Make Me Burn: Fireborne, Book 2 (19 page)

Fuck.

And in the morning she would turn on the phone, listen to Brandon’s message again and know she’d been the one to screw up their chance to fix what was between them.

Ram pressed his lips to her forehead. “No, we won’t, Aziza. You need touch. You need comfort and, as you said, satisfaction. I can give you that and restrain myself from taking you.”

“You can?”

Ram inhaled sharply. “I’m not saying it won’t be a challenge. That I don’t want to be inside you, don’t dream about it every time I close my eyes. I do. But I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t. You’re in what you call subdrop, Aziza. You wouldn’t be acting this way if you weren’t. You’ve made it clear to me who you’re with, and his kind doesn’t play well with others.”

“I know what it’s called.”

He kissed her temple, her cheek, moaning against her skin. “I could take you. I could have you in all the ways I’ve wanted to and when you were begging for mercy, I could invite young West in to make all your fantasies come true. But I won’t. Not until you are clearheaded. Until you’re sure of what you want and can offer yourself without guilt or regret.”

“You bastard,” she whimpered without heat. “You could just say no like a normal guy, instead of teasing me like that. Making me crazy.”

“I am not a normal guy.” Ram smiled into her eyes, his own dark emerald with arousal. “I am Jinn. But you
are
still in need. Let me guide you. It’s me, Aziza. I know you. What you need, who you are. Let me touch you, watch you the way I used to and help you find the release you crave.”

God, she was shuddering again. He could guide her. Watch her the way he used to when he was her Jinn Qarin and she thought she was alone. The only difference would be that she could see him now. Satisfaction without regret. “
Yes.
How?”

He bent down and reached for her purse, handing it to her. “Do you still bring it with you everywhere you go? What you used to keep inside that long, purple makeup bag of yours? Or have you cleaned out your purse along with your old, naughty habits?”

Fuck. Her thighs were actually quivering. “It’s still in there.”

Aziza felt strange, as if her skin were too tight. Too hot. As if she would shatter.

He pulled off his shirt and undid his pants, but didn’t take them off, before lying on one side of the bed. “Take off the rest of your clothes, bring your toy and join me on the bed, Aziza.”

You are Fireborne. You need what Ram can give you. Let go. Give in.

The voice was compelling. Stronger than it had ever been before. “Yes, Sir.”

His jaw clenched and he placed his fists behind his head, as if physically restraining himself from reaching for her. “Good girl.”

But she wasn’t. Aziza slid Chiye’s sweatpants down her legs, along with her thong, and stepped out of them.

Ram groaned.

She reached into her purse, unzipping the eight-inch makeup bag and pulling out the thick, flesh-toned dildo that filled it. The one she couldn’t believe Ram knew about. Except that he knew everything. He’d watched her long before they ever met.

Let go. Take what you need.

Dropping her purse on the floor, she crawled onto the bed beside him. “Now what?” she whispered.

“Are you wet?”

Yes. “Ram, I—”

“Show me, Aziza. Please. Make my wish come true and let me do this for you. You and I, there’s never been a need for judgment between us. You are free with me. I want you to spread your legs, use that tiny toy of yours however you need to until you come. Does that sound good to you?”

Yes. You want to say yes.

“Yes, Ram.”

She gripped the dildo in her shaking hand and raised her knees.

“That’s right, sweet. Oh, precious Aziza, that’s good.” He rolled over onto his side to watch her, grabbing the pillow behind him. “Lift your hips.” When she obeyed he placed it beneath them, revealing even more to his gaze.

She was having a hard time breathing until she felt him gently caressing her knee. “I can see how wet you are now, Aziza. Deliciously so. But you need to be filled. Need to find your pleasure. Show me what you want. What you really desire. How you long to be taken.”

It was intimate. Erotic. Aziza licked her lips and positioned the toy at the entrance of her sex, using her fingers at the flattened base of the shaft to push it deep inside her as she arched her hips.

