London Bound (6 page)

What the hell had she been thinking sleeping with him? She didn’t
do
things like this. And blaming the wine was complete bullshit, because she hadn’t been drunk. No, she’d been needy. Needy and desperate, and getting out of Nathan’s apartment as quickly as possible had been the right move, because she didn’t need to see judgment on his face the morning after. Or worse, pity.

Clenching her jaw, Meg quickly rinsed and got out of the shower. After drying off and slipping on her robe, she padded into the main room of the apartment and flopped onto the sofa. A glance at the clock decided her next move. It may be three AM in London, but back home, it was only nine PM. She needed some talking down. Badly.

She powered up her laptop then went about making the video chat call that would hopefully restore her sanity. Curling up on the cushion, she gnawed on her thumbnail and stared at the computer resting on the coffee table before her.

The picture went fuzzy a moment then her best friend’s grinning face filled the screen.

“Meg! Oh, my God, how are you? How’s the trip? What have been up to? Don’t worry; the kids are fine. They came over for dinner tonight and just left like half hour or so ago. Were you—” Caro stopped abruptly, leaned closer to the webcam, and frowned. “Oh, shit, what’s wrong?”

Meg laughed, though it sounded more like a choked sob to her ears. “Do I look that bad? That you automatically assume something’s wrong?”

“Well, let’s be honest, these things,” she pointed accusingly directly into the camera, “are flattering to
no one
, and I’ve known you pretty much my whole life, so I’m well versed in all of Megan Forester Stevens’ facial expressions. And the current one is...” She tapped her chin thoughtfully. “I think I’ve fucked up and don’t know what to do now. Did I get it? I did, didn’t I? I got it right.”

“Are you alone?” The last thing Meg needed was for Caro’s husband or kids to be hearing any of this.

“Yeah, I’m up in the bedroom, escaping movie night. It was the boys’ choice tonight, and I can’t handle the explosions and gunfire. Why? What happened, Meg?”

“I fucked up and don’t know what to do now?” she joked pathetically.

“Okay...” The picture went crazy a moment before Caro set her computer on the bed and settled in front of it. “Tell me what’s going on.”

Meg blew out a slow breath. “You know the guy I was telling about downstairs?”

“The dickhead? Yeah.” Her eyes widened. “Oh, has he been worse? What did he do? Did you fight, argue? You’re having to hide out in your apartment just to avoid the ass, aren’t you? Honey, you don’t have to do that. Just...go get a hotel somewhere instead. Fuck him.”

“God, I missed you. No, it’s nothing like that. He actually turned out to be pretty decent. Helped me fend off an idiot at the pub, and we talked a bit.” She closed her eyes and just blurted it out. “I slept with him.”

When only silence answered her declaration, she opened her eyes and was met with the image of Caro wide-eyed and gaping.

“I slept with him, Caro,” she whispered. “I don’t know what I was thinking. So stupid and impulsive and—”

“Shut up! Quit beating yourself up.” Caro narrowed her eyes. “How was it?”

“How was it? Are you kidding? I’m telling you I just had a one-night stand with some guy I don’t know, and you’re asking me how it was?”

“Yes, because I’m a damned good friend, and that’s what we do!” She threw her hands up in the air then sighed. “What are you freaking out about exactly? Was it that bad? So bad a repeat performance is out of the question, and you need to avoid him? Well, what I said before stands—forget the apartment and go get a hotel room somewhere. You can certainly afford it.”

“No, it wasn’t
bad
. Christ, Caro!” Meg scrubbed her palms over her face.

“Then, what? You got laid; that’s awesome. Why the freak out?” She sighed again. “Is this about Scott?”

Meg pressed her lips together and shook her head.

“Because if it is,” Caro continued, “that’s idiotic. He’s been gone a long time, honey. My brother loved you so much, and he sure as hell wouldn’t want you sitting around alone, avoiding relationships at any cost.”

“I’m not avoiding anything,” she protested. “And there’s a world of difference between pursing a relationship and having a one-night stand with the hot, way-younger neighbor.”

“Hmmm. How hot, and how much younger? Paint me a picture.”

