost a stocking—maybe Roy was lying on it. Whirling in a confused circle, she spotted her coat in a heap on the ground, scooped it up, and dashed toward the barn door.

Jonas, the old nag, was still waiting for her, and in her desperation she managed to heave herself up on him in only three tries. She dug her heels into his sides and nearly slipped off again when he bolted forward at a bone-rattling trot; every jounce was a painful reminder of what she’d just done.

The night was dark, and Ellie wasn’t even sure of where she was going. There was a path, and she was counting on Jonas’s steadiness to get her to town. Right now, as her thoughts spun in a confused, disappointed, heartsore whirl, she just knew where she didn’t want to be: in that barn when Roy awoke and his rueful expression revealed how big a mistake he thought he’d made.

E
llie slept sinfully late. Her whole body felt heavy and sore—unwelcome reminders of her activities of the night before. As if her dreams hadn’t been reminder enough! All night, visions of Roy had swirled through her mind. Roy laughing, Roy pulling her into his arms for a kiss. Roy making love to her.

That thought spurred her out of bed. She swung her legs over the edge of her mattress and dressed quickly after giving herself a brief wash from the basin in the corner. She felt unusually disoriented and tired, though she’d slept longer than usual.

Stepping out of the privacy of her curtained-off sleeping area and descending the narrow steps carefully, she immediately knew what had finally awakened her. Ed and Isabel were seated together by the fire, laughing as merrily as they had been when she’d finally come in the night before. When they heard her steps, they looked up and beamed at her.

“Good morning, Ellie!” They practically chirped in unison.

“Good morning,” she answered.

She wondered if they had slept at all, or had simply
stayed up talking the whole night. “I’m sorry I slept late,” she said quickly. “I know there’s work to do.”

Isabel jumped up, clapping her hands together. “Not today,” she announced happily. “Edward—” She gestured grandly toward him, preparing Ellie for something remarkable. “
My
Edward has asked me to marry him!”

Although Ed sat up taller, his face was tomato-red.

A smile broke out across Ellie’s face and she ran over to hug Isabel happily. “How wonderful! Although I can’t say I’m surprised….”

Not after seeing them together nonstop since the dance.

Isabel’s eyes widened. “Did you hear that, Ed? She’s not surprised, either. Only you were.”

He grinned sheepishly, though Ellie could tell he was the happiest man alive despite all the other things that had befallen him yesterday. It was remarkable that they could find happiness after a tragedy that would have devastated some.

“I’m still flabbergasted,” Edward admitted.

Isabel put her hands on her hips. “Why, you old bachelor, were you secretly hoping that I would say no and you’d be able to hold onto your solitude
and
to me?”

Though she teased him, he looked truly startled by her words, and reached out and grabbed her hands. “No, Izzy, I’m just surprised you’d have me because you’re too pretty for me, that’s why. Too pretty, too smart, too everything!”

Isabel laughed. “Not too modest, though. No one has you beat there.”

Ellie felt herself grinning like a schoolgirl as the two flirted, and she even blushed when Ed pulled Isabel onto his lap and pecked her on the cheek. Amazing that she could blush at anything so innocent as a
kiss after last night! But their happiness was so infectious that for a moment she was able to forget her own troubles and revel in their prenuptial bliss.

After a half hour with them, however, a new discomfort set in, especially when she picked up the pattern she had been sewing yesterday and found Isabel blinking at her impatiently.

“Don’t bother with that, Ellie. I’m too happy to work, and seeing you toiling away would just make me feel guilty.”

Ellie set the sewing aside and looked about her awkwardly. “Is there anything else you would like me to do today?”

“Why don’t you take the day to relax?” Isabel suggested. “Or go shopping.”

Isabel was truly a generous woman, she knew. But right now Ellie’s employer’s generosity wasn’t completely selfless. As she and Ed sat blinking at her impatiently, it was obvious that Ellie’s presence in the little house had suddenly become superfluous.

She cleared her throat. “Thank you. I would enjoy a day to myself to…” Her mind hunted for some activity she might use to occupy herself. “To shop, as you said. Or I might take a walk. Would you mind if I stayed out till this evening?”

The two of them looked as if they couldn’t have been more delighted. Ellie hurriedly readied herself for a day on her own, putting on her coat and hat and snatching up her reticule. She left the house in a hurry, too quickly to decide what she was really going to do with all this time she had promised them.

