Read Love UnCharted (Love's Improbable Possibility) Online
Authors: Love Belvin
My cheeks heated up and I slowly dropped my eyelids. Even after sleeping with Azmir for months, I am still taken by his attentiveness to my body. Yes, he’s handled me with little care, but the more I think about him branding me with his creamy essence, the less angry I feel. I’m not sure if that was his intent, to make it another sexual excursion in our relationship. But I’m secretly—and surprisingly—turned on every time I think about his scorching liquids against my skin.
Does this make me sick?
“I won’t do that again…unless you ask me to,” Azmir’s stern tone interrupted my ruminative thoughts. My eyes rose to meet his knowing gaze.
“Wha-huhn?” I felt my heartbeat increase and my mouth went dry, immediately embarrassed by the prospect of him reading my thoughts, something he’s done accurately in the past.
“It was not intended to please you, rather to level you and to serve as a reminder as to who you belong to. I was extremely…irate and acted with very little thought, but there was rationale. I’m sure you were affected by it. But if you liked it, maybe it’s something we can do again…only under better
circumstances.” His penetrative gaze seared me. My mouth hung open in sheer shock. “Did you enjoy that?” He eyed me with caution, lasciviousness gleaming from his smoldering eyes.
Did I?
I hated the circumstances, that’s for sure. Hated that his soul was missing went he handled me intimately. But I’m not sure there was anything Azmir did to me sexually that made me uncomfortable or left me anything short of wanting it again. Wanting him again.
How do I tell him this?
Abruptly, Azmir shakes his head, clearing his mind of the direction that answer could have taken us. “No. Don’t answer that. It doesn’t need to be addressed right now,” his tone sobered. “I’ve overworked your body and I’m sure your mind. Right now I assuage and then we get ready for our luncheon meeting with Taylor & Bacote.
“Taylor & Bacote?”
“Yes, Rayna. We have to meet with my public relations team to manage the aftermath of yesterday. It’s not something that I can ignore or wait to play out. With my status and Brian Thompson’s legal savvy, I have to position myself offensively perhaps.”
I couldn’t speak, I was frozen in my seat. What would I say anyway…
I don’t want to meet with the woman who is at the root of this problem?
That…
there’s no possible way she could help map out a solution when she was, in fact, the problem
? This couldn’t get any messier. How would I survive this season of Dawn Taylor? I had no clue, but quickly decided to keep moving forward. I wasn’t prepared to lose Azmir. I’d made that decision sometime last night. I would not forfeit whatever it is that we’ve been growing here.
True to his word, Azmir ushered me to the master bathroom and ran me a glorious bath in the Jacuzzi. He massaged me, limb by limb. He made nice with my body all right, my heart was a different matter. Something that a calming bath couldn’t settle. We talked and slowly readied ourselves with dressing for the meeting. On the drive there, I pondered on so much. I wondered what Azmir was feeling, was Thompson badly hurt from Azmir’s lightning speed jabs, was Dawn having a laugh at my expense, and how badly did she anticipate me screwing this up with Azmir so that she can sink her claws into him.
When we entered the upscale restaurant, my nerves started fraying immediately. I don’t know why Dawn represented such a threat to me, but she did. And it was clear she had some fixation with Azmir. Azmir gave his name and the hostess, who couldn’t get enough eye-time in with him, directed us to our table right away after informing, “Your party has been waiting on you, Mr. Jacobs. This way,” with a husky tone.
Ughhhhh! This wasn’t kicking off correctly at all. Azmir took me at the small of my back and I followed the tall brunette back to a secluded area. Right away Dawn and Shayna’s eyes were upon us. Shayna rose with a polite plastered smile, while Dawn remained seated along with her sinister sneer on her lips, but her eyes registered something entirely different. She actually looked shocked.
Azmir pulled out my chair, inviting me to sit before he greeted Shayna with a brief hug and Dawn with a handshake. Once everyone was seated, I noticed the uneasy expressions from both Dawn and Shayna. I felt out of place. Nervously, I brushed the back of my neck with my hand and glanced over to Azmir for guidance.
“Well, we didn’t expect you here, Rayna,” Dawn informed very perky in her tone, dripping righteous indignation. “After yesterday I thought you’d be somewhere…recovering from yesterday’s events.”
