Loved by a Werewolf (4 page)

“What you need?” Matt asked.

Jex noticed that spit and precome was the only thing linking Matt’s mouth and his cock. Those deep eyes looked up at him and he saw something in them. Unease, he thought. He just wasn’t certain what was going on. Maybe even what he was doing was wrong.

Jex didn’t like that look in his eyes. He didn’t like to even think Matt thought he was doing something wrong. It wasn’t right and it cooled something deep inside him. Though he still wanted to come something chronic, he was convinced he was going to freeze in this painful moment of not coming.

“It’s not…can’t…need you to…Ah, fuck it.” Jex fumbled to get his hands out of the sheets, then, because he didn’t want to be the one that did it, he clumsily tried to grab Matt’s hand, the one digging into his thigh.

Matt caught on quickly, giving up the grip in Jex’s muscles, and offered his hand to Jex.

With a swallow that helped pool spit into Jex’s mouth and a shift of his leg, the one that wasn’t trapped under Matt, he pulled two of Matt’s fingers into his mouth and tried to transfer enough spit from his mouth onto Matt’s fingers. Meanwhile Jex was smiling from his eyes at the stunned heated surprise that lined every inch of Matt’s face.

“Use them,” Jex said breathlessly. The look and the gasps made Jex light headed due to the need to come and anticipating how Matt was going to get him there.

Matt’s hand hovered where Jex let go of it for a long while. It seemed his mind couldn’t quite understand what his eyes were telling them. He wanted to laugh, but he didn’t. There wasn’t anything funny about this. Only a real bad need to come.

“Okay,” Matt groaned and engulfed Jex’s cock with a clumsiness that wasn’t there before.

Jex loved it. A deep swallow had Matt shifting his body in between Jex’s legs, opening him up for Matt. The hand on his balls moved back up to his shaft, squeezing, stroking his mouth, focusing on the head, sucking and quick back forth wipes of his tongue as the shaft hand moved up and down.

Then, he dipped one finger slowly into Jex’s arse. It wasn’t enough, but Jex could feel it, and liked the slight stretch. One finger hadn’t been enough for a long time, but knowing it was Matt’s finger up there was something else and pleasant.

His body wasn’t having any of the slowness, though. He didn’t want to deal with the exploration. He didn’t care about that now. This wasn’t the time or the place. Jex needed to come, and this slow touch wasn’t going to get him there.

“Another,” Jex nearly screamed as Matt twisted that one finger at the first knuckle. “More, need more. Please Matt. You won’t hurt me.”

And that was all it took for Matt to let go.

With a quick withdraw of that one finger out, two pushed in. A perfect burning sensation radiated out of that spot and split his spine in half. Pleasure clouded his mind, shot down his spine and with a brutal punch, hit his balls and helped push his seed out the top of his cock. The pleasure was so high, he wondered if it would blow out the back of Matt’s head. But that didn’t matter, not really. Not when he got to fly.

“Jex! Jex!” Matt’s frantic voice shattered the bliss. It was hard, but he managed to bring himself back down.

“Yeah,” he panted, noticing that his body was humming, his hands still clutched in the sheet under him. His mouth was dry, but he couldn’t seem to care, not when his heart raced.

“Jex,” Matt said.

Jex brought his gaze down the sweaty line of Matt’s body, over his red flaccid cock and up into the deep eyes that watched him like the beast last night.

“I really need to fuck you,” he growled.

“You’re the werewolf,” was Jex reply.

Matt heaved a deep sigh and dropped his head. His forehead landed on Jex’s thigh. “God, Jex, I can’t lie to you.”

They were silent for a short while. Jex realised that Matt’s breathing was a little choppy, and laced his fingers loosely into his hair.

Matt shuddered, and slowly, his head lifted as Jex’s fingers reached his temples.

“I always wondered why you smelt so different,” Jex said softly, the words just coming out of his mouth.

Matt’s laugh was soft, as shaky as his fingers when they closed over Jex’s, holding Jex’s hand closer to his face, eyes drilling into him.

“Scared...” Matt shuddered again, “You scared the shit out of me when they took you. I didn’t know what was happening. Didn’t know what they wanted. I should have...you’ve told me enough about your dad. About the shitty life you’ve had to live. I’ve seen the way you look around you all the time,
as if you were waiting for that to happen. You’re more paranoid than I am.” He smiled sadly. “But I couldn’t think when they kidnapped you
—you had been taken. I felt as if something inside of me was ripped out.

