Lord Runthorne's Dilemma: A Regency Romance (14 page)

Elizabeth stretched her arms over her head, luxuriating in the privacy. She had not been alone, at least whist she was awake, since she had fallen ill. Her arms felt heavy and she lowered them into her lap and gazed out of the window. The sunshine was bright and it fell warmly onto her face. She leaned forward and, with a little difficulty, managed to open the window.

The scent of summer flooded into the room, chasing out the reminder of illness.
Elizabeth smiled, it felt as though a weight was lifted from her chest and she breathed deeply. A small bird flew out from the ivy, startling her. She laughed and lay back in her chair and closed her eyes, listening to the gentle sounds of the summer day.

A bird called in the distance. Close by a bee buzzed. Elizabeth frowned.
There were footsteps under her window. Pacing, ten steps, pausing, the grating of a foot turning, then pacing again a further ten steps. Again the turn. Curious, Elizabeth opened her eyes and levered herself to her feet. The rug fell unnoticed to the floor. She peered out of the window.

It was
Lord Runthorne. His head was bowed, as though he was troubled. Elizabeth bit her lip. Whilst she had been confined to bed she had had ample time to think. Her thoughts had not pleased her. Her behaviour had been unforgivable and her conscience had not spared her.

He
deserves to know the truth, even if it means humiliation for you
.

You
owe him that
.

Elizabeth sighed. She
needed to speak to him. Her hand hovered over the bell. Then she hesitated. Simpson was her aunt’s maid and Elizabeth did not think she could rely on her discretion. She glanced out of the window again. He was still there.

The wardrobe seemed a mile
away but Elizabeth was determined. Step, by hesitant step, she crossed the room, her hand resting on the furniture for balance. Finally, shaking with the effort, she reached the wardrobe and paused and waited for the room to stop spinning. After a moment she managed to fumble the door open and forced herself to calm down.

Lord
Runthorne would still be there. He had to be. She pulled out an old gown. It was not pretty, but it was modest, which was more than could be said for her shift.

It took longer th
an Elizabeth wished, but at last all the buttons were fastened. She felt stronger now, as though the very act of moving was aiding her recovery. However, she felt dressing her hair was beyond her. Instead she left it in the long plait she had worn whilst ill just pushing a few stray strands behind her ears.

Elizabeth
listened at her door for a moment. She did not hear anything. The door eased open silently and Elizabeth trod down the hall, one hand against the wall to support her. Now she could hear Simpson in another room, singing a psalm softly and a little off-key.

Ahead, half hidden in an odd angle of the wall, there was a small servants
’ door. Elizabeth opened it and, with a glance over her shoulder, slipped through.

Only when the door closed behind her did
Elizabeth pause and take a breath. She was a little dizzy now and had to lean for a moment against the undressed brick wall. Dust rose and tickled her nose, making her sneeze.

Stone steps curved downwards and, placing her feet carefully,
Elizabeth followed them. At the bottom a corridor led away to the left towards the kitchens. Elizabeth ignored it. A door in front of her gave her access to the terrace under her bedroom window. Above her, hidden in the ivy, a bird trilled.

“
Lord Runthorne.”

He turned, his face startled.
“Elizabeth. What are you doing out here?” He walked towards her and his nearness seemed to envelope Elizabeth in warmth, comforting her as nothing else could.

She put out her hand to ward him off
. She could not think clearly if he was too close. But he took her hand, leading her to a low stone bench.

“
You cannot be well enough to be out of your room.” His tone was chiding, concerned and Elizabeth’s lips twitched. She ducked her head, hiding it.

“
I must speak to you.”

“
I thought you were.” Now he sounded amused, but she sensed a strain beneath his banter.

“
My lord, please.” Her hand was still in his and it took all her strength of will to take it back. “I am serious.”

“
Elizabeth, I would consider it a great favour if, between ourselves at least, you would call me James like you used to.”

“
It would not be proper.”

“
Yet it would make me happy.”

Elizabeth
stared out over the lawn. It was browning under the heat of the sun, nothing to draw the eye, but she kept her eyes fixed. She did not want to even glance at him, to see the look of amusement fade to be replaced by embarrassment.

Elizabeth licked her lips. Now the moment had arrived, she could not find the words.

“
Elizabeth, what is the matter?”

The warmth of his voice eased the pressure in her throat.
“I am sorry, my lord, I have done you a terrible disservice. I should have told you the truth when you asked me why I had jilted you.”

He went completely still next to her, almost as though he did not dare to breath.

“I could not marry you, because I loved you. There,” she laughed a touch hysterically, “I have said it. How foolish it sounds. But, nevertheless, it is the truth.”

“
I do not think I understand, Elizabeth. If you loved me, why not marry me?”

Elizabeth
sighed. “Nothing would have made me happier. Had I thought you loved me in return.” Now she forced herself to look at him, expecting him to be mortified, but he seemed puzzled. Elizabeth bit her lip.

“
Lord Runthorne-”

“
James.”

Elizabeth
ducked her head. “Very well, James,” she said. “The evening before we were to marry, Lady Delphine came to see me. She told me that you did not care for me, that you were marrying me for my money.” Elizabeth shook her head, giving herself a moment.

“
I did not want to believe her,” she continued after a moment. “I argued with her, but I feared she was right. I could not spend the rest of my life with you, knowing that you did not care for me.” Above them, the song bird trilled again, mocking her.

