Log 1 Matter | Antimatter (26 page)

Read Log 1 Matter | Antimatter Online

Authors: Selina Brown

Tags: #science fiction, #soft scifi, #soft science fiction, #fiction science fiction, #fiction science fiction military, #epic science fiction, #fiction science fiction books, #speculative science fiction

“Have fun?”

She nodded. But he understood why she was so
excited and fearful. As soon as he took her hand, she shared her
latest.

 

CARDINAL Unit 9 (CU) Cycle and
Logs

 

1117317627853882

Results from CU scan at
Matter/Antimatter +0.72

Total difference Matter/Antimatter
+0.22

MONITOR returned to date 57.7%
feasible data

PURE-GEN responsible

COLLATE data

COMPARE data

Prepare Chaos Unit and Proxy
Unit

End check

 

C. That’s a big increase from the last
one

Caleb looked worried.

C. 57.7%

“I know.”

C. That court meeting

A. Pure-Gen were responsible but what’s the
Chaos and Proxy Unit?

C. It’s not you!

They were standing still now and Ara
desperately needed contact. A distraction. Caleb touched her cheek
and took the opportunity to kiss her.

C. I have just the thing and, besides, we
look silly just standing here. We can secretly talk now

A. Hmmmmmmm

C. Or not

As they kissed, she moved her body against
his and he ran a hand under her hair. She moaned softly against
him. He pressed harder on her mouth, parting it, and closed his
eyes. Her arms came around him and he touched her breast, flicking
over the nipple. He was buzzing with lust; Ara’s term because she
considered “burning with lust” was cliché.

“Want to try Ph’bashra?”

They did, back in his rooms, and she didn’t
like it. So they resumed combinations of Al’kalay and
Fyr’Lahlia.

“Who came up with Ph’bashra anyway?”

“Some like it, Baby.”

“But, it’s hard doing two things at
once.”

He had doubled over laughing. “You only have
to do one thing, and enjoy the other.”

“Yes, but that’s my point. How can you relax
and enjoy it when you have to work and … and, well, there’s the
angle—”

“Work?” He tickled her then; only being a
little disappointed that she didn’t like it. They dressed and
walked slowly under the tree house where they used to meet as kids,
and into the forest, along the shaded path back to her bike. He
pulled her along to the stream instead to take a swim. Ara was
grateful he was prolonging their time together. She spotted a nice,
grassy place for some fun. After they went swimming and re-dressed,
she said, “We can try it again one day.”

He kissed her and then studied her with an
indecipherable look in his eyes but they were warm with emotion.
“Sure.” They were holding hands and facing each other.

“Thank you, Caleb. I don’t know who to turn
to or how I would cope without your support. Most people I know
have some obligation to care for me.” Ara sucked in her lips with
the pain she was feeling. But her family did love her, she knew
that. But Caleb had no obligations.

C. You know it

But did he love her?

“I’m here if you need me. And Terzon if I’m
not. Okay?”

She blew air from her cheeks, nerves
threatening to make her run away. “Okay. Caleb?”

He smiled his encouragement for her to
continue, his ice-green eyes were still warm, expectant. Shyness
engulfed her and she stammered, “I … um … I love you.”

Ara was sure tears had sprung in his eyes but
he hugged her so tightly and was laughing.

“I love you!” He released her and hollered
into the woods. “She loves me!” He swung her around and around as
they both laughed.

 

Mountain Installation

 

Jamie read Jesran’s report, “…still not
willing to face up to the inevitable. Moving in.” Jamie resented
his closeness to Ara. He hated the lie he decided. And then, with
uncharacteristic bitchiness, he thought, Better Jesran than me if
Ara found out Jesran’s getting closer was on for the mission. He
didn’t understand those feelings either. For years, he and Leo had
been dating, finding an ever-deepening attachment. Leo tried to
return to Saratoga when he could, while Jamie was determined to get
to Sparta Prime to visit. Plus he could go home to Lyon 3 as well.
Jamie lifted his ISVoice, an interstation comms device. “Leo?” The
ISV took only nine microseconds to transmit verbal signals.

“Jamie, I was just about to call you.”

