Make Me Whole (24 page)

His mom slid her arm through his. “And you’re blaming yourself too, no doubt.” Galen shifted in his chair. She knew him so well. “You’re nobody’s keeper but your own. So stop assuming responsibility for others. They won’t thank you for it.”

Easier said than done, even if she was right. “So why’d you call the museum and not my cell?” Galen asked. She must’ve called the main line and not his office number if she got Heather. “What are you up to?”

“I am up to nothing. You’re implying that what I’m doing is wrong.”

Galen patted her hand on his arm. “Not wrong. Underhanded, maybe. Sneaky, definitely. But not wrong.”

“You’re letting your imagination run away with you.” His mom scraped the escaped curls back from her face and retied her bun. “I wanted to invite you to Sunday dinner. You haven’t been in a long time. And since I knew the excuse you were going to give me, I planned on nipping it in the bud before you tried.”

“Meaning you were going to harass poor Heather or Knox or someone else into covering for me on one of our busier days.”

“I’m not even asking for a whole day. I think you can get off early one Sunday every couple of months.” It would be better if she at least looked exasperated about it; instead, the expression of insistent reason made him squirm now almost as much as it had when he was younger. Well, it was only a matter of time before she renewed her pledge to see that he was doing more than working all day, every day.

“Okay, you’re right. I can do that.” Agreeing cost him nothing except peace from her checking on him.

She paused, mouth parted, no doubt about to launch her next argument. Then she cocked her head and studied him. She didn’t say anything when she sat back, her expression serene. He wished he knew what she was speculating. They sat in silence, waiting for Clint to come in with an update on Suzane. Maybe they already brought him back to see her. Galen’s mom pulled out her latest crocheting project from her purse and got to work as if she was sitting in her living room and not keeping him from entirely losing his cool by her presence.

“Is it okay if I bring somebody to Sunday dinner?”
Shit
. As soon as the words were out of his mouth Galen scrambled for a way to take them back. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to tell her about Nick, because he’d love for them to meet each other. He just didn’t want to talk about Nick while sitting in a hospital. “Not that I’m saying anything, just wondering.”

“Any friend you bring is fine with me.” She finished the row of stitches and pulled some more yarn out of the ball. “You know that.”

Galen waited for her to ask who, but she didn’t. She could be so unruffled at times; it was annoying and unnatural too. She knew she didn’t have to ask because he’d eventually cave and talk to her.

She started another row and paused to look over her glasses at him again. “About what’s eating at you right now, talk with someone. It doesn’t have to be me. Or Suzane. Or your brother and sister. Maybe you could talk to that new friend of yours. You’ve been making steps toward moving on, and I’m happy to see it. Talking means it doesn’t fester, okay? Take it from somebody who knows.”

Galen slid his arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple. “I love you, Mom. Thank you.”

She smiled and patted the side of his head. “Anytime, dear.”

G
ALEN
sat on the bench outside of Nick’s apartment building, the late afternoon sun warm on his face. He was drained inside and out. Suzane’s scare had woken up too many memories best left buried, and they’d all come roaring back today. At least it was just a scare. Repeating it did little to settle him, and every time he heard sirens in the distance, a quiet leap of fear grabbed a hold of his windpipe and strangled him.

“Galen? Why aren’t you at the museum?” Nick’s quiet voice broke through his thoughts, and Galen’s eyes flew open. “Not that I’m not happy to see you early, but I thought we weren’t meeting here till tonight. What’s wrong?”

He held out his hand, and Nick took it with a warm clasp of his fingers. “I needed to see you.”

“Okay, now you’re worrying me.” Nick tugged on his hand, pulling him up. “Let’s go upstairs, and you can tell me what happened.”

“Suzane fainted and gave herself a concussion falling in her office.” A few inches in another direction and she could’ve died. He tried not to think like that. “I spent the morning with her in the ER before a room opened for her. They want to keep her overnight for observation.” And how Suzane had protested. She’d ripped into him, her son, and anybody unwary enough to step into the room before she’d finally settled down.

Galen had taken it all and dismissed it because he knew deep down how afraid she was of hospitals, how she didn’t want to end up dying in one. He’d lashed out more than once after Bryan had died, and she’d taken his tantrums in stride. He could do no less in return.

