Love Like You've Never Been Hurt (9 page)

Her eyes flew up to meet his and her cheeks colored, as they did
so often.

“I’m sorry about that too. I’ve been meaning to
thank you for not telling Pete what really happened. So, thank you.”

“Hey,” he did his best shoulder-shaking swagger, “I
was protecting the little lady’s honor. I told you I was a
gentleman, despite what you may believe. In fact, as I recall, wasn’t
this dinner about giving me the chance to prove that to you?”

“Yes,” she smiled, “it was.”

The waiter returned with their food.

Once he had left Jack said,
“So, go ahead, ask me anything. You can interrogate me to find
out what kind of human being I really am, how about that?” If
she wanted him as a friend then she really should get to know him,
and of course he was still hoping she would decide she wanted more
and surely this couldn’t hurt that. She was adorable as she sat
there looking at him, wondering what to ask. Her cream silk crossover
top and black pants told him she’d given some thought to what
to wear too. Light make-up and small diamond studs at her ears
completed her outfit. She looked stunning, but then he’d never
seen her look anything else.

“Ok, first tell me about your brother.”

He was puzzled by that. “You get to ask anything you want
about me and you ask about Dan instead?”

“It’s not as weird as you think. It’s actually
quite a clever ploy on my part.”

“And how’s that?” he was glad she was playing
along.

“First, people reveal their true selves when they talk about
their family. They can’t help but give away their views and
values. Second, normally when you ask someone about their siblings
they tell you about their childhood, which gives you a lot of
insight. And third, but by no means least, your brother is going to
be hanging out with my beloved godson, so I want to know more about
him.”

“I like the way you think. Well, Dan is three years younger
than me and he is definitely the smart one. You have a head start
because you know Scott. Scott is just like Dan and I’m actually
excited for the two of them to meet. At the weekend, I saw Scott
struggle in many of the same ways Dan did when he was a kid; how to
respond to people, how to make a point so that he would be
understood, and how to get the hell out when he’d had enough
people time and needed to get back to his machines which are much
easier for him to relate to.”

She smiled at his insight and he continued.

“Dan went through all of that as a kid and over the years
he’s found ways to cope and to enjoy life more. I’m
hoping that in sharing that with Scott he can shorten the kid’s
years of struggle and, at the same time, get to feel good about
himself by connecting with someone he genuinely understands and can
help. As for the childhood part, well, we had it tough. I’ll
leave it at that for now. Let’s just say our Dad wasn’t
the greatest. He died when Dan was fourteen. I already felt more like
Dan’s dad than his brother and that instinct kicked in even
stronger at that point. I’d always felt the need to protect
him, then there came the need to provide for him, and Mom too.”
He paused, he didn’t normally talk about his childhood at all.
This was strange, but it didn’t feel bad. He shrugged and gave
her a smile. “How am I doing so far?”

He was rewarded by an admiring look on her face. “Well, I
have to admit you are dispelling a few of my judgments.”

“Excellent. So what else do you want to know?”

“Why architecture?”

“Because you get to create something from nothing. You start
with nothing but an image of what you want in your mind. Then you
discover all the reasons why it can’t happen and you have to
figure out ways to make it happen anyway. There are rules and laws
which are unquestionable, but you get to work with them to create
something beautiful and functional. You can add to the quality of
people’s lives without them even knowing it. Whether it’s
by adding to the skyline of their city or creating the space in which
they spend many hours of their time, you touch people’s lives
with what you build. It’s something permanent too. It will
outlast you, and depending on the building, you are contributing
beauty, safety, protection, shelter to the lives of thousands of
people. That’s a good feeling.” He stopped again,
surprised at how much of himself he was revealing. He was relieved to
once again find her smiling admiringly at him.

“You really love it, don’t you?”

“Yes, I do, but I wish I could use it for something more
meaningful. I know I’ve found my path, I just haven’t
found the right way to walk it yet. If I’m honest I’ve
been enjoying the construction side of it more lately. The design
side is great, but to me it’s not complete without the actual
physical involvement. I worked construction as a kid, day laboring
wherever I could, so for me it’s like going back to my roots.”

