Authors: Multiple
He
did. My name slipped out of his lips like a liturgy during Sunday mass.
"Sadie," he said, grinning. "It's nice to meet you. I'm
Evan."
I
wasn't crying anymore, merely staring at him with rapt fascination. The hand
he'd used to wipe away my tears reached out. I accepted it, shook it, and held
it tight, not wanting to let go. I did, though, I let him go. Bright tingles
of warmth tickled through my fingertips and fingers, centered in my palm, so
delightful.
"Do
you want to come sit with me?" he asked.
I
nodded, having no idea what to say to him.
"Would
you mind, um...?"
I
still held his other hand against my face, reveling in his warmth. He gently
moved his fingertips, caressing my cheek.
"Oh,"
I said. "Oh, I'm sorry." Reluctantly, I let him go.
He
took my hand, though; he didn’t let me go completely. I held his hand as he
led me towards his spot in the library. At that moment, I thought I would have
followed him anywhere if only he kept holding me. The glimmering afterglow of
his hand against my cheek felt magnificent, and the constant, cozy warmth of
his hand holding mine was pure bliss.
We
sat. He helped me into a chair and then he sat in the one next to me.
"You're
cold," he said.
I
frowned. "I know. I don't mean to be. I hope it's alright."
"No,
no." He shook his head. "I just... I don't know why I said that.
Does it hurt?"
"Does
what hurt?" I asked. I felt lightheaded and happy, despite the fact he
wasn't touching me anymore. His lingering warmth kept me feeling nice, like
I'd just eaten half a can of molten hot soup and settled into my bed back home
with my book.
"Well,
I'm warm and you're cold. Was my hand too hot? You looked--"
"No!"
I said in a panic. "No, no. Oh God, no. You... um..."
He
smiled and scooted his chair closer to me, right next to mine.
"What?" he asked. "You can say it. It's alright."
He
touched me again. Both his hands reached for one of mine and he held my hand
loosely in his own. I relished it and my eyes rolled into the back of my
head. My body felt near orgasmic, alive, ecstatic. This was so remarkable and
new to me and...
He
let go of my hand. "Are you alright?" he asked, startled. He
grabbed his medical book, looked at it, shook his head, and slid it away as he
stood up. "Are you in shock? I can help you. I used to be an EMT. I
don't have any medical equipment here, but hold on, Sadie. Everything's going
to be alright. Just..."
I
stared at him, blinking, then I laughed.
He
looked at me with the funniest expression of confusion I thought I'd ever
seen. "Sadie?"
"Ohhh."
I grabbed his hand and pulled him back into his chair. "No. I'm fine.
You're just so
warm.
"
"Oh,"
he said.
"It
feels nice," I said. "I like it." For good measure, I added,
"I'm not trying to come on to you. I'm sorry if it sounds that way."
"Oh,"
he said. "No, that's fine? Huh. So you like the warmth?"
"Yes."
I nodded. "A lot."
"Why
are you so cold?" he asked. "Is it because...?"
Because
I was a zombie. That's what he wanted to ask, I could tell, but I appreciated
him being nice about it. "Yes," I said. "I think so. We're
all like this. Me and the others."
The
others, I thought. I was one of them and Evan wasn't. He was someone else far
apart from what I was or what they were. I didn't know if I really belonged
here talking with him. I didn't know if it would cause issues with him,
either. Did he have someone waiting somewhere? Would they know he'd talked
with me? If I stayed near him, would he turn into a zombie too?
"I
want to help," he said all of a sudden, snapping me away from my
depressing thoughts.
"What
do you mean?" I asked.
"There's
something wrong. I don't know what it is, and I don't know if anyone knows,
but there's something wrong with..."
He
paused. I finished his sentence for him. "With me."
"No!"
Evan stared at me hard. I could see the fire in his eyes like the warmth in
his hands, steady and fierce. He touched me, placed his hand on my cheek
again. "Ugh. I'm not good at this. I don't know how to say it. There's
nothing wrong with you or anyone, Sadie. But... what's happened? Yes. What's
happened isn't your fault, or anyone's fault, really. I want to fix it. I
don't know how, or if I can, but I want to try."
I
stared at him, more attentive than I'd felt in months. The look in his eyes,
the way he kept his hand pressed against my cheek, his steady demeanor and his
refusal to back down; it captivated me. Pulsing, matching the rhythm of his
heartbeat, waves of incandescent heat spread from his hand to me. I held my
hands against the back of his, worrying he might let go of my cheek if I
didn't.
"I
would like to think you can," I said. "I don't know how you would,
though. I'm not sure it's possible."
Evan
nodded. "I don't know, either. I've been studying, though. See?"
He grabbed his book with his free hand and showed it to me:
Robbins
Pathologic Basis for Disease
. "Not that, um, you have a disease or
anything. I found the medical student curriculum in one of the offices here
and this book was on the required reading list."
"Are
you a doctor?" I asked.
"No.
Not quite. I'm an EMT. Or..." He paused and looked at me with a
strained look for a moment. Not quite at me, though, but past me. Through
me. "I was an EMT. I'm not sure there's really such a thing anymore,
though. I wanted to go to medical school and become a doctor. Or maybe a PA.
I didn't have a chance before everything kind of went crazy. That doesn't mean
I can't still do it, though. It won't be the same, but..."
"You're
brave," I said. "It doesn't matter if you can't technically do it.
I think you're very brave for wanting to do it anyways."
He
smiled. "Thanks."
I
felt shy, unsure if I should do this, but I decided to go for it. Leaning
towards him, I kissed his cheek.
I
nearly fell out of my chair, paralyzed by the feeling of his warmth against my
lips. My body froze, tightened, and I couldn't move away. Nor did I want to
move away. The heat, the pleasure, from something so simple as a kiss on the
cheek exploded inside me like a fiery blaze.