“I was thinking about what we talked
about.”

There was a slight hesitation. Had he made a
mistake? But then Leo said, “About coming here?”

“If it’s a problem—”

“No! I’d love you to come. In fact, I was
getting up the nerve to ask you to meet my family.”

Joy surged through him. “Yes, I’d love
that.”

As they talked, both happy and laughing with
each other, Jamie knew he was hooked. For a moment, Jamie saw
another future for himself, but he was getting ahead of things. He
didn’t want to rush what might be his first serious
relationship.

 

Sub-Log XIX

 

Homestead

 

That night, Ara tossed and turned, so happy she had
told Caleb she loved him. Ever since they were little, she had
loved him. And he loved her. Warmth flooded her Sawol. For reasons
she didn’t understand, something or someone didn’t like that. Ara
didn’t know why. Why shouldn’t she love? Her dreams turned stranger
than usual. She sat bolt upright on Trickster’s bed, as if she had
never left it. Except she was in shorts and a t-shirt.
“Trickster?”

He came through the hatch patch door and
closed it with Ara missing the view behind because he was blocking
it with his near naked body.

“Good. I have something to show you.”

It was a good start. There were no
explosions, burnt bodies, or debris drifting from mangled ranger
parts. She got up and walked across the hut, but then sat down
being too close to Trickster’s warm body. She wiped the sweat from
under her nose. Tartly, she asked, “Will you put some clothes
on?”

He looked down at his body. “Does this
disturb you?”

“Ah, not disturb. Distract.”

Trickster hesitated for a moment and then
moved to a chest she hadn’t seen before because she’d been sitting
on it. “We have to change anyway.”

“Not another disaster!”

“No.” He pulled out two sets of clothes, long
pants, long sleeve tops, and soft shoes.

“Dress.”

She glanced around the room.

“No food.” He dressed and gave her a pointed
look.

Ara dressed, already sweltering, and pulled
down the top, feeling how soft the material was, when the portal
was already opening. “I was in trouble last time with Mum and
Dad.”

He frowned. “Why?”

“Because I was exhausted. I couldn’t get out
of bed except to shower and go back to sleep. I had to have a
medical examination.”

“I will be more careful next time.”

“Next time—”

He pushed her through the portal. “Do what I
do.”

She stumbled through and they were in a
storeroom, and Trickster was hiding behind some crates, waiting for
someone or something, and then led them out and around the back,
through a back entrance and then down a side alley. Ara ran her
hands over the stone wall to her left. “It’s odd … um… Trickster!”
She’d bumped into him.

He was peering around a corner.

Ahead Ara could see horses and carts and
people dressed in lots of clothes, with ruffles and strange… He
yanked her, and was climbing over a low metal fence with flowers.
Ara’s pants snagged and ripped, and she stumbled into a chair. Her
back was to the road and she tried to turn.

Trickster connected with her.
“Don’t move,
listen.”

Ara froze and tried to listen.

A. To what?

A male came over to them and Trickster was
relaxed. “Tea for two, please.”

Calmly, he placed what looked suspiciously
like money on the table. She leaned over and began to reach out to
study it when Trickster frowned at her.

T. Close your mouth and you shouldn’t use
the short ArT

He then said, to the waiter, “Apologies, kind
sir. My wife and I have come from the coast, our ship sunk—”

“My goodness, we heard about that.”

Ara smiled up at the male … servant.

T. He owns the café

A. You’re using it

T. What?

A. Short ArT

Ara gave Trickster the “look” hoping it said
how very annoyed she was at him but he ordered food and assured the
manager he could pay and, as soon as they recovered from the
ordeal, he hoped to find a reputable bank, accommodation, and
tailor.

“This is England, Earth 1600s.”

Ara almost squealed wanting to see more, to
brag to Bel and their friends, but was aware Trickster’s eyes were
hard. His eyes told Ara, “I’m going to be an intractable arse.”

Their tea and lunch were delivered and they
ate silently. Ara relaxed and became familiar with her
surroundings. She was aware of a strange energy. But something was
dampening the effect.


What do you feel?”

