Mage Catalyst (24 page)

“I think so.” It had been relatively simple.
“Okay, give it a go then.”
I placed my hands in front of me as I slowly concentrated on the thread. Once I was sure I had the thread right, I began to duplicate the effect without trying to focus too much on what I was doing. I’d learned from the shield spell that the trick was to focus on the pattern and not the thread.
I flexed my fingers and began. I watched with satisfaction as the field worked its way up my arms and across my chest. Immediately my world was plunged into darkness. This wasn’t just night, or being in the dark. This was a complete lack of light. Complete darkness. I shivered slightly and it felt as if I’d walked into a walk-in freezer.
I must have shouted or gasped in fright, because I heard Renee chuckle. “Everything go black?”
“Yeah,” I replied shakily. It was starting to get uncomfortably cold.
“I think it’s getting colder.”
“Yep, it’ll do that, absence of light,” Renee confirmed. “It’s not dangerous.”
“I don’t like this,” I stated. It was getting quite uncomfortable.
“Yeah,” Renee whispered. “It’s quite disconcerting.”
“I don’t see how this is in any way useful,” I grumbled.
“Oh, it’s not.” Renee chuckled. “Not like that anyway – you’re doing it wrong.”
I immediately dropped the field around me and was bombarded by the sensation of light and heat washing over my body. I had to clench my eyes shut. When I at last opened my eyes I couldn’t see properly. Everything was blurry and my eyes stung a little as they filled with tears. I began to blink rapidly, trying not to let them fall.

“You let me keep that field up all that time before telling me that I was doing it wrong?” I accused darkly.
“Don’t worry. We all do that the first time,” Renee explained. “You were making the weave too tight.”
“What?”
“You have to let some light through.”
“What?”
“You need light to see,” Renee explained, breaking off each word as if speaking to a child. “Let some light through your field.”
“But then I won’t be invisible,” I argued.
“Not completely, no,” Renee agreed. “That’s not the point though. You don’t need to be completely invisible.”
I tried it again, this time ensuring that the threads were a little looser. The field enveloped me and it was if a veil had been thrown over my eyes. It was weird, the veil moved and pulsed across my vision and made areas of the room fade into a greyish haze and then become visible again.
“This is weird.”
“You’re doing it right then,” Renee confirmed. “Go into the hall and have a look, there’s a mirror.”
I stumbled across the room, accidently catching my shin on the edge of the couch that I couldn’t see properly.
“Watch for the vase,” Renee yelled out, reminding me of its existence just before it flashed into my vision and then immediately disappeared.
“How do you get around like this?” I called back.
“The better you get at the technique, the easier it becomes to see. I’m almost at the point where my vision is hardly impaired at all,” Renee explained. “You’ll get better with more practice.”
“If I don’t accidently walk off a cliff first,” I murmured ruefully. My shin still hurt.
It took a little bit of time to make my way across to the mirror.
“Hey! I’ve been meaning to ask you. Why can’t I see mana in the mirror?”
When I looked directly at Renee I could see the mana field surrounding her. Even through the invisibility field I could clearly make out the mana writhing across her flesh. It shimmered into my vision with an intensity that was impossible to ignore. I couldn’t help but see the mana when I looked at her. However when I looked at her through the mirrors reflection, I just saw a woman sitting on a couch – there was nothing unusual about her.
“It’s got something to do with light frequency and refraction. I didn’t quite understand it when my grandfather tried to explain that to me either. But it’s in one of the documents.”
I looked at my own reflection in the mirror. It was very strange. I could just vaguely make out my outline. It was infuriating as the veil across my vision didn’t exactly stand still long enough for me to inspect the mirror properly. A blurry haze would pass before my eyes and I’d have to wait several seconds before it passed and I could see again.