“And what about Pete’s house? Will you design that or
will he?”

“
That will be a joint
effort. Pete’s brilliance is on the business side of things. He
has some ideas and he wants me to develop them, but of course it will
be his living space, so he’ll guide how he wants it. We’re
both excited to do the work too. I mean, we’ll have a crew of
course, but we’re both keen to do some real work. Pete likes
the idea of building his house with own two hands, and I get that.”

“I can’t imagine Pete having his own house up there.
That place is our childhood and this, well, it’s like bringing
it into the now. I like it.”

“Aren’t you doing the same thing? With your Aunt’s
house, your house?”

“I suppose so. I don’t think I’ve wrapped my
head around it yet. It wasn’t even really a plan, it suddenly
all came together last weekend. I’d been thinking about it, but
that was as far as it went.”

“What made you decide to do it?” he was intrigued.

She told him about her conversation with Ben on the way to Gramps’
house. He was surprised to see her eyes fill with tears and he took
her hand again. This time she didn’t pull away.

“I can’t imagine losing him. He’s all I’ve
got. I know he’s not going to be around forever and he’s
had a good run and all that, but still, he’s my only family.
Talking to Ben really brought it home. All I’m doing in LA
these days is bitching about the place and it became so patently
obvious: I don’t need to be here, and I do need be up there.
Why would I waste a summer here when I can spend it there with the
people that mean the most to me? I can spend precious time with
Gramps while I’ve still got him and have some fun with my
dearest friends.”

He held onto her hand and looked into her eyes. “And do you
want to count me as one of those friends?”

She didn’t look away from the intensity of his gaze. “I
would like you to be my friend, if you want to?”

Jack swallowed hard and decided to risk it. “Emma,” he
continued looking deep into her eyes, “you know I want to be
more than your friend.” He held on as she tried to pull her
hand back. “Will you give me a chance? Find out what we could
be together?” He left the question hanging, his heart hammering
in his chest.

“I can’t do that. I’m sorry Jack, but it’s
not going to happen.”

Disappointed, he let her pull her hand away. She was watching him,
waiting to see his reaction.

He shrugged his shoulders. “You can’t blame a guy for
trying now, can you?” She shook her head. “Good, because
if you’re not going to blame me for it, I’m going to keep
trying.” He flashed her the sexy grin and under the table he
rubbed his foot against hers. He loved the way she blushed so much.
It made him think of how she would look in bed, flushed with passion.
It also gave him hope that he was having some effect on her, despite
her denial.

Emma stared across the table at him, not knowing what to do with
this man. If she was honest, she’d like nothing more than to
join in with his flirting, see where this went. She wanted to feel
his arms around her again, be close to him and feel safe and
protected as she had on the floor of Pete’s office – but
that was the point, wasn’t it? If she did get involved with him
she wouldn’t be safe or protected, she would be exposed to all
the pain a man like him could inflict on her tender heart. Still, she
was flattered that he was interested in her. Perhaps she should enjoy
the banter until his infatuation passed and he moved on to pursuing
some beauty like the brunette in the corner who, Emma noticed, was
still eyeing him.

She completely surprised him when instead of rebuffing him, she
hooked her own foot around his calf and slowly rubbed up and down.

“You can keep trying Mr. Benson,” she laughed, “but
it won’t get you anything, other than a laugh with your
friend.”

“That sounds like a challenge to me, and I accept it.”
Seeing the determination in his eyes, Emma felt a mixture of
trepidation and excitement. She already knew he was a man used to
meeting challenges head on and coming out with what he wanted.

“
It’s more a
statement of fact, dear friend,” she smiled. “And on that
note, I think I should be heading home.”

Jack called for the check. “May I walk you to your car?”

“You could, but I walked here. I only live around the
corner.”