Ram was watching. Touching her skin. That knowledge made her moan as much as the stretch of the toy inside her. The cock inside her. Ram’s. Brandon’s. West’s.
Fuck.

You could take them all. You are Fireborne. You are more. They are yours.

“Deeper, Aziza,” Ram’s voice was raw with lust. “Give yourself over to the dance of it. Thrusting in and out at the pace you need. As hard as you need… Yes, like that. You know what to do, don’t you? You know exactly what to do to give yourself pleasure.”

His voice was like fingertips caressing her breasts. Like a tongue pressed against her clit. “Ram.”

“I’m here with you.” His low words stroked her like a lover’s caress. “Watching you the way I used to. I couldn’t get enough of watching you. And you couldn’t either, could you, sweet girl? I used to wonder if you knew I was there when you slipped into your bath and fondled your breasts, reaching for something, anything to fill your greedy pussy until you were satisfied. Until I was satisfied.”

She planted her feet firmly on the bed and used both hands to pump the ridged cock inside her, groaning when it still wasn’t enough. She wanted to wrap her legs around strong hips. To sink her nails into broad shoulders. “I can’t. I don’t want to do this without you.”

Ram moved closer, his hand firm on her knee as he pressed it higher. “You can. What do you need? Tell me what you fantasize about now. Me? Brandon? West? We’re all hard for you, Aziza. Dying to get inside you. To feel how tight you are. How hot.”

“Yes.”

His laugh was thick with desire, breathless beside her. “Yes, all of us? That would be an experience. Close your eyes and let it happen, Aziza. In your mind you are free to have whatever and whomever you want. To have all of us right here. No consequences. No repercussions.”

All of them. She’d seen that. She’d fantasized about that and she knew she would again.

But right now she wanted more.

She opened her eyes and turned her head to meet his gaze. “You.”

His gaze narrowed. “Me… what, Aziza? What do you need me to do?”

She licked her lower lip, still using her hands to thrust the phallic toy in and out of her sex as he watched. “I want you to take your cock out of your pants and make yourself come for me while
I
watch. Tell me what
you
fantasize about.”

His face flushed and his gaze lowered to watch her hips lifting off the bed. “That is a dangerous request, Aziza.”

“So you can dish it out but you can’t take it? Even if it’s what I want? You said you would give me what I needed.”

His eyes were emeralds lit by fire. “Is that what you need to come?”

“Yes.”

He lay down until his head was right beside hers, their foreheads touching, and growled. “Now who is trying to make who crazy?”

“Tell me, Ram.” Yes. She rocked her hips harder against her toy. Ram. She needed Ram. “You can tell me. You can show me how you like to be taken.”

Her lashes lowered over her eyes as she looked down, watching him pull out that long, glorious erection that she still remembered the taste of. He gripped it in his hands and she licked her lips.

“Aziza.” He tightened his fist so hard around his shaft that his knuckles whitened. “Yes, that is how sweetly you gripped me.” He stroked himself. “In the garden, when I had you against the wall.”

She remembered.

“Fucked me,” she whispered, rocking her hips against the thick toy slipping easily through her arousal. “Oh, Ram, I wanted it. Wanted you to take me so badly. And you did. You took me so hard you set me on fire.”

“I couldn’t stop myself, sweet Aziza,” Ram groaned beside her, his breath on her cheek, his scent arousing her even more. “How could I resist you? I was supposed to wait, but I had to get inside you. Once I did, once I felt you tight around me, so wet and ready for whatever I wanted to do to you…after that, all I could think of was taking you again. Feeling that again. You don’t know how hard it was to resist entering your dreams again and driving you so wild with lust that you wouldn’t be able to resist me when you woke.”

“Yes,”
she cried as she pumped her hips harder. Faster. “Please, Ram. Do it.”

He was groaning her name as he matched her rhythm. “When you came for me tonight I wanted to taste it. I’ve been dying to taste you. I wanted to throw you on the floor and bury my face between your legs and fuck you with my tongue, then roll you over onto your knees and sink my cock inside until you screamed.”