When I could see my reflection, it was like I’d become insubstantial. I could definitely see through myself to the wall behind me. There was a pulsating distortion around my body though that created a fuzzy blur. I found that once I moved I could make out the outline of my shape through the blur. It was possible when I wasn’t moving, but it was much harder.
“I still can’t see this being overly useful,” I commented. “I just can’t see well enough.”
“Practice,” Renee stated simply as she moved to stand next to the mirror.
“This is probably what I’m best at,” Renee explained. “It all comes down to how much light that you let through the field. The ability to move around relatively undetected has been quite useful.” Renee said.
“Breaking into banks?”
“Actually, escaping boring lectures,” Renee shot back.
I chuckled as I took another glance around the mana-veiled room. This would be useful to get out of school.
“It would be a pretty slow escape for me right now.” I laughed. “I dare say that I’d accidently barrel straight into a teacher without seeing them.”
“Motion appears to be more visible through the haze,” Renee commented.
“Haze?”
“It’s what my grandfather called the greyish blurring effect caused by the field.”
“Good word.” I conceded thoughtfully.
“It’s something to do with the human ability to recognise movement. You won’t necessarily see the shape or details but you’ll definitely notice movement,” Renee explained. “He said it was something to do with the way in which the human eye interprets motion.”
“What does it look like when you’re good at it?”
“Take your field down,” Renee ordered and nodded as I did so. I watched as my reflection suddenly blurred into view in the mirror. It was quite an interesting effect as I phased into visibility.
“Close your eyes,” Renee murmured.
I could see Renee’s mana field move closer and I closed my eyes.
I felt Renee’s body against mine as she wrapped her arms around me from behind. I shivered as her slender arms slid under mine and pulled me in close.
I could feel Renee’s breath against the back of my neck and heard her whisper in my ear.
“Open your eyes,” she instructed.
I opened my eyes and looked about.
There was a slight rippling effect across my vision as I looked into the haze.
Renee was right! I could see everything clearly but it was as if I was looking through a sheet of slightly frosted glass. The details were there but they were indistinct and I had to intensely focus on them to see them.
“Wow,” I muttered. “This is quite a difference.”
“Practice makes perfect.” Renee whispered from behind me.
“Just out of interest, why are we hugging?”
“Why do you think?” Renee smirked.
“Was it because you couldn’t keep your hands off me?” I grinned, wiggling myself around within her grasp so that I was facing her.
“Yeah,” she grinned dryly. “You got me, I jumped on the first excuse I could get. You’re just too much man for a girl like me to resist.”

“Right,” I murmured back as I hugged her closer. I knew she was only joking but it felt good to hear her say it. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her in close. She leant forward and rested her head on my shoulders. We stayed that way for a long time. The only sound was the energy in Renee’s mana field making a slight buzzing noise around us.
I didn’t want this moment to end.

“It’s not working out,” I blurted, focusing on my feet, unable to look Tina in the eyes as I said it.
I’d been dreading this conversation all weekend after I’d left Renee’s. Renee and I hadn’t done anything more than hug but I still felt guilty. I needed to end things properly with Tina first. I owed her that much at least.
I had been obsessing about it all day. I’d arranged to meet Tina at a coffee shop at the shopping centre. I hadn’t meant to but I’d arrived late and found Tina was already waiting for me. She had a look of resigned patience on her face.
I threw myself into the seat across from her and blurted out my line. I didn’t even have the common courtesy to say hello first. I cursed myself. Sometimes I really am an idiot.
I was butchering this.
Tina looked livid. “What?” she demanded.
“It’s not working out,” I repeated. This still wasn’t going any better.
The look on her face was both hurt and angry. I began to nervously fiddle with the small packets of sugar on the table, unable to look at her directly.

