Loving Helen (10 page)

Though Miss Helen’s shyness around him had improved, particularly during the hours they’d worked on the dollhouse, a part of her was still very reserved — cautious
.
She’d admitted to not fearing him, and he believed her, yet she continued to hold back, as if she was afraid of his becoming too familiar. Once, not so many weeks ago, he would have thought Miss Helen had plenty of time ahead of her to get used to him, particularly if he married Grace and Miss Helen became his sister-in-law.

But now
… Samuel attempted to push the growing realizations to the back of his mind. Now, it did not seem likely that Grace would choose him over Nicholas.
Not surprising.
What was unexpected were his feelings — or lack thereof — on the matter. Samuel cared about Grace. He still believed that they might be happy together. But it was her sister he’d found occupying his thoughts of late. Worse than Grace’s potential rejection, it appeared that Miss Helen would not be his guest much longer. Just yesterday, Christopher had returned with news of their inheritance. And while it boded well for the Thatcher family, Samuel could not bring himself to feel very happy about it. Beth would be devastated when Miss Helen left, and he would miss her company as well.

It is because of Beth that I am so upset about her leaving.
Since becoming a parent, his thoughts always had to be first and foremost, for Beth’s welfare.
She will be sad when Miss Helen leaves, and so I will be sad with her.

“I think we have completed everything. I declare the dollhouse finished,” Samuel said, feeling more than a twinge of regret. The cold December evenings had passed pleasantly in Miss Helen’s company, during a time he might otherwise have felt desolate. In addition to missing Elizabeth more at this festive time of year, he’d lost Grace’s companionship as well. She hadn’t come to see him at the fence for quite some time, not since the day he’d seen her on the road with Nicholas.

Samuel stepped back beside Miss Helen, and together they admired their work.

“I think I should like to live there,” she said quietly.

There was a wistfulness in her tone that caught him off-guard. He was unsure how to respond and finally came up with, “It is a splendid house.” He wondered if Helen had dreams and aspirations for her future. Did she aspire to marry someone like Lord Sutherland? Had her time spent with her grandfather roused a desire for a fine home and a titled husband?

“Splendid,” she said. “Excepting the fact that the inhabitants shall have to climb up the outside wall to reach the attic nursery.”

“Bah.” Samuel chuckled and waved his hand dismissively. “A petty detail. And a good way to add some adventure to one’s day. Beth will not be bothered by it.”

Miss Helen’s lips twitched. “I would not be so certain if I were you.” She reached in, adjusting the furniture in the kitchen once more. “Beth is very intelligent and is quite specific in her opinions.”

“Well, she shall have to request another father if she does not absolutely
adore
this dollhouse.” His gaze and tone turned serious. “I thank you both.” He looked from Miss Helen to her maid, who was busily sewing in the opposite corner. “It would have been very plain without your talents.”

“I am so glad we finished in time,” Miss Helen said.

“As am I.” Samuel glanced at her as an acute and strange awareness concerning time passed over him. The past three Decembers had been nothing but misery. Of course giving Beth presents had always made for joy on Christmas morning, but the month leading up to the holiday had seemed to crawl by, a time during which the constant loneliness that was his only companion hurt more keenly. But this December had been different. It has passed quickly — too quickly — filled with delightful evenings spent at Miss Helen’s side, as together they created this treasure for Beth.

“Christmas Eve will not see us up late working,” Samuel said, half wishing it would have. The invitation to Nicholas’s Christmas Eve ball still lay in his coat pocket, where it had for several days, ever since he’d received it. The time for a proper response had long passed, and Samuel was not yet certain whether he wished to attend
— to see for myself the path Grace has chosen, and to discover that my hope has been in vain.

Had the dollhouse not been completed, his decision would have been easy. Making Christmas ready for Beth would have come first.

“You are finished?” Harrison asked, entering the room, snow still clinging to his boots. “And just in the nick of time.” He pulled a letter from his pocket and directed his gaze at Miss Helen. “This arrived from your father. It appears he’s had it for some time and didn’t send it on. It had already been opened.”

Miss Helen took the letter and read it quickly, her fingers trembling. “It is from Lord Sutherland,” she said, glancing about the room at the three of them. “He has requested my company, and Christopher’s — and yours—” she glanced up at Miranda and then Harrison — “for the duration of the Christmas season.”

Samuel watched as a myriad of emotions crossed Miss Helen’s face. Her first thought, he would have bet, had been elation at the thought of seeing Grace. And her second thought seemed to be one of disappointment and perhaps sadness, making him wonder if she was thinking of Beth and how she would miss their daily adventures.

Will she miss me? Or does she think of me simply as Beth’s father?
It was entirely probable that she did, older as he was.

Regardless of Miss Helen’s feelings, they would miss her. Over the past few weeks it seemed she had spent more time with Beth than her nanny did. Several times, Samuel had been on the verge of asking Miss Helen if she would consider a position as Beth’s governess, something that would make Beth immensely happy and bring him a great deal of relief. He would worry about Miss Helen were she to become a governess elsewhere. And besides, her quiet, reserved manner was the very antithesis of Beth’s rambunctious one. They were a good balance for each other. But now that the matter of the inheritance had been settled favorably, Miss Helen would not need to be employed. Neither did she need to stay any longer, now that she had been summoned to Sutherland Hall.

“You must go,” Samuel forced himself to say. “Your sister should not be without you at Christmas.” Grace had been away from her family long enough. Whatever was to happen between her and Nicholas would happen, and it would not be affected by proximity to her family now.

“But Lord Sutherland —” Miss Helen set the letter aside and dropped into a chair.

“Do not be frightened of Nicholas,” Samuel said. “I believe your sister has tamed him considerably, else he would have run me over the day I spied them kissing at the crossroad.”

