Love UnExpected (Love's Improbable Possibility) (21 page)

“...or early
,” he replied with a snort.

I lowered myself onto his lap and h
e embraced me willingly. 

“You can't do what you did to me earlier and then abandon me after. It makes me feel used
,” I teased. 

He smirked, “You can't put on me what you put on me earlier after not putting it on me in so long and expect me not to be transfixed. It's hard to sleep after that.”

His eyes never met mine. Something was wrong.

“Azmir, what is it? Something isn't right.”

He shook his head as he widened his eyes in a flutter. It was as if he was trying to shake something off.

Did I do something wrong in there?

“Is it me?”
I let slip involuntarily.

“No, baby, it
’s not you at all,” he denounced the thought immediately. He pulled my chin into his lips and kissed me softly. I was convinced. I’d also felt the current that flashed inside when he touched me. He gazed deeply into my eyes before relenting. His eyes diverted back to view of the water, “All right,” he expelled a lungful sigh.

“A few months back...on my birthday in fact, I got a call from my mother.”

What?
“I thought you haven't heard from her in years,” I said with incredulity, more in terms of a statement than a question. 

His right han
d shot up gesturing a defeated concept, “I haven't.”

“Well, what did she say? Did she give any explanation for her absence?” I felt more maternal and protective than romantic.
What gives?

He gave a sexy chuckle
. 
Damn! Azmir, I'm trying to get out of aphrodisia here and you're not helping
.

“She's been incarcerated. All these years she's been incarcerated.”
He paused with his gaze fixated onto the marina. “Funny thing is she's been out for nearly a year and she's just calling. She said she's been looking for me...but I don't know...” his voice trailed off.

“You have questions
,” I discerned.

His eyebrows shot up
—, “Hell yeah,” he affirmed in a moderate tone.

“Well, you won't get them answered if you don't ask.
Ask.
Ask her all the questions your heart needs to be at peace with this. Ask.”

His eyes were still in the distance. There was another pause before he sn
apped out of his trance, “Those are decisions that can be made at another time,” as he drew me closer to him. “Right now, I'd like to decide how I subdue the burning desire I have to be inside of you again.”

Damn. I'm done.

Azmir lowered my legs on either side of his as we both faced the water and took the tips of his fingers, dancing them up my thighs. I sharply drew in a breath. 

“What are you wearing?”
he teasingly asked while traveling to my pelvic area. “A thong, aye?” he commented at his discovery. I reclined into him, planting my head against his clavicle bone. I wanted to squirm because his hands felt so good and intrusive, but I decided to fight the urge and just close my eyes.

“
Hmmmmmmmm...” he groaned as his first two fingers found their way to my pearl. He played with it, massaging it over and over and over again. Simultaneously, his right hand came up to reach my right breast and he gently stroked it. I tried to fight the urge to jolt. But his soft breathing in my air increased my aroused state and there was now too much going on to keep me calm. His two fingers slid their way down into my canal.

“I thought you'd had enough
,” he whispered referring to my natural lubrication, no doubt. Then the low whistle of his teeth goes off. “You just may have been missing me as much as I've been missing you. Let's see,” he said as he pulled my camisole down under my right breast...then left. I felt free. He pinched and pulled my nipple. I could no longer keep still. His fingers went in and out and I gyrated along with them causing friction. I felt his erection throbbing beneath my ass, down to the back of my right thigh. My senses were on overload.

“Ahhhh...Azmir
,” I cried out. I heard him snort in my ear. 

“Too bad I don't have a condom handy out here...or else I can have something else inside you
,” he seductively taunted. 

My arms moved up and behind me to his head. It kept my hands busy as my body was being worked over.
 

“Oh, I forgot
—no barriers are needed,” he said in a teasing tone.

He scooted me forward on his lap as he pulled down his shorts and underwear just enough to release his indisputably erect
and wide penis. He grabbed my near-limp body and lifted it slightly in the air to slowly lower it onto him.

“Ahhhh!” I cried out in tantalizing pleasure. My back arched as he pushed my hips back and forth to control my movements. It gave me a moment to gain my stride. And once I did my strokes were savage and uncoordinated because my
sex was that sensitive to his every move. My breasts clapped against each other adding to the erotica. He tried to help me out by flexing his hips, but that just further spun me out of control and caused my upper body to incline in his lap. I grabbed hold of his knees to steady myself.

Fuck! Why do I feel like a teenager having sex for the third time?
My control abandoned me. He grabbed me by the shoulders to pull me back. 

“Let me put you out of your misery
,” he muttered.

I didn't quite grasp that until moments later when he grabbed both breasts in his hands and began flickering my nipples. His strokes were intense and well met
, causing me to feel his thick cock rubbing against a new wall. Up and down I moved. In and out he went. My muscles tightened and my stomach seemed to have disappeared. An orgasm tore through me and was so intense that tears filled my eyes. Azmir's tantalizing whimpers from his own orgasm caused them to overflow and fall down into my face as I plunged on his lap. More tears.

I couldn't explain the tears. I just felt emotions and I'm never good with managing them. It seemed that every time I connected with Azmir it stirred up something in me that I could not explain. He was
 so passionate and purposeful when we made love. It was as if he was trying to become one with me...fuse our spirits. Only, I didn't think mine was available. I felt so empty inside until moments like this. And when I came down from our intimate phenomenon, reality set back in and I was left empty once again.

“Hey. Are you crying? Did I hurt you? What's wrong?” Panic rose in Azmir at each word.

I winced of pleasure as he lifted me from his containment and turned me around in his lap. He ignored the mess made by his translucent specimens that were escaping me. I couldn't hold back the tears. I wasn’t sure how hard I tried. 