Meg laughed, even though the panic still raced through her mind.

“He’s blond, built, knows what he’s doing. And I don’t know how much younger. God, I don’t know...” she whined.

“So long as he’s legal, sister, all’s good.”

“Of course he’s legal! He’s not
that
young, just
younger
.” She sat back, defeated. “He was so rude before, but last night, he was so sweet and funny and...perfect. He listened and seemed to care. What if all that was just an act? To get into my pants? To score with the older woman who was probably a sure thing?”

“Meg.”

“What?” She didn’t care for the censure in her friend’s voice. “It’s possible.”

“You said he was hot, so why would he have to settle for the sure thing?
Your words
!” she reminded loudly when Meg opened her mouth to protest. “Besides, that’s not what you’re worried about, what you’re upset about.”

Meg shook her head. “You’re supposed to be talking me down, right now. I call you after doing something stupid, and you talk me down. That’s your duty as my best friend.”

“Oh, I’ll talk you down, all right, once we get to the
real
problem.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“It was good.
Really
good.” Caro’s brow lifted. “Better than with Scott, and you’re feeling guilty about that.”

“It wasn’t better!” Meg clamped her mouth shut, cringing at how loudly the words echoed in the small space.

“Meg, honey—”

“It wasn’t better,” she repeated firmly. “It was...different. More intense, maybe, but
not
better.”

“Okay, definitely not better.” Caro nodded. “But you are feeling guilty, aren’t you?”

Meg blinked rapidly as her eyes burned. “I know it’s stupid, okay? It’s been years; it’s not like I’m cheating on him. I
know
that. It’s not guilt, really, because I know I don’t have anything to feel guilty about.”

“But this is the first time you’ve let yourself be with someone,” Caro pointed out. “After Scott died, you focused everything on Aaron and Emily, and never tried to move on. At least, not in that aspect. So, a little freak out, now that it’s happened, is natural, don’t you think?”

“I guess.”

“As long as that’s what it is—a
little
freak out,” Caro said sternly. “You cannot obsess over this, Meg. You haven’t done anything wrong. Hiding away in that apartment until it’s time to come home isn’t an option. I’m dead serious. If you need to go to a hotel to enjoy the rest of your trip, then do it. On the other hand, if he was that good, and you want another round, and you think Mr. Hunky Neighbor would like to engage in such activities again...” She wiggled her eyebrows.

Meg’s stomach flipped at the thought of being with Nathan again, and she tried to school her expression—and failed miserably, she realized when her friend squealed and clapped her hands.

“Look at that blush...and you’re squirming! You do want to go again with him, don’t you?
Niiiice
.”

“Doesn’t matter what I want,” Meg protested tightly. “It was a one-time thing, and I got out of there as quickly as I could, so I’d say the chance of a repeat performance is slim...closer to none.”

“You ran out? Oh, Meg.” Caro sighed, disappointment rife in her voice.

“What was I supposed to do? Wait until morning for him push me out the door? No, thank you.”

“I think you’re underestimating him and yourself.”

“You don’t even know him. I don’t know him.”

“But I know
you
. If you took a chance on him, he can’t be too bad. He must be smart enough to realize what a beautiful, intelligent, amazing woman he had the privilege to take home last night.”

Meg snorted. “You
have
to say that; you’re my best friend.”

“Doesn’t make it any less true.” Her gaze focused on something beyond the computer screen, and Meg heard the murmur of another voice in the distance. “I’ll be right down.” She looked at Meg, exasperated. “So much for hiding out.”

“Bad luck.” She laughed. “Go, be with your family, honey. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“I can stay on a bit longer if you need...”

“No,” Meg said quickly. “I’m going to try to get a few hours of sleep then do the tourist thing. Emily’s counting on pictures.”

“All right. Sleep well, honey. Just...just promise me something?”

“What’s that?”

“Promise that you’ll enjoy yourself. If that means indulging in a scorching hot fling while on vacation, embrace it. This trip is supposed to be about you.”

“I hardly think that’s what the kids had in mind when they bought be the tickets.” Meg laughed.

