S
he felt as if she hadn’t slept in days. And actually, she hadn’t—or not much anyway. But she wasn’t tired. Her cleaning lady was coming tomorrow, but she began going through the kitchen, living room, and bedroom like a maniac, cleaning and straightening up. Her mind was on an intimate dinner for two. Contrary to what everyone believed, Belinda could cook—in fact, she was an excellent cook. She decided on pasta primavera and a Caesar salad. By candlelight.
She had an incredible urge to buy something new and sexy, a negligee. She laughed. If she did that, they wouldn’t get around to eating—not food anyway.
She was married.
To a man she hadn’t known for very long, but being with him was so damn perfect that it felt just like a cliché. It felt as if they had known each other their whole lives. It was
right
She was impossibly in love, now that she had let her fear go and her emotions run free.
Jack was perfect.
Together they were perfect.
And she had made a decision. She was going to tell Jack the truth. Come clean. He would understand, she was sure of it. He would be pleased. And she was positive he would confess to his past with Nancy. He had to.
She was putting fresh sheets on the bed when the phone rang. She was tempted not to answer it—she hadn’t even checked her messages—but what if it was Jack? She picked up and was instantly disappointed. It was Abe.
“Belinda, I have to see you this minute, this goddamn minute! Come down to my office!”
She sucked in her breath. Abe was not going to ruin her
day—her life. “Abe, first of all, I refuse to be ordered around by anyone. Secondly, I’m busy.”
“This is fucking crucial,” Abe snapped. “It’s about that stud con artist you married.”
She froze, just for a second. “You mean Jack. Please refrain from calling him names, Abe, or I’ll hang up this goddamn minute!”
“I call ’em as I see ’em, and you know it!”
“How did you find out?”
“He came down here to tell me.”
Belinda felt a tentacle of dread begin to wrap itself around her. She shook it off. “Look, I knew you would disapprove, but I love him and we’re married and you can’t do anything about it. I’ve got to go. Good-bye.”
“You wait—”
She hung up. Slightly out of breath. Why would Jack go down there to tell him? Well, when he came home she would find out. She would ask. And as for Abe, he could only ruin the most perfect day of her life if she let him. She finished making the bed.
She was sorting through her lingerie an hour and a half later when the doorbell rang. It couldn’t be Jack back so soon—but it had to be. She ran to the door, unable to suppress the wonderful feelings of excitement and delight rushing through her.
Abe shouldered his way in, something small and black in his hand.
“I don’t believe this!” Belinda cried, furious at the intrusion and disappointed that it wasn’t Jack.
Abe waved what appeared to be an audiocassette at her. “And I don’t believe you! Like most goddamn broads, you think with your fucking cunt, not your head.”
She was shocked that he would talk to her that way—shocked and angry. “Get out this minute!”
“Belinda, you are a big fucking fool, and I’m not leaving until you hear this tape.”
Belinda clenched her fists as he strode to the tape deck and inserted the cassette. She regathered her composure, but that icy tentacle of dread was back, clutching at her vitals.
“I tape every minute of every day in my office,” Abe said, “and I want you to hear this conversation.” As he rewound the tape, he glanced at her. “Better sit down.”
Of course she stood. Then she heard Abe’s voice, on the tape:
What do you want? You’ve got about two minutes before security comes and throws you out.
I want [pause] congratulations.
Belinda tensed. It was Jack, and there was something in his tone that was unfamiliar and frightening and momentarily undefinable.
Her father’s rude laugh sounded, and he was saying:
For what? Shortest career in history?
For my marriage. To your daughter.
Laughter followed, and it was malicious. Belinda’s dread grew.
What?
[Laughter] How do you feel about having a grandson with the last name of Ford? Because you can bet we’ve been working on it.
You little cocksucker! I don’t know how you did it, but I’ll undo it!—before you can even blink!
“What’s wrong, Glassman? Or should I call you Abe? No, wait—Dad?
You have a lot of balls, to dare to use my daughter to get at me.
It was a stroke of genius, wasn’t it? I knew there had to be some way I could avenge myself. Appropriate, wouldn’t you say?
You think you can win? Beat me? You think I’ll stand for this? You stupid bastard! I don’t know how you did it, but your marriage is over before it even began—I guarantee that.
How does it feel? How does it feel to have your enemy
as a son-in-law? Huh? How does it feel, you fucking bastard? And I’ll never agree to a divorce—never. You’re stuck with me until the day you die.
We’ll see! How could Belinda be such a fool, to let herself be conned by you?
Does it really matter? And if you think you’re going to have your thugs work me over again, think twice. My lawyer still has that letter telling everything—only now it’s been updated. If I go, I’m taking you with me—old man.
Get out! Get out while you can. But if you think I’ll give Belinda a single penny while she’s married to you, you’re wrong. She gets nothing! Nothing! If she has your son—
he
gets nothing! Not one fucking penny!
How does it feel to lose?
Abe turned off the tape.
Belinda was sitting. She was so numb she couldn’t think, didn’t want to, couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe.
Abe said, “Jack Ford has been my enemy for seventeen years, and he’s using you to shaft me—in case the tape wasn’t clear.”
His words brought back her ability to think.
