Losing Me, Finding You (23 page)

I practically tear my boots and pants off in my frenzy to touch him.
I can't wait.

“Panties,” he commands me, and I pause. Being pants-less in the middle of the road is one thing, but being pantie-less is quite another altogether.

“Austin … ” He grins at me and reaches down, unzipping his own pants. My gaze follows his hands involuntarily, mesmerizing me.

“Better hurry before somebody comes along and we get interrupted.”

I swallow and look around, listening for the rumble of cars in the distance and hear nothing except for the droning of the cicadas. I drop my panties to my feet before I can stop myself and kick them next to my jeans.

“Now, get on the fucking bike,” Austin leans back and flashes me his cock, hard and ready and waiting. I move forward and climb on so that I'm facing him, trying to move slowly so that I don't seem too eager. Truth is, I am eager, almost desperate for it. Three days ago, I was a virgin reading about my favorite heroines being banged in black and white. Today, I am the heroine, and I can't wait for my turn. “Now, look at you,” Austin says, voice dropping into this lengthy Southern drawl where every fucking syllable is a nightmare of sexual tension, bleeding across my body and making me crazy for it. “Your perverted, little whore.”

“Fuck you,” I whisper, and despite the fact that I'm practically naked, straddling a motorcycle in the middle of nowhere, I blush at the vulgarity that pops out of my mouth. Who knew I had it in me? “Don't talk to me like that.”

“Why not?” Austin asks, taking my face in his hands and bringing my mouth to his for a kiss. “When you like it so damn much.” He reaches down and grabs me by the hips, pulling my pelvis forward, so he can press himself against me. The breath leaves my body in a rush, making me light-headed and dizzy.

I lean back against the handlebars and look down at the piercing in his cock, wondering if it will feel any different without a condom. Austin doesn't give me time to think about it, groaning and pushing himself into me, splitting me open with hot, hot heat and making my whole body ache with need.

I don't know if it's the Southern sun on our skin or the blistering heat of the still air, but I swear, Austin feels a hundred times warmer inside of me. I writhe in agony, certain that he's burning me up from the inside out, searing me with his cock. And as promised, I do feel the steel against my insides, rubbing along the length of my pussy with each thrust of Austin's hips.

My slick wetness coats him as sweat continues to drip down our bodies, making me feel dirty, disgusting and perverted. The worst part is, I love
every
single second of it.

“Come inside of me,” I whisper, surprised that those words are actually coming out of my own mouth. Austin laughs, but he doesn't stop, sliding his sweaty hands up my shirt and freeing my breasts from their bra, caressing them roughly and exposing them to the sunshine. I try to focus on the tattoo in the center of his chest, but my gaze keeps getting drawn between us to that spot where our bodies meet.

“I will, baby, I promise, but slow down, enjoy yourself.” I want to scream at him that I can't. I can't enjoy myself when I'm all wound up and full of tension like this. I let my head fall back and try to remember to breathe.
If you don't breathe, you die, but goodness me, is there a better way to go?

“Austin,” I whisper. “Austin, Austin, Austin.” I can't stop saying it. It's like my voice is no longer my own, consumed by the thrills of pleasure that are spiraling through my body and blinding me.

“Goddamn, Cross,” he whispers, sliding his hands back down my sides. “You're going to spoil me rotten. This feels so friggin' good.
You
feel so fucking good.” I grab onto the sides of the bike and find that I'm frozen, that I can no longer move, paralyzed by the feeling of Austin's body inside of mine.

After what seems like an eternity trapped between heaven and hell, Austin begins to groan, pumping faster and faster and faster until he's throwing his head back and spilling himself inside of me. I scream so loud that my voice echoes around the empty countryside and I collapse forward into the strong, sweaty arms of the world's sexiest biker.

I take Amy back to the hotel and we climb into bed. It might be the middle of the Goddamn afternoon, but that doesn't mean shit to me. I can't resist another go at that beautiful body. Cross has curves for days, and I can't think of anything better than riding her until the fuckin' sun goes down.

We don't even talk. I just roll on top of Amy and slide inside of her. She is friggin' drenched, and it takes me a lot less time than it should to come again, spilling my seed inside her heat. I cannot even begin to say how damn good that feels, grinding against Amy's bare body and coming away wet with her. Somehow, I'm now hyper aware of her, too, like she belongs to me and she's on my radar now. I can't say how or why it's happenin', but it started on the back of that damn motorcycle, and it doesn't seem to be letting up. If anything, it's gettin' worse by the minute.
Shit. Guess I forgot how nice it was to bang bareback. Damn you, Amy Cross, but I may never use another rubber for as long as I live.

After we finish, I roll off and hold Amy in my arms, listening to her breathing as it slows and she finally falls asleep. Fuck if I'll be able to drift off now that I'm feeling like this. There's some primal instinct bullshit goin' on that's making me antsy. As soon as I finished inside of her on the back of that bike, I felt like she was
mine,
completely and wholly.

I both love and hate that shit.

Unable to sit still, I force my tired ass out of bed and throw on some clothes, stepping out the door quiet as I can and stomping down the hall to Mireya's room. Somehow, she knows I'm there before I even get the chance to knock.

“I've been expecting you,” she coos as she steps away and ushers me in, wearing nothing but a lacy corset and some panties. The whole damn room smells like sex, and there's even a man's shirt lying across the back of one of the chairs. I freeze as soon as I hear the shower switch on.