“Is she okay? Do they know what caused it?” Nick asked as he unlocked his door and ushered Galen inside.

“Her iron is very low. Her blood cells are taking longer to come back after chemo, and she’s wearing out. Thankfully, it’s almost over. I hate seeing her like this.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know or I would’ve been there.” As soon as the door shut, Galen pulled Nick into his arms. He needed to know that he was real, to feel him, dammit, to feel period. Nick didn’t resist, he held Galen back and kissed his temple. “You should’ve called me.”

“I did, but you were in meetings, and I didn’t want to scare you by leaving a message. I should’ve, but I was spending too much time talking myself into a very bad place.” It felt so good to be held again, to be cared for. Maybe opening himself up to that vulnerability was worth it, just for the moments like this. “Then I realized I was an idiot and that I needed to be with you, so I came over.”

“Come on, we’ll order a pizza, I’ll grab us some beers, and we can watch a movie, relax some,” Nick suggested, starting to ease away. It was the same every night—they’d reach a certain point, and one or both of them would pull back. Not tonight. Tonight Galen needed to experience every bit of the heat between them.

“No.” Galen kissed him, a tender brush of his lips that made him ache inside. He kissed Nick again, seeking more contact, and their lips parted in sweet, open-mouthed kisses that offered the slightest taste and left him needing more. “I don’t want another quiet night. I want you.”

Nick cocked his head and searched his face, a tiny line appearing between his eyebrows. “This isn’t the bad place where your mind went, is it?”

Galen shook his head. He didn’t dare tell Nick that he’d had the momentary thought of walking away, because he wasn’t going to. Telling him would only hurt him for no reason and make him doubt. “No, I’m not reverting to old behavior. I’m not looking for a quick, meaningless fuck. I’m here because with you it does mean something, and I need that tonight. You fill up that empty place inside of me, and I don’t want that to stop.”

Nick smiled and dropped another kiss on Galen’s lips. To Galen’s relief, Nick didn’t hesitate anymore. He didn’t ask Galen if he was sure. He took Galen’s hand and led him down the short hallway to his bedroom, tossing off his suit coat along the way. Sunlight spilled through the half-open slats of the blinds, making lines of light on the bed. Galen’s heart pounded as Nick sat on the edge and kicked off his shoes before beckoning to him. “I have been imagining you naked nearly every waking hour these last couple of weeks. It’s been making me crazy. And it’s gotten worse since we went swimming.”

“You and me both.” Galen laughed under his breath and tugged his shirt off over his head as he slipped out of his own shoes.

“Wait a minute. How did I miss this before?” Nick’s gaze locked on the tattoo low on Galen’s left hip, and he snagged Galen’s wrist to pull him closer. “When did you get a tattoo?”

Galen touched the top of it where it peeked out over the waist of his jeans. He tugged the material lower so Nick could see all of it. It wasn’t big, about an inch or so high, very easy to miss, especially in the dim light of the pool. “About a month or so before I called you. I wanted a reminder. I seemed to need it.”

Nick traced the outline of the stylized ankh with his fingertip. The light touch sent a wave of goose bumps over him. It had been too long since he’d let a touch matter to him. “What did you need to remember?”

“Lots of things, I guess. It changes from day to day. Sometimes it’s that life goes on, and sometimes it’s that life is meant to be lived, not merely put up with.” Galen laid his hand over Nick’s, taking in the press of his fingers. Their eyes met, and they reached for each other at the same time.

Nick bore him back down on the bed and kissed the center of his chest. “That’s a sentiment I can agree with. Live with me.”

Galen’s heart leapt up, and before he could ask Nick what he meant by that statement, he was being kissed. He groaned, heat and desire sweeping everything else away. He pulled Nick’s dress shirt free from his pants and began undoing each button slowly, in no rush despite the demands of his body.

Nick savored him, his tongue stroking Galen’s in long, slow sweeps, his lips nibbling, making him dizzy. Galen parted Nick’s shirt and slid his palms up Nick’s chest. Why the hell had he waited this long? Why couldn’t he have seen sooner that Nick was perfect for him?

“I want you, Nick. Just you, nobody else,” Galen whispered against his mouth as the kiss eased.

