Authors: Samantha Lovern
It had become so clear to him how wrong they were for each other, that evening when the children started gathering around the tree. Celia wasn’t interested in what the children were doing. She happily stepped back and let his mother hand out the presents and tell the kids a story.
She would never be the kind of mother to sit in the floor surrounded by blocks and toy soldiers. She would never be one of those mothers covered in strained green peas, smiling at her son or daughter while they made the mess of a lifetime.
If Celia ever had children he could easily picture her sitting at the table having tea. She would be looking at the morning paper while someone else fed, diapered, and dressed her child, and that just wasn’t what Martin wanted.
When they started picking up boxes she turned to face him. His expression must have showed something. She stopped and tried to smile. “What is it?”
Martin laughed, bent down, and picked up paper, pushing it into one of the boxes. “I was just picturing you with peas in your hair.”
“What?” She laughed, but it wasn't real. “Have you been drinking?”
“I wish I could say yes, but no. I was just thinking about being a parent. Having so many kids of all ages around got me to thinking.” Martin leaned down, picked up a plush Santa and tossed him into a nearby chair.
“Kids? We’re not even married.” Celia laughed, but it still wasn’t a pleasant laugh, and something about it spoke to Martin. It was time to tell her. He picked up three more scraps of paper, pushing them into the box he was carrying. He set it by the tree and turned.
“Do you want kids some day? And if so, how many?” Martin took a few steps and turned on the overhead light. He wanted to see her clearly while they had this discussion, to read her expression and know in his heart that he was right.
“How many? Maybe one, two if we can have twins.”
“I want at least three, and I want them to be raised somewhere where they have spring, fall, and winter. I hope to be someplace where we can have horses, a pond, maybe, some ducks, dogs, even a cat or two.”
“What? Are you Old Mac Donald now?”
“No. Maybe.” Martin laughed, paced, and ran his fingers through his hair before turning to face Celia. “I want my kids to have everything I wanted as a child. I loved animals, still do. Most kids need a pet. It helps them learn to cope with all kinds of things. Responsibility, loyalty, life . . . death.”
Celia shook her head, set her box down and moved closer to Martin. “Is this the excuse you’re going to use to dump me for that girl? A maid, Martin. Really? I can’t believe you would do this. Now? With all of my family here?”
“I’m not doing anything. I’m not going to say anything to any of them. But I’m not going to pretend with you. I tried to tell you a few nights ago. It’s not just Randi . . .”
“Don’t even bother to give me that sad speech about how it’s not me, it’s you. I don’t want to hear it.” Celia turned and started to leave but Martin took her by the arm. He quickly let go as she turned, glaring at him.
“I wasn’t, and it isn’t just me, it’s you, too.”
“Great. You sneak around this house with another woman, and you say it’s my fault. That’s really low.”
“That’s not what I meant. You’re right. I never should have done anything, but so you’ll know, I haven’t slept with her.”
“But you want to.”
“I won’t deny that, but I haven’t, and I know I didn’t go about this the right way. I never meant for any of this to happen, but it did.”
“That’s a fine excuse. You let it happen.”
“True. I did. I could have stopped it, but it made me see that I’m not happy. After this is over I think you’ll see that down deep you weren’t either.”
“Don’t you dare tell me what I am. What I am is angry.” Celia, as usual, didn’t want anyone hearing them, and he could tell it took a lot of self-control to tone it down.
“Tell me, Celia, are you hurt, or just embarrassed? You know we’ve never once said those three little words to each other.”
She glanced up as if to say How dare you? Again. This time Martin’s anger started to show. “Do you love me, Celia? Look me in the eye and tell me that you’re in love with me.”
Celia shook her head, let out a sound of disgust, and stomped off toward the steps. Martin followed her, wanting an answer. She took two steps and turned to look at him. “Even if I did say it now, it wouldn’t ring true.”
“It would if you meant it.” Martin hated moments like this. He never liked hurting people, but he felt he had to make her see the truth.
They had enjoyed each other, they had even been happy at times, but they had never been in love. He took a step back and turned. He walked slowly, waiting, but she didn’t speak.
He reached into the great room and flicked out the lights. Still she said nothing. As he turned and made his way to his temporary room he heard his final answer. It wasn’t those three little words. It wasn’t any words. It was the lonely sound of her high-heeled shoes as they slowly moved up the hardwood steps.
Chapter 58
Santa’s Helper
Since she didn’t trust Celia to actually do the cleaning, Randi waited an hour. Then she came back to the great room and began cleaning up the mess herself. She smiled as she looked at all of the torn boxes and toys that had been left behind. It looked like the kids had enjoyed everything so far.
She picked up a small box that had a motorcycle on it, and a scene from the movie she’d watched earlier came to her mind. Watching Martin’s movie wasn’t the brightest thing she could have done, because it brought out so many emotions.
He was gorgeous, of course, and then there was the jealousy over the kissing scenes. She was just thankful there hadn’t been a bedroom scene. How in the world did people do that? Could she ever be in a relationship with an actor?
She pushed the thought aside, tossing the box into the trash bag. Then she lined up the forgotten toys on the couch and began bringing in the presents.
It was a good thing she hadn’t waited until six, because it took over an hour to arrange the gifts. Being Santa’s Helper was hard work, but it was worth it. When she placed the last gift under the tree, she took out her phone.
She took three pictures but noticed something. There was a spot under the tree that didn’t look right. She got on her knees, pushing and arranging the presents. Letting out a sigh, she nodded. “Finally. Perfection.”
“You missed one.”
