Love Unrehearsed (31 page)

“You have something you forgot to tell me?”

My phone rang twenty seconds later.

“Is he gone?”

I finished my drink. “Yeah, he just left. You pissed him off.”

“Good. He better not make a habit of coming around.”

“I love it when you get jealous. Makes me feel wanted.”

“I’m serious, Taryn. He even stops in for a beer I want to know about it.”

“I’m not going to run off with him. You don’t need to worry. So when were you planning on telling me I am under surveillance?”

“You’re not under surveillance, hon. We hired private security to keep an eye on things since we’re not there. But we’re coming home next Friday. I have four days off.”

Hearing that made my day. “You’re coming home?”

“Yep. We’ll be in around two. I really hate that you’re not with me. I can’t sleep without you.”

“I can’t sleep, either. I’m so used to feeling you next to me . . . Thanks for hiring someone.”

“Mike and I are splitting it.”

My head spun. “Why is Mike paying for my security?”

“He’s not. Security is for the both of you. Mike is worried about Gary. Apparently his security background check revealed that Gary owns a lot of guns.”

“He does, but . . .” The thought of Gary attempting to harm Marie was infuriating. “Hang on. I want to go upstairs.” I slipped out of the booth and grabbed Thomas’s empty glass. Marie was behind the bar just a few feet away. I ducked into the kitchen, walking past quizzical looks from Pete and Tammy, and hit the apartment steps to continue my private conversation with Ryan. “I don’t understand. Why does Mike care? Marie’s not even speaking to him.”

“Yeah, Mike said she’s avoiding him but he’s planning on fixing that. Listen, you have to talk to her. I know things looked bad but it’s nothing like it appeared and now that those pictures were published he’s pissed-off and miserable.”

“What do you mean things aren’t what they appeared to be?”

My mouth hung open as he told me the rest of what Mike was really up to.

As soon as we ended our call, I ran down the steps and grabbed Marie.

Uncovered

“I hate funerals,” Marie said softly as we drove away from the cemetery.

My heart was aching; the sight of seeing a casket tethered above a gaping hole brought back too many bad memories.

Seeing Thomas looking so wiped out was painful.

Just seeing him a few days ago was enough to make me replay every word we’d exchanged, each fond memory I had of him—everything. I hated him for making me reminisce.

Marie stuffed a tissue in her purse. “I can’t believe she’s gone. I didn’t even know she came home.”

“I know. I’m glad they didn’t put her on display. Melanie would not have wanted that.”

“No,” Marie agreed, wiping her nose again. “She would have bitched to high heaven if her family did that to her.” I saw her look over at me. “How are you doing?”

I met her eyes. “I’m okay.”

“Spending some time on Memory Lane?”

Marie knew me so well. “Kind of hard not to.”

“Well, snap out of it. Ryan doesn’t need to see that deep-in-thought pouty look.”

I eyed her speculatively. “You may want to take your own advice there, missy. You still have to deal with Mike.”

She grinned to herself. “I know.”

“So, did you forgive him?”

“Yeah.” Marie nodded. “He told me that she had some personal matters with an ex who was harassing her. He didn’t go into details but I believe him.”

“Good.”

She twisted her hands nervously. “I just don’t know if getting involved with someone is wise right now, you know? I spazzed over a stupid magazine cover.”

I knew exactly how she felt. “Scary stuff when you see your man on those covers, isn’t it?”

She groaned and I could tell just from her expression that she finally could relate.

“I understand,” I said. “Believe me. Thomas’s cheating made me question every man’s motives. That kind of betrayal sticks with you forever. All I can say is follow your heart.”

“Or my vagina,” she said with a laugh.

I smiled at her.

“Speaking of confusion, where are you heading?” she asked.

“I brought all of those keys. Thought since we were over this way we could stop at the bank before the guys land.”

After arriving at the bank, we sat in the lobby, waiting for the next customer service person to help us. Marie tapped me on the thigh, noticing that the woman approaching us was smiling like a fangirl at me. I let her gush for a minute about how wonderful Ryan Christensen is before getting down to business.

The customer service clerk helped sort through the random baggie of keys, narrowing them down to a handful that might get me into Lockbox 291. Marie and I had found forty random keys when we searched; unfortunately none blatantly screamed “safe deposit box.” “Last key,” I said, trying the last one, small and made of brass. I almost felt giddy when it slipped in and turned.

We pulled the inner black metal case out and she set it on a table, leaving to give me privacy.

Marie raised her eyebrows, waiting in anticipation.

I pulled the top lid back, spying several stacks of letters rubber-banded together. The rubber was so old it crumbled around the envelopes.

I flipped through them, seeing that all of them were addressed to me from Private Joseph Malone.
Who the hell is Joseph Malone?

“What is all of that?” Marie asked. “Who are they from?”

“I’m not sure.” I opened up one of the letters, scanning writing I’d never seen before. There was also a twenty-dollar bill inside the envelope.

Dear Taryn,

I hope you had a fun birthday. Five years old now! I can’t believe how much you’ve grown. I promise when I come home I’ll take you to the toy store so you can pick out a new Barbie doll. I remember how much you liked playing with them. I’m at a place called Fort Gordon now. It’s in Georgia. You’ll be happy to know that they painted me green just like you said they would. I’m a real army soldier now. It’s really hot here. I’m learning how to do all sorts of crazy things, like crawl through the mud and climb over tall obstacles. I’m a good climber. I hate crawling in the mud. I think you’d find the mud yucky, too.