“Ram
,” she cried, taking one hand off the toy and lifting the fingers shimmering with her arousal to his mouth, “taste me.”

“Fuck,” he moaned, closing his lips around her fingers, the power of his hips as they thrust against his hand making the bed shake.

Oh God, yes. Aziza kept the dildo inside her and placed her free hand against her clit, pressing and rubbing it as sparks of electricity zapped up her spine. She could see it in her mind. Ram’s eyes glowing with Jinn light as he pumped his hips against hers. Filling her. Knowing her. Needing her.

He was sucking hard on her fingers, watching her hand work between her legs and moaning as if he was close. Close. She was so close.

He opened his mouth. “Heaven, Aziza. You taste like heaven on my tongue and I can’t hold back. Come with me. Let go and come with me.”

“Kiss me,” she moaned, wanting to taste them both on her tongue.

“Come for me,” he countered. “Say my name and come.”

Her orgasm slammed into her with his words and started her shaking and calling out his name. “
Ram.
I’m coming.
Fuck yes.
”

“Aziza.”
She was close enough to see ecstasy transform his features, to watch his hips jerk and his arousal spurt against his stomach as he climaxed. “Sweet Aziza.”

She was shivering when he looked into her eyes. They stared at each other as they each struggled to catch their breath, neither one wanting to be the first to look away.

That had been…
Intimate
didn’t sound like a big enough word.

“Oh my precious Aziza,” Ram murmured at last. “That was beautiful. There is no other word. Your passion is beautiful.”

So was his. She’d felt so connected to him. Like they belonged to each other.

Only they didn’t.

“I should get dressed.” Aziza pulled out the dildo and curled her legs up to her chest, feeling suddenly exposed.

“Aziza, no. You didn’t do anything wrong. You were perfect.” When she hesitated he lifted himself onto his elbow. “You are perfect. The sexiest woman I’ve ever seen. You don’t need to be ashamed of what you feel. What you need.”

She covered her face with her hands. “I
feel
like a slut. Like I’m dating one man and I just cheated on him with someone else. I’m not even drunk this time. You didn’t even kiss me. And the way I was throwing myself at you…”

He reached off the bed to grab his shirt, wiping off his stomach before pulling her into his arms. “Listen to me, Aziza. You were vulnerable because you played tonight for the first time as a Fireborne. You needed it more than either of us realized. I refuse to let you feel ashamed of that. You did nothing beyond what someone would do in a private room at Underbridge. You were the only one bringing yourself pleasure while I found my own. If we’d kissed I would have taken more.”

He was wrong. It was so much more than anything she’d ever done at a club. Intimate. Emotional. It had felt like making love. “You’re trying to make me feel better.”

Ram sighed. “And you are determined to suffer over what you are. I know you’re conflicted. Torn, more now than ever, between the blood that burns inside you and your feelings for a certain Enforcer who lives and dies by a very specific set of rules.”

“Don’t bring him up.” Aziza winced, shaking her head. “He would
not
be okay with this.”

He pulled her closer, stroking her shoulder with his warm palm, and she breathed him in. He smelled wonderful. Like sex. And he was being so kind to her. So gentle it made her want to cry. She really did need to cuddle.

“I’m still your Qarin, still in my heart, despite my exile.” Ram leaned back against the headboard and dragged her up against his side until her head rested on his shoulder. “I am also a man who longs to do all manner of unspeakable things to you, never doubt it. But, as you’ve told me before, I am something else. Your friend. I know you hate yourself for wanting more than one man. For caring about more than one man. The part of you that is human says the guilt is natural, but it’s unnecessary. Even humans long for more. Fantasize about more. It doesn’t make them bad. Wrong. It makes them…human.”

Déjà vu. Wasn’t that what he’d said in her fantasy?

“I
am
human,” she mumbled against his chest. “I feel human.”