Already, her fangs were out, ready to attack. My heartbeat sped up and my body silently trembled. I wasn’t expecting her to come with it so soon. I didn’t want to engage in a war with her at this sensitive time in Azmir’s and my relationship. I tried to quickly center myself and play ball. I couldn’t let her back me into a corner. Not now. Not ever. But I had to move with tact.
“I have. And now we’re here. What do you have for us in terms of managing the chaos? It is your job, you know.”
Azmir grabbed my thigh from underneath the table before speaking, “Dawn, Ms. Brimm is here because this situation involves her. If we’re talking strategy, I’m sure it encompasses her. Here’s your opportunity to address her directly, but with diplomacy.”
“Sure, Mr. Jacobs. This is what we do,” Shayna spoke up, clearly attempting to soften the blow dealt by her partner. “Ms. Brimm, we don’t mean any harm at all. In fact, it’s important that you are here. There should be solidarity between you two. This is what we need to calm this matter.” Again, it was clear to me that there wasn’t a shared agenda between the two regarding Azmir. Her words didn’t do a lot to ease my nerves, but I appreciated the peace in her actions.
“Okay. First things first, are you two together…or will you remain together after yesterday’s event?” Dawn forged ahead with her
Kill Rayna Dead
campaign.
It was the best and the worst question to ask. Azmir and I didn’t have a title, therefore we’ve never been
together
. All we’ve had was an intimate relationship. This was the only thing that I was sure of.
What do I say? How do I respond?
I was slipping and slipping fast. I didn’t have an answer.
“Nothing has changed between Rayna and me,” Azmir spoke firm and in all of his CEO mien. It was his trustee strong and deliberate intimating tone that worked each time he executed it. “Rayna and I have spoken extensively over the past eighteen hours and we agree that nothing has changed in terms of our status. What took place yesterday was nothing short of a misunderstanding between Rayna and her overzealous colleague after a few drinks over a late lunch.”
Dawn’s mouth dropped. Even I was surprised by Azmir’s affirmation. He was unwavering in his summary of the situation. Shayna’s eyes were popped, but glued to the document before her. She slowly raised her pen to record his comments.
“Wow. That’s rather firm, Azmir,” Dawn mentioned.
“Oh, my position regarding my personal life is very firm, Ms. Taylor,” Azmir retorted. “And with that being said, I believe the etiquette for the nature of this meeting is that you reference me as Mr. Jacobs and to her as Ms. Brimm. I am paying you, not the reverse. I expect the utmost formalities when dealing with matters of business. Are we clear, Ms. Taylor?”
The table grew quiet. You could hear a pin drop. Dawn’s crimson lips were parted in shock. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t gloat in her discomfit. There’s nothing funny about being at the end of Azmir’s anger.
“Y-yes, Mr. Jacobs. Of course. I apologize for my lapse in professionalism.” Dawn shook her head in an effort to clear her brain. I watched raptly as she took a hard swallow, a fortifying move to regain herself. “Well, now that that’s out of the way, why don’t we discuss strategy. Huhn?” Dawn’s eyes ascended, agenda anew.
Azmir gave a firm nod before muttering, “We should. It is, by the way, what I pay you for.” The mocking in his tone was gentle, yet couldn’t be ignored.
“Okay…” Dawn breathed out, obviously taken by his crisp response to her. “…well, we’ve mapped out a plan that will include addressing the inquiry from calls that have been coming in from the magazines and bloggers you have established relationships with. They’ve heard about the incident involving Mr. Thompson and want details. Here’s how we’ll handle them…”
Dawn continued with strategy and Shayna filled in when it was her turn to speak. Though I listened fixedly, the tension looming over the table was palatable. No one was relaxed, not even Azmir, no matter how collected he appeared. This was going to be a long road ahead. Having to deal with the likes of Dawn Taylor would make the journey that much more arduous.
~~~~~~~~~~
It’s a Saturday evening and I’ve just returned from visiting my brother, Kemee, in Jersey. I caught a flight out first thing Friday morning and arrived just hours before his allotted visiting time. I would have returned right after, but Azmir insisted that I stayed overnight to recoup from the long flight. I remember Michelle scolding me about staying a few days and I wouldn’t relent. But now that I’m with Azmir I agonize over being separated from him for even one night.