Ara closed her eyes.
“Energy, it’s so
strange.”

Trickster nodded slightly and sipped his tea.
“Keep trying to define it.”


It’s strong but fragmented somehow, if I
connect—”

T. No! You must not

Heart pounding at how loud his mental voice
had become, Ara had tensed. After several seconds of deep
breathing, she turned her attention to the table. She didn’t like
tea and would have preferred a good, strong coffee. On the bright
side, a decent grumble always helped her relax. Other than that, it
was a cool, overcast day, and Ara heard people walk and chat or
ride by behind her.


Are they still around, Feathers?”


I think so, but not close. They’ve been
coming here for over a hundred years.”
Trickster stood and
quickly disappeared around the corner. Annoyed, Ara sat for a
second longer and then followed, seeing him already going around
the corner at the end. She had to run and felt the power of the
portal already activate. As she rounded the bend she was shoved
inside and fell on the floor.

Trickster deactivated the portal and then
helped her up. “I’m sorry, Ara.”

She brushed herself off, exasperated with
him, and flicked off her shoes, took off her top and pants and
flung them aside. She sat on the bed and crossed her arms.

“I want to go home now.”

“I can’t make you go home.”

She lay down and closed her eyes, willing
herself to go to sleep but all the while hearing Trickster tidy up
her mess. Swearing, she sat up and crossed her legs. She couldn’t
bear it any longer. “Why were we there?”

“Because I’ve detected it before but cannot
track well. I think … it wants to hurt you. It may be your
enemy.”

She laughed but sensed he hedged for some
reason. A little seed of doubt crept in even as she said, “My
enemy! Sure.”

He glanced over at her and took off his own
clothes.

Ara frowned and averted her eyes. “Why are
they my enemy?”

“That I cannot say because I do not
understand it. I thought it was one thing but it was not.”

“You knew that they had been there?”

“It was chance that I found it. I wanted to
take you to Earth, to show you, to make it more real to you.”

He was being rather informative so she stood
and helped him fold the clothes. “If I felt them, or rather their
energy, they can do the same with me?”

“Yes.”

Ara felt a momentary thrill of fear thinking
of all the times she had felt the malignant touch. How could she
keep denying it? “Why?”

He stood helpless. “I cannot say. Something
was started and I was sent on a path. But then that path was
crossed with another path. I cannot go down that new path, not yet.
Ara, you must trust that I will when I can. And when I can I will
tell you.”

Wow, that was so clear. “Why can’t you go
down that other path?”

“Because I believe my path is more important
to the greater number.”

Ara swallowed hard. Again, she knew this had
something to do with her. No matter how much she wanted to deny it
or ignore it, she was going to have to face what it was. She
examined her life, seeing how the people she knew, loved, and
trusted were trying to nudge her to be more self-aware and alert.
In a sense, she was being ungrateful and at the least she should
allow herself to be nudged. At the moment she was still balking,
even reversing in her willingness to accept her role in life.

“Ara, are you alright?”

She nodded and glanced over at the
Quadrazaads. The problem was she was so afraid of being a part of
genocide, even unwillingly, that she couldn’t face it. Pain
threatened to engulf her every time she tried to think about it.
So, how could she do it alone? How could she burden Caleb?

“You are not alone, Ara Katron.”

“I’m alone inside.” Her words sounded a
little pathetic but she didn’t know how else to explain how she
felt.

Trickster lifted her chin and his face was
soft, his eyes wet with tears. “Yes, I see now. I understand.” He
hugged her tightly, and then released her. “What to do?”

Ara’s eyes moved to the Quadrazaads again. “I
think if I had the Strike I might be braver.” She flushed then. “I
know it’s not for me, but it likes me. That sounds a bit silly,
doesn’t it?” She dared to look at his face.

Trickster never smiled, but his face formed a
“smile” of sorts. “It is not good to use things as a crutch but
this is a good idea. They were made for a different purpose though
and I cannot give you the Strike … yet. But I can do something for
you.”

He walked over and opened the box. Ara saw
the Quadrazaads were bigger and brighter. He lifted out the Strike
and walked back to her. “Hold this and change your vision to see
energy.”

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