She headed for the mercantile, then turned her steps when she realized she was too exhausted to handle the calamities that might befall her there. She wished Parker had come for a visit this morning, and still half expected to see him.

But most of all, she wished Roy had come.

All during the slow ride from Ed’s farm into Paradise last night, she had expected to hear his wagon drive up behind her. But it hadn’t. And now as she walked through the town, she imagined him hunting her down to ask her where she had run off to last night. To tell her that he still loved her.

But that, too, was just a wishful illusion.

Tears stung her eyes when she remembered how happy she had felt last night, with so little to base that happiness on. Had she learned nothing from her eight-month ordeal? Another man had used her for his gratification, offering her no promises, and yet she had gone into his arms eagerly, accepting whatever crumbs he cared to give. She had given real love and had received not even empty words in return.

A queer, unbalanced sensation overtook her. She felt like running—yet she couldn’t have run if her life depended on it. Abruptly, her steps passed the Lalapalooza and turned off the sidewalk and onto the road out of town. She didn’t know where she was headed; all she knew was that she had to be alone. And if her footsteps took her a little closer to Roy…well, there was only one road, and he didn’t own it.

She placed one foot in front of the other, feeling better the farther she left the town behind her, and looked ahead to nothing but the fields of burnished brown. Oh, she did love this country—as much as she had on that first day when she’d arrived. She inhaled a deep breath of cool clean air and delighted in a small cluster of coppery haystacks standing sentry next to a rickety log fence. No matter what happened, she was glad she was here, where there was room to breath. Paradise might not be the utopia she’d hoped, but she had no doubt that her child would have a better chance here than where she was.

Her child.

After another quarter mile of walking, she suddenly felt very tired, and stepped off the road to sit down for a moment.

That was a mistake, she soon discovered. When she lay down, she suddenly realized how exhausted she was. And the soreness she felt didn’t seem to her a reminder of yesterday anymore, but a very real sensation of pain happening to her right now. Her abdomen cramped uncomfortably, and she leaned over, feeling a sudden flash of heat.

Then, when understanding dawned, a clammy wave washed over her and her mind froze in panic.

Dear Lord, no,
she thought. The baby couldn’t be on its way. It wasn’t time…it was too early.

And she was so very, very alone….

“Did you hear all the talk last night after the fire?” Ike asked as Roy sat bleary-eyed over a cold cup of coffee.

“No.” He’d slept the night in his uncle’s barn, then got up this morning to discover Ellie gone. When he’d returned to the house, he’d found Parker had disappeared.

Having his brother absent so suddenly made Roy uneasy, though he didn’t know why. Most of his thoughts had been so centered on Ellie, he could barely spare any mental room for Parker. Besides, Parker could take care of himself, while Ellie…

Why had she left him?

He could have kicked himself for passing out last night, but the fire had been so exhausting, and Ellie’s embrace so warm, so giving, that he’d simply gone out like a snuffed candle.

When he recalled his time with Ellie now, he felt almost in awe of her. She’d been so beautiful. He’d
never known that a woman with child could be so desirable, and yet remembering Ellie lying next to him, he couldn’t think of another woman he’d wanted as intensely.

“Well, believe you me, there was plenty of speculating about a McMillan marriage,” Ike continued, heedless of Roy’s distracted thoughts.

They didn’t remain distracted for long.

Roy’s weariness escaped him and the gaze he levelled on Ike was razor-sharp. “When?”

“Soon, I guess.” Ike shook his head in wonder. “Not to mention, you should have seen this ring Parker showed me. Real pretty thing. Had pearls and diamonds in it, shaped like a flower.”

His
ring? Parker had bought it?

Suddenly, he was seeing red. And not just because of Parker. Ellie, too!

Of course he’d known that Parker had been seeing Ellie in town every day. At first he tried not to care, then later when he realized that he did care, he’d hoped that Parker’s attentions to Ellie stemmed from kindness, not love. Certainly yesterday when he’d been with Ellie, both in the afternoon and after the fire, the subject of her and Parker had never arisen. If she loved Parker—enough to marry him—wouldn’t she have whispered some word to him of that fact?

Would she have allowed herself to be made love to by him if she were in love with his brother?

Why had she left him?
his mind repeated disturbingly.
What the heck was going on here?

Damn it, he shouldn’t have let her go last night—should have locked the barn or tied her down to the bed if necessary!