"Sadie?"
Evan said; but I was somewhere far away and couldn't hear him. "Sadie!
Sadie, are you alright?"
He
pulled me away and held my shoulders, looking hard at me. With my lips gone
from his cheek, I felt some semblance of regularity returning. I'd felt
imbalanced while kissing him, knocked out of equilibrium, like gravity had
ceased to exist and I was falling forever.
"I
don't think I should kiss you," I said, laughing, giddy.
"Oh?"
He smirked. "Why not?"
"That
was very strong. I felt heat--a lot of heat--and it felt nice but I couldn't
think straight for a second. I've never felt that way before."
"That's
curious," he said. "I wonder... what if I kiss you?"
I
didn't know. I didn't know but I wanted to know. I was no stranger to
kissing, but I hadn't ever kissed someone like that before. Who knew that a
casual, thankful kiss on the cheek could feel so passionate? That was the only
word I could think to describe it, like the fire of pure arousal licking at my
lips.
"Sorry,"
Evan said. "I didn't mean that in a flirtatious way. I was just thinking
out loud. Hypothesizing, if you will. I do that a lot now. Trial and error,
right? It's a good way to educate yourself as long as you're careful."
"Oh,"
I said. I wanted him to kiss me now, though. Was he going to?
He
gazed at me, into me. Our eyes met. I hoped he saw something nice in my eyes,
something he liked. I definitely liked his eyes. They were a sharp, piercing
blue and reminded me of something I'd seen recently, but I couldn't quite
remember what.
Bang!
Bang! Slam!
Jumping
up, startled, I looked towards the front of the library where the noise came
from. Evan stood with me, taking a place right next to me.
Staring
at us through the library's front windows was a small group of the others.
They slammed on the windows, trying to crack them open and break in. If they
kept it up, they probably would, too.
"They
shouldn't be in here," I said. "How did they get in? There's a
chain on the front gates."
Evan
sighed. "I broke the lock to get in here. I thought if I left the chain
in place no one would notice. I guess that didn't work out."
"I
know you want to help them," I said. Forcing myself to focus through the
intense warmth, I placed my hands on Evan's face and made him look at me.
"You need to run, though. They want to kill you."
"I
know," he said. "It's alright."
Dashing
a few steps away, leaving me cold and alone, Evan ducked under the library
table and grabbed something from beneath it. When he returned and stood up, he
held a crossbow and an arrow quiver full of bolts in his hands.
My
mind reeled and I stared at him, conflicted. "Evan, you can't. Please,
don't kill them. You need to run to safety."
He
flashed me a grin while strapping the quiver and crossbow to his back.
"No one's going to get hurt," he said. Without warning, he swooped
forward and took my hand in his. "Let's go."
"What
do you mean let's go?" I asked.
I
asked him this, but I was already going with him. Evan ran through the library
towards the back entrance with me in tow, squeezing my hand for good measure.
My legs felt slow and unsteady, but he helped me whenever I took a bad step and
nearly slipped. I followed him like a ship guided by a lighthouse, the
ever-present heat of his fingers offering me a breadcrumb trail out of this
screwed up fairytale forest.
Peeking
over my shoulder, I saw the others chasing us. One of them stood at the window
still, slapping on it with his bare hands, but the remaining four must have
found the front entryway into the library. They hobbled past the turnstile,
getting stuck in its slim path, but not for long. One made it through, then
another, the third and fourth. None of them waited for each other, though.
They
ran towards us in a shambling, awkward gait. The look of confusion on their
faces contrasted with the decisive look in their eyes. They didn't want me--I
was nothing but competition to them--but Evan's blazing heat was like the
promise of a goldrush in their minds.
I
understood now; I did. I resisted the urge to partake in the barbaric,
seemingly-mindless onslaught of the others, though, no matter how many times I
saw it or heard it nearby. Confused and lost, I wanted to retain whatever part
of me I could. I wanted to care and have concern no matter how broken and
defeated I was.
Others
wanted to feel alive. The touch of warm skin igniting life inside of them,
bringing them some semblance of normalness back to their cool, clumsy bodies.
Strong thoughts and feelings, sensations and emotions, they wanted all of it.
I
wanted it, too. Evan ran side by side with me, holding my hand, while the
noisy clatter of his crossbow rang through the air and gave away our every
move. All the others needed to do was listen for a moment and they'd know
where we went, whether we lost sight of them or not. We needed to go faster,
but I couldn't.
Evan
could, I knew. If he let go of my hand he could flee to safety without worry.
Even if he didn't know about the trees in the courtyard and how the college
students here used to use them to sneak out at night, he should be fine running
to the front gates and leaving the way he came in. If I let him go, if he ran
faster, he'd be free.
He
held my hand loosely, running with me, but I stopped and let his hand go. That
was it, I thought. I expected to see him continue running towards the rear
entrance and out into the open air, but he didn't. He stopped and turned
around, looking at me with a puzzled expression.
"Go,"
I said. "You can get away if you leave me here. They won't hurt me.
I'll be fine."
"I'm
sure you will," he said, smiling. He took my hand in his again and
squeezed it tight. "Come on. I have an idea."
"Didn't
you hear me?" I said. Looking back, I saw the others gaining on us. I
stood in place, thinking to force Evan to leave me, fighting against his gentle
tugs.
"I
heard you fine, Sadie. I just don't like your plan. Why not try going along
with mine?"
He
looked at me, smiling, not moving now. We just stood there quietly while the
others threatened to catch up to us. I turned and looked and saw the nearest
one only a few long library table's lengths away. Our chaser stumbled towards
us, persevering despite the difficulty.