Thankfully, Randi never was one to scream when startled, but she did jump at the sound of Martin's voice. She looked at the small gift he held out to her. She took it, watching as he sat down on the couch, pushing the toys aside.
She looked at the man before her and remembered the hardcore Martin from the film she’d watched. The character Moses had been a man racing to prove his innocence. There were lots of chase scenes and shootouts. It was an edge-of-your-seat kind of movie. Martin’s hair had been longer, and maybe darker, but he was definitely better looking in person. Was her anger melting completely for this man?
“There’s no tag.” She looked at the small box, guessing it was for her, but wanting to make him say it.
“It’s yours. I bought it the other day. I hope you like it. Now isn’t the best time to give it to you, but I was afraid you’d leave. When I heard someone moving around, I came out, hoping it would be you.”
Randi gave a slight nod and laughed. “You should have come out sooner and helped me carry all of the junk.” Randi had been sitting on her knees so she moved, sitting Indian-style, and looked at the small box.
Martin leaned back, seeming to relax, since she hadn’t started cursing or throwing things. She looked at the silver and green paper. It was so embarrassing to think of the way she’d acted. A part of her wanted to apologize, but another part wanted to . . .
“I’ve been pacing for the last hour wondering what I’d say when I got the chance.” Martin’s words shattered her thoughts and she looked up.
“What did you decide?”
“I thought I’d start with . . . I’m sorry, and then move on to some groveling and begging. Maybe I should have gotten you a bigger gift.” Martin smiled and put the ball in her court.
Randi could feel the tension easing out. Sometimes when you’d had time to reflect, things didn’t seem as bad. You would start to balance things in your mind. You'd think about things you’d done or said, and you would finally get to the point where you could put yourself in the other person’s shoes.
The anger could still be there, and tried to rise now and then, but it didn’t carry the same weight. There was room for forgiveness to start creeping in, for light to replace the dark, and oftentimes love would heal and replace the hate or anger you’d first felt.
“I don’t know. Sometimes good things come in small packages.” Randi looked at the gift, fingering the pretty bow.
“Open it.”
“I don’t know.”
“Come on. You’ll love it.”
Randi looked at Martin. He sat up in anticipation. When she still hesitated he said one more word.
“Please.”
That one small word most men never used. Maybe it was his tone, or the look in his eyes, but whatever it was, the word pulled at her heart. She did want to know what was in the box, but should she take the gift? Was she ready to forgive and forget?
She started with the bow, and then began to remove the paper. She didn’t want to act like a child, but what young woman didn’t love getting a gift from a handsome young man? She stopped short of opening a black velvet box and looked up again.
“Go on,” was all he said, a smile curling at the corner of his lips.
Randi sighed and turned her gaze back to the box. She didn’t have any idea of what to expect. She tilted the lid open and immediately reached in, running her fingers across the jewels on the small dog that sat smiling at her.
When Martin moved to join her, sitting on the floor by her side, she didn’t protest. “I thought it would suit you. You’re so crazy about those little mutts from out back. When I saw the set, I just had to get it.”
Randi closed her eyes when Martin pushed her hair back. He was so close and he smelled so good.
He kept his tone low when he spoke. “Do you have pierced ears?”
She could only tilt her head toward him as his thumb touched her ear lobe. “Yes,” she managed.
“Good.” He didn’t move his hand. Instead, he trailed his fingers down her neck, but then he pulled back. “Do you like it?”
“Yes. Thanks. I guess you know I didn’t get you anything.”
“I didn’t expect you to, and I don’t want you going out and buying something just because I got you this. I wanted to do this. I bought it days ago.”
“It’s beautiful.” Randi wanted to ask what it cost, but instead she glanced once more at the pin, necklace and earrings. She closed the lid and rose. He looked up at her, waiting for some kind of sign or word. When she held out her hand to him he gave her a smile that she loved.
He rose and faced her, resting his hands on her waist. She knew it would be so good to taste his kisses again, but she just wasn’t sure that was what they really needed at this moment.
“Randi, I’m sorry. I should have told you that first day, but I thought you were playing with me, trying to win over the boss with some silly game. After that I just kept digging in deeper and deeper. You made me feel normal. I got to the point where I didn’t want you to know. I was afraid of what would happen.”
“I’m not happy about it, but I’m trying to understand.”
“Thank heavens. You make me feel like a real person. I liked being your Mike. There was no pressure. No worries about why you wanted me. For the first time in a long time I was just me, and you can’t believe how good that felt.”
“So you like being a normal, plain old person.”
“I do with you.”
“You might regret saying that at some point.”
“I don’t think so.” Martin smiled and leaned in for a kiss, but she stopped him, almost giving in, when her finger touched his soft lips.
“I don’t think we need to start that again, until a few things have been settled.”
Martin nodded and stepped back, holding his hands out as if to say he understood. When he started to step back even more, she shook her head no and reached out, taking his hand.
“Not so fast. I said no kissing, but your job's not over yet.”
He smiled and stepped closer, his tone seductive when he spoke. “What do you have in mind?”
“We need to have a long talk. In the kitchen on the counter, there are some cookies that need to disappear. Are you game, or do you need your beauty sleep?”
Martin raised his hand to her chin and leaned in, kissing her on the cheek. He then pulled back slowly, smiling, as he gestured toward the kitchen.
“I’ll choose cookies with a beautiful woman over sleep any day of the week, especially if that woman is you.”
Chapter 59
Just Like Home
Walking into the kitchen the next morning and finding Ethan and Martin was a pleasant surprise for Lillian. They both looked like they could use a few extra hours of sleep. Ethan was just pouring coffee and when he saw her enter the room, he took another mug from the cabinet.