“I couldn’t think about anything but finding you and making sure you were safe. So I followed the van, probably fucked myself a little, because who can truly keep up with a moving vehicle? Yet, I did, at least until they hit the woods. It was too close tonight, too close to the moon, and as soon as that half of me smelt the timber, the air combined with the need to get you back...

“I ended up having to duck into the woods there at the edge and shift, even though it was still daylight. I’ve never shifted that early in the day before, but once the wolf half was out, I started searching. I knew you were in the woods and all I had to do was find you...” his voice trailed off.

“And you did.” Jex smiled. “You saved me.”

Matt laughed. “Probably not through the best means, though.”

“Maybe, but they would have hurt me. They wanted money from my old man, but they hated his guts, so I doubt I would have been left whole.”’

Matt blinked his eyes when they connected back up to Jex’s. They were bright and maybe a little shiny. “God. I could smell it on them. Smell what they wanted from you. They were angry, pissed, and horny. My insides screamed. You are mine, and they wanted to take you away from me. I couldn’t stand it. Couldn’t let that happen. Every one of them had to die because they were looking at you as if they wanted to keep you, hurt you. And I wasn’t—why are you smiling like that?”

“Like what?” Jex asked. Huh, his lips were smiling.

“I’m not sure. You’ve always been good at confusing me because you’ve learnt to hide too much, but it’s...I don’t know. It’s giving me butterflies.”

“You said I was yours,” Jex confessed in a whisper that even he could barely hear.

Matt grinned, though it was both goofy and embarrassed. “Yeah, well...they say all werewolves find a mate, and when they do, they calm down. They don’t have such hard shifts and they don’t lose themselves for days. Hell, it’s even said that some even lose the gift to shift if their mate sooths them enough.”

“You think I’m your mate?” Again, Jex’s voice held a softness he didn’t know he had inside him. But Matt was confessing something big here, wasn’t he?

Matt looked down. “I’ve known since my first moon shift after meeting you, though I had my suspicions from the second I smelt you. But I wasn’t sure how you would go for that. Not so much me telling you I’m a werewolf. That’s just stupid in all rights, but just me loving you, I wasn’t sure if you were gay or not. Even when I knew you found me attractive, I still wasn’t sure how you were handling it, if it was new to you or if you were freaking while unable to stop seeing me. So, I waited. I was happy to wait. Just getting to know you soothed me enough that I could understand what was happening around me while in wolf form.”

“So, you’ve loved me since we first meet?”

Matt laughed a little. “No. I wanted you. God I wanted you badly, but it wasn’t until we spent time together and I realised what kind of man you were. I learnt your history, or what you would tell me, and saw more. That you weren’t a pissed off prick because of the shit you’ve lived through. That’s when I started to fall for you. When I realised you wanted to know me just as much as I wanted to know you.”

“Why didn’t you say something, hint that you liked me that way?” Jex couldn’t keep the hurt feeling out of his voice.

“What if you couldn’t deal with just me liking you? A dude wanting to fuck you? I couldn’t lose you. Honestly, Jex, I would have stayed in your life as just a friend, forever, if that’s all I could get from you. I would have been happy just to know you, to be your friend.”

Jex swallowed hard. That was a sacrifice, wasn’t it? A fucking big one. One that got his heart twisting inside his chest.

“But...” Jex couldn’t think around the emotions that filled him from that. Couldn’t think of something to say that would assure Matt that he would never even ask him to be less than everything to him.

“It’s okay, Jex,” Matt mumbled, a sad smile pulled at the side of his mouth, “I’m happy with what we had.”

“But...” God why was talking so difficult?
Because your fuckarse father got you paranoid to be who and what you truly are.
It was true, and as they lay there in the silence of a confession and as close to love as Jex would ever expect to hear, he couldn’t seem to open his mouth and turn this into something that he had wanted from the moment that he met Matt.

But wasn’t that the werewolf side? Wasn’t that something from Matt that made Jex want him so bad?