“Why? Is this about the party on Friday?” Tina asked, struggling to get control of her voice. “Because I was going to apologise for that.”
“We’re just too different,” I continued, still unwilling to look at her in the face.
“Is it because I was pushing you to be more academic?” she continued. “Because, I don’t care about that anymore.”
“No,” I mumbled. “It’s not that at all.”
“Then what is it then?” Tina said, her voice wobbling.
“It’s just not… working... you know?”
“That’s just repeating the same sentence in a different way.”
“It’s not um… fun, anymore.”
“Fun?”
I nodded silently.
“Relationships aren’t always supposed to be fun,” Tina snapped. “It’s something you have to work at.”
“It’s too hard.”
“You mean you’re not willing to try,” Tina said, with a flinty element entering into her tone.
“No,” I whispered. “I guess not.”
“Then I guess that’s it then,” Tina stated, her voice taking a softer quality.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, and I was. I felt wretched. I should never have gotten into the relationship in the first place. I thought of Renee’s comment yesterday: “You barrel into situations with no idea of how you’re going to get out of them” she had said. She was right.
“Can we still be friends?” I asked.
“That’s just something people say when they break up,” Tina snapped. “It never actually happens.”
I nodded back briefly. I wasn’t going to argue that point with her. I took a deep breath and looked at her face. She looked sullen and angry, but that wasn’t surprising. She was rubbing her tear-stained cheek with her sleeve.
“I’m sorry,” I repeated.
“I’m sorry too,” she replied and immediately got up and walked away.

I watched her go. I waited there for some time as I didn’t want to run into anyone I knew. It was a long lonely walk home where I had plenty to time to mull over just how much of a jerk I was. I hate walking by myself.
Sarah turned up on my doorstep about an hour after I got home. She arrived with a prelude of furious knocking on my door followed by a smack over the face when I eventually opened the door.
“You dumped her?” she hissed at me.
“What?” I mumbled, rubbing my face.
“You just dumped her?” Sarah repeated. “Just like that? That’s harsh – no talking, no trying to work it out?”
I opened my mouth to begin to defend myself when Sarah cut me off again.
“I knew you guys were having some problems, but that’s cold, man!” she yelled, jabbing me in the chest with her finger.
“You never even tried to work at it, or… you know, or even discussed it with her!”
“I…” I began, but finished with the suffix of “I’m sorry”.
“You should be!” Sarah continued. “She deserves better, and quite frankly I expected better from you! Jesus, Devon! You’re not a jerk! What could have possibly caused you to do this to her?”
Sarah didn’t even wait to let me to attempt to get a word in.
“So? What was it? What was this mystery thing that caused you to dump her?” Sarah demanded. “What could have possibly prompted you to make such a hurtful and mean decision without consulting anyone?” Sarah’s voice bored into me, “are you seeing someone else?”
“Err,” I stammered, sounding a little unsure.
“Not even that woman from the club? What was her name? Renee?”
“No,” I argued. “It’s not like that. I was with her last weekend, but we just talked. I didn’t cheat on Tina!” “Renee said that if things weren’t working with me and Tina it’s the best thing to do for both of us,” I continued.
“Well that’s a pretty crappy piece of advice,” Sarah thundered. “Relationships take time and effort. You don’t just bug out the first time things get difficult. Why the hell are you listening to this woman?”
“What she said made sense,” I began, before being cut off again.
“Why didn’t you talk to me, you numbskull?” Sarah demanded. “I even offered!”
“I didn’t feel comfortable talking about this with you. You’re one of Tina’s friends,” I said. “And you and Tony were so happy that we were going out...”
“Keep talking,” she ordered as I’d drifted off into silence, expecting to be cut off.