The past couple of weeks had been so intense, but slowly I’d adjusted to being back at the marina. In my most candid ruminations, I’d admit that I so enjoy seeing Azmir every night and waking up to him every morning. He’s made my life so adventurous and settled at the same time. I honestly haven’t felt so at home since living with my parents as a child. Azmir’s apartment was far warmer and more welcoming than my own house in Redondo. I cherished that.
I would never compromise my commitment to my brother, so I complied with Azmir's wishes and stayed overnight. I also lied and told Azmir that I was going to visit Chyna again. He offered to send Chanell, but I declined, reminding him that I am a very private person and would prefer not giving people privy to my family life. I had to remind him of how difficult it was divulging parts of my life to even him. He relinquished after I conceded to staying one night.
I missed him before the plane took off. We usually find ourselves in a passionate lovemaking session prior to either of us traveling, but he’d become so preoccupied with work that I didn’t see him before leaving for the airport.
Tonight was a big show at Cobalt. It had been talked about on the radio and advertised over the Internet. Even bloggers were posting about the precedence this scale of event would take. It was a very popular R&B artist touring and agreed to make Cobalt a leg in schedule. This particular artist drew other big wig names as well, so it was sure to be a night of celebrities at the club. I heard very little from Azmir since my plane arrived in L.A. I sent a couple of texts, but decided not to call.
I ran to the high-rise to quickly shower and dress. I swear since being with Azmir I feel like I lead the life of a celebrity. I'm constantly traveling, always having clothing delivered to me or am at a boutique, buying pieces for upcoming events. Shoot, I now even have personal shoppers and makeup artists, vying for signed contracts with me. It can all be overwhelming, but I constantly remind myself that my life is now anew, as it includes the business mogul, A.D. Jacobs.
I select a Rebecca Taylor cheetah print mesh daisy dress with long sleeves and low neckline. It falls inches above my knees. I paired it with my above-the-knee, black Christian Louboutin boots. I accessorized with oversized gold hoops and flashy bracelets and kept my makeup mild with simple smoky eyes and nude lips. As I gave myself a final look over in the mirror, I felt a singe of excitement travel up my spine as I imagined seeing Azmir. I couldn’t wait to get him home tonight. You would think that after his cannibal antics following the Thompson incident that I wouldn’t think about being with him for weeks to come. And as much as his behavior still haunts me, I have my needs of him.
I decide not to take the S550 tonight, but instead I grab the keys to his SLS. I swear, this man has more cars than he can drive. I had to admit, every once in a while it was fun playing with Azmir’s toys.
When I arrived at the club, as usual, there was a line wrapped around the corner. I head into the private parking lot and show my face to the club’s parking security. He nodded his head in approval and directed me in. I parked next to Azmir’s 750 a felt another chill zing through me. I went in and headed to the hostess to find out where I’d be seated. She had security escort me over to the V.I.P. section where I saw lots of familiar faces, Petey’s being one.
“Oh, shit! Sup, Rayna!” he greeted, exposing all of his teeth.
“Hey, Petey! Great seeing you. You’re looking like you’ve slimmed down a bit,” I charmed.
He gave a goofy laugh that warmed my heart. Though I still held my reservation about his orchestration at Kid’s party with Dawn Taylor, I’d easily learned to love Petey. He was very devoted to Azmir and that went a long way with me. I greeted Kim who has grown on me a lot as well. When I met her I could hardly get her to muster three consecutive words and now she’s my favorite chatter box—second to Chanell, who was there as well, dancing in her seat.
Then my eyes somehow met those of Dawn Taylor’s. As much as I wanted to question her being here I knew I couldn’t. This was a big night and the first of Bacote & Taylor’s work with Cobalt. Azmir prepared me earlier on in the week, saying Dawn would be around more often than usual as their marketing strategies would be launched over the next few months. I had to decide that if I wanted this thing with Azmir to work I’d have to bear the brunt of her presence and exposure to Azmir. But that decision wasn’t met without apprehension. What helped me arrive at that decision was how he’d never changed his password to his cell phone records, subliminally saying he had nothing to hide. Either way, seeing Dawn did something to me. It was a reminder of who my
cleanup lady
was. There was always something behind her charming smirk. Just like tonight. She gave a knowing smirk as her way of speaking. I responded with a firm nod.