Jex didn’t like that thought. Still, even as it dwindled in his mind, he knew it wasn’t really true. Was it? Yeah, as a werewolf, Matt believed in mates, which was really just the soul mate rule, wasn’t it? They just had a better way of identifying that said soul mate, so that once they came across them, they wouldn’t give them up. It was a part of their making, but at the end of the day, wasn’t that what it was for humans and human soul mates—just that they only had to just trust? They had to let everything happen and hope they were right, and that this was the place they were meant to be.

So wasn’t it better that Matt was a werewolf, who knew for a fact, one that ran deep inside his body, that Jex was his? Didn’t that mean that the emotions Jex was feeling inside him, the ones that he’d felt from the beginning, the ones that were all about rock hard cock that turned into a friendship Jex didn’t want to lose—wasn’t that soul mates? Wasn’t that what love was about—the lust that was there because the love was? Wasn’t that what people looked for their whole lives?

And if that was true, and if that was something Jex wanted, why shouldn’t he go for it? What was there to lose, really? Matt was his, that was what he said when he wanted to be with him, even if it meant nothing more than a friend, right?

“Jex?” Matt’s voice was so soft and tender Jex felt a burning behind his eyes.

So do you trust a guy who is a werewolf, who’s telling you you’re the only person he wants to be with? And that he wants that forever? ‘Cause that’s what it means when someone calls you his mate, isn’t it?

“My head hurts,” was Jex’s only response.

“What?” Matt jumped up “Are you hurt, do you need me to get you something?”

Jex laughed at the concern that lined Matt’s body. He reacted to that one little word as if his life would be over because of it.

“Relax.” Jex smiled. “It hurts ‘cause of all the thinking. You’ve dumped some huge shit on me. I’m just trying to work through it.”

“Oh.” Matt returned the smiled and relaxed. His body had been moving up Jex’s as he examined Jex’s
head. When he sank back down, he landed lips to lips with
Jex, his body a hard, hot line along the top of his. “Sorry.”

Jex smiled again and closed the gap between their mouths, wanting to have the taste of Matt in his mouth again. Wanting to feel that rough but soft tongue on his again. Wanting…fuck, he wanted everything. Everything that Matt wanted to give him.

“So you said you wanted to fuck me?” Jex asked when they came up for breath.

Matt’s eyes went dark again, burning away the conversation, the fears, the answers left unsaid, and took Jex back to painful perception of naked body rubbing up against naked body.

Matt smiled—a predator’s smile. It was the beast in him. Jex liked that look. It made a shudder play up his spine and snap images of the beast that put a little fear deep inside his stomach. Everything flashed, beast to Matt, holding him down, making Jex his.

“Fuck…” Jex moaned, his body arching further into Matt’s chest, his eyes closed on the erotic images playing around him. He loved the feel of the hot flesh of Matt on top of him. Jex’s nipples scraping against the hard plane of Matt’s pecs, scattering pleasure through his body. His dick, already on the ready, became rock hard and insistent. There wasn’t any patience in him for Matt. Now that he knew, he never had to wait. He was aware if he had only trusted his heart a little, he could have let down his guard a bit and maybe, just maybe, Matt would have seen and helped tear down the rest.

God, Jex couldn’t believe this. He couldn’t believe he was here in the same bed, naked with a man he’d long ago forgotten made his cock got hard whenever he was around.

“Jex,” Matt moaned softly, his tone making Jex open his eyes. What he saw smashed him and made him wither slightly.

“Fuck me,” Jex whimpered, his eyes opening slightly, pleading with with his lover who looked down at him. “Please, Matty, fuck me—fuck me hard.”

The words turned something deep inside Matt. He growled, and it was raw. A look entered his eyes and his whole body shuddered and tightened above Jex.

The look made Jex’s heart leap. He was a little afraid of that look in his eyes—a look of total need. And that fear tightened the muscles of Jex’s stomach and made his cock throb with a tinge of pain that spoke of spillage and a jerk that hit Matt’s lower abdomen and pulled him right back onto his knees.

“Right,” Matt growled, his tone nearly lost in his obvious need. Hot was the only way Jex could describe it. Matt looked around the bed, then the room, looking for something that Jex couldn’t comprehend. Nothing meant anything to him at this moment, except the fact that he needed to feel the slight burning pain he was going to have when Matt entered him.

“You’ve played with yourself a lot?” Matt asked.