“
No. Don't cry. This isn't a reason to cry. Are you okay?”

After a few seconds I murmured, “I don't know if I can be what you need. You
’ve been so good to me...so patient and kind. And I've been moving at a pace that makes me wonder if I'm fooling you...
or me
. I don’t want to hurt you,” I whimpered through my tears.

He was silent and I didn't know what that meant.

“I'm depleted. I don't know how to pursue, let alone, maintain a relationship—intimate or platonic. You deserve someone who can. You deserve so much more.” My cry went from weeping to all out bawling as I realized I’d betrayed myself. I told Azmir what my biggest fear was concerning him.

“Hold on...wait...wait
,” he comforted as he rose from the seat taking me with him. He gently let me onto my feet then wiggled out of his shorts, lifted me in his arms again and walked me back into the apartment leaving the gorgeous view of the marina and the whispering bliss of our lovemaking back on the patio.

He ushered me into the master bathroom
, letting me down on the floor. Azmir stepped in the shower to turn it on. After that, he began removing my lingerie. He pulled his black T-shirt over his head before leading me in the shower. I stood in front of him as the water sprinkled down onto my body. I then felt the soft scraping of the body scrubber being applied to my back. Then to my shoulders. He worked his way down to my feet before cleaning the front of my body. He let me wash my private areas while he washed himself. When I glanced over my shoulder to look at him, his eyes fell down to the floor.

What in the hell does that mean?
Once again I’m lost for perception. 

Once we were done
, he reached over me with his long arms, turned the water off and went out to retrieve a towel that he wrapped around me then led me out. Azmir grabbed another towel to quickly dry himself and then wrapped it around his waist. He took the towel from around me and dried me from neck to toe.

When he was done and had wrapped the towel around my shoulders, “When I spent time in juvie I told myself that I would not be violated. I came up against a few brutal contenders but always triumphed, even if it were by the skin of my teeth. I also told myself that I would never return. I'm still a free man. About a week after my release
, I told myself that I would never be poor again and that I would work so hard that I would have multiple businesses, giving me an empire. I think I'm at sixteen now...and steadily increasing. I told myself that if I found the right woman I’d pursue her endlessly and give her the world that I've abound. Weeks later you showed up in my boardroom requesting space on my property. I don’t make promises to myself that I can’t keep, Ms. Brimm.” He kissed me on the side of my head. I was at a loss for words.

“I’
m not a very patient man. I do apologize for that. I’ve applied pressure that you’re not comfortable with. I’ll slow down but will not stop until you’re mine. But it must be your choice," Azmir spoke with conviction as we both gazed at each other through the massive vanity mirror. 

“What irony, that the one thing I desperately want and am vigorously pursuing doesn't think she's enough. I
’ve amassed $439 million in three years, all on gut intuition and knowing my opponents. I make no mistakes in acquisitions. I seriously doubt if that’ll start here.” His glaring through the mirror into my eyes said so much that ears couldn't hear. 

It was in that moment that I knew indisputably that I had to work on me. I had to repair my broken spirit. I had to learn to be
 emotionally sound and independent. I had to learn how to trust people and be loved. I couldn't receive what this man was offering because I knew none of it.

“Come. Let's go to bed. It's late
,” he ordered. 

We retreat
ed to his bedroom and I asked, “Can I borrow a T-shirt?  Since I’ve soiled my only lingerie here...”

He squinted his eyes then let out a hint of a smirk. “In the third draw
er from the top of the first set to the left.”

I trotted over into the enormous walk-in closet and located the draw
er. As I pulled it out, attractive feminine colors popped out. I saw purples, pinks, soft blues, ivories and all in different fabrics. There was lace and silk. I couldn't believe he brought these for me and stored them at his place, further illustrating his desire for me to move in.

Hmmmmm...
I went to the next drawer to find his underwear neatly folded and arranged by color. His cleaning lady does a hell of a job organizing. I opened the next drawer and found crisp white crew neck T-shirts. I quickly grabbed one. 

When I returned to the bedroom I stood at my side of the bed as Azmir took inventory of my attire. “This is perfect!” I exclaimed like a goofy
schoolgirl and jumped into bed not giving him a chance to respond. He turned off the only light that was on then immediately scooted over to me draping his long and warm arm over me, buried his face into the back of my neck and exhaled.

There’s that current. Damn. I hope he didn't feel my body jolt
.

“Azmir, what was the name of that song you sang to me earlier?” I had to know.

“Mmmmmmm...” he hummed trying to regain consciousness from the sleep that was falling upon him. “Moody's Mood for Love. Quincy Jones,” he murmured into my neck.

Damn current!
 

Hmmmmmm...
“That wasn't Quincy singing on it...” I quizzed.

“Nah. That was Brian McKnight, Take 6 and Rachelle Ferrell.”

“It was beautiful,” I whispered. “What made you select that song?” Again, I had to know. I'd never seen him so relaxed and spirited as I did during his performance.

He backed his head from my neck.

Shit. Did I screw this up again?

“Because it exemplifies how I feel about you. My pops would sing
it almost every night to my mom when I was a kid. Frankie Crocker used to sign off to the original version every night on a New York City radio station. My dad said one day I’d sing it to a woman who captured my heart like my mom did his. I like Quincy's rendition. I've liked it for years. Finally, I can sing it with conviction...because I get it.”

I couldn't cry
any more tears in front of this man, though they were impending. Although the words easily flowed from his tongue, I had no doubt that they were sincere. I envied that. I wanted the ability to express my convictions so boldly and with such ease.