Enemy for seventeen years …
Using me …
Lies. Their love, all lies. She lifted a white face toward her father. “Get out!” she gasped. “Get out, you bastard, before I—” She choked, looking quickly away. She had never hated her father more.
Oh, Jack! Tell me it’s not true!
No!
“Don’t worry,” Abe said. “We won’t let that little prick get away with this. I’ll call you tomorrow after I talk with my lawyers.”
She couldn’t answer—her hold on her self-control was too precarious. She heard him leaving. The front door slammed. She hugged herself hard, shivering.
It was a stroke of genius, I knew there had to be a way to avenge myself. Appropriate, wouldn’t you say?
How does it feel to lose?
I’II never agree to a divorce, never. You’re stuck with me
.
How do you feel about having a grandson with the last name of Ford?
Belinda got up and ran to the bathroom, but her heaves were dry. She knelt there at the cold porcelain bowl for a long time. He didn’t know she was pregnant, of course, but now everything was clear, so clear. The echoes wouldn’t go away.
It was a stroke of genius …
Avenge myself …
Appropriate …
Stroke of genius …
116
T
here was no sweet, sweet feeling of triumph. Just a cold, panicky fear. And the sickness.
Jack swung the Ferrari around a curve. He felt the awful weight of his guilt, and that made him angry. Angrier. He had been pushed too far.
He knew Glassman would make a move now. His guts cramped at the thought. Glassman would try to get at Belinda, try to turn her against him. Maybe even bully her. He could handle it. He knew he could. Belinda already loved him.
If worse came to worst, he would have to come clean, explain it all. His hands grew white on the steering wheel.
He had to get to her now.
Before Glassman.
Before she found out the truth—and the deceit.
She met him at the door, looking ill.
“Are you all right?” he asked, reaching out.
She struck his hand away. “Don’t touch me.”
He froze.
She knew
. “What’s wrong?”
“ ‘It was a stroke of genius,’ ”; she said, and he felt something sick and cold plunge into his guts. “ ‘I knew there had to be some way to avenge myself. Appropriate, wouldn’t you say?’ ”
He stared, horrified at hearing his own cruel words coming from her lips.
Her voice broke. “ ‘How does it feel to lose?’ ”
“Belinda …” he said, feeling desperation uncoiling within him.
She whirled away. She pointed to the stereo system, confusing him. “It’s all on tape—every word.” She turned to him, her eyes huge and brown in her white, pinched face. “Deny it,” she begged.
For just a moment Jack closed his eyes. Dear God, no. Not this. Those words had been meant for Glassman, not for Belinda. Never for Belinda.
“You can’t deny it, can you?” she whispered.
His face was agonized and seeking. “Belinda, it’s not the way it sounds.”
“Just deny it, damn you!” she shouted. “Deny that you married me to get at my father! Deny it!”
He inhaled. “I can’t lie to you anymore. I can’t deny it.”
“All lies!” she said brokenly. Tears swam in her eyes. “All lies—every minute with you has been a lie!”
“No!” he said hoarsely. “No, it’s not all lies!”
She looked at him, so stricken with despair, hurt, agony, and hope that he hated himself.
“How much I want you isn’t a lie. That’s real. You know it’s real.”
“Oh, good!” she shrilled. “You want to fuck me! Well, buddy, welcome to the crowd and get to the end of the line!”
“Don’t make it sound like that,” he said. “Belinda, I love you.”
“How dare you!” she screamed. “Well, I hate you. Get out! Get out and don’t ever come back!”
He felt something twist inside, like a knife. He went to her, placing his hands on the smooth curves of her shoulders, but she turned away with a cry.
“I didn’t want to hurt you,” he said hoarsely to her back, and God knew, it was true. “Belinda, listen to me—I didn’t want to hurt you.”
She laughed hysterically. “My consolation prize.”
“Let’s talk this through, please!”
“There’s nothing more to talk about.” She turned, lifting a white face and glazed eyes. “Except a divorce.”
He was stunned. It took a moment to recover. “I don’t want a divorce.”
“Oh, right! Because of Abe—you’ll never give me a divorce! Well, you just listen good, Jack. You’ve got another think coming if you think I’m going to stay married to a lower-class piece of ass like yourself. Like I said once before—pricks are a dime a dozen. And I am my father’s daughter—or have you suddenly forgotten? How does it feel, Jack, to have another Glassman after your ass?”
At first Jack didn’t answer. Her eyes were blazing with fury. And possibly with hate. “I thought you loved me. If you loved me, you’d give me another chance and you’d forgive me.”
Belinda laughed. “You’ve got to be kidding! Love, Jack? It was just the hots—like I said, you are prime meat. Surely you’ve made that mistake too?”
His jaw tightened. “Don’t push me away.”
“Nancy was right,” Belinda cried. “You’re nothing but a liar, a user, and a loser. One big fat loser. Get out, Jack. You’re really pressing your luck.”
“You are just like your old man, aren’t you?” He turned stiffly on his heel. He was at the door, his hand on the knob, when she spat out, “I’ll never forgive you.”
“Lady,” he snarled, “I just changed my mind. I couldn’t care less.”
“Never.”
117