“Hardly their business,” Caro countered. “So long as you get pics of the sights, no reason they have to know what other British delights you’ve been sampling. Although,
I’d
like a full report of all the loving. Another best friend duty, I’ll remind you.”

“Duly noted. And, I promise, I’ll enjoy myself.”

“With the neighbor?”

“No! Not promising that.”

“Spoilsport.” Caro laughed. “Go on to sleep, then. Call soon. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

After disconnecting, Meg went into the bathroom to comb the tangles out of her damp hair. Staring at her reflection, she wondered what Nathan saw when he looked at her. She wasn’t hideous, by any means; she would even go as far as saying she was pretty. But he was so damned gorgeous and funny and likeable and could have any woman he wanted.

“You’re ridiculous,” she said aloud.

She knew damned well she had a lot to offer a man and had never doubted that before. Why she was having self-confidence issues now was anyone’s guess. Though, Caro was probably right—this was the first man Meg had been with since Scott, so freaking out was just a part of the process. Not that she’d admit that to her friend. The bitch would never let Meg hear the end of it. Laughing, she set down the comb and finished getting ready for bed.

Sliding between the sheets, she catalogued the aches in her body. The delicious little hurts that came from being thoroughly fucked and taken care of. Would it be so difficult? To be with Nathan for the duration of her vacation. To just enjoy being with him without obsessing about anything beyond. Could she do that?

All of that was moot, really, because she couldn’t imagine Nathan would be beating down her door any time soon—not after she’d snuck out like that.

Better she just push him from her mind. She sighed and burrowed farther into the pillow. And that was a whole lot easier said than done. Damn it.

A couple hours later, not a single second of sleep to be had, she dragged herself out of bed. After getting dressed and forcing down some breakfast, she grabbed her purse and headed out for the day, determined to focus on what this trip was really about. She was fine on her own, had been for a long time, and the people in her life needed to see that.

If her stride faltered slightly outside Nathan’s door, if she missed her stop on the Tube more than once that day because her mind had wandered to the night before...that wasn’t something she had to share with anyone.

When she came home that night, exhausted and stumbling, she hurried up the steps as quietly as possible. Mentally, she cursed herself. It wasn’t as if the man would be listening for some sign of her return. He likely was out with friends or in bed and had no clue she’d even left for— She froze on the landing outside her flat and stared at the folded sheet of paper taped to the door. With trembling fingers, she pulled it down and opened it.

Hello, love,

How sad to wake up alone this morning. I hope all is well, and you aren’t having regrets. I have none, and would be lying if I said I didn’t want to continue what we started last night.

But, the next step is yours, and I’ll gladly fill whatever role you choose to assign me—the neighbor you say hello to in passing, a friend to share a drink and conversation with...or more. Just, please, don’t feel as if you have to avoid me during your holiday, Meg.

You know where to find me.

N.

Meg released the breath she’d been holding in a rush and pressed a hand to her belly. He’d come looking for her, after all. Fumbling the keys from her purse, she let herself into the apartment and deposited her things next to the door. She sat on the edge of the bed and read the note again.

Shit, she didn’t know what to do. She knew what she
wanted
to do—go downstairs that minute and jump the man. Just the thought had warmth blooming in her belly. Shaking her head, she set the note beside her and started to get ready for bed.

It was late. Tomorrow was soon enough to make her decision, after a good night’s sleep and taking some time to think it over.

Feeling like a teenager, she placed the paper on the other pillow when she climbed into bed for the night. Lying in the dark, staring up at the ceiling, she weighed all the pros and cons of getting involved with Nathan. Thought through the different scenarios and various outcomes that could happen.

Basically pretending she hadn’t already made her decision the moment she’d read his note.

“W
ell, you look like shit, friend.”

Nathan sent Georgia a two-fingered salute as he settled heavily on the barstool. She just laughed and got him a pint. He accepted it gratefully, draining half the glass in one go. Christ, he was exhausted. He’d been in the damned office the last two fucking days, completely out of his depth dealing with R&D issues his sister normally handled. That was
her
area, not his. Lara could hardly be blamed, though, as she was in the States with their youngest sister. Which was where he’d been until last week—cleaning up Maddie’s latest mess.