“Hey, where are you going, Roy?” Ike asked in astonishment.

He wasn’t the only one surprised. Roy was barely
conscious of having jumped up from the table and run for the door like a nervous hare.

“I’ll be back!” he thundered, before slamming the door behind him.

He saw the wagon standing where Ike had left it, jumped in, and grabbed up the reins. He didn’t know what in the world was going on around him, but he surely wasn’t going to let Ellie slip through his grasp now. Not after last night.

He drove the horses quickly and deliberately, his jaw set with fierce determination. He was going to march into his mother’s house and tell Ellie that she could just forget about trying to marry someone else. She had no right to be accepting rings from Parker or anyone else after last night!

Plans raced through his head. A preacher. That’s what he needed. He’d round one up somehow and drag Ellie through a wedding ceremony whether she was ready or not.

So intent was he on his plans for Ellie, he nearly didn’t see the figure on the side of the road as he passed. Only a glimpse of startling red hair made him pull up the reins.

He jumped off the wagon before it had stopped moving. His heart was racing as he saw her slumped form. He bent down and grabbed her by the shoulders. “Ellie, it’s me,” he said in a rush, “What’s happened?”

She was pale and tense and looked at him through eyes glazed with pain. “Roy?” Her voice was dry.

He swallowed. “Is it the baby?”

She nodded.

Without further ado, he swept her into his arms and carried her to the wagon. He took off his coat and put it down for her over a layer of straw that was already
there. Then he laid her carefully onto the makeshift bed.

Instinctively, he turned the horses toward home, returning as fast as he could. His thoughts were full of recriminations now, and regrets. It wasn’t time for the baby, and yet she was clearly in labor. Had their activities of the night before caused this, or her riding back home on her own? How long had she been there by the side of the road?

Occasionally, she would utter a soft moan behind him, breaking into his unproductive thoughts and spurring him to lap the reins against the horses’ backs to speed them.

At the house, he pulled the wagon up to the door and jumped down, calling for Ike. He carried Ellie into the house just as Ike was opening the door.

“What the…?”

“The baby!” Roy cried.

Ike’s eyes widened and his mouth gaped like an uncapped barrel. “What are we gonna do?”

“You’re going to town to fetch Dr. Webster,” he said. “I’m going to put Ellie in my room and try to find the medicine book.”

Ike nodded. “I’ll start boiling some water and get you some clean sheets before I go.”

Roy stopped in midstride and whirled on Ike even with Ellie in his arms. “What for?”

“That’s what Mama always said she did for my married sisters.”

Finally Ike’s mama was coming in handy! “You do that—and hurry.”

The trouble was going to be figuring out what to do with that stuff once Ike was gone. Roy didn’t know the first thing about how to help a woman giving birth—one of the drawbacks of being from a family of bachelors. For a fleeting moment he even considered
asking Ike to stay and going for Dr. Webster himself, but when he looked down at Ellie’s pale, drawn face he knew he couldn’t leave her.

“Hang in there, Ellie,” he said encouragingly, “Ike’s going for the doctor. He’ll be right back.”

Her brow puckered and she looked up at him. “The baby’s early, Roy.”

He nodded, feeling his stomach go knotty with the same fear that was written in her expression. He forced a tiny smile and said, “He’s just eager to see his mother. Can’t say as I blame him, since she’s so pretty.”

She laughed skeptically, then clamped down in pain for a moment. Roy tensed right along with her, and felt his skin go clammy. When she relaxed a little, he sat her up and began unbuttoning the back of her dress. “Let’s get you out of this.”

She seemed only too happy to go along with his suggestion. When the confining garment was off, she looked slightly more comfortable—enough to encourage him to do more than hold her hand. “You look exhausted already, Ellie. Do you think you could have some water?”

She nodded, and he ran to the kitchen to find the kettle steaming like a dragon atop the stove. He pulled it off the heat, grabbed a mug from the cupboard and ran out to the pump.

Ellie accepted the water gratefully, and Roy spent the rest of the time they were alone alternately giving her sips of liquid, wiping her brow, and running to the kitchen to look out for the doctor and make sure that the water remained boiling hot for such a time as it was ever needed.

His efforts paid off. Though the pain worsened, Ellie began to look a little more up to the task ahead,
and she was able to talk more easily, though some of her thoughts were disturbing.