“I didn’t think it was right to discuss my relationship problems with you as you’re her friend.”
“Why not? She does!”
“Tina talks to you?”
“Of course Tina talks to me,” Sarah said. “So you’ve been too gutless to talk to anyone about this, and now the poor girl has no idea why you’ve even broken up with her.”
I looked down, unsure of what to say next.
“Fix this,” Sarah hissed at me. “Fix it now.”
I didn’t say anything as Sarah turned on her heel and stormed away from me. She slammed the door behind her on the way out. She was right – there wasn’t much else to say. The problem was I didn’t know how to begin to fix this. I wasn’t sure if it was even possible.
School holidays passed without too much comment. Dad was away on business overseas so I didn’t end up spending much time in the city. This was good as I wasn’t sure how I felt about seeing Renee again. I was conflicted between an overwhelming desire to see her again and on the other an overwhelming guilt about that same desire.
I ended up calling up Tina and attempting to make things right, but it didn’t go well. It was a horribly stilted conversation in which I apologised again and told her that I should have handled matters better.
In the end I repeated the old “it’s not you, it’s me line” and immediately cursed myself. Tina was gracious about it, however, and didn’t call me on the fact I’d begun to talk in patronising clichés. She listened to my excuses and didn’t get angry. Still, I could tell she didn’t want to be talking to me. We promised we’d try to remain friends but I think it was an empty promise on both our parts. But I suppose it might have made a difference. Especially since we were both friends with Sarah and wanted to remain that way. When I hung up, apologising again, I didn’t feel any better about the situation and I suspected that neither did Tina.
Tony had spent the holidays working with his brother at the garage and although nothing was said I knew he and Sarah were avoiding me. I can’t say I blamed them but it hurt nonetheless. I saw Garry from time to time but for the most part I spent the holidays watching movies, skating by myself and being alone with my thoughts.
I took the time to practice the invisibility field that Renee had shown me. I showed some improvement but I was nowhere near as good at it as Renee was. I was able to generate a field where I could see most of what was going on around me, but it was still blurry. What I was doing was actually kind of risky. The only way to test the principle properly was to intentionally reveal my powers to strangers and hope that I had gotten it right.
I had attempted it only once publicly before but found that I didn’t have the stomach for it. The mana field didn’t make me completely invisible and as Renee said the human eye is unusually good at picking up movement. I was fine if I remained completely still, but the moment I moved I panicked, fearing that I had been seen. In less than adequate lighting it was relatively safe. In good lighting more people would turn to see where I’d been than I was comfortable with.
It must have looked funny as people would jerk their heads in my direction. Usually they would then screw up their face thoughtfully as they looked around as they tried to determine just what they had seen. I was only caught out once, but I wasn’t sure if the woman was paranoid or just more perceptive than everyone else. She was an older lady who had seen me and she began to immediately shriek about seeing a ghost. She became so distraught that her daughter had to step in to try to quieten her down. The ability to bring old ladies to hysteria soured any entertainment value inherent in the activity. I consoled myself by checking my progress in a mirror from then on. I concluded that I’d be able to make myself invisible when I needed to, but I wasn’t good enough yet to get away with it without danger of being spotted.
At the end of the day it just wasn’t worth the risk.