“What?” Miss Helen stood abruptly. “They were kissing — on the road?”

“
He
was kissing
her
. Let’s leave it at that,” Samuel said, wishing he hadn’t brought it up. Miss Helen’s wide eyes and open mouth clearly showed how appalled she was. And her maid’s lips had turned down so low as to almost reach her chin. Harrison eyed the door with a look that seemed to suggest he was about to charge through it, straight over to Sutherland Hall to defend Grace’s honor.

“Suffice it say,” Samuel added hastily, “that I have reason to believe they have come to care deeply for each other. If not, Lord Sutherland would not have invited you for so much as tea.”

“What is this about tea?” Christopher asked, carrying an armload of wood into the house.

“You are to let me do that,” Harrison scolded.

“I know you’re more than capable,” Christopher said. “But I enjoy the work.”

Restless, that one,
Samuel thought. He hoped Christopher would use their recently awarded inheritance wisely and find a profession that suited him. At twenty he still had time to learn a trade. And it looked probable that he would have enough funds to receive some schooling, at least, if that was his desire, as it seemed likely that at least one of his sisters would not be in need of support. Kindly, he had agreed to hold off sharing his good news until after Christmas.

At the least I would like to be the one to present Grace with the option for freedom she has longed for.

“I’ll begin packing at once.” Miranda brushed past them and hurried toward the stairs.

Samuel guessed she was eager to see Grace. He knew it had been difficult for her to be separated from her charge.

“Where are you going?” Christopher asked. “Has something happened I ought to be made aware of?”

“Yes. Your sister has been caught kissing at the crossroad,” Harrison muttered irritably, his eyes still fixed upon the door.

“Truly?” Christopher’s brows rose as he turned his gaze on Helen.

“Not I!” Her mouth hung open, as if appalled at the thought.

Of kissing in public, or just of kissing?
Samuel wondered. “Your other sister,” he clarified for Christopher. “I caught Lord Sutherland kissing her while they were out driving.”

A grin spread across Christopher’s face. “About time, I’d say. Jolly good news, that.”

Helen shook her head and started toward the door. “I must tell Beth goodbye.” She took her cloak from the hook and threw it around her shoulders. Samuel watched her leave, imagining how she must feel.

Her sister. My daughter. Is there not a way for Miss Helen to have both?
He intended to find out, to put Grace to a decision, though he’d already guessed what her answer was likely to be.

But if Grace were here with me, then Helen could remain. Beth would be happy. I could be too. And if Grace marries Nicholas, could Helen not stay with her sister and visit here daily?

So simple, Samuel feared it to be impossible.

The doors to Sutherland Hall opened, and a rather stern-looking butler stood back to admit them.

“Where is she? What have you done with her?” Harrison demanded, leading the march across the vast foyer, in search of Grace, with Christopher and Miranda close on his heel. “I’ve a need to see her with my own eyes before I’m about any other tasks.”

Helen lingered behind. Her gaze flitted about, taking in the dark wood and somewhat somber appearance of the entrance hall. Compared to the light of Mr. Preston’s house, Lord Sutherland’s seemed practically medieval, though with a touch of festiveness, at least. Holly adorned all of the banisters.

How has Grace survived here?
Eager to see her, though somewhat frightened of what else she might find, Helen hurried forward, arriving at the drawing room doors at the same time as the others. Together they entered, with Lord Sutherland’s butler, looking rather concerned, close behind.

“It is quite all right,” the man who had to be Lord Sutherland called over their heads as they rushed toward Grace. Helen spied her as she sprang from the bottom step of a ladder near an enormous evergreen tree, the scent of which filled the room.

“Helen!” Grace gathered her in a fierce hug and held her tight for a long minute, then pulled away, staring at her as if making certain she was real.

“Oh, Grace.” Helen squeezed her hands as tears blurred her vision.

“And have you no thought for me?” Christopher asked glibly.

“Of course I do.” Grace extended one arm and pulled him close as well. The three of them huddled together, heads bent close, each speaking and laughing at once.

“You are well?” Helen asked. She looked closely at her sister, wearing a pretty gown and with a smile that most definitely reached her eyes.

“Very,” Grace said merrily. “And you?”

Helen nodded. “But I’ve missed you so.”
There is much I want to tell you.

“And me? No one cares for me?” Christopher said. “I might have stubbed my toe on the way here or be half starved, as I’ve not eaten since this morning, and the two of you wouldn’t notice.”

Grace ruffled his hair as if he were still a little boy. “We will always notice you.” She studied him critically. “And I daresay it will not be long before other females do as well.”

“None of that for me, thank you,” Christopher said, and they all laughed.

Helen felt as if her heart might burst. The three of them together like this, with a fragrant Christmas tree behind them, in such a grand house … it was almost like being at Grandfather’s again.

“I must introduce you to Lord Sutherland,” Grace said, stepping from their embrace.

She turned her head, looking around the room. Helen followed her gaze and watched as it landed on the man who had spoken earlier and now leaned casually against the doorframe.

Something unspoken seemed to pass between them before Grace whispered, “Thank you.”

Lord Sutherland shrugged, as if inviting Grace’s family and servants here were nothing. He returned Grace’s smile in a way that left no doubt as to his feelings.

He is in love with her too. Poor Mr. Preston.

“It took you all long enough,” Lord Sutherland said in a loud voice. They all turned towards him. “It has been nearly a month since I requested your company. Why did you not come sooner?”

Harrison and Miranda exchanged uneasy glances, and Helen cringed.
Is he angry?
Grace had written Lord Sutherland’s moods were volatile, but a change this quick was almost unbelievable. A moment ago, he’d seemed pleased to see them.