“Walk you home then?” He raised his eyebrows
suggestively, making her laugh. As she hesitated, he asked, “Would
there be any question that Pete or Ben would walk you home?”

“No.”

“Well, you’re the one that insists I’m to be
like them, so there’s our answer.”

As they walked, Emma caught glimpses of their reflection in store
windows. He was so handsome. And she had to admit that they did make
a lovely couple, him tall and dark, making her look tiny and blonde
at his side. They walked down by the waterfront. It was a beautiful
evening and the moon shone on the water. Jack grabbed her by the hand
and pulled her across the street.

“Come see the ocean.”

They stood leaning on the rail, looking out at the surf.

“I love living by the water.”

She smiled. “Well, you’ll be living by some different
water this summer.”

“As will you.”

They stood in silence looking out. Jack inched closer to her, and
she laughed and edged away. He slid closer again and this time she
stood her ground and hip checked him. Undeterred he edged closer
still until their sides were touching. Her heart beat fast as she
waited to see what he had in mind. She stayed still, staring out at
the ocean as he moved behind her and placed his hands either side of
hers, looking out over her shoulder. Her whole body trembled at the
nearness of him. Oh my. Sensible was such a silly word! His mouth
came close to her ear.

“Turn around, Emma.”

She stayed frozen to the railing. With one hand he swept the hair
away from the nape of her neck and brushed his lips against the
smooth skin there. She felt her knees go weak, grateful the railing
was there to support her. His mouth was by her ear again, his warm
breath sending goose bumps racing down her neck and arms.

“Turn around, Emma.” he said again, this time a little
more insistent.

Slowly she turned to face him. He held onto the railing either
side of her and leaned his weight against her. She was amazed by the
tenderness in the brown eyes looking down at her. He lowered his lips
towards hers, holding her eyes the whole way. She stared back at him,
unable to believe this was happening. He paused with his mouth an
inch from hers.

“Stop me now if you want to,” he murmured.

With a will of their own her hands reached up and buried
themselves in his hair; it felt as soft and silky as she had
imagined. She saw the smile spread across his face in the moment
before his lips met hers. Slowly he ran his tongue across her bottom
lip, waiting for her to respond. She parted her lips and kissed him
back, darting her tongue inside his mouth which seemed to ignite him.
He let go of the rail, holding her close with one hand at the small
of her back and the other cupping the nape of her neck, holding her
in place to receive the passionate kiss with which he was announcing
his intentions. Slowly he raised his head and framed her face between
his big hands. She stared up at him, her heart beating wildly and her
mind spinning. A single kiss had never had this effect on her before.

“You didn’t stop me, Em.”

She shook her head, unable to speak. He kissed her lips again and
she let him, surrendering to him, allowing him to explore her mouth
with his tongue, meeting him with her own. He lifted his head again
and smiled at her.

“See, that wasn’t so hard was it?”

She shook her head dumbly. She was suddenly aware that her hands
were still caressing his hair. She quickly brought them down and they
landed on his chest where she felt his heart thundering through his
shirt. She pushed with both hands against him, but he just held her
closer to him.

“Don’t push me away, Emma, please?” She looked
up, surprised by his tone. He was staring at her with longing in his
eyes.

“I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have kissed you,
but I couldn’t resist you.” She stared at him. “Please
say something?”

“I didn’t stop you,” she stammered.

“See!” he smiled, his confidence returning. “You
didn’t stop me because you wanted to kiss me too, and don’t
say you didn’t enjoy it.”

Emma was quickly regaining her senses. She shook her head. “But
we’re just friends,” she insisted.

Jack’s hands fell to his sides. “You kiss me like that
and then say we’re only going to be friends?” His
victorious smile was fading fast.

“Jack, I already told you, you can keep trying all you like,
but… we’re just friends.”

“OK, how about friends with kisses?” He was trying to
make her laugh again. Despite herself she had to smile at him. She
began walking again to her apartment which wasn’t far now. He
walked backwards in front of her.