* * * *

I finally caught up with Tony and Sarah towards the end of the holidays. They had arranged to have a barbeque at one of the local parks and Tony had sent me an invite. I was a little nervous about going, as I didn’t know who else was going. I didn’t particularly want to spend time with Tina. When I arrived it was as I feared: Tina was there. I noticed that Tony and Sarah were both making what I assume they thought were covert glances in our direction.
“Hey you.” Tina smiled fake-brightly. There was a tension behind her eyes that was never there before. She wasn’t as breezy as she seemed.
“Hey.” I tried to smile, hoping it looked natural and at ease.
So as not to keep talking I busied myself with the bag full of chicken sandwiches I’d brought with me, organising them onto plates at the nearby table.
Tony waved at me vaguely but he was in the middle of what appeared to be a losing battle with the barbeque. I could see that already several sausages had lost the battle of attrition and were cast to the side. The sausages at this point were little more than smouldering carcasses made into brittle husks of charcoal.
They now stood as a grim warning to the dangers of barbeque inattention.
Garry nodded at me as he went over to assist Tony. He was a fantastic barbeque cook and understood that barbeques have more than one heat setting.
Damn, it meant I had to keep up appearances with Tina.
“Hey you,” Tina repeated as I moved over towards the table.
“Hey.” I nodded, slinking into a seat on the other side of the table. “What did you get up to on the break?” I began. Even to my ears it sounded lame.
“Oh, I studied, finished some assignments,” Tina replied. “I’ve got a good head start on next term.”
“Why am I not surprised?” I teased.
“You?” Tina asked politely, ignoring my jibe.
“Oh, nothing much,” I replied. “Didn’t seem to get much accomplished at all.”
“Why am I not surprised?” Tina retorted, mimicking my exact tone and phrasing before breaking into a slight giggle.
I couldn’t help but join her. We both giggled nervously.
Tony wandered over with a plate of cooked meat, which he placed tentatively on the table.
“Some survived, eh?” I joked.
“Shut up, it’s harder than it looks,” Tony grunted.
“No, you just need to learn to turn the heat down once in a while,” I commented as he headed back into battle.
Now that Tony had gone, it was just Tina and me again and an increasingly uncomfortable silence.
“Tina,” I began, “I’m sorry about everything.”
“Just don’t,” she cut me off. “Let’s just let it go.”
I shouldn’t have mentioned it. And perhaps I had apologised enough. I didn’t know what to say or how to change the subject. The uncomfortable silence returned, louder than ever. Tina was either unwilling or unable to fill the silence either so we simply just smiled politely and attempted to look at anything other than each other. It was excruciating.
Luckily Sarah must have spotted this or been waiting for it as she swooped in and plonked herself down next to us.
“Looking forward to school next week?” She asked with obviously forced brightness.
“Not really.”
“A little,” Tina mumbled at the same time. We’d managed to sync up our replies almost perfectly in time. This caused us to look at each other and slightly chuckle again.
“Well that certainly shouldn’t have been a great surprise to anyone, from either of you,” Sarah commented.
“Drinks, anyone?” she asked as she grabbed a bottle and gestured towards us both.
“Sure.” I replied as she poured me a glass of coke.
“My family has been coming here for years,” Sarah commented. “Perfect for picnics and barbeques.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty nice,” I agreed as I looked about.
It was a relatively nice day too, for a Melbourne winter. It was pretty good weather for a picnic. There were a number of people who’d had the same idea.

“I’ll have to remember this place,” I added.
“There are bike paths that lead from here. They go pretty much all the way to your house,” Sarah explained.
“That would be an interesting ride.”
“Yeah.” Sarah nodded. “Some bits are quite pretty”.
“How’re you doing anyways, buddy?” Tony drawled as he placed another plate of mostly burnt food on the table and threw himself onto the bench beside me.
I nodded agreeably and began to search for a sausage that wasn’t too badly burned. I eventually selected one and threw it swiftly into a curled up slice of bread. It was still slightly burnt, but I expected that.
“How was working with your brother?” I asked between mouthfuls.
“Pretty much sucked,” Tony grumbled. “The bastard sent me to get a box of sparks on the second day.”
“A box of sparks?” I grunted, “just how stupid does he think you are?”
“Showed him though,” Tony continued.
“How?”
“Well, I took several hours getting them and then when I returned I said that they were all out of sparks at the corner shop.” Tony grinned.
“Sounds reasonable.”
“Only problem was,” Tony said, “he’d actually asked me to get a box of spark plugs.”
“Oh.” I grinned. “That’s not good.”
“No, it kind of put a downer on the rest of the week to be honest.” Tony chuckled.
“At least he didn’t ask you to get a left-handed screw driver,” Tina interjected. “That’s one of the classics isn’t it?”
“No, well, they tried that one on the first day,” Tony grumbled, “which was why I thought the box of spark plugs was a joke.”
“What did you do?” Tina laughed.
“Just handed them a normal screw driver,” Tony replied, straight-faced.
“Oh?” I asked in a raised tone. I was pretty sure I knew where this was going.
“They complained, mind you. They said it wasn’t a left-handed screwdriver,” Tony continued, but I could tell he was having trouble keeping it together though. There was a slight twitch on the corner of his mouth.
“So I…” Tony began.
“…told them to turn it the other way,” we both finished in unison.
Tina and Sarah both rolled their eyes.
“What? You’ve heard that one before?” Tony exclaimed in mock outrage.
“Did that really happen?” Tina asked. “Or is there a book of bad jokes that you guys both have?”