He
took her hand, stroking her fingers as though he handled a rare and shy animal. “Foolish Elizabeth, you should have come to me. How could you believe her?”

“
How could I not? Apart from my money, I had nothing. I have eyes in my head and my mirror tells me that my appearance is no more than passable.”

She blinked, startled, as he cupped her cheek with one hand.
“Elizabeth, trust me when I say that I would never have asked you to marry me if I did not love you.

“
Love must, in short,

Keep fond and true,

Thro' good report,

And evil too.
”

“Do not reprove me with that song. You say you loved me. Well, you are betrothed to Miss Lacey now, do you love her?”

Lord
Runthorne’s hand dropped away, as though she had stung him. Suddenly, he also seemed to find the view enthralling.

“
No, Elizabeth, I do not,” he said, finally. “Aurelia was a mistake and I was an idiot. I should never have become betrothed to her.” He glanced back at Elizabeth and gave her a sad smile. “But I have to have an heir, you see, and as the one woman I cared for had spurned me, it no longer seemed to matter who I married.”

Gazing deep into his eyes, Elizabeth believed him.

“I am sorry, James,” she whispered.

“
I know.”

The song bird fell silent
and Elizabeth felt as though her heart would break.

A
gain.

She
shook her head. “And yet, you are still betrothed to her,” she said, after a moment. “She will not release you. Lady Delphine would never permit it.”

He
cradled her face again and leaned his forehead against hers. He was so close she could see each individual lash around his eyes. There was the faint dusting of freckles across his nose that she remembered so well and fine care lines that she had not seen before. Her heart ached for every one of them.

“You said you loved me then, Elizabeth. Tell me, honestly, do you still?”

“
You know I do.”

She felt his lips smile
and saw the sorrow fade a little from his eyes. “Yes, I do,” he said, “but I needed to hear you say it.” He stroked her temples tenderly. “Listen to me, now, my darling Elizabeth, I swear to you that I will find a way. We will be together.”

Then his lips
touched hers and her heart sang.

***

It took all of Elizabeth’s willpower to drag herself away from him. It seemed as though they had spoken for hours, yet the sun had barely moved in the clear summer sky.

“
Elizabeth,” he said, still holding her hand. “Please trust me, everything will come out well.”

Elizabeth
touched her free fingers to her lips. “I know, James.”

They
would
be together.

She hummed under her breath as she mounted the spiral stairs and entered the corridor leading to her room.

“Whatever are you doing?” Simpson, her arms crossed, blocked Elizabeth’s way. “You should be in your room.”

“
I am going there now,” Elizabeth said.

“
You should never have left. Does not the Good Book tell us to honour our Father and Mother and do not the Captain and Mrs Maybourne stand in place of them? May they Rest In Peace. Whatever will I say if you should fall ill again?”

Elizabeth
laughed. “You do not have to tell them.”

Simpson
sucked in a shocked breath. “Well, I have never heard such wickedness. How could you suggest I keep a secret from my mistress? May the Lord forgive you. What has come over you?”

“
Simpson, I just needed to walk a little,” Elizabeth said, taking pity on the irate maid. “I have been caged in that room for too long.”

“
Well, it is time you were back there.”

“
Unfortunately, you are blocking my path.”

The maid
bristled. She opened and closed her mouth, apparently searching for something to say then she stood aside. “I shall speak to your aunt,” Simpson said.

Elizabeth
smiled. Nothing worried her now. She felt invincible, confident in his love.

The bedroom door swung open at her touch.

“Well, madam, what do you think you are playing at?”

“
Lady Delphine,” she said.

“
Is that all you can say?” Lady Delphine rose, magnificently, from the armchair by the window. “I am shocked by your disgraceful behaviour, Elizabeth Hampton.”

Elizabeth
breathed deeply. “What brought you here, Lady Delphine?”

“
I
came
to see how you were,” Lady Delphine said. “I
stayed
when I overheard your pretty assignation with Lord Runthorne. I have never been so disgusted in my life. Do I have to remind you that he is betrothed to my daughter?”

Elizabeth
lifted her chin. “I should like you to leave.”

“
Oh no, my girl, I am not going to leave until I have given you a piece of my mind. There is a name for women like you.”

“
And what, exactly, would that be?”

“
I am sure I am too much of a lady to say it.”

“
I love him and he loves me.”

Blood rose alarmingly in Lady Delphine
’s face. “You stupid girl, what has that to say to anything. He is to marry Aurelia.”

“
Miss Lacey cares nothing for Lord Runthorne, she told me so herself.”

Lady Delphine
laughed and sank back into the chair. “Elizabeth, Elizabeth, Elizabeth, please do not be so naïve. Nobody marries for love. Not if they have any sense.” Her mouth twisted. “Aurelia is a sensible girl and understands how the world works. Unlike you.

“
Marriage is for connections, consolidating wealth and land, for getting heirs.

“
Those who want love,” again there was a strange twist of her lips, “search outside the marriage. Now you just be a good girl and marry Captain Fitzalan. It will save us all a great deal of trouble in the end.” She rose to her feet, the conversation at an end.

Now
Elizabeth gasped. “Please let me be clear about this, Lady Delphine,” she said. “You are determined to marry your daughter to Lord Runthorne when you know for a fact that she does not love him any more than he loves her”