“I’m going to hold you to that.” Nick shrugged out of his shirt and kissed the design etched on Galen’s skin. “Since we’re being so honest with each other tonight…. Now that I’ve got you here and you’re not hiding anymore, I’m telling you I’m not letting you go. So if you think you’re going to change your mind, now’s the time to tell me.”

Galen stared up into the shadows of Nick’s eyes and knew there was no going back. He was lost the minute he’d picked up the phone to call Nick about those statues. He’d known that then, even if he hadn’t acknowledged it. “I’m not going to change my mind. Not about you. I’m in this to stay.”

N
ICK
stared into Galen’s eyes, and there was none of the smooth bullshit he’d seen in the past. And he had no reason to not trust Galen’s words, other than his heart feared to take the risk with him again. His heart was going to have to get over it because there was no way in hell that Nick was going to let this moment slip through his fingers.

He knelt up and got rid of the rest of their clothes, then stared down at Galen sprawled naked on his bed. He had him all to himself this time. And as head over heels crazy as he’d been for Galen last time, it was nothing compared to how he felt now. Then it had been like trying to worship a distant star or a quicksilver flame he couldn’t touch without burning himself.

This Galen was so much more approachable and open. There was a kindness in him that Nick hadn’t seen before. Now Nick was truly in love with Galen. Now he could see a future together with him. Whatever dark place Galen had gone to before hadn’t stopped him from coming to Nick.

Galen sat up with a laugh and braced his hands on the bed. “You’re looking at me like you don’t know where to start because you want it all at once.”

Nick laughed in return and rocked forward onto his hands and knees, feeling Galen’s heat as he nuzzled his jaw. “You were right, we still had a lot to learn about each other, and so far I’m liking what I’ve discovered.”

Galen tipped his head back, turning it to the side as he offered up his throat. A shudder rippled through him as Nick’s lips drifted down. In that reaction he sensed Galen’s anticipation. He’d wondered if Galen still preferred forceful over gentle, and his open invitation for rough nips and bites had Nick’s cock surging.

“What do you want?”

“You know what I want,” Galen replied in a voice thick with longing. He shifted his weight to one hand and sank his other hand into Nick’s hair, pulling him closer. “Please.”

Nick smiled against his skin, heat rippling through him as the edge of anticipation sharpened even more. He nuzzled and pressed kisses to his sensitive skin while Galen squirmed and panted, seeking more, a rougher touch, greater contact. Sensing the tension in his body, Nick slid his hand up Galen’s ribcage. His thumb flicked the tightened nipples, making Galen groan.

“You’re a damn tease.”

Nick smiled again. “I’ve been waiting a long time for this, and I’m savoring every minute.”

Galen’s hand tightened in his hair, and before he could turn the tables on him, Nick bit him harder just the way he liked, enough to redden but not break the skin. Galen’s breath came out on a husky groan, and his grip slackened as he trembled. “Oh God, do that again.”

Nick loved the note of pleading in his voice, the way Galen’s body became supple from desire and need. Galen’s hand slid from Nick’s hair to cup his cock and closed his fist around it, pumping. Nick kissed the spot where he’d bitten him, then shifted to another spot that made Galen shiver with a whimpering sound before Nick had even parted his lips.

“I think I could get you to do just about anything I wanted if I played with your neck long enough.” Nick’s teeth grazed it, and Galen squeezed his dick in answer.

“I think you’re right. It makes me absolutely crazy.” Galen turned his head and caught Nick’s mouth, kissing him deeply. He lay back on the bed, pulling Nick down with him. Galen slid his hands all over him, exploring, teasing, wonderful hands, as his tongue played with Nick’s. Now it was Nick’s turn to shudder as the man underneath him reacquainted himself with Nick’s body.

They broke apart, panting, and Galen stared up at him, his eyes dark with desire, sunlight slanting across his face. “I want to be helpless with you.” A bit of uncertainty crept into his expression. “Unless that weirds you out.”

Nick’s breath came out in a rush. They’d hinted at that before, and Galen had always pulled back. He’d never been sure if it had been because Galen didn’t want to trust that much or if he’d been afraid of his own desires, so he hadn’t pushed for it.