“What the fuck are you doing?” I ask her, but she doesn't respond, instead skipping over to the bed and smoothing out the blankets, patting the orange comforter like she wants me to sit down. Mireya's eyes flicker up to mine and sparkle, like she can tell I'm pissed off and likes it. Unfortunately, it's not what she thinks. I'm not ticked off because she slept with someone; I'm ticked off because she slept with
Gaine.
He's the only asshole I know who wears a shirt with such a stupid ass saying.
Current Mood: Possessed.
That's his alright.

“What? You get to cart around your very own piece of ass, and I can't even indulge in what's already here?” I roll my eyes to the ceiling and take a big ass breath, pulling in the scent of Mireya's perfume. This time, though, even the sight and smell of her doesn't excite me. My mind just keeps spinning on this continuous loop, going back to Amy again and again and again. Maybe I should borrow that damn shirt because it sure as shit feels like the girl's possessed me. What worries me is that I don't even know her yet. What happens when I do? Am I going to lose my damn mind?

“Cut the crap, Sawyer. I meant, what the fuck are you doing to Gaine?” She shrugs and leans back, crossing her long, bronze legs at the ankle. A sultry smile tickles her full lips.

“It's just a fuck, Austin. Get over yourself. Isn't that what Amy is to you?” I ignore the question and pray that I can get myself out of there before Gaine comes out and sees me. Plus, I don't have any real desire to see the asshole naked. Might scar me for life.

“If you're trying to punish me, Mireya, it isn't working.” She narrows her eyes and pouts out her lips.

“Punish you? God, Austin, get over yourself. This isn't about you.”

“Amy then?” I ask, raising my chin. “Is this about Amy? What did she do to make you hate her so much?” Mireya shakes her head and scoffs.

“Amy? Who the hell cares about fucking Amy!” She screams this last part, and I can tell that there's at least one person that does – and that's her. She really, really does.

“So you did it, didn't you?” I don't even know why I'm asking. It's pretty obvious from where I stand that Mireya sent the video to Amy's family. Why she did it, I can't even guess.

Mireya stands back up and tosses her crow-black hair over one ear.

“Did what?”

“The video, Sawyer.” I slap the back of my right hand against the palm of my left. “The one that got Amy kicked out of her house, the one that practically forced me to take her in.” As soon as I say those words, I know they aren't really true. I mean, I guess if you looked at it from the outside, it might seem that way, but I don't feel forced with Amy, not even a little bit. I think I like her. A lot. “Did. You. Send. It?”

Mireya moves across the carpet like a panther, sleek and dangerous and powerful. She's a strong, beautiful woman with a lot to offer, but I'm not in love with her. I love her the same way I do Beck and Gaine and Kimmi – as a friend. Maybe she just isn't getting that? I always thought she did, but then, I guess I never stopped to notice that glint in her eye when she looks at me, the way she smiles, the way she softens her brow when I touch her.
Fuck.

When she stops next to me and slides her hands up my chest, I can see the regret in her eyes. I guess it's probably got more to do with the fact that Amy is here rather than at any guilt she might have for sending the damn thing, but at least it's there. It proves to me that she's a good person inside, just like I always thought she was.

“Austin, I sent it.” Mireya pauses and nibbles her lip. We both jump a little when the sound of the shower stops. “I sent it because I … I didn't want to lose you.”
Shit.
I try to take a step back, but Mireya's got her fingers wrapped in the fabric of my shirt.

“Don't go there, Sawyer. Just don't.”

“I fucking love you, Austin!” she screams, standing up on her tiptoes and forcing her lips against mine. When I don't respond, she pulls away and lets out a guttural growl that draws Gaine from the bathroom in an angry flurry. When he sees me, he just stops and covers his junk with his hands. I barely look at him. “I've … I've loved you forever. Why can't you see that?”

“Mireya … ” I start, but she isn't listening. She's pacing the floor now.

“Is it this little white bitch? Do you love her?”

Mireya stops and stares at me, and I've got nothin' comforting to say except, “Not yet.” She scoffs at me.

“Not yet? Not fucking
yet?
Well, how long does it take, Austin, because you and I have been together for ten years and you don't love me. Why is this girl any different?” I have nothing to say to that, so I keep my damn mouth shut.

“Maybe you should go,” Gaine tells me gently, putting a hand on my shoulder. I shrug it off. This is between me and Mireya, and I don't like anybody,
anybody,
butting in to my business.

“Mireya, try to calm down.”

She whirls to face me, eyes burning with fury.

“Out,” she snarls, spitting on the floor and not caring that we're indoors. “Out, out, get out and don't ever come back. Go run back to your new bitch.
If
you manage to come back to your senses, come find me. Until then, I don't even want to see your friggin' face.”

When I finally wake, the sky is pale and the light is weak.
It's morning.
I sit up when I notice that Austin is gone and wrap my arms around my bare chest. I can feel a phantom warmth along my skin, like maybe he slept alongside me for most of the night. I smile and close my eyes against a flood of images.
I can't believe I had sex on the back of a motorcycle. In the middle of the country. With no condom.
I shiver and reach a hand between my legs. It's still moist there, like my body can't get enough of Austin and wants to be ready for him. Or maybe that's his seed, spilling out of me, I'm not sure. What I do know is how good it felt to have him bursting inside of me, filling me.

I fling my feet out of bed to break the thoughts off, certain that I'll never be able to function if I keep imagining Austin and me tangling together in the heat of the afternoon. As soon as I put my full weight on my legs, they start to quiver and I have to put a hand out on the wall to steady myself.
Wow. Thank you, Austin Sparks,
I think as I force my aching body towards the bathroom. Going from virgin to … nympho in a few, short days has made me so sore down there that it pulses when I move. Which in turn makes me horny. Which in turn makes me think about Austin … I shake my head and pause when I see a note taped to the door of the bathroom.