I have another six weeks to go and then I might go over the big ocean in a huge airplane. I hope your daddy will use the money I put in the envelope to buy you a new dolly for me until I can see you again. Be a good girl like I know you are.

Love you forever,

Joe

“Who’s Joseph Malone?”

My hands shook. I felt a trickle of sweat slide down my spine, or maybe that was just my nerves. “The only Malone I know is my aunt Joan. That’s her married name.” I dug through the piles, feeling nauseous. There had to be thirty or forty letters from him addressed to me from all around the globe. Was my father protecting me from a stalker?

At the very bottom of the pile was a thick white envelope with the word
Original
written in blue ink. I swallowed hard.

As soon as I opened up the folded papers, I felt a warm rush of panic roll throughout my entire body.

“Oh my God. No. No.”

I couldn’t get to the garbage can in the corner fast enough before I threw up the entire contents of my stomach.

“Oh no. Oh, Taryn,” I heard Marie say as I retched into the steel can.

I faintly remember Marie driving us home.

I sat at one of the booths in the pub, reading letters about Joe’s army life, his travels to the Persian Gulf, trying to piece it all together while Marie hovered.

We had an hour before we’d open the pub and a band was scheduled to play, but I couldn’t stop the tears. I wasn’t even sure what I was crying about anymore. My entire world—everything I’d ever known—had been turned inside out, where truth and lies and real and alternate insane realities had reversed.

I didn’t even know who I was anymore. Of all the things to find in a lockbox, this was something I wouldn’t have ever guessed. It was all so overwhelming to process.

I was in a state of shock when Ryan and Mike arrived. I saw Marie run for the kitchen door.

The moment I saw Ryan standing a few feet away, calling to me, I lost it, hurling my body at him and clinging to him like a lost soul in need.

“Oh baby. Everything will be okay. I’ve got you. Shhh . . .” He let me cry for what felt like ages, rubbing my back and soothing me with comforting words.

“Come on. Let’s get out of here. Let’s go get some air.” He put his arm around my shoulders and walked me slowly, patiently, to the beach.

The breeze coming off the ocean tossed our hair and tinged my nose with the familiar salty air. We walked for a while before he sat us down on the hardened sand. He put me between his legs, gently combing my hair back.

“Whatever names are on that paper doesn’t change who you are.”

New tears streamed down my face. I felt empty and twisted inside. “But it does. It changes everything. Everything I thought was real isn’t.”

Ryan shook his head, cocooning me with his body. “You can’t look at it like that, hon. The people who raised you are your parents. They loved you. Just because someone else gave birth to you doesn’t change who you are.”

Nothing would ever be the same. “My entire life has been a lie.”

“No, it hasn’t.”

I wiped my cheeks with my sleeve. “I don’t know why I’m so surprised. I always knew I didn’t look like either one of them. Eyes, nose . . . I used to stare at my face for hours trying to find a piece of them in me.”

I snuggled into his shoulder, feeling the chill off the ocean mix with the chill ripping though my body. My face felt sticky from crying. The waves rolled in, misting the air, mimicking the push and pull of my own emotions.

As I watched the gulls fly and land, guilt crashed over me. “I can’t believe this. I’m sure everyone knew except me. Well, I guess this explains why my mother and her sister stopped talking to each other. Now I know that I was the cause of that fallout.”

Ryan rested his chin on my head. “Don’t start blaming yourself. They were adults who made their own paths. You had no influence over that.”

I took the paper out of my pocket, showing Ryan my original birth certificate. I left the official adoption papers back at my apartment with all of the letters. “According to the papers, my birth parents were both sixteen when I was born.” I wiped my face and blew out a cleansing breath, trying to pull myself together. “I remember my mom telling me that the reason I was an only child was that because I was so special, she only needed one. It’s always bothered me why I didn’t look like either of them.”

Ryan sighed and squeezed me with his arms. “Your mom and dad did a fantastic job caring for you. There are plenty of people out there who are unfit parents. You said it yourself; they were just kids, Tar. Probably scared shitless.”

“Joe went into the army after he got his GED. I was three or four, I guess. Sent me money in every letter, trying to do right by me. I just feel like I have so many questions now.”

He pulled me in tight. “You do what you have to to resolve this but remember, the people who raised you are your mom and dad.”

“They should have told me.”

His eyes narrowed, almost reprimanding me. “Why? What would you have gained from that knowledge?”

“I never had a chance to get to know the people who brought me into this world. I really think my cousin Joe wanted to know me. My parents kept that all from me.”

Ryan swiped a thumb across my cheek, wiping away a tear. “Maybe they had their reasons. Look, I know you feel torn up. Anyone would. But your family
kept
you in the family. They are still all related to you by blood. I’ve seen pictures of you growing up and I can tell you that those two people who raised you adored you.”

As we walked back to the pub, I made the decision to find out what those reasons were.

I knew making this phone call would be difficult. My heart clenched when she answered the phone.

“Hi, Aunt Joan. It’s Taryn.” I was greeted with silence and for a moment I thought I’d need to tell her who I was again.